Claire Cook
01-31-2016, 08:41 AM
We’ve been having lots of threads about CD vs TG vs TS, and they have probably made some of us take a re-think about where we are and who we are. I know they have made me take a step back and take stock of where I am. This weekend has been a big help.
Given the winter storm and a fairly stressful couple of weeks at work here in the DC area, I haven’t had much time to be out and about. I generally dress for a couple of hours in the morning – good time to do domestic chores and do my yoga and stretching exercises before facing the day. This weekend I decided that I needed to be me, so at least until Monday AM I am me. Yesterday I had a number of errands to run – drop off the dry cleaning, take the Metro to Trader Joe’s for provisions, walk to the mall to get a new hoodie and cosmetics … and the day just reinforced who I am. I’ve posted elsewhere – and many of you have had similar experiences – that being treated as another woman, especially by other women – is a potent validation of who I am. Just out of the blue women will smile and start talking with me .. and I find myself doing the same. (“Be careful of that ice”. “I just love that mushroom ravioli.” “Let me see if I can get you an extra discount on that hoodie.”) A homeless man hit me up for a couple of dollars, and I was happy to oblige (“God bless you” … “and God bless you, ma,am”). These things hardly ever happen when I’m in guy clothes.
I know I am less uptight, less male-oriented, and less self-conscious when I am presenting as female. (And, yes, happier.) So where does this leave me in terms of the opening OP? It tells me to be me, that I need to be out and about as a woman, as much as I can. Can I balance this with being a man? Definitely. I think it makes me a better man … make that a better person. Embracing female emotions and empathy, and not repressing myself, just makes me a warmer and more complete person no matter what I am wearing. No, I don’t want to be 24/7, at least on a full-time basis. Where does put me in terms of the opening question? Somewhere…
I wonder how many of you feel the same way.
Given the winter storm and a fairly stressful couple of weeks at work here in the DC area, I haven’t had much time to be out and about. I generally dress for a couple of hours in the morning – good time to do domestic chores and do my yoga and stretching exercises before facing the day. This weekend I decided that I needed to be me, so at least until Monday AM I am me. Yesterday I had a number of errands to run – drop off the dry cleaning, take the Metro to Trader Joe’s for provisions, walk to the mall to get a new hoodie and cosmetics … and the day just reinforced who I am. I’ve posted elsewhere – and many of you have had similar experiences – that being treated as another woman, especially by other women – is a potent validation of who I am. Just out of the blue women will smile and start talking with me .. and I find myself doing the same. (“Be careful of that ice”. “I just love that mushroom ravioli.” “Let me see if I can get you an extra discount on that hoodie.”) A homeless man hit me up for a couple of dollars, and I was happy to oblige (“God bless you” … “and God bless you, ma,am”). These things hardly ever happen when I’m in guy clothes.
I know I am less uptight, less male-oriented, and less self-conscious when I am presenting as female. (And, yes, happier.) So where does this leave me in terms of the opening OP? It tells me to be me, that I need to be out and about as a woman, as much as I can. Can I balance this with being a man? Definitely. I think it makes me a better man … make that a better person. Embracing female emotions and empathy, and not repressing myself, just makes me a warmer and more complete person no matter what I am wearing. No, I don’t want to be 24/7, at least on a full-time basis. Where does put me in terms of the opening question? Somewhere…
I wonder how many of you feel the same way.