Sneaking around is no fun!

[Judy-Somthing]

Well this morning I said in another thread,

"Six weeks ago I tried coming out to my to my wife about CDing, she freaked and doesn't want to talk about it"

Well yesterday after playing around with some makeup ideas I used some eye makeup remover pads.

This morning after my wife left for work I remembered I left them on them in the bathroom.

I looked in the bathroom and saw they were in the trash.

My wife doesn't use makeup pads and my daughter hasn't been home in over five days.

I guess I'm rocking the boat. I hate this feeling. I guess she probably hates it more.

MY eye makeup remover container is still on the sink, at this point I don't know what to do.

Is it time to purge? This is bad.

[MidwayNH]

As some of the other threads say. NEVER PURGE. Just put the stuff away and forget about it for a bit if you feel the need. I think ether you don't say anything and see if it slides or just tell her you are sorry before she has a chance to say anything to you.

I have never been married but my grand parents were married from just after WWII until the day my grandfather died back in 2006. "They both told me that marriage is a compromise. You are gonna have fights and stuff you are not going to be work past, some of those thing you can work around instead of past and some of them you just let them drop by the wayside and do you best to ignore them when they happen to show back up."

She was a "thick headed Italian" and he was "stubborn as a mule". Thats what they called each other.

[Chelsea B]

Why purge? Are you able to keep your wardrobe well hidden?

If it were me, I'd not say or do anything, and wait to see if and what she says.
Do you think that up till now she might have put two and two together anyway?

My relationship is DADT, but I had a close call a few weeks ago. The wife had just left for work and I went to the garage and was digging out a pair of new shoes to break in. This required moving a few things in front of a stored nightstand, and going into it. The garage door opened, as she had forgotten something. I scrambled to put everything the way it was, but I know she saw what I was doing. Not a word has been spoken since.

- - - Updated - - -

Oh, and from what I Have seen from your pictures, your wardrobe is fantastic! It would be a pity to purge!

[Krisi]

I have posted many times that the chances of a crossdresser hiding his dressing from someone living in the same house are somewhere between slim and none. You post pretty much proves my point. We will all slip up or have someone come home unexpectedly sooner or later.

I would say either get rid of everything or put it where it cannot be found and wait to see what happens.

BTW: Makeup is one of the hardest things to conceal. Not just the products but the evidence of its use.

[Rachelakld]

And why is it, everyone askes me if I'm wearing mascara, 2 hours after I've removed it, even those that don't know about my Cding?

[ChristinaK]

I've had similar situations. What I do is ignore it. Mostly, she does too if she knows I'm trying to prevent her from seeing anything. Other times, I have had a shot or two across my bow, then I apologize and walk away smiling to myself.

Marriage is not always a bowl of cherries, is it?

[Diversity]

Perhaps approaching your wife by saying:" thank you for putting my makeup pads in the trash", and then follow this up with: "I didn't mean to leave them there, and I know my crossdressing makes you uncomfortable. So I want to say I'm sorry, and I'll do better next time. If you ever want to talk with me about this, I would like to, as I don't want this to become a problem between us." Or something to that effect.
It's best to be humble, in this situation, and by knowing and admitting it was your fault, hopefully she will not be angry and will respect you for respecting her.
Good luck, Judy.
Di

[Laurenlovecd]

Never purge!! Been there, done it, then you have to go buy everything again.

I go around the house after dressing, 5 times. You can't check everything enough. Clean up after yourself. Open windows to air out the polish remover. Take a shower. Get grainy facial soap from the health store to remove the foundation, concealer, and beard cover. (Proactive acne face soap works well too) and eye makeup remover. Go back in an hour and do it again, because you will always miss some. One time after wearing perfume I went to the gas station and deliberately spilled some gas on my foot to cover up the perfume until I jumped in the shower.

I no longer dress on days that I work. I have had numerous people look at my face and eyes, even after I think I have all the make up off. No matter what, it seems like you can't hide the eyes if you had makeup on them.

Just don't purge. Use common sense and don't overdo it. Some guys get so caught up in this that it takes over their lives. Don't let that happen and you will be fine.

[Krisi]

You know you don't have to wear a bunch of makeup to crossdress. There is not a set of rules.

[Nicole Heather]

My spouse can always see mascara or eyeliner on me after I've removed it and inspected my eyes closely. Don't know she does it -- either I'm blind or she has eyes like a hawk.

[alwayshave]

I no longer dress on days that I work. I have had numerous people look at my face and eyes, even after I think I have all the make up off. No matter what, it seems like you can't hide the eyes if you had makeup on them.


One of the secretaries in my firm once asked me if I had eyeliner on. Of course I said no. I went to the men's room and of course I had eye liner on. Fortunately there is a CVS in the same block as my office and I ran down got the makeup remover towelettes and finished the job I failed at the evening before.

[Abbey11]

Hi
Not sure what you girls are using to remove eye makeup but normal makeup removal towels just won't do the trick. Baby oil or specific eye make up remover is needed, removes it all no problem.
Abbey x

[Leighcdmd]

Neutragena eye makeup removal pads work great. With decades of crossdressing experience under my belt....err corset, I have yet to find a better product.

[Jamie Lynn]

Hi Judy, I would second Diversity's advise. You should be communicating in the marriage, about everything, good or bad. She may not want to talk about it but at least you're acknowledging her and apologizing. Hope it gets better!

[Jenny22]

Buy a magnifying mirror and check to see that ALL makeup is gone. I use a 10 power, and it has served me well.

[sometimes_miss]

+1 on the magnifying mirror. Works great to see what others see, instead of just what we can barely discern in the foggy bathroom mirror.