What would you have done

[Shelly Preston]

This is a restroom story with a twist.

A few days ago I was in Garden Centre which had one cubicle for male and on for females.

As I went to use the female one there was a problem, It was occupied. so I just waited.

All was calm until another lady arrived. She noticed the male cubicle was empty as she went to use it she suddenly stopped.

She was so polite she offered to let me is the male cubicle as I had been waiting before she arrived.

Decision time what do you do ???

Oh has anyone thoughts on what I did ?

[Angie G]

If you could wait then lady's first.:hugs:
Angie

[Robin414]

Wow, tough one Shelly, I've never been in that situation personally but if I were, I think honestly...I'd be be a chic who needed to go and take what's available!

[docrobbysherry]

Since u were waiting to use the ladies room I assume that is what u continued to do. Altho, u didn't mention the most important details; if u were in a hurry and how badly u needed to go!

[Jackie7]

I've been in a similar situation and would do again what I did then, and what the other lady did too: use the vacant cube, whatever sign is on the door, and give a broad wink to anybody who looks at you sideways.

[Rachelakld]

Cubicals are cubicals, they are pretty much the same.
Having said that, I'ld use the ladies as it's more likely to have a mirror to check my makeup - just kidding, I'ld use which ever.

[reb.femme]

As Violet Gray in one of her vlogs once told us, bacon is available in the ladies toilets. Reason enough to use the ladies.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MmQ3re32anM&list=UUOQUkSoVPZkfsXtMWLoZV5Q&index=4 at mins 4:25.

It was a tough call but I would have let her go. Real ladies only use the ladies..blah blah! :heehee:

Becky

[pamela7]

sounds like the other lady was in urgent need so "no, please you go first".

[Teresa]

Shelly,
The thing to do was offer her the choice of using the Gents before you , if she declined ask if she minded that you go instead .

I was on a visit to Lisbon and went to use the toilets, like you there was a cubicle for each gender, an American lady was sitting waiting for her husband but the female one was free. She said her husband wasn't feeling too good and may be some time, she said go ahead and use the ladies, I couldn't wait a while ago so I used the Gents . So I used the Ladies, she was still waiting when I left so I thanked her, she replied what the heck it all comes and goes the same way !!

[KrissyP]

I was worried about having to use the ladies room at the movies the other day if I went dressed. Did not want to get in trouble so I just went dressed as male instead. Sounds like I should not have worried.

[AngelaYVR]

Those make/female signs are there purely for legal reasons. If they are single occupant then it doesn't matter a jot which one anybody uses. I have used both dressed both ways.

[Pumped]

If I really got to go and it is a single stall restroom with a door lock, I will use which ever one is open. The other day I was waiting for my turn, I don't dress, both the ladies and men's were locked and I was not in a great hurry. A minute later the men's door opened and a attractive woman stepped out. I gave her some light hearted B.S. about being in the wrong one and she just laughed it off and said, "when you gotta go!". We both had a laugh and she went on her way. I don't believe most people would care.

[Cassandra*]

Hi Shelly. For me it goes with a saying I have " whats constitutes mens and womans underware? Whos wearing them at the time! So If I was in the situation its an open door policy. Open door and Im using it. Have a merry Christmas and a happy new year.🎁

[Jane G]

When you got a go you gota go. Other wise lady's first. :heehee:

[Shelly Preston]

Thank you for the replies.

Due to the fact I was in no great need or hurry, I chose to let lady who seemed in more need use the male toilet.

I waited for the female toilet to become vacant. :)


Interesting thoughts on the signs . Hospitals here have dual signs for single cubicle facilities.

[Kim_Bitzflick]

I think I would have waited for the ladies room. Most men's public rooms are disgusting. I hate using them while in male mode.


I was worried about having to use the ladies room at the movies the other day if I went dressed. Did not want to get in trouble so I just went dressed as male instead. Sounds like I should not have worried.

I go to the movies at least once a month dressed pretty. I use the ladies room when I'm presenting female. The worst problem I had was that as I was walking out, some paper stuck to my shoe that I didn't notice. A teenage girl nicely called it to my attention, I removed it and went on my way.

[LindaAnne]

I agree with Kim, men's restrooms are disgusting, yikes! Plus since I wear panties all the time now, even when in male mode, I prefer to sit when going and the ladies rooms are so much cleaner! Only problem is until I finally get up the nerve to go out fully dressed in public, I can only use the 1-person ladies rooms, but I don't think twice about it.

[Sarah Beth]

If you had not urgent need then let the other person go ahead. Which is what you did. Since I don't go out fully dressed there really isn't issue with that for me so I can't really say for sure. I do know that I worked with a woman a few years ago and for our work we had to travel a lot and she knew where every Starbucks along the road was and as a result we spent a lot of time stopping for her to use restrooms. On more than one occasions the ladies was occupied and was required to stand guard outside of a men's room while she went it.

On a side note, it was mentioned her how disgusting men's room's were. If you are someplace where the men's room is that disgusting then don't you have to wonder about sanitary the rest of the place of is. I know its hard to keep any restroom clean particularly in some types of businesses. Years ago I worked for a plumbing company and we had service contracts with some companies and among them were several bars. Trust me the morning after the night before those ladies rooms in those bars could be just as disgusting as the men's were.

[Mollyanne]

This is a "No Brainer", when you gotta go, you gotta go!!!!! A cubicle is a cubicle no matter how you slice it.

Molly

[Cheryl T]

Apparently she deferred to you because you were first, not because she thought you were something else.
If you gotta go, you gotta go and I would use either in that case, but if it wasn't dire I would just thank her and wait for the ladies room.

[Pumped]

On a side note, it was mentioned her how disgusting men's room's were. If you are someplace where the men's room is that disgusting then don't you have to wonder about sanitary the rest of the place of is. I know its hard to keep any restroom clean particularly in some types of businesses. Years ago I worked for a plumbing company and we had service contracts with some companies and among them were several bars. Trust me the morning after the night before those ladies rooms in those bars could be just as disgusting as the men's were.

LOL! I used to sell cleaning supplies and equipment and many times I have heard from people that work for cleaning companies that the woman's restroom can be much worse than men's, especially in bars.

When I was in high school I worked at a gas station. At night when we cleaned and locked up we were always wondering what we would find in the woman's restroom, it was often worse than a mess. You have not lived until you get to clean feminine hygiene products that are "glued" to the wall. The men's was fairly predictable, just some splatter around the urinal.

[Launa]

I usually use the mens to begin with so its a non issue for me only its a problem for the men that have to share with me. I would use it in a second flat.

[PretzelGirl]

Interesting thoughts on the signs . Hospitals here have dual signs for single cubicle facilities.

I had to research this once and the basic summary is that there is an International Builders Code that covers this among other things. Every level of government can amend it as they see fit. Where I am at, there are no amendments from the top level IBC document down to the local government. The IBC basically says that two or more fixtures require gendering of the restroom. Otherwise, it doesn't matter. I can speak to local laws, but I have heard of none in my area/state that require gendering of single stall restrooms and in fact, it is swinging the other way where places are openly supporting Gender Neutral restroom marking for single stalls.

Thinking about it, pre-transition, I probably would have waited. Recently I went on a tour and a number of us ladies stopped at the restrooms. No men and one each of single stalls. I broke the line and used the guys. The bladder speaks loudly!

[debstar]

M/f cubicles who cares?

Let me put it this way. Have you ever been desperate and used the disabled loo worried that when you leave a disabled person is going to give you a hard time?

[Stephanie47]

I guess this is a new one on me. I don't think I live a sheltered life. However, I've never encountered a single stall restroom that specified a sex, i.e., men or women or the universal signs of the sexes. I think it was Sue who made some sense of it. If there's a urinal in the restroom I guess that would make it a men's room. Just today I was in a store with three doors lined up; men's women's and family. I suspect the family room has both a urinal and a toilet. When I go to a commercial store or an office with a bathroom for the store's customers it always has just a toilet.

If the restroom is for one person at a time, then I'd say first come first serve as long as there was no great urgency shown by another user. I've encountered over the years many times when someone could not wait and just announced herself as "woman on board." Or a man asking if there was anyone using the restroom.

[TrishaTX]

If I had to go...I would just go!