What I've been up to lately

[PaulaQ]

I'm still here. I have been battling pneumonia for seemingly months now. I was diagnosed with it on Tuesday after waking up laying on the floor, wondering why my head hurt and was bleeding a little bit. (It hurt because I lost consciousness and face planted into the floor!)

I'm not on here as much because I'm basically through my transition, and I'm really busy helping others. That leaves me with a lot less to talk about here. I can't really talk much about others, not ethically. The really interesting stuff going on in my life is mostly stuff I'm not allowed to talk about here. But it's really interesting, oh my yes, I can tell you that. For example, last night, I talked with a trans woman who was assaulted here locally last week, an activist who's working against the anti-trans legislation coming out against us, a woman coming out to her family. After all of that, I just didn't have anything left for this place.

If you are curious about one of the things I've been really busy with, though, you can read about it here:
All in the family (http://m.dallasvoice.com/family-2-10212408.html)

It's a support group for trans (including CDs), and Spouses, Significant Others, Family, Friends, and Allies. (SOFFAs - although it should also include "parents" - but it was hard to fit a "P" into the acronym.)

This next meeting (Thursday 2/25 from 7-9), I intend to talk all about sexual orientation and trans people.

[steftoday]

that's a great article, and a great photo of you as well.
I was wondering what you were up to...
feel better too!

[AnnieMac]

Yes, a very flattering photo in the article! Quite lovely, you should use it as your Avatar. Since you said you are now busy with some other things, after you now are fully transitioned. I was wondering how hard of a time period that is immediately after all of the focus and emotion on transitioning is now just focused on day-to-day life. Like, Ok, I transitioned, now what?
Maybe you could share a few comments about that. Thx, Annie

[Tina_gm]

Paula, I am truly amazed what you have done and how you are now helping in the community. It has been for you an amazing journey through life. I remember you being this lost TG soul. You had just newly discovered who you truly were. Once you finally discarded your iron mask, or suit I suppose, just reading what you have done has been inspiring. Not only have you walked through the fire, but now you have and are helping others through it as well. Kudos to you lady. I am sorry you have been ill as of late.

[Georgette_USA]

Paula
I am impressed with all you are giving back to OUR community. My partner and I just left all that behind in 1985.

I have been getting back into all this since 2014. I have learned a lot of current events.

[flatlander_48]

PQ:

Great article and wonderful photo!

I fully understand that you can't get into specifics about your various involvements. However, how about this: Perhaps a periodic message about what the group is up to, what issues people are struggling with (family, work, etc.), what is going well and what difficulties you see going forward. In other words, information that is of a more high level and philosophical nature.

What I've noticed here (in all of a week and a half now and a week a couple of years ago!) is that the LGB community is really strong in the Palm Springs area, but the T community so far seems to be pretty quiet. Maybe I haven't hit the right nerve yet, but we'll see. Anyway, it could make for an interesting comparison to what is, or is not, happening here.

Be Well,

DeeAnn

[Kris Avery]

Awesome Paula, you never cease to amaze me.

My wife would love this kind of thing - if I can ever get her down to DFW.

She is such a busy lady

[PaulaQ]

Sorry for the slow reply to this thread - I've been recovering from pneumonia. I'm doing lots better now.


I was wondering how hard of a time period that is immediately after all of the focus and emotion on transitioning is now just focused on day-to-day life. Like, Ok, I transitioned, now what?

I'm not having too much problem with "now what?" That has been fairly obvious for me, personally, although I think you are asking a really good question Annie, because I think a lot of us who transition face the question of "now what" once their transition is more or less complete. For me, I've been working on a number of things:
- furthering my relationship with my fiancé
- moving in with my fiancé
- furthering my relationship with my girlfriend
- starting our new trans & loved ones support group
- fighting (such as I can) against anti-trans legislation and sentiment
- providing direct support (moral support, if nothing else) for a number of struggling trans people
- decorating our loft
- fighting with my ex-wife (again) over the house she won in our divorce. (She wants to abandon it to the bank, leaving them to come after me...)
- oh yeah, I also have a day job.

I think for me, transition has made clear the kinds of things I'm supposed to do, at least for now - a mission of sorts. When I started this, I told my ex-wife that "I don't know what my life will mean in the future, but I want it to be about love." She opined that this was easily the most idiotic thing she'd ever heard - what did that even mean, "a life about love?" But I feel I'm doing just that. I'm not just talking about romantic partners, but really all of the people I have the privilege of serving in the community.


In other words, information that is of a more high level and philosophical nature.

Well, I'm really happy that HB1008 in South Dakota - an anti-trans youth bill was vetoed by the governor. Bills like that are a direct threat to the entire trans community.
I gave a presentation last week to my group called "Are you gay, or something?" - it was about sexual orientation but focused on transgender individuals.
I think the next one I do will be a "transgender for trans people" presentation, or maybe one on abuse.
I'm also looking for various speakers who've made the transition from living in one community (for example, the straight world), and then successfully living in another (for example, the gay or lesbian community.)

I appreciate everyone's kind words, by the way. I'm really surprised at the responses I get sometimes. My hope, of course, is that others will see me, realize "how hard can it be - Paula can do it?" and then go on to help others in some manner.

[St. Eve]

PaulaQ

So glad to read about your life. If you are looking to serve and inspire, you are for me!!
If you have not read the first chapter of "A Path with Heart," - you might be interested....the main topic is about your new life mission....living a life centered on love.
While you can be the only authentic knower of whether you are being a life centered on love, or not, it certainly appears so from the outside.

Thank you for being a part of Organized Hospitality instead of the Organized Violence we are often surrounded by....

Peace
Stevie

[PaulaQ]

Thanks Stevie!

Small update. I'm back down with pneumonia again. :( It's not that I don't love y'all - I've just felt like hammered crap for the past few days...

[Cristy2]

Hope you get feeling better soon.