I think my mom has finally accepted this side of me

[cdbrandi]

I have told my mom several times over the years, starting in my mid 20's when I came to accept that this is a part of my life that I will never be able to fully repress, but she has never accepted what I told her. She always went down the "Where did she go wrong?" path, and "What could she have done differently?" and always tried to blame herself. She has seen me dressed a few times, mostly on Halloween, but she has never really seen me as Brandi. Yesterday I sent her the picture of me sitting up, it can be found here (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=252916&d=1446860157&thumb=1), cropped to not show the watermark with a message asking if she knew who it was because I had found it on my computer when cleaning out old picture files. She replied back saying she did not know who it was, and then about 15 minutes later, she sent another message saying she had been looking at the picture trying to figure out who it was and noticed a scar on the check close to where I have scars, and asked if it was me. I told her that yes it was me. And we messaged back and forth a little while. She eventually asked if I had any other photos and told her that I had 2 other photos so far, and she asked me to send them to her so I sent her the full photo of the 1st one, the 2nd photo and the selfie. Her response was this: "You look beautiful as a woman and handsome as a man. Yes. Beautiful. The selfie you took would have been the most difficult for me to recognize as you. They are all beautiful." We messaged back and forth for a while longer, and at one point she said my step-dad did not believe the pictures were of me until she showed him where I said they were. She called a little while later and we talked for about a 1/2 hour. I feel like she has finally accepted that this is a part of me, it is not her fault and that there is nothing she could have done different that would have prevented this. It was a nice feeling to be able to get this out in the open with her finally. She asked how my wife felt about all of this, so I told her that I had told my wife very early on in the relationship and that she was very accepting of it, and I told her that our daughter (who is almost 7) knows that I like to dress up as a girl from time to time and that it is something that does not get talked about outside the house. I am going to end this now because I am starting to ramble!

[Marcelle]

Hi Brandi,

Very nice story and I am glad that your mom seems to be coming around to understanding. Thanks for sharing.

Cheers

Marcelle

[Cheryl_Layton]

Hi Brandi.

This goes to show that most people have a preconceived idea of what a crossdresser looks like and are pleasantly taken aback when they actually see us fully dressed and made up. It's also interesting to hear how your mom failed to see 'you' initially. This is actually quite a common response despite us seeing ourselves (the male) when dressed.

The picture is great and I'm sure it really helped your mom's acceptance of you dressing.

Thanks for sharing. It's nice to hear a positive story.

Cheryl x

[Kayla_K]

What a great story. I am so happy for you!

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Brandi, Your Mother sounds like w wonderful loving person, It's not hard to believe that she
didn't recognize your picture because you are a very lovely young lady.:hugs:

[eire emma]

Very lovely picture Brandi. Your Mum is spot on, beautiful. :-)

[mikayla1964]

You are a very lucky girl..I'm happy that you have found peace with your mom . Now everything will be easier for you and the worrying and stress over that will be gone..

[MissDanielle]

You're a very lucky girl. I just came out to my parents and even though they've never seen me dress, they still don't understand that this is something that we are born with and that it clicks on one day. It's who we are and it's nothing that they did wrong. Having people who love and accept you for who you are is the best thing ever.

[cdbrandi]

it is nice to not have to repress what is a large part of my personality every time I am around my mom. For the most part I present as a male, but I have been wearing forms all the time for the last few years, and I am down to just male shirts, socks and shoes.

[jenniferinsf]

i can imagine the relief and happiness you are feeling and i want to say that she sounds like a great mom...spend a bit more time with her to reassure her you are ok and as you said....it is not her fault

great news

[bridget thronton]

Sounds like a good family

[Karen RHT]

Good to hear it went so well for you Brandi. Perhaps there's hope for us all. Thanks for sharing.


Karen

[Julie Denier]

How wonderful! ;)

[Pat]

Congratulations! You must feel wonderful and relieved (and pretty, I hope -- even your Mom says so. ;) )

[Michelle 78]

Congratulations Brandi:) I am very much in the same boat with my Mother, she has known about me for a year and a half now and still won't even look at a picture of me. I can totally understand your feeling of not having to hide something from her even though she already knows.

Michelle

[melissa247]

Wow!!such a great moment,thank you for sharing it.I have been on the edge of spilling the beans so many times..I am sure she knows as she has seen me dress as a child and it was a constant thing for me to get caught either dressed..partially dressed..or her stumbling upon my lady clothes haphazardly..but we have never spoken of it regardless.It would be nice to have a story like yours to share and experience Brandi..and you do look very lovely in the photos..were you at a photoshoot of some kind or a makeover studio..and your mom sounds like a really great lady..you are very lucky to have people support you.

[cdbrandi]

Thank you! I had a boudoir photo shoot on Friday (that story has it's own thread and more pictures) and the photo is an unedited photo from that. I eventually sent her the other photo that is in the thread about the shoot, and the selfie I used to create my new avatar. Then this morning I sent her this photo:
252976
her reply was: Twins

[melissa247]

wow..what a change..very lovely transformation..very beautiful.you look very much like a woman..very passable..and very much a man on the flip side as well..you my friend have found the balance for sure.

[Leah R.]

This is great so happy for you

[Natasha V]

This thread brought back memories of when I came out to my mom and showed her pics and talked for 20 minutes. The only difference is she decided to put it in a denial part of her mind and has not even questioned it or ask anything else. She simply stated that I needed a phycologist. My heart is content with knowing I'm at peace because I tried.

[Dana44]

Great story Brandi, It is really nice to be accepted by family.

[Stephanie47]

You look lovely as a woman. I'm actually of the opinion you look more feminine as a woman than masculine as a man. Your round face softens any "square/angular" facial features most men have. Your long hair frames your face nicely. I happy for you that your mother seems to be accepting. I think knowing your wife is accepting probably helps, as well as, your child knowing.

[Mark/Rebecca]

It is wonderful that your mother is also your friend. It may be wise to allow her time to process everything.

[Claire Cook]

Hi Brandi,

You are so fortunate to have such an understanding mother. I think you both have some times of discovery ahead. Many of us have not been so lucky .. I wish my mother could have been so.

And the photos of the "twins" are amazing!

[Beverley Sims]

Looks like you jumped a difficult hurdle there, keep it up and you should make a success of life.

[Giselle(Oshawa)]

great story brandi give your mom,wife and daughter a big hug for me sis
btw you look totally passable well done!!

[kittie60]

I for one am very happy for you. Its great that she has accepted you as Brandie
Alot of parents don't. My mother had nothing to dowith me. I hope everything stays well for you.

[cdbrandi]

After I shared the pictures with her, she asked if that was why I had asked what she would have named me i I had been a girl and I said yes. we talked for a while and I told her the name I had picked for my self, Brandi Lynn, and she said something along the lines of she did not think any other name than my birth name would ever sound right attached to me. I told her that was fine, that to her and my wife I would always be __(insert birth name here)___, and to my daughter I would always be dad.