Inside Edition

[Melanie R]

This coming Friday (Feb 10)Inside Edition (check the website for
local time viewing) will feature a couple, Troy/Shayla and Shirene.
He is a crossdresser. Shirene is the wife.

http://www.insideedition.com/ourstories/thisweek/

(if link doesn't work, paste it on your url address

Here is the summary:

Cross Dressing Man

This is a story about a cross-dresser; a man who is not gay, but who
loves to dress in women's clothes. We interview the man who wears a
suit and tie to his job as an engineer but, during off hours, enjoys
wearing women's clothes. What's it like to be married to one of
these men? INSIDE EDITION sits down with the couple who explain how
they're just like any other couple.

Shayla and Shirene are good friends who have been on two of our Dignity cruises and educated many people on board positively about our transgender community. They will represent themselves and our community with dignity on this national show. We are so thrilled they are going public with their story.

Record or tune in to Inside Edition Friday, February 10.

Hugs,

Melanie

[Wendy me]

intresting my wife watches that every night could be a good thingy for her to see ...............

[pattied]

I'm going to record it for future use... This could eb a very handy tool in 'outing' myself to the rest of my family, should I begin transition.

[Tina Dixon]

Well I could turn it on, hell of a ice breaker if shes home in time.

[Seriosilly GG]

Woah this looks really interesting. I haven't yet read a book about cross dressing but I hope this will provide some insights with a personal rather than clinical touch. I think I'll tape it and watch it with my CD hehe.

[susancheerleader]

In my area, this episode won't air until Monday.
Tomorrow, (Thursday) in my area, they are airing an episode of women to man dressing.
In both cases, "can you say TIVO?" I'm intresed how this is talked about and comes across.

[Sarahgurl371]

Definatley watch, hopefully my wife will as well.

[Aloha_Dana]

Thanks Melanie for the find. Definately a Tivo item.

Dana

[Andrea's Lynne]

I definitely plan to watch, but I'm cringing somewhat over how the show's producers choose to portray this brave couple.

Keeping my fingers crossed!

[Robertacd]

I definitely plan to watch, but I'm cringing somewhat over how the show's producers choose to portray this brave couple.

Keeping my fingers crossed!

Me too...

Inside Edition is a tabloid news show. Stories are heavy on shock value and low on useful information. I am not holding my breath for a good outcome...

[Melanie R]

Me too...

Inside Edition is a tabloid news show. Stories are heavy on shock value and low on useful information. I am not holding my breath for a good outcome...

From what I have heard from Shirene and Shayla, the producers presented their story very professionally.

Melanie

[Melinda G]

I hope it's tasteful. The media likes to show guys like in that old Budweiser commercial.

[AnnaMaria]

I know Shirene and Shayla both and they are a very strong couple as well as strong personalities I am sure that they would not do it it they thought it would be harmful to the community. I am looking forward to seeing it.

anna

[TGMarla]

I'll be at work. The VCR might do the trick. No TIVO....yet.

[Marla GG]

This is a story about a cross-dresser; a man who is not gay, but who
loves to dress in women's clothes. We interview the man who wears a
suit and tie to his job as an engineer but, during off hours, enjoys
wearing women's clothes. What's it like to be married to one of
these men?

Hmmmmm, I wonder. :undecided I'd better watch and find out! :D

Seriously, I think it's a good thing. In the end, at least more people will have heard of crossdressing, and it sounds like the show will address some of the major myths and misconceptions. Will it change people's attitudes though? Hard to say. I know I have seen programs like this featuring other "odd" lifestyles, and while I did feel I knew more about those lifestyles after watching, I don't think it made them seem any less "odd."

[Julia Cross]

Marla, I sure wish there were more girls like you out there!

I agree, it does sound like it will show dressing in a positive light. Although it likely won't have a huge influence on acceptance, I believe it will open a few more eyes that otherwise may have been closed. A little education is better than none.

Julia

[Denise01]

I will definately be watching, and I hope that the story presents a positive presentation to help all CD, TS and TG people.

Hope a lot of people in my area see it, as i live near a very small village with lot of narrow minded people who just will not understand alternate life styles

Denise

[kaitlin]

Hi All, I've got the TiVo set and can't wait to get home, put on a night gown and watch. I hope it is a + and not a - for our wonderful life style!!!

[Melanie R]

Shirene and Shayla's portion of today's Inside Edition was 3 minutes. They did us all proud with their story. Inside Edition did not sensationize as compared to so many shows. As Shirene said in an email to Peggy and me about the filming, Shayla and I want to pay forward and educating the public is how we can pay forward. We will see them frequently on television in the future.

Melanie

[kathy gg]

Just watched it. Hmm, coudl have been worse. It was not too sensational, but this is probably as positive as a story one could expect from that show.

They seem like a cool couple. Only thing, not fond of the wig the hubby wears, a little too blonde for graocery shopping....:p

[Maria2004]

I liked it. It was the 1st prime time network show that I have seen that actually portrayed the type of CDer "I am" , instead of the more dramatic type which I'm not, and my wife agreed.

[Wendy me]

i watched it and hoped my wife would ...she was talking on the phone with her mom......not that bad of a show.....................

[Cathleen]

A bit too brief in length. Otherwise, the show presented a beautiful, positive picture of a loving couple. Shayla was a lovely bride when they renewed their wedding vows.

Kudos to Inside Edition.

Cathy

[Mistress Frillee]

dude, so like what station airs this show?

ABC?

[SherriePall]

I, too, thought it was too short. Didn't really have any meat on it. Some nice photos, but then was their purpose meant to be? The fact that Shayla wore pants instead of a dress or skirt was probably good since it kind of broke the stereotype of a crossdresser as someone who wears wild clothes (well, maybe some of us do from time to time). Anyhow, Shayla looked beautiful and wife Shirene came across well and not as some kind of oddball. At least this is my opinion of the piece.

[Missy Anne]

Hi All,

We just watched our taped copy and thought it was very professional and positive. We were certainly apprehensive as so much on TV is really junk, shock, etc. We would like to have seen at least a 10 minute segment but this is a great start.

It would be nice to have them as members here!

Does anyone know how the network got the idea initially to cover this subject?

Missy Anne

[Maria2004]

Hi All,


Does anyone know how the network got the idea initially to cover this subject?

Missy Anne

Excellent question, I was wondering the same thing. I think each segment has it's own producer, who conceptulized it, shot and editied to get their view on the subject across, then submits it to the bigwigs who may or may not include it on any particular episode......I wonder...... :cool:

[Melanie R]

Hi All,

We just watched our taped copy and thought it was very professional and positive. We were certainly apprehensive as so much on TV is really junk, shock, etc. We would like to have seen at least a 10 minute segment but this is a great start.

It would be nice to have them as members here!

Does anyone know how the network got the idea initially to cover this subject?

Missy Anne

Shirene and Shayla are members of the Middle Illinois chapter of Tri-Ess. The request for the segment and suggestions for a couple came to Tri-Ess. Shirene and Shayla notified the producer who in the end chose them for the segment. I will communicate with the producers with Oprah about having them on a show on crossdressing and the wife.

Melanie

[Rossie]

If some know what cable chanel it is coming out please tell me.

[Dj]

Took my son to the movies, does anyone know if it will be on again?

I am in central Jersey

Love
Dj

[ReginaK]

Just watched it. Hmm, coudl have been worse. It was not too sensational, but this is probably as positive as a story one could expect from that show.

They seem like a cool couple. Only thing, not fond of the wig the hubby wears, a little too blonde for graocery shopping....:p


A little too blonde and a little too long as well, if you ask me. Kinda had that Barbie doll look going on. It didn't really fit her at all.

[kittypw GG]

Sorry to rain on the parade but does anyone else notice that out of all of the crossdressing couples in the world there are only a few sucessful ones? I mean about one or two. The others just tolerate their relationships for various reasons be it children etc. I am sorry that I can not draw a lot of hope out of one couple in a 15 min segment of a tv show who claim that this life style is so cool. The rest of us are really just hanging on by a thread. Living with a man who would rather participate in risky behavior at all costs is just not very cool. Most crossdressing couples do not gain the balance that it takes for equal fullfillment of both partners in the relationship because the crossdresser has that " kid in a candy store" attitude instead of the " I am a mature male in an adult relationship which involve sacrifice and commitment" attitude. How about telling it like it really is: my husband spends most of our money on buying makeup, shoes, lingere, wigs plus all of the other guy things that makes him happy so that there is very little money left over for the wife to even go to a movie with at friend (she can't go with her husband because he would prefer to sit around home reading transexual porn and wearing a dress and bra that he just ordered off the internet on his credit card that is about to it's limit. He would rather talk about bra sizes and nail polish and going out in public or how he thinks about being a women every day and would a man find him interesting?) You may now scold me but the reality is not as pretty as a 15 min segment on a TV show. Kitty

[joanlynn28]

Sad to say I watched that hatchet job they call jounalism on Tonight's episode. It does not do us CD/TS'rs any justice. Just any puff peice of TV jounalism. No pun intended.:mad:

[ReginaK]

Sorry to rain on the parade but does anyone else notice that out of all of the crossdressing couples in the world there are only a few sucessful ones?
<snip>


I'm glad someone else sees it that way. All one has to do is come to this forum to get a good dose of the reality that most married crossdressers live. All the books and TV shows in the world make it look like every crossdresser has this happy, accepting wife beside him. Yet on this forum, every other thread is someone hiding from their wife, negotiating with their wife, or leaving their wife.

I know if Oprah did a show about crossdressing, she'd focus on all the negatives. That's just her style, given the way she has portrayed trans people on past shows.

[MsJanessa]

Sorry to rain on the parade but does anyone else notice that out of all of the crossdressing couples in the world there are only a few sucessful ones? I mean about one or two. The others just tolerate their relationships for various reasons be it children etc. I am sorry that I can not draw a lot of hope out of one couple in a 15 min segment of a tv show who claim that this life style is so cool. The rest of us are really just hanging on by a thread. Living with a man who would rather participate in risky behavior at all costs is just not very cool. Most crossdressing couples do not gain the balance that it takes for equal fullfillment of both partners in the relationship because the crossdresser has that " kid in a candy store" attitude instead of the " I am a mature male in an adult relationship which involve sacrifice and commitment" attitude. How about telling it like it really is: my husband spends most of our money on buying makeup, shoes, lingere, wigs plus all of the other guy things that makes him happy so that there is very little money left over for the wife to even go to a movie with at friend (she can't go with her husband because he would prefer to sit around home reading transexual porn and wearing a dress and bra that he just ordered off the internet on his credit card that is about to it's limit. He would rather talk about bra sizes and nail polish and going out in public or how he thinks about being a women every day and would a man find him interesting?) You may now scold me but the reality is not as pretty as a 15 min segment on a TV show. Kitty
youre right that crossdressing just adds another complication into what is for most people a really complicated relationship---some couples seem to fight about everything, x-dressing just gives them another thing to fight over. I hope the situation you've described is not your personal situation--but if it is I would offer the same advice I used to offer my divorce clients in my 18 years of practicing law---sometimes the differences between two people are insurmontable and no amount of counselling or compromise is going to make a happy marriage---either one or usually both of the people will remain miserable. In cases like that divorce is often the best option---best to do it now while you can still be civil to each other rather than later when all you want to do is fight over money, property, children etc.

[Julia Cross]

Kitty, I feel you are as guilty of stereotyping as is everyone else. I don't think EVERY crossdresser spends the family fortune on dressing, look at the pics for example, and I don't think every Cd is into tranny mags or porn. Just like all vices, some of us may go overboard and some know our limits. What about the guys who sit around watching the game and getting piss drunk, or the guys going off to play poker and losing the family car, or the guys who come home from work, bitch about the meal, the kids and why you aren't dressed like a tramp and going down on him? these are stereotypes as well. Crossdressing is a very real segment of society and not one that should be shunned. Moderation is neccessary, as it is in all interests be it model railroads, hockey or crossdressing.

I feel your statement displayed some bitter resentment you must be experiencing, but it is not the norm.

Julia

[Marlena Dahlstrom]

Kittypw GG, first off let me say I'm so sorry if you're having a difficult time of things. I truly hope you're not describing your personal situation. If so, you've got my greatest sympathy. Selfish, inconsiderate behavior is selfish, inconsiderate behavior regardless of how one's dressed. For what it's worth, my observation CD's behavior is typically reflective of their overall behavior. For example, I know a couple where the husband is as self-involved as what you've described in his CDing. But he also couldn't understand why his wife was upset at him for letting their toddler wander off outside.

To be honest, I think it's unrealistic to expect a three-minute segment on a tabloid-ish TV show to explore CDing any great depth (for good or ill). My take was that it was a bit breathless ("what you're about to see may shock you...") but ultimately good in showing that there can be relationships where the CDing isn't problematic. I know people who know the couple and reportedly they're both well-centered people.

I think a lot of the excitement here is because CDing is often portrayed as Jerry Springer-ish dysfunctionality (or worse), so it's nice to see an acknowledgement that that's not the only kind of CDing.

But the ultimate value of something like this episode will be if it helps CDs come out of the closet to their wives -- or better yet helps them disclose their CDing before the relationship gets serious.

[Michelle2008]

For what it is worth....I also know Shirene and Shayla. I went on a Dignity Cruise with them last October. They are truly a lovely couple and a class act.
Maybe they are not the norm when it comes to couples where the man crossdresses but hey...every couple in the world is different. I don't believe there is a norm anymore. It doesn't matter if a couple has a crossdresser among it or not...there are happy and unhappy couples where-ever you look. Every couple has their issues...it doesn't have to be solely crossdressing. Sure, its probably more challenging to find an accepting GG wife but this snipet on "Inside Edition" shows it to be possible and actually happening. To me, thats very encouraging.
I am really sorry some of you don't have accepting GG wives or families. Or some GG's have a hard time accepting their partners as a crossdresser. All I am saying is life is what you make it. I look for the positive in any situation when I can. To me, this was very positive to helping to educate the general public that "we" girls are not freaks. We are just living our life as we choose and we are harmful to no one for crossdressing. Just like anyone else...
Ok, I will get off my soap box. I hope I didn't offend anyone with this. It was not my intent. If anyone is interested and if I can figure out how to paste a pic to this thread...I have a nice pic of me with Shirene and Shayla from last October's Dignity Cruise. I'l look into how to paste pics and post it.

Take Care,
Michelle

[Melanie R]

In our 25+ years in the transgender community, we have met and know MANY couples who have successfully incorporated crossdressing into the marital relationship. Lets describe the successful ones: both husband and wife are in tune with their masculinity and femininity and have found balance. The CD is willing to compromise and does not act like the kid in the candy store. There are realistic boundaries established by both relating to crossdressing. There is communication and both are committed to unconditional love. We also know couples where the husband is now a post op TS and both have stayed in the marriage. This describes Jenny Boylan and wife who were featured on Oprah in a very positve portrayal. Don't think that Oprah will only present the negatives.

In the past ten years there were two one hour shows on NBC and HBO that we worked with the producers and were very successful. One was titled, My Husband Wears My Clothes" and was a one segment on the Leeza Gibbons Show on NBC. This show included two couples and one child as well as two other CD's. Actually Peggy was on the show, but they featured her third book, Crossdressers: And Those WHo Share Their Lives. This show presented both the positives as well as the negatives. The other was titled, The Secret Wardrobe" on HBO. This documentary featured one couple and daughter as well as other CD's. Some of this documentary was filmed at our home in Houston. You may be able to get videos of these shows from NBC or HBO.Some of the Tri-Ess chapters have them in their library. If not we could send you DVD's of the shows at cost.

Hugs,

Melanie

[Melanie R]

For what it is worth....I also know Shirene and Shayla. I went on a Dignity Cruise with them last October. They are truly a lovely couple and a class act.
...I have a nice pic of me with Shirene and Shayla from last October's Dignity Cruise. I'l look into how to paste pics and post it.

Take Care,
Michelle

We think that Michelle is a class act. This 14 night cruise across the Atlantic from Rome to Houston was Michelle's first time out in public. She became the belle of the ball on the ship. Hopefully she as well as Shirene and Shayla will be joining us February 28, 07 when we sail enfemme on the Sapphire Princess from Sydney, Australia to Auckland, New Zealand. That will be the experience of a lifetime. Both Michelle and Shirene and Shayla educated so many of the 1500 other passengers on board the Celebrity Galaxy last October.

Here is Michelle with Shirene and Shayla in the picture below.

Hugs,
\
Melanie

[kittypw GG]

In our 25+ years in the transgender community, we have met and know MANY couples who have successfully incorporated crossdressing into the marital relationship. Lets describe the successful ones: both husband and wife are in tune with their masculinity and femininity and have found balance. The CD is willing to compromise and does not act like the kid in the candy store. There are realistic boundaries established by both relating to crossdressing. There is communication and both are committed to unconditional love. We also know couples where the husband is now a post op TS and both have stayed in the marriage. This describes Jenny Boylan and wife who were featured on Oprah in a very positve portrayal. Don't think that Oprah will only present the negatives.

Melanie,
I would really like to hear more about sucessful couples and how they gained their sucess. I don't know if you have seen any of my posts but I have in the past been very accepting and accomodating with the crossdressing. The more my husband crossdressed the more I began to disapear in the relationship. Most of what the genetic women are saying about their relationships were depicted in what I posted eariler. The sex is also lacking in a lot of situations. This forum could be better served if some of the topics were direct discussions about getting real (as Dr. Phil would say) and gaining the balance and maturity required to have a great relationship where both partners feel that their needs are being met equaly instead of one sacrificing themselves for the other. It is very discouraging when you log on and most of the posts are about sneeking around and deceiving spouses or how high are you heals or do you paint your nails. Your description of a sucessful crossdressing couple is exactly what I would describe but I fear it may just be fantasy. Please help me trust that it is not and help my husband (who also belongs to this forum and reads the posts) see his way to being the best partner he can be within the confines of our marriage. Thanks Kitty

[Michelle2008]

Melanie.....you're the best! Thanks for posting that pic for me. I couldn't figure out how to do it.

Michelle

[Sarahgurl371]

I agree that the whole 3 minutes of coverage on a major TV show, while not earth shattering, was welcommed vs. the Springer version.

As far as accepting spouses. Mine went outside when it came on. Pretty wonderful for a SO who stated she would definatley work on understanding me and this stuff when she came home a month ago.

Kitty, I feel your pain, your anger and resentment. Just know that much the same as all GGs are not alike, niether are we CD/TGs. I believe I have told you before that our situations seem to be reversed.

The message it presents to me is that there is HOPE. And hope is a wonderful thing.

[kwebb]

This society and media trends shift around so quickly. Growing up in the late 70s/early 80s period I used to see plenty talk shows with intelligent, non-senastionalistic themes on CDing that addressed both postive and negative aspects of the behavior. Sally, Donahue, Geraldo all did great shows on this and oft featured excellent informative guests.

Then along came Springer and he set the norm of sensationalism that all the others soon followed. Maybe its time the pendulum swung back again.

[jjjjohanne]

Dr Phil had a couple on in which the man CD'd. They were unmarried and living together. She was oddly tolerant. She did not like it, but I don't think she had the power to stand up to him and say no. She would go out with him enfemme and take walks through town, but did not like going out with him. Odd. My wife would more quickly knock my head off with a frying pan than be forced into anything. (She's a strong willed woman. ...and I love her!) That woman makes me think of those abused women on "Cops" who won't press charges because she "loves him."

Anyhow, the issue on Dr. Phil was the trying to resolve the CD issue versus their engagement to be married. Dr. Phil said that the statistics on crossdressers who try to quit suggest that it is highly unlikely that he would quit. Therefore, she either needed to decide that she would accept it and marry him or that she would not accept it and leave him. Everyone was expecting that Dr. Phil was going to tear into this guy. His reaction was rather clinical. The issue was not his "peculiar" behavior. Instead it was their ability to cope with it.

Joe

[Lindahexi]

I'd love to see the show but don't think we get it here in the UK, even on satellite; if any girls know different please PM me.
Thanks,

Linda.

[MsJanessa]

We also know couples where the husband is now a post op TS and both have stayed in the marriage. This describes Jenny Boylan and wife who were featured on Oprah in a very positve portrayal. Don't think that Oprah will only present the negatives...

Hugs,

Melanie
Point of fact Melanie---Jennifer Boylan, who teaches english at Colby College here in Maine is divorced from her wife---she descibes the breakdown of her marriage and her sex change in her book "She's not There" published after her appearence on Oprah.

[ChristineRenee]

I watched it and thought it was done in a very positive manner. Was nice to see given all the Springer-esque type stuff we usually see on TV about the CD lifestyle!

[Melanie R]

Point of fact Melanie---Jennifer Boylan, who teaches english at Colby College here in Maine is divorced from her wife---she descibes the breakdown of her marriage and her sex change in her book "She's not There" published after her appearence on Oprah.

Point of fact. Jennifer appeared on Oprah the second time with wife last year. Unless there was a divorce in the last 6 months, she is not divorced. I have not spoken with her in a while so will ask her the latest.

Melanie

[Melanie R]

Point of fact Melanie---Jennifer Boylan, who teaches english at Colby College here in Maine is divorced from her wife---she descibes the breakdown of her marriage and her sex change in her book "She's not There" published after her appearence on Oprah.

The following is from a recent interview with Jennifer Boylan on gay.com.

Melanie

"People want Grace (Jennifer's wife) and me to break up and find nice men for the same reasons they are always telling that to women -- that you're never going to be happy until you have a man. And the fact that Grace and I [are] two apparently straight women legally married to each other destabilized people's universes.

People who are so urgently wanting Grace and I to get a divorce don't want us to get a divorce for our sakes, they want us to get a divorce for their sakes. As long as Grace and I are together and happy, it makes their world really strange.

It's very interesting to me that that's the one thing people keeping coming back and saying: "Oh, well, you'll never be happy until you find a man." I want to say, well, that's my business, our business. We'll figure out when we're happy, or what we need to be happy, and then we'll get back to you."

[MsJanessa]

I read an interview of JB in the local newspaper the Bangor Daily News last summer where she talked about dating guys---just assumed she was divorced I guess--- perhaps the BDN got it wrong--wouldn't be the first time. What did they say on Oprah about their relationships with other people?

[Melanie R]

I heard from Jennifer Boylan today. She said that she and Grace (her wife) are together and closer than ever. She will be on Larry King tonight with Felicity Hoffman.

Hugs,

Melanie

[linnea]

Well, that would have been great to watch with my wife, but I just joined this site and the showing has already taken place. I wonder if it will be aired again?
Linnea

[HaleyPink2000]

They are in my TriEss group. Lovely couple. He acts in stage shows. A few Good men was one. She is just the sweetest thing also. I was told the film crew was with them all day. Every place they did go. So at our last TriEss meeting they did show the clip.

Haley:)