jamielynn_ca
09-20-2015, 08:04 PM
About 5 months ago I came out to my wife as a transgender, and posted about it here. What's the update and what happened since then? Why did I nearly disappear from this site? We'll I haven't, I still occasionally read but just haven't posted much lately.
So, it's complicated. We've been through ups and downs, have more or less daily communication, but where we are currently is:
- I've joined a trans support group and even been to several individual gender therapy sessions.
- She has joined her own support group, and has given me space to explore who I am.
- This has been really hard on us both, but we're taking it one day at a time. She still doesn't want to see me. We're still married. I hope it stays that way - the married part. :)
So where have I been? Out as Jamie as often as possible (at least twice a week) in the real world instead of just the online world. Support group, dinners after, playing pool at the local T-accepting LGB club. I took our dogs on a walk with two friends I'm out to in broad daylight, no makeup but presenting femme. Shopping, thrift shops and consignments, to the tailor to get some clothes altered. Dinner with some folks from TriEss. A TG pool party (in a bikini!). Had a trans friend visit from out of town while she was here on business, we went to dinner to normal restaurant. All as Jamie. I'm shaved 24x7 legs, arms, pits, wear light nail polish on my toes with flip-flops and shorts all the time. Hair is getting long, and on some outings I've ditched the wig, occasionally fully natural hair, and other times with a pony-tail extension.
The two places I can't be Jamie - home with wife and kids, and on-site work. The work part isn't a problem since I currently contract from home. In other words, just life or really a subset of life, excluding time with kids and wife. Hopefully we'll be able to cross that bridge in the future. The real world has my attention more than the online world, so I'm sorry I haven't participated much lately. I'll check in here and there, and try to post a little more.
So, it's complicated. We've been through ups and downs, have more or less daily communication, but where we are currently is:
- I've joined a trans support group and even been to several individual gender therapy sessions.
- She has joined her own support group, and has given me space to explore who I am.
- This has been really hard on us both, but we're taking it one day at a time. She still doesn't want to see me. We're still married. I hope it stays that way - the married part. :)
So where have I been? Out as Jamie as often as possible (at least twice a week) in the real world instead of just the online world. Support group, dinners after, playing pool at the local T-accepting LGB club. I took our dogs on a walk with two friends I'm out to in broad daylight, no makeup but presenting femme. Shopping, thrift shops and consignments, to the tailor to get some clothes altered. Dinner with some folks from TriEss. A TG pool party (in a bikini!). Had a trans friend visit from out of town while she was here on business, we went to dinner to normal restaurant. All as Jamie. I'm shaved 24x7 legs, arms, pits, wear light nail polish on my toes with flip-flops and shorts all the time. Hair is getting long, and on some outings I've ditched the wig, occasionally fully natural hair, and other times with a pony-tail extension.
The two places I can't be Jamie - home with wife and kids, and on-site work. The work part isn't a problem since I currently contract from home. In other words, just life or really a subset of life, excluding time with kids and wife. Hopefully we'll be able to cross that bridge in the future. The real world has my attention more than the online world, so I'm sorry I haven't participated much lately. I'll check in here and there, and try to post a little more.