An update from a normal situation

[Cindy.]

I haven't posted on here since 2011. My last post was after my wife had "the talk" with me. We're still happily married. I won't dent that there is a part of me that's missing. I don't hide things from her and I don't lie to her. Every now and then she'll say a piece of clothing is missing. I always tell her the truth, that I haven't dressed since our talk. She feels bad about her hard limits and she tells me so. I can't deny that things haven't recovered completely since then. Most of the kinky fun things have stopped. Anything that doesn't project me as a masculine man won't happen in the bedroom. Aside from sex, we're very happy. The sex is good for vanilla people, but I'm not vanilla..... Please feel free to respond. I'll probably check back in a few days.

[Krisi]

Some men equate crossdressing and sex. I don't but that's just me.

If your wife says he feels bad about setting "hard" limits, perhaps she is willing to reduce those limits. Talk to her but not in the bedroom. Perhaps she's ready for you to underdress in generic (not pink and frilly) panties. again, not in the bedroom.

[Stephanie47]

I went back and read your post/thread of 2011. Are you really and truly happily married? You confess there is a lot missing that you either enjoy or are compelled to do because that is who you are. You assure your wife that you have not dressed for over four years, yet she is still checking on you. That suggests to me some real controlling behavior. And, she feels badly about it? I don't buy it. I think she is telling you or reminding you that she is continually checking on you. If you 'kicked the habit,' how come there is women's clothing she can still check on when you stated "She'll say a piece of clothing is missing?" Yours or hers? And, bedroom activity is purely vanilla. I don't know what kink or flavor you would like on occasion. You're projecting a situation where she is the happy spouse, and, you're along for the ride.

I don't know if you went to counseling as some suggested in 2011. It really sounds as if you need counseling in trying to deal with the limitations imposed by your wife. I'm not much of betting man (or woman), but, I would not wager any money your wife would be agreeable to counseling to clear her mind of any misconceptions about cross dressing in general, and, your desires in particular.

Frankly, if the need to express yourself as a woman is really intense, she should at least be agreeable to some sort of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" arrangement with mutually acceptance boundaries, such as not leaving the house en femme.

Three decades ago my wife and I had "The Talk." She gave me the cold shoulder for awhile. I could understand her need to sort out what cross dressing was. After all, it was something she did not sign on for. For the last thirty years it has been "Don't Ask, Don't Tell." On occasion she has found a pair of panties or a bra I forgot to return to my draw. She does not go into a tirade. She just tells me she put it on top of the dryer. She know I am still the man she married, but, I have a quirk she is not ready, if ever, to enjoy.

You really need to assess whether you are truly happy with the crumbs she gives you.