awkward night...

[nikky]

i just came home from a trip and my mother who, bless her heart, got bored and decided to clean my room, found some of my STUFF. she bought one of thoose shoe racks to hang in my closet cuz i have little space in my room from all the junk i accumulated at college and when i returned she had assembled it and put all my shoes, including my three pair of heels, in the rack. i have no idea what she is thinking but i am afraid i'm out and not sure im ready for such conversation to occur. i dont even have a valid excuse for them so i really dont know what to think...:( :( :( :(

[uknowhoo]

Yep, awkward sounds like a good description.:o

Sorry to hear of your situation, Nikky.

I'm sure your mom's feeling somewhat awkward about it too. Who knows, if you don't bring it up, perhaps she won't either. But then, the "unsaid" would still be left hanging out there. That wouldn't be very pleasant either.

I don't know what your relationship with her is like, but this seems as good a time to bring it up as any.

Good luck, sweetie.

Tammi


Hey she loves you enough to buy you shoe racks, right.:o

[AprilMae]

Forgotten items from an old girlfriend perhaps?

[Carlacd]

Hope all goes well, if you have the talk.

[gwenrob43]

Yes, awkward, but very opportune! :D You couldn't ask for a better time to do it, come on out. I should talk, but I've never had an opportunity like this. Bellieve me, it's custom made. I know it's scary. LOL:bs:

[nikky]

you all may be right about it being an opportune time...

i am guessing she would be okay with it because of the way it worked. i mean she just put them there like it was nothing. she didnt leave them hidden or anything so maybe she actually has a clue already, i dont know. im going to see how she reacts tomorrow i guess.... just scared things may change around here but maybe for the better :o

[Deanna2]

Mothers are all around lovely people especially for keeping dinner warm when you are late home, saying 'my boy can do no wrong', etc. However, their urge to clean up the rooms of their male offspring must be hardwired into their systems. You ain't gonna change that!

[Danielle]

I have been a member for a short time but my very first post was about my Mom finding my skirts and I was just blown away as to what to explain to her,alot of advice I got here from all these great people was to be upfront but then again each situation is diffrent.My answer to my mother was that they belonged to a girl(friend) a gave a ride to the laundry...end of that! :D

[DawnRodgers]

I think that you have to be aware that your mother may indeed think that they belong to a girl. Maybe a "roommate" from college? Hard to say but I don't think I'd out myself tp her just yet.

[Lilith Moon]

The first girly item I bought was a corset and my mother found it in my bedroom. She assumed that it belonged to a girlfriend and gave me the third degree for days. She wanted to know who was the owner. I never did tell her it belonged to me...or anyone else.

Eventually she gave up asking, but the corset vanished...never to return :(

[Adnama]

Hey everyone,

My mum found all my things in my room when I was a teenager. She asked me what I was doing with them all and I just told her the truth. She was fine with it and asked me if I still wanted to keep them. A few years later she asked me if I was still doing that.....and I lied and said no.....still sorry to this day....that was my opportunity for it to be out in the open.

Have a nice day.

Amanda.

[Wendy me]

you know mom's are just too wonderfull in my opion the shoes on the rack she already had a little talk ... my thinking you know her best so let things go a bit and see when you or her feel it's time to talk...

[swiss_susan]

You are the best judge of the situation. And you know your mom better than anyone, so if you think its for the best then sure have the "talk." If not than let it be.

Susan

[Victoria Pink]

I would say that since she hs found your things and that because she has respected you by putting your shoes on your shoe rack then you should be honest with her. Tell her what's been happening, how you feel and how you need her love a support. Most of all tell her that you love her. Thank her for her care. Tell her that more than ever you need her support in your desire to dress. Mothers are wonderful! :angel:

Victoria

[Wendy me]

ok it's been a while from the time i lived at home with mom and dad , but when mom wanted to let me know that she "found" something she just moved it a little ..... when she wanted to talk abought something we did....

[melissacd]

I agree that this is an opportunity. It she was upset about it she would have either confronted you like my mother did when I was young or she would have taken them away thinking they were mis-placed. The fact that she tidied them up may have been her way of saying she is okay with it and also suggesting that if you want to play the part you probably want to be a little neater about it.

I guess the question you have to ask yourself is would you feel better if she knew, was okay with it and you could talk to her about it? She has already shown some small level of acceptance. You may want to test the waters further and see how open minded she can be about this.

[DanaJ]

Nikky - I am confused. I went back and read most of your previous posts, and you say you have painted toes all the time, your legs are shaved throughout the winter months, you have gone out shopping en femme even though you are in a small town where everyone knows everyone else, and your sister has dressed you and made you up before...

And in this post, http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?p=70872#post70872 you say your family has already caught you with girl clothes on, makeup laid out and fingers and toes polished. So, did nothing ever get mentioned since then? And with all the other stuff you have written about, you think that none of your family knows????

I think finding shoes would be the least of it....

[MsJanessa]

i just came home from a trip and my mother who, bless her heart, got bored and decided to clean my room, found some of my STUFF. she bought one of thoose shoe racks to hang in my closet cuz i have little space in my room from all the junk i accumulated at college and when i returned she had assembled it and put all my shoes, including my three pair of heels, in the rack. i have no idea what she is thinking but i am afraid i'm out and not sure im ready for such conversation to occur. i dont even have a valid excuse for them so i really dont know what to think...:( :( :( :(
Well according to your post you are 26 years old.---that's old enough to have a private life that you don't have to explain to your parents--if you want to you can tell your mother, if you don't want to you don't have to, if she can't accept either your not telling her or if she can't accept your crossdressing then you can always find a place of your own.

[Tamara Croft]

Actually, according to her post on the 25th Jan 2005, she was 24, now shes 26..... what happened to 25?

http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?p=71732#post71732

Note the date.... 25th January 2005..... and her birthday is the 22nd ;)

[kathy gg]

All I know is I do not want what ever Nikki is drinking because it ages you wayyy to fast!!!! Hopefully next week when Nikki turns 40 all of this won't matter.

[KathrynW]

I think that you have to be aware that your mother may indeed think that they belong to a girl.
Righttt...
A girl with extremely large feet...:yikes:

[nikky]

DANA...

did you ever stop to think that some people are not as open as you may be. when i signed on to this thing god knows how long ago i had fear of putting my actual b-day on it and never cared a damn bit to change it. i had not idea if my sister may see something on here and recognize my by the age and bday. SO if you must know my bday is the 21st of jan 82. so yes im 24 now. . . . and DANA in the winter time it is not that hard to get away with shaving your legs and painting toenails. i do own socks.

sister dressed me when i was younger for a halloween joke and as far as the caught story goes. it ended with me in the bathroom adjacent to my sisters room, which in turn had all the makeup and clothes on the bed so i assumed it was seen.

AND LAST...DANA...i, like every one else on the site come here for support and open minded people. not to be ridiculed by a condescending ass...

THANK YOU

[DanaJ]

Ummmm - funny thing is, I don't remember mentioning anything about a birthdate or your age, perhaps you could point me to that please?

You have also sidestepped the question - what happened when you were caught the last time? That may have some bearing on this time perhaps?
I have given much help and support to lots of members here, I asked you a few questions to get a feel for how better to give you some advice, and this is how you answer me?

I simply asked some questions - my, my aren't we just a wee bit defensive?

[Wendy me]

DANA...

did you ever stop to think that some people are not as open as you may be. when i signed on to this thing god knows how long ago i had fear of putting my actual b-day on it and never cared a damn bit to change it. i had not idea if my sister may see something on here and recognize my by the age and bday. SO if you must know my bday is the 21st of jan 82. so yes im 24 now. . . . and DANA in the winter time it is not that hard to get away with shaving your legs and painting toenails. i do own socks.

sister dressed me when i was younger for a halloween joke and as far as the caught story goes. it ended with me in the bathroom adjacent to my sisters room, which in turn had all the makeup and clothes on the bed so i assumed it was seen.

AND LAST...DANA...i, like every one else on the site come here for support and open minded people. not to be ridiculed by a condescending ass...

THANK YOU


real nice way to talk to a mod here ...i do so think your calling her (dana) a condesceding ass is not the way to become a long time member here ....:thumbsdn:
your class is showing / or the lack of...

[Glenda]

Just like newspapers or magazines, you can't believe everything you read. Especially in an anonymous forum such as this. One thing you can believe. Parents love thier children, especially mothers. I don't think it is right to lie to your mother. Especially at an age where you are old enough to move out on your own and instead choose to live with your parents.

[Tamara Croft]

OK then... let's have a look at the rest of your lies then shall we?

You posted this a while back.

http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?p=118458#post118458

So I did a bit more research today... and found this linked to your ID 'foxychiknp', which you cannot deny, as you posted a link of your toenails in the above thread.

According to the webshots website where her toenail pictures are, she's also MARRIED..... In the next link, scroll down to the 3rd comment...

http://community.webshots.com/guestbook?albumID=65987083

On Sep 18, 2004 8:35:41 AM, foxychiknp wrote:
i wish my feet were small enough to fit into my wifes sexy shoes. i can only wair a few pair of them... oh well cute pics Thought you had a girlfriend? thought you lived with your parents..... yet..... as you can see above, you really are full of it aren't you :rolleyes:

Main album...

http://community.webshots.com/album/180687284iHbtkD

Need I go on? and one more thing, what is St. Marys Internet?

[Fallen Angel]

All rite girls,lets all get along here we have enought going on in our lifes with out having going on here

[Sharon]

real nice way to talk to a mod here ...

Or to anyone else! Do it again and you'll be looking for a new place to tell your tall stories. :angry:

[Wendy me]

i think her "rep" speaks for it's selfe....

[kathy gg]

Nikky, Giving support and open mindedness comes with some level of honesty. If you can't even be somewhat honest in this community it will be hard for people to give you support and trust or friendship.

I don't think any members of this site care to be led on wild goose chases when it comes to giving heart felt advice and friendship.

After viewing what Dana & Tamara pointed out regarding your post history I think you will find most people will feel a bit put off from offering you help in the future.

Other peeople have been able to fess up and come clean when they have started down the road to half-truth here. And ya know what, that is okay. We all make mistakes. Starting to admit them is the first step to moving forward to finding the support you seek. Most people will give you another chance here if you just decide to wipe the slate clean.

One thing my parents always taught me and something I try very hard to live by : the truth comes naturally, lies have to be remembered.

Just some advice.




DANA...

did you ever stop to think that some people are not as open as you may be. when i signed on to this thing god knows how long ago i had fear of putting my actual b-day on it and never cared a damn bit to change it. i had not idea if my sister may see something on here and recognize my by the age and bday. SO if you must know my bday is the 21st of jan 82. so yes im 24 now. . . . and DANA in the winter time it is not that hard to get away with shaving your legs and painting toenails. i do own socks.

sister dressed me when i was younger for a halloween joke and as far as the caught story goes. it ended with me in the bathroom adjacent to my sisters room, which in turn had all the makeup and clothes on the bed so i assumed it was seen.

AND LAST...DANA...i, like every one else on the site come here for support and open minded people. not to be ridiculed by a condescending ass...

THANK YOU

[Shelly Preston]

Hi Girls

I am afraid lying is a little bit like fraud.
There is always someone with more information or a better detective or a better memory.
Liar should always expect to get caught soone or later.
If its a hypothectical situation just say so.

Please try to be as honest as you can.

Trust is hard to gain but easy to lose.

[KathrynW]

I simply asked some questions - my, my aren't we just a wee bit defensive?
Oh my...my...my....
And usually when one is unable/unwilling to answer questions, that means what?
Lemme give you a hint...
Rhymes with roll....scroll...poll...
hmmmm.... ? ;)

[KateW]

I do love a good bit of investigative journalism - good work ladies!

[Sophia Rearen]

Nikky, Giving support and open mindedness comes with some level of honesty. If you can't even be somewhat honest in this community it will be hard for people to give you support and trust or friendship.

I don't think any members of this site care to be led on wild goose chases when it comes to giving heart felt advice and friendship.

After viewing what Dana & Tamara pointed out regarding your post history I think you will find most people will feel a bit put off from offering you help in the future.




Nicely said Kathy. I was just about to offer some advice, then the thread went downhill. So sad, people feel compelled to tell such things. It's the heart felt advice and friendship, which Kathy speaks of, that makes this such a special place. Why would one try to ruin it?

[Ms. Donna]

:: sigh ::

Wow, it's just like Usenet - only with prettier colors! :rolleyes:

There will always be such people. Nonetheless, methinks Nikky has had a sufficient public flogging.

Just remember going forward:

Fool me once, shame on you - Fool me twice, shame on me.

Love & Stuff,
Donna

[ChristineRenee]

Yup...she's busted!! I think we have exacted well more than a pound of flesh here ladies. I'm not a mod...but here's a request for one of them to lock this ol' thread up before anymore public flogging ensues here...and thanks in advance!;)

[Julia Cross]

Just goes to reaffirm my comments on earlier posts. We need to take things here with a grain of salt. Often the whole story isn't told, or the story isn't told at all and we are mislead. It's really unfortunate. There is no reason to lie here, and there is no reason to be shy here. Using fictious names and regional locations makes all of us rather anonymous, wouldn't you say? And as others have said, if someone, somehow discovers your true identity here, you have to ask, what are they doing here if they are not interested in crossdressing?

Oh how I wish people would be a little more honest and open. This forum is an excellent resource and a great opportunity to have a meaningful dialogue with other like-minded individuals.

It's too bad some choose to abuse what is there to benefit them.

Julia

[HaleyPink2000]

Not being bad or trying to get into your
family buisness. But trying to help.

Since you live with your Mother. I would take it that Dad's out of the picture. Either divorce or dead possibly. With that said, I'd be as open to my mother as possible. Living either with a Wife, Mother or even sharing an appartment with anyone. You need to be able to come home! My meaning is when you come home there is a feeling of this is where I live. The rest of the world is outside.

Being open to Her would do the both of you a world of good. Also ask Her all about Herself. You don't know all about Her either. You may think so, But, being my age can tell you , actually you probably know very little of Her emotions eetc. I thought I knew everything at age 20 to 35. Gawd, did I learn loads from then to now.

Your missing your chance, don't blow it.

Haley:)