Search for happiness thru other means?

[JanePeterson]

Happy weekend!

Just thinking back on my past here and am curious if you all experienced anything similar...

I have always been the type to take things to the extreme, especially hobbies etc. I get an activity or an idea in my head, and I can't let it go, I pursue it as hard as I can, then shortly find that I'm really not into it as much as I thought.

I've done this since college, and a few things I've stuck with and enjoy, but others I've totally flamed out. Examples: Rock climbing (still enjoy) Mountaineering (idea is great, too expensive in reality), was into cycling then recumbent bicycles (spent WAY to much money on that one)...

A big source of my doubts right now is a recognition of this behavior in myself. They key difference being that CDing has been with me my whole life, and not engaging in a hobby has never given me panic attacks.

We're those episodes of abundant enthusiasm some unconscious manifestation of GD and unhappiness? Or am I just a run of the mill flake-o who can't make up their mind?

Just curious if any of you had a similar pattern before understanding your trans-ness

Thanks!!!

Jane

[Kate T]

Honestly I think they are completely unrelated. There are plenty of cisgendered people out there who behave in a similar manner.

I think it is probably more a symptom of an active mind with no limitations on commitment, either time or financial. Once in a long term relationship / with a family you start to plan and review your choices a lot more and require a strong need / desire in order to commit time or money to something extensively.

[MissDanielle]

I have my binges that come and go...but the unhappiness was always there to some extent.

[Cindy J Angel]

Yes all The time 57 y there's been all kinds of things I have done throughout my life. But this is what keeps coming back. This is hard. This is not a hobby. that's for sure. No one I know would put them self to this.

[JanePeterson]

No one I know would put them self to this.

That's a great point to remember... All the other things l've tried were mostly accepted by society even if a little fringe.

I think some of my family are hoping that this is like those other things... Want to believe that this will go away - honestly I'd be a bit embarrassed, but I would love it if I could go back to being a man without the anxiety.

[MissDanielle]

My mom thinks I am still just a CD. She also thinks I am going to live full-time as soon as I move.