Internet dating as a crossdresser.

[goodnhose]

Wanted to know if any of you have experienced dating on the internet presenting as a crossdresser? I'm not talking about CD dating sites but hetro sites like speeddate.com. I have been on several over the past couple months as Seana and have had some good and some bad responses. Most women are just curious about why you crossdress but some can say some pretty nasty things which was expected presenting as a crossdresser. To be clear, I let it be known in my profile that I was CD and that I was there just to strike up conversation about the topic. The really good part is that I found a GG that doesn't judge me soley as a crossdresser she has accepted it. We have been corresponding for a month now, first by IM on the dating site then personal email and now texting daily. She lives in my local area and want's to meet me........I'm so nervous about this............I mean something I've dreamed of my whole life could actually happen and I am holding back. She has seen my true guy pictures so she knows what I look like no mystery there. OMG! a real GG who knows I'm a crossdresser and wants to meet. Well If it happens and we meet I will let you all know how it goes but just having made it this far is still almost unreal to me. Maybe some of you have had this happen? or others have thought about it but never tried just know that it is possible, I mean I never thought I would get even this far. Anyone have stories about this topic?:battingeyelashes:

Seana

[IamWren]

I've been married for several years in fact, way before I started dressing, so I don't have any experience on dating sites fully disclosing as a CDer. I'm curious if she's seen pictures of you dressed. If so, what were her thoughts?

Good luck with meeting her. Sounds like you HAVE gotten hold of almost every CDers dream.

Hugs,
Sayyidah 'Sue'

[Robin414]

Oh yes, it can and does happen Seana!

[Gretchen_To_Be]

Hi Seana

How exciting is that? Good for you for being up front about it. I was too chicken, and waited almost 12 years to tell my wife. I was fortunate that she was supportive, but if I had to do it all over again I would have told her. I really hope this works out for you! Please share updates!

BTW, has she seen pics of the real (girl) you?

Gretchen

[goodnhose]

Yes, She met me as Seana and I have shared pictures with her of me as a guy. Texting with her right now about Sofia Vergara and Joe Manganiello's wedding. OMG! is she stunning and her dress!!!!

[Tracii G]

I was on Hot Or Not as a CD 5 or 6 years ago and did end up meeting a few local GG's and one guy that I dated.
Pretty normal actually after the small talk getting to know each other.
Meet up with her and have fun and yes give us a full report on the date.

[josrphine]

HI Seana, I don't know were you live but I am in Florida. As a senior citizen I have found that most of the women here will go out with any type of man . I was always up front that I was a C D an had a few good dates. Well I went home to Connecticut to finish up on my divorce . There I met my present wife. On our first date we were going to go out but the weather was bad. So she said come to my home I will fix dinner, I said I had just cooked up a pot of Venison chill an I could bring it with a bottle of wine. Well as we ate an exchanged story I told her that I was a C D. Her answer was so what I lived in Greenage Village N Y . Well needless to say I found out later that she locked me in for 4 days an nights. I did dress for her an she loved it so much I have never stopped. Here in Florida were we live now we go out as sisters as we are the same size in cloths an shoes. We have been to Key West an I was a women for a week an the same to P Town in Mass. They are out there an I have found out that most senior women like having a boy friend an girl friend. JO

[transfeminate]

As someone who has a very understanding wife, this is not my thing but I find it very encouraging that there are a lot more tolerant people out there than we ,not often enough, realize.
Can't see how your date can fail Seana, not with those looks

[docrobbysherry]

I have done a good bit of internet dating. Not as a CD. But, I've had a very difficult time on first meetings.

I keep telling myself that it will probably come to nothing. So, just be myself and have fun with her!

Yet, I continually find myself either thinking, "Nope, this can never work". Or worse, "Wow, she's alrite. This could become something!"

I can't seem to meet them without judging. And, I can see from their attitudes and eyes, they mostly r doing the same. Expectations and judgements. Beware of these romance killers!:doh:

[sometimes_miss]

Yes, She met me as Seana and I have shared pictures with her of me as a guy.
I'm confused; have you met her in real life already? I thought it was just online?

In the event I've gotten it wrong, I'm thrilled for you. If not, then be very careful meeting anyone that you only know online. Make it a public place, where you can be safe. There have been incidents where this type of thing was just a ruse to get a crossdresser out somewhere and then he was assaulted by a group and either got killed or wound up in the hospital.

BE CAREFUL. This has happened in public restaurant parking lots. So make sure you have a safe exit strategy.

Now, FWIW;
I started putting up personal ads online back when AOL dating started. I put up two ads, both identical other than mentioning that I crossdress in one of them. The 'normal' one generated lots of hits; in the beginning around 50 a day. that of course tapered off, but as a single divorced male who had a good job, am tall and decent looking, there was plenty of interest. In the ad that mentioned crossdressing? NOTHING. ZIP. NADA. The only responses i got were from men, prostitutes, oh and ONE lady from the other side of the planet, who I don't even know if she was a genuine lady. Remember, this was when AOL had 20,000,000 active members. Since then, I've had ads up on plenty of fish, match, OKCupid, loveaccess, and a couple of others. Responses are pretty much limited to men looking for crossdressers, numerous call girls and prostitutes, and of course, a rare female who turns out to be nuts (yes, I know that as a crossdresser most females also think I'M nuts, but these women are really not anyone that any guy I know would want to date). I have met several of these women, and dated few of them, basically to find out that they weren't really into dating a crossdresser but were willing to put up with it just to date a guy, any guy, as it became pretty clear why no one else would EVER want to date them. There is a dateacrossdresser dot com dating site, but it's inhabited almost 100% by men. The crossdressers there all list themselves as female, so if you're looking for a GG you're going to have to sift through tens of thousands of CD'ers to find them, and there are few. Once you join, you will occasionally get a message from one of the supposed GG's, but in order to respond, you have to become a paying member. Once you pay, and respond, one of a few things happens: 1. The woman who wrote to you doesn't respond to your message, 2. She responds but is no longer interested, 3. She denies ever writing to you; basically, it appears that many supposed GG's there are just shill accounts to get suckers to pay for membership. However, if you wish to date guys, there are plenty to choose from.
The best advice I've gotten was from someone on here, who suggested going out with gay female friends to their bars and seeing perhaps if there was any interest from perhaps bi leaning women who might be interested in girls, but perhaps not ready to switch which genitals she likes. But that also requires outing myself a bit, something I wasn't really ready for.
Best of luck in the dating world. and be careful out there. Even if you're a martial arts expert, you can't stop what you don't see coming.

[goodnhose]

Thanks ladies for your stories, advice and safety concerns. To clarify This woman and I have not met in person, we have taken it slowly from IM on the dating site to personal email and now texting daily. Last night we texted each other for nearly 2 hours about Sofia Vargara's wedding and Thanksgiving plans. Next step will be a phone call a bit nervous about this but have hope too. We converse about everyday happenings but she met me online as Seana so no secret there. As for meeting her if that happens it would be in a very public place and as the the guy I am not Seana. I have discussed my CD concerns with her and she has been very accepting so I will go forward in caution but with hope. If this ends in just friendship I will be happy just having a real GG in life to talk with and share some thoughts with. But if it all goes south tomorrow I get that also.
Se

[sherri]

I'll admit it's been a long time since I tried, but when I did try to post a CD profile on straight dating sites I was refused by the site admins. Just sayin.

[Sky]

I date men as a cd through the kind of web sites which cater to all orientations (I'm not into the bar scene). In principle there are many men who look interested in dating a cd, but in practice most of them are posers or get cold feet before actually meeting. So the actual success ratio (real life dates vs. prospective dates) is painfully low. You can find quite a few connections in these men's behavior with our very own world.

I'm not particularly interested in meeting ggs. As for meeting other cds for friendship, that was the main reason I rejoined this site, but no success so far. Any Chicago girl willing to help a lonely soul? :hugs:

[latex-steph]

I met my wife online with her knowing about dressing before we every met. I gotta say, it was really embarrassing to dress in front of her the first time even with her encouraging me to do it. She was very accepting and helped me with makeup but it took a while before I could relax because it was something I held so close to the chest for so long. Hope it works out!

[kittie60]

Yes I have used dating sites looking for friendship. I have quite a few good friends from that and I have been out with a few guys also. I told them upfront for me it isn't sexual, and they were ok with that. Still others were quite different and told them to leave. You never know what you may be getting into. Just be safe.

[hotxbuns]

I have had several dates on RSVP using a photo of me dressed including my now wife!

[sometimes_miss]

Yes I have used dating sites looking for friendship.
That's different. Dating isn't about looking for 'just friends'. Of course, unfortunately it occasionally winds up that way.

[Stephanie Julianna]

I hope this lady is very secure in her femininty. I have seen your pics and you are what most people would call a "knockout." Not to many women I know can handle a genetic male looking better than them. I had a GG friend who loved to hang out with me dressed. She was a bit overweight and I think she lived vicariously through my girl self. She was always fascinated with the whole process of seeing someone go from male to female. We were just friends and she liked the drag scene and people in NYC. I know my wife would be intimidated since like many women their is some competition when dressing. Let us know how it goes. I'm curious how she will react when she sees you in the flesh.

[goodnhose]

Just wanted to tell everyone that the girl I met while on a dating site en fem has turned out well so far. We started communicating on the site then email, text, phone and now we will be going out on our 3rd date. I can still hardly believe that this has come true. I'm sure, like many here it's been a dream for so long and like me just didn't think it possible but it can happen. I had to learn how to get around the picture rules(plus some luck) on the site and once I did I got a lot of curiosity hits and some very interested girls but all lived too far away. Then she said hello and the rest is history up to this point. In case your wondering 95% of our conversation is just everyday stuff then she will pop in with a question like what perfume do you like to wear and my senses go flying. Hang in there it can happen.

[Wen4cd]

You sound like you are reaping one of the big benefits of being honest in your relationship. You will never have to worry about sneaking, hiding, lying, etc. That's a decent groundwork for a CD in a relationship. Good for you!

[Brandy Mathews]

Yes,
It is so nice Seana, good luck to you hun. I had a girlfriend years ago that I had so much fun with. Shopping, doing each others makeup, nails. Shopping together, was so amazing. I miss her so bad. Sounds like you got a good one there, good luck with it again.
Hugs,
Bree:)

[S. Lisa Smith]

I am glad things are working out!!! Let us know how everything goes!!

[Tracii G]

Soo happy for you I wish you both all the best.:)

[tictac43]

that sounds great!!!! Good luck :)

[irene9999]

I've met GGs on chat rooms who are into men who CD, they were too far away so we just sort of chatted and traded pics but didn't lead to anything. If you found one of these women congrats!

[bstewart9901]

Wow Seana....I really enjoyed reading this thread with all your updates. I look forward to reading more. Please make sure to keep us nosey peeps in the loop! Good luck!

[goodnhose]

Hi ladies, tonight my date took me to a quaint little wine store. Not knowing anything about wine she gave me a wine 101 course which was awesome and confusing at the same time so many types / varieties to choose from. She's going to make a sweet / fruity concoction that you add to red Sangria and mix it all up with a little Ginger Ale WOW! what a great refreshing drink. We ended up eating at the Olive Garden for dinner and chatted about everyday things including my crossdressing. Ended the date with a kiss and a nice hug. Things are feeling more comfortable and progressing nicely.