first time out dressed as a female

[Tiff]

Hi everyone, this is a wonderful site, and I havent really posted before. I am transgender, but think this story is better in this section. I have been dressing up since I was about 9 years old. Anyway, I am 50 now, and today I went out en femme for the first time ever. The thing is, I have always been scared of peoples reactions etc before, but today I was just past caring. Anyway I had a bath, shave, early on this morning, and had selected what I wanted to wear last night. I had chosen clothes that would fit in and not attract attention, but that were also feminine and classy. I bought a new coat last week, a brown sort of suede with furry collars and hems and a nice hood, just two buttons on the front ( I fell in love with it as soon as I saw it, and I needed to wear this coat out ). I chose a long purple skirt with two layers to it, just bliss to wear and very good quality. I bought a pair of ladies comfortable brown boots on Sunday, with a flat heel, so I could walk first time without having to think about heels ( I have close to 80 pairs of ladies shoes and heels ) but also the boots fit in and were what other Ladies were wearing. I put a white top on that has subtle glitter effect on it underneath a wool ladies white jumper, that has holes to see through, and this matched great. I chose an over the shoulder brown bag and I am brunette, so I wore a black shoulder length wig with a fringe on it. For make up, because I have practised so much, I know what makes me look the best, which is just skin coloured foundation, some mascara and pink lipstick. I also wore black opaque tights under the skirt. I went to the supermarket, then came back home, went out again around all the shops in town and the Doctors too.. I got no funny looks at all. I passed almost completely, only a couple of people read me all day and they were when I was at a checkout because I need to get my voice just right, and another CD`er who walked past in the townread me immediately lol. I didnt want to come home, it was bliss and I have never felt so happy in my life, it is like a cloud has lifted. The thing is, today, I was so ready to do it, and so past caring that I had no nerves whatsoever, oh, and I walked through my garden a few times as I was in and out, so I await feedback from the neighbours haha. I want to be female so badly, I should not be in man mode ever. The reason I am posting this is if you are new to it and want to go out dressed, prepare for it, practise make up until you are really good at it, that is your best friend, and dont walk out with a cocktail dress on, wear things that blend in and dont draw attention and that are also not scruffy. I am the happiest person in the UK right now. I walked past hundreds of people and no-one even gave me a second look.

[Katey888]

Sounds like a very positive experience Tiff, thanks for sharing it and congratz on those first steps out... :cheer:

Good advice on blending in too, although I would only disagree with one point - you MUST walk out in a cocktail dress if you are going for cocktails... by far my favourite pastime... :heehee:

I'm sure you'll be out again soon...

Katey x

[jenni_xx]

Hi Tiff

Congratulations from another UK cd :) Good for you and I'm really happy you had a great time.

There are so many variables to this I genuinely don't know what is better. That you pass completely, and so of course no one is going to give you a second thought, or that you pass for the majority, and the few that who do "clock" you don't react towards you in any negative way whatsoever. Either scenario will only ever result in giving you more confidence to be yourself and go out in public.

Your comment about not going out shopping in a cocktail dress did give me a chuckle.

[Tiff]

Hi Katey, haha yeah, youve got me thinking about that now hehe. I need to really plan that one to pull it off, and you are right, I must do that. Thats one for in a gang of us and out at night in a bar hehe.

- - - Updated - - -

Hi Jenni, thank you. No one gave me a second look, I just passed. I do a day here and there in a charity shop and get lots of clothes from there, the Ladies are wonderful, anyway, I am going there dressed tomorrow and will do a days work for them and will get some helpful advice from them. One slip up today was that, I wore also false breasts in my bra, a D cup, they are those where the two are seperate and are for masectomies and trans, anyways when I bent down to pick up some boots to try on they slipped out of my bra into my jumper, under my coat, so point learned there, keep the bra straps tighter. I also wore some pads on my bum, those padded panties, and I want more padding as I think they are still light on shaping my bum properly.Cant wait for tomorrow to be me, and not have to pretend to be a man.

[jenni_xx]

Hi Tiff

Your comment about one of your boobs falling out did make me laugh. I wear forms all the time and that's never happened! Go for a bra fitting hun, I created a thread about a few weeks back, and since your in the UK I'd just like to point out that the company that did it (who have a chain of stores throughout the UK) would be more than happy to help you. Send me a PM in this respect (I don't want to post the company name online) x

[Tiff]

Hi Jenni, I will gladly do that, I dont know how to PM in here, I will have to figure it out. Your advice is wonderful ty, or PM me thank you Jenni

[jenni_xx]

I think you might have to have at least 10 posts in order to PM another member. I'm not sure.

I'll send you a PM now, and you're more than welcome Tiff xx

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Just tried, and I can't send you a PM - because of your number of posts. Write a few more posts, or just reply, and it should be ok :)

[Tiff]

Thank you Jenni, I will get some more posts done, a Bra fitting is wonderful advice, thank you so much.

[jenni_xx]

Just remember Tiff, you must take your forms along with you :)

[Tiff]

From what you said, I have sussed out which store it is, and I was in there today too, in fact it was the one where they fell out. I will book an appointment with them soon, next week probably, and I will let you know how I go on. I cant wait to get some new Bras, thank you so much for your advice Jenni, I didnt know about that service. I got the message just then, but a pop up blocker on my software is apparently blocking it out, I will have to find what that is and unblock.

- - - Updated - - -

I have booked an appointment for Friday morning for a Bra fitting. I will be en femme, and take my forms. I shall buy 2 Bras from them.

[MichelleDevon]

Well done Tiff - what fun. I love being out as Michelle and reported a couple of weeks ago on my visit to a little local lingerie shop where I had a bra fitting...a thoroughly enjoyable and rewarding experience. My new bras are a superb fit - and NO danger of my falsies falling out. At least that would not have been visible to people...unlike an experience I had in East in York... I had gone in for a browse and saw another customer trying on a scarf and I thought "that looks a nice design and exactly the right colours for what I am wearing". So I took one and held it against my clothes and the sales assistant and the other customer agreed that it was a good match. OK, I thought I'll buy that. So took it to the counter and the SA ran it through the scanner and I asked her to take off the label so I could wear it straight away instead of the one I had on. So far so good.

Put it on but didn't like the way I had initially tied it so I undid it and lifted it back over my head to start again...but...as I removed it I caught the back of my wig and flicked my hair off onto the counter between us!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was mortified as you can imagine...how to destroy your image in one second! She was fine though - she knew I was a crossdresser anyway and we just shared the funny side of it and laughed while I restored my image, retied the scarf and went on my way feeling a little red-faced!!!

Michelle
xxx

[Tiff]

Hi Michelle, I know thats going to happen to me too at some point lol, I keep thinking about it being windy and it lifting off. Having frequented charity shops for a while, I have ended up spending more time in one and am doing a days work for them a week, Obviously they know I am trans and they have been wonderful, it is like it is nothing out of the ordinary. The reason I say this, is that, I went in today dressed, and spent the day there and it all went as though I wasnt dressed, All the customers came in and out and only one read me as a crossdresser, she was clever. And I had a nice chat with her, she was so nice. So the point to saying all this is arriving, today I was very well dressed and clean and the boss commented later in the afternoon that I cant do proper work while I am scrubbed up. I am doing a day for them on Friday ( after my Bra fitting in town ). and I will have to change into some feminine things but that I can also do a bit of work in without ruining the clothes, so theres a learner for me, and an interesting one. My forms came out twice today when I bent down and when I over reached so that will be corrected on Friday, all being well.I have bought a nice cardigan there which I left there and plan on wearing that over a top, and maybe some Ladies trousers. Going out en femme this week hasnt been a problem at all, I am so pleased. I have to pretend to be a man again for the next two days for work, and I dont like that at all, I need to plan changes to that for in the future.Thank you for the story Michelle.

[Krisi]

Going out in public as a female can be a great feeling. I'm glad it worked out well for you.

[Beverley Sims]

Tiff,
Nice to see you over the first hurdle, now on to bigger things...

Stay safe. :)

[Tiff]

Thank you so much Krisi and Beverley. I have never been so happy in all my life. If I had a female type job I would stay dressed en femme for the rest of my life. I am working on that. I have also become such a very happy and calm person now. When I am in man mode I have really bad moods, its awful. And so, I know I have be myself.

[Tiff]

Hi Jenni, I went for the Bra fitting today. I was very pleased, thank you for helping me. I now know my size, the Ladies were wonderful and the Bra I have now is so comfortable and supporting, I dont have to worry about my Forms coming out now. I shall get more from there. I also did another days work en femme, and one of the learning points was that my Mascara kept transfering onto my face just below my eyes, and I was given some great advice for that, and that was to get waterproof mascara. It may seem simple, but I didnt know why it was doing that. I was read a few times too, but, people were all ok, and no problems at all, I have a renewed faith in humanity now, and am trying to treat everyone else with the kindness that they have shown myself. Also I bumped into my Sister, and, had to explain, she was ok but said was very surprised. She said that I should tell my Parents so they dont hear via neighbours etc, so I said yes, very good idea. And She rang back and said they are ok with it. I remained calm throughout today and enjoyed being me so much. I got a nice pair of Ladies flower pattern pants which I am so pleased with and can wear as work pants, result. And its weekend again :)

[JocelynJames]

Yay! Nice job! I too went out for my first time. I think the waitress where we went was the only one to read me as I just plain couldn't speak- and my worn man hands-whatever. We had fun and will embark again soon. Nice go at it

[Tiff]

Thats good to hear, Jocelyn. We are on the same learning curve. I am finding that each time I do it I am improving slightly here and there. I have been researching Wigs, and this is my next step forward, a decent wig. I want one in the style I have now, but lots better quality. I am so happy right now. I think you are younger than me, and I wish I had done this when I was younger also. I am also very pleased with the Media lately, which is promoting us in a good light, making it a good time for us all to come out and be happy. Wonderful times.