Can Somebody Help

[Sue Too]

Not a big deal but some time ago I saw two types of sexual orientation described. The first described how a person felt internally. (ex--I feel like a woman) The second described the gender that sexually aroused a person. Lets not make this any more complicated than necessary. It seems to me the description I saw did the job in about twenty words or less.

Just a bit of an update I'm pretty much of a lurker. I've been on HRT for almost two years and I'm just about ready to go full time. I've had some family issues that confused my path but those are just about a thing of the past. I love the forum and I must say that I enjoy the differing opinions that have taught me so much.

Merry Christmas to all of you.

Susan in Phoenix

[Jennifer-GWN]

Susan... But but but it can't be THAT simple... Surely... We can't allow it... it's just not permitted... Hahhaaha

And a happy holidays to you!!!! Humbug... Thinking its that simple.

Cheers... Jennifer

[ReineD]

First, I need to correct a small thing. The gender one identifies with internally (your example, I feel like a woman) is not a type of sexual orientation, it is gender identity.

Basically, gender identity is separate from sexual orientation for some people. So take any gender identity from column A, and match it with any sexual orientation in column B. This will give you 15 different combinations:

Column A - Gender Identity, regardless of birth-sex:

I identify as a female.
I identify as a male.
I am gender fluid.**


Column B - Sexual Orientation:

I am attracted to males
I am attracted to females
I am attracted to both
I am attracted to none
I have alternate sexual attractions


** You can replace "gender fluid" with any other term that is not purely male or female, such as genderqueer, agender, pangender, polygender, bigender, etc.

[Amanda M]

I thank that's one question answered! Thanks Reine.

[Kate T]

..... gender identity is separate from sexual orientation for some people.......
It might possibly be more correct for the above to say for ALL people. Whilst there is no doubt that a majority of female identified individuals are attracted to males and vice versa that does not mean that they are linked per se. Take a group of 100 women that consists of 96 male attracted women and 4 female attracted women. The above statement implies that for the 4 women who are attracted to females that their gender identity is separate from their sexual orientation whereas for the other 96 women it is not.
Now take those same 4 women and put them in a group of 100 women where 96 are attracted to females and 4 are attracted to males. Ignoring our social constructs and looking merely at that group we could just as easily say that those 4 women who previously had a sexual orientation separate from their gender identity NOW actually have a sexual orientation linked with their gender identity within this group.
Now the above is really just all a matter of perspective (and possibly pedantry) EXCEPT for the fact that if we say sexual orientation is separate from gender identity for ALL people then there are no implied abnormal relationships. Relationships just are what they are, male / male, male / female, female / female, sexual or non sexual. It would be a nice world if we could all accept and acknowledge that I think.

I know Reine, I am going to search far and wide for my Utopia but I can always dream :)

[ReineD]

Whilst there is no doubt that a majority of female identified individuals are attracted to males and vice versa ...

That's what I meant. I was speaking from an bio-evolutionary standpoint. To be sure, they aren't linked for same-sex attracted people.



ALL people then there are no implied abnormal relationships. Relationships just are what they are, male / male, male / female, female / female, sexual or non sexual. It would be a nice world if we could all accept and acknowledge that I think.

Lest we get into a discussion of definitions, I associate "abnormal" with something that is undesirable, and I certainly don't view gender dysphoria as being abnormal or undesirable. It's just not statistically significant, hence the word "some". I read a blog once - a post-op MtF was discussing how to describe herself attracted to a gender fluid CDer. I guess the simplest way would be, "I'm a woman attracted to a gender-fluid person".