Surprising bonus from my counsellor !

[Teresa]

Despite my gender counselling being cut short through budget cuts they have gone well. I'm TG and not TS which is basically the question I wanted answering.
I was dreading the last session as I admit I'd developed an affection for my counsellor over the six weeks, it started with her lovely heels and worked up .

Is it the Mel Gibson film, Mind of a woman, that he says the lines, " If I were a woman I'd like to look like you ! " I think most of us have had that feeling at some point.

To distract me from thinking how it would end, I knew I couldn't dress but I decided because of her love of heels I would wear my blue swirl fun pair with 3.5" heels. I knew I was taking a chance because they occupy shared offices, anyway I slipped off my shoes and socks, I was wearing stockings and suspenders under my trousers and walked in stocking feet to her office with the shoes behind my back, she glanced up from her desk to say hello and as she did I produced the shoes from behind my back. She almost fell off her chair laughing, then demanded I put them on and watched me walk to the consulting room down the hall . She asked if she could try them on despite being too big, she was also surprised how relaxed I was knowing what underwear I was wearing, so then we had a conversation about the various merits of stockings and holdups but we both agreed to hate wearing tights.
We then discussed the issue of attending a social group, she thought it would be a good idea , I raised the question of what to wear, she has seen many of my pictures and thought I didn't have a problem, especially with my legs. She has a real thing about them to the point where she showed others in her group and they all made the same comment.
The outcome of this conversation was that she is now going to send me some of her dresses, starting with a cocktail/ ball gown, I did not expect a bonus like this from my counsellor !! We are the same size 12/14 , can't wait !!

I couldn't leave without giving her a bunch of roses and one of my paintings in gratitude , I know it's only a job to her but it meant so much to me !
She asked if she could me a hug, I kissed her on the cheek, I admitted having a soft spot for her and she said the same back.

[pamela7]

That's a lovely story Teresa, with the most important point mentioned only in passing: "TG not TS".
From a professional point of view, I feel she's pushed the boundaries of client-therapist rather close to the edge, with more than a little emotional transference.

[Claire Cook]

Hi Teresa,

You've brought us all a big smile with this one! Just a wonderful story. I have had similar sort of experiences ('tho not with a counselor since I've never been to one) -- GG friends who have given me clothes and wigs that they don't want. It's such an affirmation of friendship and acceptance. Yes roses at the very least are in order!

[Maria 60]

Hm! Sounds like someone has a little kiddy crush with someone. LOL. I could only relate because years ago, I was working at a sales office and told the sales women she had a run on the back of her pantyhose, she turned around and lifted her skirt to see how high the run went and noticed she was wearing stockings. I told her I never actually seen a women in real life wearing stockings. Well she turned around and lifted her skirt and gave me a good view of the stocking tops and told me to enjoy my first. I think she knew I had a weekness for her legs working there for a few weeks she must have noticed me staring her down. She went to the washroom and changed them and came over to me and handed me her stockings with the run and asked me if I wanted a servinere of my first view. I took them and I worked there for about another month and through that time we talked about shoes and women's clothing, she was older but very nice I didn't or wanted to have an affair with her, I just felt comfortable with her and enjoyed our conversations. Sounds like your going threw the same and I have butterflies in my stomach after reading your post remembering how excited and how much I enjoyed talking to her. Thanks for the memories and after reading your post of past it sound good to hear you wright something in the positive. I'm very happy for you.

[Sara Marshall]

Teresa thank you for sharing that great story. Anything that is given to us by a gg emits a very nice feeling of acceptance, but when she has impeccable style that matches your own that is awesome.

[Carole]

Teresa, thank you for sharing that, and I am so relieved that you have got a definitive answer to your initial 'concerns'. It must be a great weight off your mind and maybe (hopefully) even one less stumbling block between you and your spouse.

[CarlaWestin]

Teresa, it is so wonderful that you've had the benefit of counseling to determine your position as TG and not TS. Had you seen a male counselor, you would have possibly arrived at the same conclusion but, without the distraction of having an attractive woman involved with and, accepting of your proclivity.

And, roses are only to be given to one's wife. Trust me on that one.

But, it all sounds very positive and you had fun with it.

So, where do you go from here?

[Nikkilovesdresses]

She isn't very professional, is she...but great that you've made a friend, and excellent that you've gained some additional self-awareness.

I see my therapist tomorrow. She's early-thirties, intelligent, helpful, slim and fit, with gorgeous cheekbones and pretty eyes. I wonder if her appearance is going to prevent her from being an effective therapist for me. It's going to be fun finding out though.

BTW does anyone consider the above to be sexist? If so, is it because you feel I'm objectifying her? My feeling is without attraction the human race would never have made it out of the sea, never mind down from the trees... but I'm interested in how others see me.

[Angie G]

Alsome Teresa I love it when my wife gives me something of hers.Or gets me someting when shopping.:hugs:
Angie

[Jamie Lynn]

VERY cool to hear, Teresa! I bet you'll look great in that gown!

[char GG]

Is she really a certified counsellor? Doesn't sound very professional to me. However, it's nice you had someone to talk to.

[Nancy Sue]

Thank you for the story Teresa, and I am also happy for you getting some of your things sorted out.

And thank you also for your story, Carole. When you told of your co-worker showing you her stockings, then giving them to you as a souvenir, I also got butterflies as I remembered Pam. I worked at a restaurant in junior high and high school, first peeling and slicing potatoes (making French fries), then bussing tables and doing dishes, then working in the fountain, then cooking. This spanned 6-7 years, starting in the 7th grade. When I did dishes I was maybe in 8th grade, and this one waitress, Pam, would come into the dish room, lean back against the walk-in cooler (so she was facing me), put one shoe up on the waist-high stainless steel work table on the outside of my work area - hike up her dress, then pull up her stocking and adjust the garter strap, or rebook it, as needed. Then she always did the other stocking. She took her time doing this, and never rushed, and usually talked to me the whole time. Perhaps she talked to make me look at her as she doing this, or perhaps just to make it more comfortable for me as I was watching her show off. Flutter, flutter goes my heart. Ah, Pam.

[Teresa]

Nikki,Char,
Yes she is well qualified, as I've discovered when she gave me her private consulting details . I guess she's been counselling for a number of years and knows exactly how to handle the situation.
I had a double take when I saw a catalogue showing models wearing bras and one of them was a younger version of her. I couldn't resist cutting it out and asked cheekily if she'd been moonlighting, she thought it was really funny but wasn't so amused by the style and admitted to wearing something more stylish !

I've just received an Email saying items (plural) are being boxed up and sent, looks like I've got to negotiate some new wardrobe space !

[Rhonda Jean]

I think it's not appropriate for her to give you clothes. Might not matter if you never see her (as a counselor) again, but if you do, you've made a connection that could skew everything.

That aside, does that "diagnosis" really matter? You feel what you feel, you need what you need and want what you want. If those things are genuine and well thought out and established, what difference does it make what her opinion is? Your own opinion is the one that matters.