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Nikkilovesdresses
10-03-2015, 04:16 AM
Dear hearts,

Thank you all for bringing so much colour, fun and fascination into the last year. I feel like I belong to a very exclusive and wonderful club, full of warmth, and a cast of characters beyond a screenwriter's wildest dreams.

My crossdressing, though it's happened occasionally since my teens about 40 years ago, suddenly burst into an obsession in July 2014. It burned brightly for a few months, then under the pressure of circumstances, faded away to the extent that I haven't put on make up for many months- I've lost count. I still underdress, as I have my entire adult life; still wear the occasional piece of female clothing about the house, and still buy things- quite recently 3 new wigs, a fishtail Goth skirt, some gorgeous Goth leggings and some divine Cosabella mesh thongs in a range of pretty colours.

But the crossdressing itself has all but stopped. For now. I don't doubt that it will start again, and I don't worry about it. There has never been guilt attached to it for me, or shame, or even that much embarrassment- most of my friends, and my wife, and all my exes, know about it and have seen pictures; a few have seen me dressed. But my wife is uncomfortable about me doing it where we live, and I respect her wishes, so it will probably only happen on my rare visits to the UK.

I've learned a lot about other people, by being here on this forum. It's been an eye-opener for instance to learn how many men do feel ashamed of being a crossdresser. To all of you I quote my favourite forum quote, from one of the members whose constant good sense I admire greatly: in the words of Eleanor Roosevelt, "You wouldn't worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do."

To those of you embarking on relationships: be honest about it from the start. Don't imagine repressing it is going to work long term. If your SO rejects you for it, better now than later, and they weren't the right one for you anyway. Fear of loneliness is a powerful incentive to try to be something you are not, and ultimately the dishonesty will come back and bite you in the ass.

And to all you glorious creatures, with your creaking bone corset stays, your unfeasibly tight undergarments, and your unflagging dedication to supporting retail sales of make up, camouflage and plus-size ladies shoes-

God bless you all.

Nikki

JeanetteX
10-03-2015, 05:14 AM
Beautiful words Nikki...congrats on your 1,000 posts and hope to see a lot more coming in!

Love Jeanette

CarlaWestin
10-03-2015, 05:17 AM
Nikki, congratulations on post 1000. That's wonderful acknowledgement of your contributions to us here. It's sad to hear that your CD'ing is going underground but, as you very well know, things will change and you'll probably have future opportunities to be fabulous. As a famous song writer once said, "Life happens when you're making other plans."

Best to you.

pamela7
10-03-2015, 05:57 AM
lovely to have met you Nikki, i like the humour you bring to our community!

jenniferinsf
10-03-2015, 09:20 AM
nikki
the forum is only as helpful and the members are willing to share..thank you for your post
like others sorry to hear your femme side exploration appears to be stalling out...

Beverley Sims
10-03-2015, 10:26 AM
Nikki,
Dressing is something you can always come back to.
Sometimes you need a rest.

Julie Denier
10-03-2015, 12:37 PM
Congrats on your milestone! ;)

Samantha2015
10-03-2015, 04:07 PM
Congrats on your 1K posts Nikki.

Suzie Petersen
10-04-2015, 11:11 AM
Good job Nikki. 1K posts ... [check!].
Now just imagine how many you would have done if you actually had something clever to say! ;)

I always enjoy reading your posts as they are a wonderful mix of good advise, healthy common sense and a bit of humor thrown in for good measure.

Glad to know you!

Hugs
Suzie

sometimes_miss
10-04-2015, 04:23 PM
Well, glad you're happy to be here, and may you continue to express your ideas here. But as far as the post counts, I've always found that publishing post counts just inspires people to put up a lot of useless drivel into threads, while somehow assigning wisdom to posts that simply isn't there. Way too many people think the more they talk/post, it will make they seem smarter, like it's some kind of mark of superiority.

Victoria Demeanor
10-04-2015, 05:17 PM
Congratulations Nikki on your 1000 mile stone. :Party2:

You certainly didn't disappoint. I have always loved all of your posts, ...well except for maybe #471, you didn't really put your normal effort into that one. Oh and #614, I'm pretty sure you had a few glasses of wine before you wrote that one, but all the rest were definitely worth reading.;)
Glad you are here, one of our sisters and look forward to reading more of your post far into the future.
Love ya
Victoria D

Robin414
10-04-2015, 08:08 PM
Awesome insightful post and congratulations Nikki! The forum IS the members, thank you so much for being here and sharing so much!

Nikkilovesdresses
10-05-2015, 12:44 AM
Thank you all for your kind words.

The point of mentioning the 1,000 posts is that my posting rate has dropped- it's taken me roughly a month to add the last 10, which reflects where I'm at with the dressing. The point of the post itself is to illustrate the arc that I've passed through, a year being a handy milestone. I attach no intrinsic significance to either.