Showing off??

[ilianar17]

18yrs old, crossdressing for 5 years.

Let me explain:

These days in Greece we have the corresponding Halloween.

Last week was a costume party and I got fully dressed with the help of my (very skilled) girlfriend. My closest friends who saw me first told me that it's FREAKISH how I resemble a girl, and they seemed a little weirded out, though still in a good mood. I felt SO flattered. It was one of these moments you rarely feel so many positive emotions and they just hit you. I didn't care for a split second about being too overdressed (or overcostumed?) for the party, or what ANYBODY thought of me (truth is some people who recognized me gave a couple of disapproving looks, anyhow). I felt pretty, and like I was flying. The rush of happy feelings was so immense, I had a genuine good time.

Upon returning from the party and before I removed my makeup I took a few photos. The next day I showed the best one to my mother, told her it was taken as part of a joke with my gf. As soon as she looked at that photo she was staggered. the photo was so convincing she, as a joke, showed it to the rest of the family (who were also pretty surprised, but they took it well). Although I'm feeling a bit ashamed because it's my good ol family, deep down my heart is jumping. Same response from a couple of trustworthy friends.

I love almost everything around cding. Browsing/wearing clothes, taking care of my skin and hair, learning more about makeup and how to act (walk/talk/move) like a woman. The sexual thrill has worn off, so it is more than just a turn on.

So that got me thinking, is it weird that I want to literally show off?

(note: I am very aware that crossdressing is something I do for ME. It's just that the overwhelmingly positive reactions of the people around me push me deeper down the rabbit's hole.)

[Teresa]

Ilianar,
No it's not weird, it's natural to want to express your feelings and need validation for it ! Keep a copy of the picture it's part of your process of acceptance, I'm still using pictures as a means of coming to terms with my CDing and getting acceptance from other people. Besides I now use it to keep a record of how an outfit looked and if I would change anything or need to buy something different to make it work better.

[Nadine Spirit]

I am thrilled for you that you shared yourself and that you got a positive response but..... you didn't really share yourself. You showed folks something that is not a joke for you, and basically told them that it is in fact a joke. Then when they enjoyed the joke, and thought it was a good joke, you took it that they were giving the real you a complement. Before you allow all of these positive responses to push you further down the rabbit hole, maybe you should tell them all that it is not a joke, and it was not down just for Halloween. And then judge the response you get. Maybe it will be just as positive!

Just a thought.......

[Pat]

Why would it be weird to enjoy acceptance and validation? ;)

[ilianar17]

I am thrilled for you that you shared yourself and that you got a positive response but..... you didn't really share yourself. You showed folks something that is not a joke for you, and basically told them that it is in fact a joke. Then when they enjoyed the joke, and thought it was a good joke, you took it that they were giving the real you a complement. Before you allow all of these positive responses to push you further down the rabbit hole, maybe you should tell them all that it is not a joke, and it was not down just for Halloween. And then judge the response you get. Maybe it will be just as positive!

Just a thought.......

I understand. The way I see it is that by presenting it as a joke I also kind of gave them some room to be objective on my appearance. The very few people that know my secret, have accepted me and react almost just as positive. I know the time will come that it will be more than just a cute joke for them and I'm preparing for it. Thanks for bringing me down to earth again I needed this reminder!

[Ressie]

18 and no more sexual thrill? :( I've never dressed en femme for a costume party - it must have been a blast. I think my mom knew I was a CD before I did. She had me trick or treating in my sister's coat when I was 5 for starters!

[ilianar17]

18 and no more sexual thrill? :( I've never dressed en femme for a costume party - it must have been a blast. I think my mom knew I was a CD before I did. She had me trick or treating in my sister's coat when I was 5 for starters!

I wish my mom did that too! Yes the costume party was a blast! The sexual thrill is less intense not entirely gone.

[rachelatshop]

Hi Ilianar, My first time to dress as a woman from the inside out was for a halloween party. I was a lot older than you are, and for me it was some what a turning point in my dressing and I will never forget the feeling of that dress.
Thank you for your sharing your experience it brings back plecents memories.

[Nikki A.]

Happy for you, but a word of caution. In the big cities there may be more of a tolerance but out in the country it is a little different. Also they may be more accepting of it as a joke but otherwise especially with the economic turmoil if it is seen as more of a gender issue tolerance may be an issue especially in the workplace and keeping a job. I do have family there and was recently there. It is a beautiful country and wonderful people but be careful.

[deebra]

Since you passed so well and your GF helped, how do you and she feel about the two of you going out as two girls?

[Beverley Sims]

I don't think it is weird at all.

Because I had success similar to you I was able to capitalise on the situation and went out dressed as a girl often.

My girlfriends always gave me the encouragement.

[docrobbysherry]

I'm a firm believer in the motto, "If you've got it? Flaunt it!", Ilianar. I'm 70 and still turned on by that beauty in my mirror!:o

What I DO think is odd about yout post? It's about showing off how u good u look, but, u didn't even include ONE PHOTO so we mite see for ourselves-----:sad:

[Tracii G]

Yes I agree with Sherry post a pic so we all can see.

[ilianar17]

Yes I agree with Sherry post a pic so we all can see.

I have a thread with a couple of very recent pictures on the forum! Link to that thread right below

http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?237210-From-last-night