Dominant or Submissive ?

[rah]

what is your true personality? are you more dominant or submissive?

i'm the submissive type maybe because of my shyness idk

[Madilyn A.]

In my feminine state of mind I am submissive, and this is where I prefer to spend my time. However, the rest of the time in my male persona I tend to be more dominate. I hate that !

[Michaelasfun]

Subby here.

[Lilblondecutie1407]

I can do both and I agree with Madilyn A: "In my feminine state of mind I am submissive, and this is where I prefer to spend my time. However, the rest of the time in my male persona I tend to be more dominate."

[Rhonda Darling]

If you mean in the BDSM sense, I'm not a player in that league. If you mean in the traditional male/female role sense, then I'm dominate type A aggressive-when-needed male, and a relatively passive/submissive when in full femme -- unless a situation develops needing full on macho. Not a doormat in any way if I need assertive Rhonda to surface. Then it's load and lock and we rock and roll.

[kinky_caitlin]

Im quite submissive and like it that way

[Jaylyn]

I'm the dominate one in my male self. When Jaylyn shows up I am usually still dominate enough to speak my mind but tend to tone it down a whole lot. Wife says I'm a whole lot nicer in Jaylyn mode.

[SFRobin]

As a girl, definitely submissive.

[grace7777]

My personality is geared more to the submissive side. This applies whether I am in male or female mode. I have no desire to be dominant.

[Crissy Kay]

I do tend to be on the sub side when dressed. But then again, that kind of goes with being a maid!

[JoanAz]

I have to mirror what Crissy Kay said, in Female mode definatley Submissive, I male mode not so..
((( HUGGS ))) & Handcuffs ,,,,

[Tracii G]

Never really thought much about that.

[Alice_2014_B]

Both Dom and Sub, whether dressed up or not.
:)

[Jazzy Jaz]

In life I'm assertive, but in the bedroom my partner and I seem to both enjoy the submissive side. In male mode I can be a bit more dominant for her but when dressed we're still working on that and working out the "kinks", or working in I should say.

[katie_barns]

I have always been more of a passive person. Not submissive in the sexual sense.. I will fully admit that my wife is the dominate personality in our relationship. I pretty much the same whether in drab or dressed

[Kate Simmons]

I'm just myself. I can play the sub game but don't cross me or see how really dom I can be. :battingeyelashes::)

[cdinmd206]

I can do both. I was basically a sub for a number of years and gradually started being more of a dom. I fully agree what a good friend (who was my mistress) once told me. You have have to be good sub before you can be a good dom.

[Closeted Kat]

en femme submissive, male more dominant version of submissiveness

[Amy Lynn3]

Most of the time dominate, but I'll let a lady have her way with me any time she wants.

[Lily Catherine]

Both, dependent on the situation. Leading and dominating may indeed be a highly esteemed trait, but knowing how to follow is still necessary at times, and neither of these are beholden to gender in any way. I'm also taking steps towards avoiding being a passive person.

I'm not a BDSM practictioner at any rate, and have an intense dislike for being subjected to forced feminization as part of submission.

[CarlaWestin]

In my feminine state of mind I am submissive, and this is where I prefer to spend my time. However, the rest of the time in my male persona I tend to be more dominate. I hate that !

Ditto! But, I like that. I'm badass in male mode. But as Carla, I just want to be a tool.

[MissTee]

Misty is always in charge. Drab or Dress.

[Laura28]

I have been dominate all my life and in work very dom. Now I would like to be the sub especially when dressed.

[Katey888]

I realise I'm probably missing something here...

But why would anyone want to be the sub...???

250743

:dom:

Katey x

[Sarasometimes]

Katey888
You could be a subway sub Foot Long? A bit of a cheesy reply! LOL

Carla can you add a ditto for me too!

[Zoe B]

Hahaa some good replies here, in life as much as anything else I seem to be a solid switch - basically whichever depending.

[Rakita]

As a person,be male or female, I'm pretty submissive.

[sometimes_miss]

I realise I'm probably missing something here...

But why would anyone want to be the sub...???

Katey x
Well, in our cases, it usually turns out to be a meatball sub.

[Mayo]

Not into the whole BDSM thing at all, but in general I tend to be somewhat more on the passive/receptive side than the active one, so 'sub' in that sense. I can look intimidating if I want to, though.

[Ashley Lyn]

Submissive when being Ashley..:o More on the passive side when Dave..
I guess I like the thought of being 'caught', so being submissive fits..
I would much rather the world would accept me as a guy who loves to wear dresses, and does it well..
On the flip side, I would passionately love to be able to 'pass' enough to be a lady in the outside world..:battingeyelashes:

[steph_2015]

Submissive for sure but I'm that girl hehehehehehe

[Dana44]

I've always been a dominate male. Yet when I'm en femme, I do try to be a woman and that does relate to submissive. On the two married men that I had a relationship with I was definitely submissive as the men wanted it that way and to be as feminine as I could. I'm not that feminine so I had to work at that. I must say that trying to be a full women on those relationships was sensational, I thought.

[chris63]

Definitely submissive. In guy and girl mode both.

[Ally 2112]

When in female mode i am submissive to a point .In male mode i tend to be more straight foward with people

[geek]

Neither.

[TrishaLake]

when dressed submissive and when not dominate.....much like others here

[Kaze_]

Either or.

Depends how I'm feeling.

I'm indefinably submissive only under my own terms though. ;p

[Yoshisaur]

I'm submissive most of the time but can be dominant when no one else wants to take charge.

[Ann WA]

I like to please people, therefore I am submissive in both genders

[JeanW]

as Jean im more passive to be sure in my male side I tend to be more on the take charge " lead" sort of person .. some times too much so maybe that why my wife likes having Jean around .. she has said more then a few times im much less a grumpy old man now

[CD Tammy]

As Tammy, I am submissive. While I have found others that are dominate, my dream is to be helpless.

[Rachel PT]

When dressed...submissive. However, for the right person/situation, I could switch (occasionally).

[Cheryl T]

I suppose in the conventional sense I am submissive. I can easily allow myself to follow the lead of someone else.
In a "date" fantasy I would of course allow the male to make the decisions and lead the way with me happy to follow so I suppose that's the submissive realm I would see myself in.
As for BDSM, of which I am not a participant, were I to partake I would most definitely be the sub.

[STACY B]

Dominant ,, Always Dominant ,, Never Submissive ,,, Not to the point of being an A":"" Hole,, But in charge to a point,, What point you ask ? Until SHE says so,,,lol,,,
aka The Boss,, aka my SO.

[Adriana Moretti]

can I be both ?? Normally I am extremely submissive, in fact I still love that, but I do find occasionally JUST occasionally I like to take my frustrations out on some of the guys I date ....its kinda my new thing

[Brandy Mathews]

Carla,
I think that I am like that too, completely different when dressed and in female mode.
Hugs,
Bree :)

[Alice Torn]

I think tilting toward sub.

[sometimes_miss]

Like most girls, I prefer to be submissive to a benevolent dictator. Women like men to make the plans, and make the decisions, and take the lead in everything, they like to sit back and enjoy the ride. But they get unhappy pretty quick when those plans and decisions aren't what they like. So yeah, I'd like a take control gal in my life, but of course I'd want her to read my mind and lead me on all the adventures I'd like. Just like genuine women want men to read their minds all the time.

[Talyla]

I'm the quiet submissive type. Hate it when I have to make the plans and take charge.

[joanna4]

I'm a switch and that's independent of the gender I'm presenting.

[pamela7]

as a human you have both and neither available. I prefer to match who i am with, i don't like dominating and i don't like submitting. In the wider social context, the world's problems are wrapped up in a bigger "game" of sub and dom, crime and punishment etc. this forum meekly follows those rules for example.

[victoria76]

Both for sure. :)

[Saikotsu]

I'm a switch. I can be dominant or submissive depending on the situation.

[CONSUELO]

Submissive when dressed. Not particularly dominant when in male mode and I avoid groups of loud hyper-masculine men. All of my male friends tend to be quiet types and not aggresive.

[TaminaPurefoy]

Dominant. Definitely. My femme persona is inspired by Artemis from greek mythology, so I follow that line. As a male I mostly spend ny time with women and I have always been a sensitive guy, but when in bed I totally change.

[Anne K]

I live in the grey zone in between dominant and submissive. I find that allowing my SO to steer the direction makes life more interesting for both of us.

[Majella St Gerard]

I'm more dom, but play the sub during play time.

[Dana P]

Carla-love your responses...seem to think the way I do quite a bit. Don't know if really are from Area 51 but hope to meet some day. Not being weird, just that I seem to identify with lots of stuff.

Re OP's question...I 'need' to be dominant at work, and suppose I'm modestly so just in regular drab. I love being feminine and being 'led' a little...

[Debbie Satingirl]

Definitely a submissive girl

[Luciana]

In my natural state I am dominant. But when en-femme I like to think that I am submissive. There are two different persons inside me I think! However, I don't have a double personality. Luciana is (and always was) a fantasy character living inside myself. But as any character, she has her own particular traces!

;)

[Nicole90]

I'm shy and submissive whether dressed or not.

[PamTG]

I used to be very dominate before I realized or came to term with being Transgender and now that I am dealing with these feelings of wanting to be a woman I totally do not ever want to be dominate at all ever again and want to be totally submissive and passive.

[gailwisher]

I enjoy being submissive all the time and treated with sensitive . My wife allows me wear a dress and panties and tells me i look pretty . I enjoy her being in charge even dressed as a male as I am more fem than masculine.

[Marguarite]

OK, so here is a curve ball to most of the replies made to this point. I have been submissive most of my life in drab. I have experienced the BDSM scene, And enjoyed it, made some lifelong friends. I was recently chatting with one our friends, she knows of my desires to express myself enfemme more frequently and openly. She has developed a wish to switch and be more dominant, we chaulked it up to getting older and more experienced. When questioned I said i have no thought of dominating when drab, but have been entertaining thoughts to dominate enfemme. She thought that almost made sense for me.

[Chrissi]

I'm neither. I'm an outgoing person and my personality is the same both as Chrissi or Chris. I guess if you wanted to stereotype I'm a bit of a tomboyish girl and soft sensitive guy. Never really thought of myself as Dominant nor submissive. I take charge when I have to, but it's subtle and gentle and encouraging. At the same time though, I never want to be the leader, or the captain or the general.

[cdheels]

I'm submissive most of the time but can be dominant when no one else wants to take charge.

That's the same with me! :D

[JaytoJillian]

I would prefer to be an equal partner in anything

[Bunty]

I am submissive. Nevertheless, when stressed and unaided by the comfort of cross-dressing, I can be short-tempered at times with my wife. She deserves better, not least because she is kind enough to indulge my cravings for feminisation and being taken anally. :o

[Jennifer B]

Neither dominant or submissive I'm passive. Which aggressive people take advantage of as they see it as a weakness. I then get irritated at myself for never being assertive when I need to stop someone taking advantage of me. I'd rather people just live and let live. (If we are talking about the bedroom then both and in-between.)

[Krististeph]

Submissive, but never "off duty".

Submissive to me does not mean passive, though elements of passivity exist.

[laura.lapinski]

I think I am a little of both, but tend to be more of the dominant type.

[jessicacd43]

Sub sub sub sub

[LilSissyStevie]

At one time I would have said submissive, but that's really the wrong word. What I am is a bottom. As I see it, bottoming is a role and submissiveness is an attitude. I'm constitutionally incapable of being submissive as anyone who has had the misfortune of trying to control me will tell you. I was recently showing my daughter (a school psychologist) my report cards and correspondence from teachers and school admins that I found among my mother's effects. She looked up at me and said, when she could stop laughing, "We call that Oppositional Defiant Disorder!" I said, "Who came up with that? Stalin?"

[Herbie]

I think I'm mostly dominant, but there is a desire to be submissive to my wife. She, however is not dominant and is unable to even "play" a dominate role.

[Sindeycd]

I guess I would say I'm more sub,but I'm nobodys puppet either.

[Mia27]

I am definitely submissive when dressed up. But as a guy I am very dominant. I dont mix my genders or roles at all. They are complete opposites haha.

[ashleyjane15]

In my normal life, I can be very dominant. But since I am Ashley more and more. I find that she is submissive. Which suits my SO just fine.

[JeanetteX]

Definitely submissive....come and get me GG girls!

[MissDanielle]

Submissive. I don't do the BDSM thing at all.

[Nikki Elle]

Dominant as a male, tone downed dominant as female.

[PaulaQ]

I'm a dominant - a top. Oh, I can switch and be a submissive, but you better be pretty freaking strong, and in reality I'll end up running the show anyway.

This surprised me a lot. I was certain I was a submissive - that's what women are supposed to be, right? Well, actually that isn't true at all. I'm a lousy submissive. I can do it for a little while, but it takes effort in my part, and seriously, whoever I'm with better be on their "A" game, or I'll end up topping from the bottom.

[Steph22]

I am definitely submissive.

[Jenniferpl]

Submissive here. Need to be more assertive. Always looking for that middle ground.

[Kirsten1]

How about neither? I am neither very dominate nor really submissive. I am usually easy to get along with.

[Lacy PJs]

Like so many others here have said, I tend to be dominate in male mode and much more passive in fem mode. It is a nice switch; I do find it very relaxing to let her be more in charge. Only problem is that she sometimes has a hard time being "in the driver's seat."

Lacy PJs

[Acastina]

Pretty much submissive. Never had much luck when I tried to initiate relationships, and never really enjoyed the top role in sex. Learned how to do it, just didn't feel it deep down inside. I also tend to be deferential and really try to avoid confrontations or overly assertive behavior. My wife almost always initiates intimacy. So, pretty much submissive.

[Chrissy1966]

Sub when dressed.

[LisaKarenAZ]

Not sure I can classify as either, to be honest. My wife does like to be in control much of the time, and without getting graphic, seems like she prefers the top position more than she does bottom.

I don't have a problem with either, but do tend to side with her preferences.

[Kristy 56]

When I'm dressed, Kristy is submissive ��

[JessieA]

In male mode as the situation calls for. As Jessica submissive unless a strong need arises to be more dominate.

[JosieH]

Always submissive. Dressed or undressed. Unless I'm at work. Then I'm an aggressive beotch. Lol.

- - - Updated - - -

Lol.
I hear that. Lol.

- - - Updated - - -

Definitely submissive.
And, frankly, I hate it when a guy doesn't take charge.
For instance, I had a date tonight.
Nice guy.
Reasonably attractive.
We'd been in communication and decided to meet.
We met for coffee.
So.
Time to get the check.
We both go for our wallets.
I offer to pay and HE LETS ME!
Now, the check was nothing.
And I can certainly pay my own way but, not the way I expected things to go down in a first date, to be honest.
It was a total turn off.
I know I'm wrong on this but I can't help feeling like I wanted him to take charge.
This guy is not going to be aggressive enough for me I think.
I don't want to be liberated! Lol.

[Vala]

Wow it does kins of suprise me that so many of the girls here link their dom/sub state to the way they dress. It's almost like that males have to be dominant and woman submissive. I honestly to not feel 100% confartable about it although I do find it interesting.

I als see that allot of the girls explicitly point out that they not refer to BDSM :) well I don't mind doing the opposite.

90% Dominant
90% Non-monogamist
89% Switch
80% Experimentalist
78% Bondage giver
77% Degradation giver
73% Master/Mistress
.....

[Skirtgirl]

I am a very dominant male, real alpha type, but the opposite as Lesley which feels more natural and takes no effort. Only need to get the frock on and I am a much better person. However, I know I cannot mix the gender role, and would not want to.

[Jennie2]

Whilst en femme (dressed or in femme role) I am, and enjoy being very submissive
Although in male role I can be dominant but I like to be submissive

[crobeson96]

I tried submissive (not dressed) with a girlfriend once, thinking it would be arousing and fresh and new. I totally did not like it. I did not want to relinquish control and found it frightening. My girlfriend sensed my uneasiness and we reverted to our old roles and never tried it again. She loved submitting to me with and without light bondage. Awesome relationship, sorry it didn't work out.

In my current relationship, I am dominant. No problem, never going to change.

When dressing, I go sub. Hard.

[SamanthaP]

Throwing in with dominant homme, submissive femme

[JosieH]

I have always been submissive.
As a little gay boy.
As a CD en femme.
It's just me.
I like it. It makes me feel more girly.
I like it when a guy takes control.
So, I'm a victim of mid-century gender stereotypes I grew up with.
Funny thing is, my mum was independent woman's lib before it was mainstream.