First time shopping this morning...

[St. Eve]

Good morning y'all

Putting on panties, tights, and a camisole under my drab this morning for my first trip to goodwill with the intention of buying women's clothes. For the first time in my life, I have worn some item of female clothing that I purchased myself out in to the world some part of each day since Tuesday. Mostly I have experienced the pink fog.

Today, some fear has returned as I imagine pulling clothes off the rack and taking them into the dressing room and then paying at the clerk (I have only purchased through the Walmart's self-check-out isle - so this feels like a BIG step.)

I support myself with the knowledge that I am
1) working on my bucket list - being free to buy and wear clothes that feel right to me, and
2) continue to do experiments in "social absurdity" that break down the rigid social rulses most folks have internalized

I did not want to do it alone...so I thought I would post here. And, as I do, the fear has mixed with joy! Ok, I will say I am excited (equal mixture fear and joy) about this morning.

Wishing to have support from my spouse of 24 years at some point in the future (she has agreed that it is ok for me to begin purchasing my own clothes, but it is DADT at the moment)....knowing I have the support of my family of choice, my therapist, and the folks here....

I will check-in on this thread in the next 24 fours to share how and if it happened!!

Peace
St. Eve

[Lacey New]

Good Luck, I am sure it will go well. I remember the first time I bought a dress and asked to try it on. I was wearing a camisole and panties under drab wear. It was very exciting and the SA was wonderful. It turned out to be a great experience. Have fun and enjoy.

[Marcelle]

Hi Eve,

Good luck and remember you are not doing anything wrong. It is your right to purchase clothing irrespective of gender choice. However, should you get a case of the "anxieties" and do not complete the purchase, don't beat yourself and just take it as a learning experience and try again. Please do let us know how it went.

Cheers

Isha

[Candice June Lee]

I hope it goes well for you. Dont worry about the other folks. And at least put the items against your body. Good will has all different sizes and some are labeled the same size but the manufacturer had a different idea of the size than another. I had boughg 2 pair of pants from goodwill, one a 11 the other a 12. The 12 didnt fit way to small. The 11 did. Lucky my wife could wear the 12.
There are no money back returns at goodwill.

Have a wonderful time and enjoy the trip.

[Belle Cri]

Eve - I gather you are from my original neck of the woods. Do you have a Burlington Coat factory nearby? They are having a great 70 off sale. I went in yesterday and found tons of great tops and separates for about $10 - 20 each. The customers quite literally do not care - I mean the environment is tatty enough, and for all they know, you are shopping for your SO. Just go do it, and if it is a problem locally, the next mega mart is no more than 2 hours by car.

My suggestion for your SO is to go out, do your best, come home bang on gorgeous and present her with the most stunning meal you can possibly dream up and cook. Trust me, DADT will end at the dinner table, always does. Good luck.

[bridget thronton]

Hope all goes well

[Angela Marie]

I remember the first time I tried on a dress. it was in Macy's. God I was soooo nervous. No one said a thing. When you reach your comfort level you will know it.

[St. Eve]

Hi Y'all

Thanks so much for your support. I am back from shopping and riding a big pink cloud / fog.
I had a bit of fear and discomfort...and it really helped that I shop for drab in the same Goodwill store on many Sunday mornings.

I went to the familiar men's section first. For some reason it was more comfortable to be holding men's shirts in my hand as I checked out the dresses, skirts and sleeveless racks.

Honestly, I could have stayed for hours (ok DAYS).....I had dreamed for decades about trying on clothes in a store dressing room with my own en femme intimates and actually being prepared to purchase the clothes!!

Hopefully, I will find time and space and technical skill to post my lovely new LBD with my white tights. I will probably bring them to my therapy session tomorrow and ask if I can change for the session.

Also wishing I had time, space, and courage to buy a wig and go get a make-over while wearing my little black dress......well I know it is in the future, and.....slow, slow, SLOW is the advice I get from EVERYWHERE!!

Balancing my joy and helping me with patience is that I stopped at the grocery store and used their bathroom to remove my tights and cammy, to put regular socks on, men's athletic compression wear over my panties, and separate my new female buys from my new men's buys on my way home.....I did model my new shirts for my SO when I got home. They were nice shirts which we both liked. For now, my little black dress and a couple of other items stay in the car....

What a great day to be alive....shopping in the real world for my own female clothes that I get to take home and wear.....

Peace and blessings to all - 1000 thank you's for the support!!
St. Eve