Outing Mannerisms

[AnnieMac]

I was just wondering, as I try to prepare a better public presentation of my female self, assuming y'all pass relatively acceptably considering, and not talking about the
obvious voice issues. What physical mannerisms that you have presented in public, gave you away the most that got you read?

[Krisi]

Other than size and height, and failing to pad the butt and hips, I would think it's the way we walk and carry our arms and hands. It's hard to relearn walking and body motion and then once we do, we have to be able to turn it on and off depending on the situation.

[Nadine Spirit]

I don't know about myself, as I have never done a survey of those who have observed me in public afterwards. But the other day my wife and I were shopping at a DSW and she asked if I had seen the other TG woman. I had seen her, but I didn't recognize her as being TG. When I asked my wife how she knew, she listed off about ten little tiny things that made her question that person's gender. Things like, they were shopping for size 11s, they had large hands, they kept straightening out their clothes a bit much, they were continually checking their appearance in the mirror and a few other details I can't remember right now. Basically it wasn't any one thing, but all together it made her think they were TG.

[AnnieMac]

Nadine, those are actually pretty good tips from your wife, that can be easily fixed on how we carry ourselves. The one thing I always notice when I see women walking and moving around is how much less arm space they take up, with their elbows so close into their body, while men walking kind of with their arms akimbo -its probably why I can't carry a purse very well ( one of the hardest things for me to feel natural with ).

[Laura.Taylor]

not that I've gone out in public much, but I know I tend to over do the girly mannerisms and that attracts attention which then invites scrutiny.

[Helen_Highwater]

As Nadine says, it's difficult to know firstly if you've been read and if so why. What I would say is having looked at YouTube vids of CD'ers, if they get the walk wrong then it's an instant giveaway. If you're under 6' then size isn't an immediate tell whereas broad shoulders and narrow hips as Krisi says failing to pad the lower half, not just the chest can be another pointer.

[Krisi]

One way to know you've been read is when someone is walking towards you and they look at you and make a face (and it's not a smile). That happened to me one time and it was enough ruin my evening.

Something I forgot to mention above is; being dressed inappropriately for the time and place. Too often, crossdressers feel compelled to wear very high heels and very short skirts and way too much makeup. Perhaps this is because we get to be "women" only once in a while, while actual women are women 24/7 and don't feel the need to go all the way just to go to the mall.

[I Am Paula]

Speaking from a TS standpoint, we have it a little easier, cause all the female stuff is there, if we just quit the male stuff, however, among my TS friends, I have noticed a faux pas. Even wearing jeans, or leggings, you still can't sit with your legs apart. There is one exception- If you are among girlfriends, drinking wine in somebody's home, (and wearing leggings), you may sit in the lotus position. (It's like English, an exception to every rule) Have fun!

[Krisi]

Yes, it's hard to break habits you've had for fifty years or more. Really hard because you don't realize you are doing these things. Little boys emulate men and little girls emulate women in so many subtle ways.

One day I was sitting in the easy chair watching TV dressed, but with my legs spread apart. My wife looked at me and said "That's not very ladylike."

At least a transsexual doesn't have to learn to turn the female mannerisms on and off depending on the presentation.

[IamWren]

I saw a thread here on the forum that talked about the dozens of minuscule things that can give a CDer away. It was started by one of the GG members years ago (unfortunately I can't remember who) and she described a conversation she had with a co-worker. The co-worker was the one who said the person was flicking her hair with her fingertips using both hands and was doing it a lot. It was a small "tell" that got her to scrutinize the CDer's presentation.

Anyway, one thing I've notice is that when men walk they tend to (and this is an exaggerated description) with their palms of their hands facing toward their back. Women tend to walk with the palms of their hands facing more at like a 45 degree angle toward the front of their body.

[Beverley Sims]

As far as I know, when tired sitting down with your legs apart is a great failing.

It has not happened to me and when I have been clocked it could have been a collection of mannerisms.