View Full Version : I found crossdressing sucks, but I love amazon
I've had all week alone because my wife was out of town, and I've dressed virtually everyday to some degree (some days 2-3 outfits. :) )
but what I found so frustrating was that I couldn't do anything after dressing. I have to close the curtains and windows, and lock the doors before I do anything. I'm in a prison, but dressed to the nines.
I shaved my legs but had to wait until the neighbors were done mowing their lawns before I brought my nice shiny smooth legs out to the sun.
I can't even sit on the back porch, work in the garden or play with the plants because the neighbors are so close.
I could go dance under the moonlight - but I have a great dane that uses the backyard - no walking barefoot in the dark out there.
but on the Brightside - I took full advantage of amazon prime - got jeans, corset, panty hose (oh my god - those are awesome!), makeup, a nighty and a wig (I couldn't get the wig until tomorrow - so, so, so looking forward to that!!!!! It will be my first)
maybe I overdid the amazon prime with my (fill in the blank, what would you call it? perversion, obsession, hobby, discovery) I felt bad when the USPS guy had to deliver the corset and stockings today. (can you believe they deliver on sunday?)
I also just realized I use .... and () too much in my posts!!
Oh well, off to do the only other thing I can do dressed - clean house.
Stephanie47
09-20-2015, 07:17 PM
I know the pain of an in-home cross dresser. I'd say closeted but my wardrobe is stored in Xerox boxes. The next time you get the opportunity to spend alone time try taking a drive. If your home is too close to others you'll have to wait for the evening. When I felt it was necessary to get out I kept the porch lights off. The dome light in my car burnt out a long time ago, so the interior is not lit when I get in and out. If you live near a safe residential neighborhood get out of the car and go for a stroll. If you shave your legs I have to assume you're wife knows of your cross dressing. Perhaps she would be agreeable to go along for the ride.
I'm a retiree with a working wife. I get a lot of the done (laundry, ironing, vacuuming, dishes, baking, meal preparation) en femme. And, relaxation time with a book or watching television.
Yeah, I thought about taking the dog for a walk. I mean, I can't do it in a dress or nothing, but I can do it in shorts, top sandels, makeup and wig, but is it really worth it? I want to do it, but what will I really gain other than a new desire to go to the next level?
Infused
09-20-2015, 07:42 PM
I still dress in secret and stay inside windows covered. I just stay at home most nights anyway. I would like to attend some sort of cd event dressed up and see what it's like to be out in public and be accepted as a cross dresser. Other than that I have little desire to go out. Also live in a pretty redneck place right now. I think going out with another person would be really helpful for confidence. Wish I had cd friends.
Gabby6790
09-20-2015, 10:00 PM
I have found out from this website sit that how far you enjoyably take it is very different from girl to girl. Personally, I closet dressed in the house on and off for maybe 20 years. Then I started the mild dressing out in the yard late at night or on the patio, then the drives, then the drives to lonely places. For me there seems to be a goal of being out in public and passable. For whatever reason which I don't understand there is something to that. To the point where being fully dressed and park by a convenience store where people can kind of see me just feels amazing.
I think being out of the house makes me more acceptable of this side of me. If I hide in the house I am obviously hiding something "wrong". The more i venture out the more I feel okay with this thing. I remember one of the first times I went out I remember being terrified because I new that their was a DUI checkpoint ahead. Then a month or two later I realized there was a chance I would have to drive through one and I realized I didn't care. A load had been lifted form me simply because I had become more accepting of venturing out.
Personally, I suggest trying to go out if you have never done it. Throw on a pair sweats and zip up hoodie, find a dark park lot. Take them off and just take a drive.
Gabby, that is how I feel except I'm afraid I'd get into an accident. Mom always told me to where clean shorts incase of trouble like that. I visualize myself in the hospital with nothing but a dress. ..... not horrible but the walk of shame leaving the brightly lit hospital would scare me. I think I'm gonna do the dog walk thing next. And you're right. There is, at least in me, to go outside, walk among people or whatnot to feel complete.
Gabby6790
09-20-2015, 10:47 PM
Lena, I totally have thought the same exact thing about the accident situation or having the car breakdown kind of thing. Honestly, I just drive a little more careful. It's the same thing with getting pulled over. It wouldn't be the end of the world but I certainly don't want to push it. I do sometimes make sure I have a simple drab outfit with me if the car did break down or something like that.
OCCarly
09-20-2015, 11:04 PM
I am out to my wife, but she won't let me dress in public or be seen by the neighbors. So like you, I am confined to the house, except that I have a six foot perimeter fence all the way around the property, and a pool, so I can swim in a bikini and putter around the garden in short shorts. And I have a treadmill indoors where I can run in women's running shorts and a sports bra. Still, I feel like renaming myself Rappaccini's Daughter because I am confined to the house and garden.
But I am about to buy a wig, my very first, so I am curious. Where did you get the wig, and are you going to post a review in the fashion and beauty section of the forum after you get it?
GenieGirl
09-20-2015, 11:28 PM
Glad you are enjoying your new discovery. Being a prisoner in your home sucks. Although being yourself is fun even if you have to be locked away to do so. Hopefully one day you are able to be in a situation where you can live openly as yourself :)
docrobbysherry
09-21-2015, 12:20 AM
Lena, and all closet dressers. The first thing u need to realize is that your prisons r self imposed!
After coming out online here 8 years ago, I soon wanted to meet some of the dressers I had gotten to know. I had been dressing in the closet for 10 years and had no desire to go out. Because I couldn't pass then. Or now, for that matter. So, I felt flying across country to the SCC would be completely safe. No one I know would be 3,000 miles away at a T girl convention. It was a life changing event for me!
Since then, I have attended T girl events regularly in other states. And finally, events and even vanilla venues 20 to 50 miles away from where I live. I have a ball meeting other dressers. And, going out in public has gotten to be old hat. Except that I always find going out stressfull. Until I'm in a safe enviornment with other T,s. I'm rarely ever as happy out dressed as IT am at home.
But, my point is, if u want to get out there, u can. U r the only one stopping u!
Samantha2015
09-21-2015, 02:57 AM
Sherry, I try to tell me to stop stopping me. But me won't listen. :eek:
stupid me !!
:battingeyelashes:
Fi-Fi LeFemme
09-21-2015, 03:48 AM
I also stay indoors when dressed. I do like to do the housework when dressed though. Not that I think it's "woman's work" as I do it when not dressed anyway. But it does help make it more enjoyable!
Best not to try doing "manly" jobs in heels though! ;-)
X
Krististeph
09-21-2015, 04:11 AM
I used to go running in the wee hours of the morning. Few people out. Summer was a bit harder, I cannot believe some of the outfits I ran in. Winter better, waved a cop once at 2 am in a snowstorm- he rolled down the window and said something nice- I waved and kept running.
Did a few night bike rides, and CDd a lot while driving long trips in the midwest & central states.
Putting together a motorcycling outfit now- was on my long list of things to try eventually. Next time my wife does an evening shift- i'll try to go out for a nice long ride en femme. Good set of boots and gloves- and either a suit or pants and jacket.
Mmmmm..
Then there is grading papers, writing lecture notes, making up lab project forms... all of which can be done while dressed in anything from a cap sleeved T and yoga pants to a full out gown with a crinoline! :daydreaming:
Paula J
09-21-2015, 05:02 AM
Lena, I have the exact same situation as you. Well, my wife knows about everything. But I have neighbours all around me. I get so frustrated because Saturdays and Sundays are the only days I really get to go completely en femme. But, if I have any errands to do, or yardwork I can't. Even just to walk from the house to the car during daylight hours would be pretty much impossible with all the looky-Lous around here. Also, my parents live not too far away, and sometimes just 'drop by'. If I'm inside, it's fine because I just don't answer the door, but to be caught out in the yard... yikes. But, I'm thinking seriously about going out in the car at night, or going out early in the morning. Maybe I'll go through a drive-through and get a coffee or something. I think I would definitely have to have an emergency bag with a drab outfit and makeup remover to be comfortable lol.
Carly, not to get too far off topic here, I just thought I'd add a little about my wigs. The first few I bought were just cheap Halloween type wigs from a costume shop. They were ok to start. But, I just ordered one of the Melody Susie ones from Amazon. I'm in Canada so I don't know what they cost in the U.S. But I paid around $25 Canadian for it. It is really gorgeous. I don't know how it would compare to a really expensive high quality lace-front wig, but to me it is just beautiful. Very realistic, and comfortable. I'm definitely going to get a couple more from them in different colours and styles.
pamela7
09-21-2015, 06:27 AM
i wonder if the housebound stage is like the chrysalis stage, and one day the butterfly will emerge to the wonder of all around?
CarlaWestin
09-21-2015, 06:48 AM
.............maybe I overdid the amazon prime ............
Oh well, off to do the only other thing I can do dressed - clean house.
You do know that you can get some fabulous sexy maid dresses for house cleaning on amazon, right?
Gabby6790
09-21-2015, 08:06 AM
Sherry, I try to tell me to stop stopping me. But me won't listen. :eek:
stupid me !!
:battingeyelashes:
This made me LOL this morning. Only because it is so true.
I did it! !!! I mean, I did it in a big way.
I drove from Indiana to texas dressed! I didn't have a wig so I tried a $5 wig from Walmart. .....it's in a trash can now.
I walked to the lake at a test stop/park in the open during the day. I pumped gas in shaved legs, shorts, blouse and later in a dress.
It was good. Now I need to work on walk and posture.
And I never realized how comfortable driving in a dress or short shorts is. No binding, smashing sweating etc.
Krisi
09-29-2015, 08:14 AM
Anyone concerned about neighbors finding out about your crossdressing would do well to not leave the house or hang around in their yards or decks dressed. Someone will see you eventually. Guaranteed! As for walking in neighborhoods at night, women do not do this. Someone will ask you who you are and what you are doing or call the police. Not that this is illegal, but if you're trying to hide your dressing, you will probably not want to explain it to a couple police officers with their lights blinking.
Driving or walking where other women normally walk is pretty safe but sneaking out of the house with the lights off (and sneaking back in) will get you seen by someone. You don't know who might be looking out the window and the fact that you're skulking around in the dark will attract attention. If you keep your car in a garage and have dark tinted windows, you could probably get away with it.
So what options are left? Leave your house underdressed and change somewhere where you won't attract attention. It's a royal PITA but I use a shopping center parking lot (in the daytime). Don't park way out at the edge of the lot where there are no other cars, that will be cause for investigation. Park near the other cars but in a way that you can see if anyone is coming. Change back before you head home and be sure to have makeup remover and paper towels or such.
If you are worried about something happening while driving, you have your "boy" clothes to change back into. This won't work for an accident but it will for a breakdown. If you get stopped by the police, "man up" and tell them you are a crossdresser. It's embarrassing but not illegal.
heatherdress
09-29-2015, 09:57 AM
"What if...."
I understand the discovery concern. It is different for everyone and depends upon circumstances, environment and who we individually are. We often "what if...." everything we do in life, even in the privacy of our own home, and live our lives accordingly. Even if alone and safe from discovery, some worry. What if I fall? What if I choke while eating? What if I pass out for some reason? To be totally "safe", as many of us want to be, you have to fully refrain from crossdressing and owning items which may tip someone off, especially if it is a spouse or family member. I strongly believe fear of discovery is why more do not crossdress, even if intrigued to do so.
Each of us, depending on who we are, decide our own behaviors, more specifically, when we crossdress and how we address the "what if...." worries. Most of us figure out our limits and how to maintain our privacy. Although we read of discoveries and close calls here, most who care about privacy can successfully keep their crossdressing discrete or secret, often throughout their lives, or reach a point where they don't care or need to care, and then become more open.
There are many precautions that we take to reduce the fear of discovery and enable us to enjoy crossdressing. Driving is an example. I always prepare an emergency kit, with quick make-up remover wipes, gym clothes and shoes. I realize it will not matter in a significant accident, but I feel the chances are very low and it will not matter how I am dressed if emergency workers have to help me anyway. I had had a flat and found I could still change a flat easily in a few minutes while dressed. I feel that driving offers a great sense of freedom, excitement, adventure and opportunity to get out of the house or hotel room. The "what if...." risks are relatively low if careful and the enjoyment potential is high.
In general, I do encourage those who feel trapped in their homes and hotel rooms to continue to be careful, but try to take small steps to get out, build confidence, find safe environments, find crossdressing groups and activities, and fulfill your dreams. Although there are some discoveries that are shared here that are very painful, I believe there are many more threads which share progress made after discovery and regrets that we have not been more open, experienced more and lived our lives more honestly and fully.
Scarlett Viktoria
09-29-2015, 02:41 PM
I feel your frustration. The houses in my neighborhood are so close I have to close the curtains or keep the lights off except for the TV. But now that my kids get out of bed a lot I'm confined to the bedroom. That's what's been keeping me from dressing as much as I used to. I haven't been out of the house as Scarlett in almost two years (bleh).
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