Not sure what to do

[prettytoes]

My wife of over 30 years found out about my dressing a little over 3 years ago. She was okay with it...not approving, and certainly not participating, but tolerant because she loves me, and it made me happy.
She is not one to give up her feelings easily, and she bottles things up inside. I can often tell when something is bothering her, but I have stopped asking "what's wrong?" because I always got the same answer..."nothing".
We have been having a rough time in our relationship recently, and we decided to seek counseling. After discussing several issues, the counselor kept saying "it seems like that's not all there is going on". Well, she let loose about my laundry and all the panties and bras. The counselor didn't say much, but I could see that that was really bothering my wife. She had never said anything to me about it.

I have since moved all my skirts, dresses, etc., into a spare bedroom where she won't have to see them every time she goes in the MB closet. I have also put a laundry bag next to the hamper to put my intimates in. I can wash them separately when there's enough...I have enough panties to go for about 2 months without washing! lol

I never knew that it was a problem for her. I wear capris and yoga pants around the house, and I sleep in women's sleepwear (usually PJ's). I shave my legs, and paint my toes.
I knew that she did not want me wearing anything feminine during bedroom playtime...no big deal.

I don't know what else to do. I moved everything so it's not so much in her face, and I keep my intimate laundry separated. I don't overdo it in front of her.
I don't want to lose her, but I don't know if I could give up dressing completely, now that the Jeannie has been left out of the bottle.

[Meghan4now]

I think you are doing what you should. Keep talking, the counseled is a good idea. In the mean time out of site out of mind until some of the issues are identified and resolved.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi PT, My:love:wife of over 50yrs is now DA/DT she knows about everything nothing is hidden she tolerates everything
she just don't want to see me while I'm dressed, I dress about 3:hrs every Morning and a couple Hours a couple
Evenings a week. The best part is that she pierced my ears for me, :daydreaming: Go Figure :daydreaming: .
Now that I'm retired I do all the laundry, That makes washing my pretty things real easy.
I know my boundaries and stay with in them and life is great:hugs:

When the ball is in her court, Just don't try to overwhelm her with this program !

[heatherdress]

You obviously care about your wife's feelings and are trying to do what you can not to upset her. But if she was holding in negative feelings until they came out in your counselling session, maybe there is more or maybe you are not responding in some way that is important to her. Or maybe there is still resentment that you kept your crossdressing from her so long. You probably should have more sessions with your counsellor, to ensure you are fully addressing what might be bothering her. It will also enable you to carefully share how important your crossdressing is to you so that she will better understand your needs. Good luck, Prettytoes. I think you are on the right track.