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LisaKarenAZ
02-14-2016, 07:23 PM
My wife has known about my CD'ing for about 12 years now. Unfortunately, I had never told her about this, and she found out by finding my stash. Like many others, I thought getting married and raising a family would make this thing I didn't really understand, go away.

Fast forward a few years... She's been hot and cold, mainly cold, over the past 6-7 years. She would start to accept it in a DADT form, then flip 180 degrees and hate me for it, then start warming up to it again.

Over the past 2 years, she has been recovering from thyroid cancer, which has changed both of our perspectives on life. In this time, she became more and more comfortable with me wearing panties and getting rid of my guy's underwear. But, she wasn't comfortable with anything, and communication has been difficult at best.

Over the past couple of months, our communication has been much more open and honest about this side of me, and it has made a huge difference.

About a week or two ago, she gave me the full green light to be myself as much as I needed to be when away from the house in the road. She just wants me to be honest with her, 100%, and doesn't want to be surprised by finding anything new. I told her that I had painted my toes, and bought some lingerie while on my trip last week, and slept in a nightie every night. She thanked me for being honest, and is happy that I can be myself.

We have not been this close, emotionally, in the entire time we've been married. She's even told me that I am a different person when I have a chance to be myself.

Today we were supposed to go get mani/pedis together, but she wasn't able to get out of the house today. She had asked me yesterday to take my polish off before, but we forgot to pick up any remover yesterday when we were out shopping. She told me this morning to go ahead and go without her, just so I could get my massage after the week of walking and on my feet 12 hours daily. Since we forgot the remover, she actually told me to just tell the girls at the salon that I lost a bet.

We talked about it a bit more, and I told her I'd like to get the thyroid awareness ribbon painted on my big toes, and she almost wept. She told me to go ahead and get whatever I wanted to have done, along with the ribbons. She even told me to get the ribbons on my thumbnails.

Aside from getting used to the pink base behind the ribbon on my big toes, she loves it and appreciates me doing this.

On the way back from the salon, I had to stop to pick some things for dinner. I wasn't thinking when I left the house earlier, and ended up leaving with my flip flops on instead of my sneakers. I had to own the nails in the stores, and all I ended up with is 4 compliments from complete strangers.

I am so happy, and my wife told me that she's seen the peace in my eyes, and will stand behind parts of my dressing no matter what. She just doesn't to see me completely done up, but nails and underdressing are perfectly okay.

I am in love!!!

Pat
02-14-2016, 07:49 PM
Awesome! I'm glad for you. :)

BettyMorgan
02-14-2016, 08:44 PM
Lisa,
She sounds like a wonderful person. I want to add that if she loves you for you, that she may eventually change her mind and see how important this part of your life is (CDing) and eventually want to see you completely done up. But in the meantime, appreciate what you have. Appreciate her. Appreciate her. Appreciate her.

LisaKarenAZ
02-14-2016, 10:58 PM
Thanks for the replies.

I have learned over the same last couple of years to really appreciate whatever I have, and not to yearn for tomorrow. Between her illnesses, and her just simply being a beautiful soul, I have also been able to learn additional patience.

She is my world, as well as my inspiration. Her strength and refusal to give up helps my perspective on the value of all the little things. After over 30 years of shame, fear, and guilt, she is also showing me how to let go of those feelings, and be happy with all aspects of who I am.

Although everything could change tomorrow, I am grateful for every last moment of bliss that I have with this beautiful woman.

Robin414
02-14-2016, 11:07 PM
Wow Lisa, awesome story, thanks so much for sharing! Sometimes unfortunate events can have a silver lining and strengthen relationships in unexpected ways ☺

I truly wish her a complete and speedy recovery!

LisaKarenAZ
02-14-2016, 11:13 PM
Thanks Robin.

I almost forgot the one thing that completely blew me away last night. She was on the Bath and Body Works website ordering some wallflower refills, shower gel, and lotion. She turned to me and asked me if I wanted to order anything!!!

I now have some pretty smelling bath products on the way!

LaurenS
02-15-2016, 06:42 AM
I really can't express in words how happy I am for both of you!

pamela7
02-15-2016, 07:33 AM
lovely story, thank you, and congratulations!

Teressa
02-15-2016, 07:41 AM
I hope the best for her and strength for you both as she and you battle the cancer.

mechamoose
02-15-2016, 07:45 AM
It isn't a disease. You are not sick.

The only time I have ever gotten grief over my painted toes was from a Texas cop.

I'm happy that your wife has made some kind of peace with it. My woman buys me pretty stuff. Women *like* males being pretty. I get positive comments on my nails all the time!

- MM

- - - Updated - - -


Thanks for the replies.

I have learned over the same last couple of years to really appreciate whatever I have, and not to yearn for tomorrow. Between her illnesses, and her just simply being a beautiful soul, I have also been able to learn additional patience.

She is my world, as well as my inspiration. Her strength and refusal to give up helps my perspective on the value of all the little things. After over 30 years of shame, fear, and guilt, she is also showing me how to let go of those feelings, and be happy with all aspects of who I am.

Although everything could change tomorrow, I am grateful for every last moment of bliss that I have with this beautiful woman.

As a cancer survivor, I really appreciate your courage. I also *LOVE* your nails.

- MM

LisaKarenAZ
02-17-2016, 07:10 AM
Thanks for the responses.

As an update, I have been openly wearing my nails out now for a few days. I have to say that it can be challenging to walk around a busy store without feeling like all eyes are on my feet. But, I have noticed a couple of people even look down, and have already received some compliments on looks and how awesome it is to support my wife this way.

Last night she told me how much she appreciated me doing my nails and wearing the ribbon for her. She is now planning my next mani/pedi designs. She actually would love it if I did my fingernails too, and add words like hope, life, and love to my fingers. I'm proposing tips with a teal base, purple tip, and thin pink stripe separating the tip. Of course, I would have the ribbon on each thumb. She's actually thinking she likes it.