Girl who likes bf who cds

[JustmeBear]

OK...I know some of you know who I am already....So I was wondering a few things.....

I asked my bf if I could one day maybe help him put his makeup on...dress him..etc..He said I think that eventually I would be comfortable enough to have you do that for me. The thought of that is very awesome.

So if he is uncomfortable with that...then that probably explains the reason he doesn't dress "completely" around me

What I don't understand is...Why if you feel that is something someone enjoys and would go out in public...why is it that he would feel uncomfortable around his girl friend?

I don't know how many of you know but I also cd...Only once in awhile not everyday...but I do....He told me that he would like to see what I looked like all decked out...when I go to clubs...so maybe I should use that as a "i'll show you mine if you show me yours"

Would that be ok...to tell him I will dress for him if he dresses for me?

I also wanted to know this...I have a lot of womans stuff that I got as gifts..Infact alot of it is stuff I have never worn before and also have some perfume..I offered these to him...Is that cool?
Also tell me if you think this is stupid...I asked him what I could do to prove that I am ok with his cding.....He always mentions the fact that I haven't left him yet....I think he is afraid of me leaving....

Sometimes I am confused =(

[Stelli]

JMB,

Can you express more clear what are the questions. Before you do it let me put some understandings of mine:


I asked my bf if I could one day maybe help him put his makeup on...dress him..etc..He said I think that eventually I would be comfortable enough to have you do that for me. The thought of that is very awesome.
I have been in several occasions helped to dress. I do not have dilemma with that, but I reckon that someone may have uneasiness knowing you from another role to be helped. Second reason why I sometimes like to dress myself rather to be helped is element of surprise. Many girls do not want to be seen until they are not completely ready to be seen. You can understand that I assume. Third thing is being relaxed and trusty (even playfull) this is when it comes to makeup. I find it strange that someone does my makeup but if I am relaxed and playfull enough I would possibly enjoy that someone does me makeup.


So if he is uncomfortable with that...then that probably explains the reason he doesn't dress "completely" around me
- Does this mean that if you dress something that he is to match with style/looks?
- Does this mean that you wish him dressed from "your" wardrobe?
- (very girlish tought) does this mean that you choose what he is to dress?

There is good play game for this: "dress for photo/video (fasion) session". There are couple of things that can be achieved and create good time: 1. what I find very usefull is to understand how I look seen from aside (how I feel being dressed up is another thing) this can give idea what to wear and what not. 2. It helps him learning appropriate poses. There is some creation to that on both sides and what I find interesting are feelings of exposure. 3. it can relax if it is understood as game and it may lead also to specific makeup and make excellent passtime


I also wanted to know this...I have a lot of womans stuff that I got as gifts..Infact alot of it is stuff I have never worn before and also have some perfume..I offered these to him...Is that cool?
Well if he did not learn as yet, and that may be somewhat nutcracking, he has to learn how to "receive" gifts. I find it cool, and I dearly accept such offers (I was talking to my wife that I need black bra and I got very interesting one as gift, one of my friends offered me to go through her wardrobe too) but this is something that is not builtin - I learned how to receive gifts. Men dressed or not do not find easy to be given something or to accept. But in the same time we all actually crave to understand another side. It takes time to learn ways. If you can be open to each other it can also make good discussion. I have spend sometime with friend of mine explaning why I do this, apart of being better understood I also learn as I speak what is and what is not important.

Please be a bit less cryptic in your writing, give examples. I find this very good subject.

p.s. a tip for you, when you are taking leading role you should not be confused. Your part will be to lead. It takes confidence and determination to do that. If it helps: talk it out, if not: try it out. (Maybe even a little bit of force ?!?)( like it gentle but dertermined )

[JustmeBear]

JMB,

Can you express more clear what are the questions. Before you do it let me put some understandings of mine:


I have been in several occasions helped to dress. I do not have dilemma with that, but I reckon that someone may have uneasiness knowing you from another role to be helped. Second reason why I sometimes like to dress myself rather to be helped is element of surprise. Many girls do not want to be seen until they are not completely ready to be seen. You can understand that I assume. Third thing is being relaxed and trusty (even playfull) this is when it comes to makeup. I find it strange that someone does my makeup but if I am relaxed and playfull enough I would possibly enjoy that someone does me makeup.


- Does this mean that if you dress something that he is to match with style/looks?
- Does this mean that you wish him dressed from "your" wardrobe?
- (very girlish tought) does this mean that you choose what he is to dress?

There is good play game for this: "dress for photo/video (fasion) session". There are couple of things that can be achieved and create good time: 1. what I find very usefull is to understand how I look seen from aside (how I feel being dressed up is another thing) this can give idea what to wear and what not. 2. It helps him learning appropriate poses. There is some creation to that on both sides and what I find interesting are feelings of exposure. 3. it can relax if it is understood as game and it may lead also to specific makeup and make excellent passtime


Well if he did not learn as yet, and that may be somewhat nutcracking, he has to learn how to "receive" gifts. I find it cool, and I dearly accept such offers (I was talking to my wife that I need black bra and I got very interesting one as gift, one of my friends offered me to go through her wardrobe too) but this is something that is not builtin - I learned how to receive gifts. Men dressed or not do not find easy to be given something or to accept. But in the same time we all actually crave to understand another side. It takes time to learn ways. If you can be open to each other it can also make good discussion. I have spend sometime with friend of mine explaning why I do this, apart of being better understood I also learn as I speak what is and what is not important.

Please be a bit less cryptic in your writing, give examples. I find this very good subject.

p.s. a tip for you, when you are taking leading role you should not be confused. Your part will be to lead. It takes confidence and determination to do that. If it helps: talk it out, if not: try it out. (Maybe even a little bit of force ?!?)( like it gentle but dertermined )

I just wanted to dress him in his clothing that he has and I do not mean like everyday....Once in awhile and yes..Even if it was a "game" that would be a turn on...

No his wardrobe is fine..I would assume anyways...I am not wanting him to wear my clothes...I just had a few things that didn't fit and offered them to him...

No I do not choose what he wears.....

I like to get your opinion...you have helped alot....He has shown in the last couple of days..his more fem side and I am enjoying it....

I guess I must be patient and know that when he is comfortable enough with me that he will infact be "himself"

[Jill]

You have a lot of questions about him and what he is thinking. There's only so much we can tell you what you should do. We can only really tell you what to do if we were in his shoes. But we can't really speak for him, we are not in his head. You have a lot of questions about what he is thinking. Why don't you just ask him?

[bjsa]

For one if you never have had anyone who knew u were a cd its hard to trust. A lot goes through your mind when u meet someone wolling to except what u are. A few years ago I to found someone who was willing to except me as who I was. After our 1st date, she told me about her ex-husband, who not only was a cd but also turned gay. Now she knew nothing about my dressing at the time but just wanted me to know about her past. Told me that she really enjoyed being with her husband when he was dressed turned her on . Now even tho i wanted to tell her i couldnt just some thing in my own mind. She showed me pictures of him n friends dressed, but still afriad to say anything. She even would slide her panties on me while she was doing me. Till one day after 2 wks or so i meet her dressed at my door. Just wish i would have never let her go. She was great.

[Stelli]

I just wanted to dress him in his clothing that he has and I do not mean like everyday....Once in awhile and yes..Even if it was a "game" that would be a turn on...

No his wardrobe is fine..I would assume anyways...I am not wanting him to wear my clothes...I just had a few things that didn't fit and offered them to him... No I do not choose what he wears..... I like to get your opinion...you have helped alot....He has shown in the last couple of days.. his more fem side and I am enjoying it....

I guess I must be patient and know that when he is comfortable enough with me that he will infact be "himself"

Seduction is fine game. It is not easy to get always conformtable in uncharted territory. It takes time of exploration and understanding. Patience is required. There is hard way of learning and there is gentle way of learning. I think you may learn a lot about yourself and what it means to be from this or that side of the gender game and archetypes. He is exploring himeslf too and he is learning what it takes. I am glad to hear that my advises have helped. Enjoy while it lasts.

I envy you two, I wish that I have partner with your aproach.