Real v. Fake?

[Robin414]

I've been running over Carla's thread 'Actual v. Theatrical' and made me think about taking the thought down a notch....Real v. Fake (don't get me wrong, I still fake it a lot...no not like that people )

I find I'm WAY more comfortable without anything that isn't what my momma gave me (i.e. no wig, no forms, no padding). I think I still rock a pretty femme look, I certainly don't 'pass' but knowing I'm being my real self is just more comfortable...getting 'clocked'...Ummm, clocked for what, cuz I'm a GM who happens to look like a GG...I'll fight ya (saw that coming )

I still go all in occasionally, and sure, I'm faking it and love it but I find the authentic look is so much less stressful and keeps the pink fog from blowing me over

I guess im saying...anyone else found a 'look that works'?

[Tracii G]

The way I dress people just think I'm gay I guess and they are right so what now?
Its just more comfy to be me than some regular dude.

[MissDanielle]

No one has said anything about my high-waisted skinny jeans yet.

[Mykaa]

Absolutely, Gap Bootcut jeans, Guess Western boots, I have both Black and Brown, (Stable is the name) or my Puma womens sneakers, Im a shoeaholic, I have several to pick from. Sometimes I go with a guy shirt but lately Ive went womens button down. I also have a guess leather jacket I wear out also. I also have gap always skinny jeans Ive worn out once so far.

[Rachelakld]

Nah, my GM mode just doesn't convert to GG in any way, shape or form, so need all the help I can get (although, with age, I'm using less make up)

[Teresa]

Robin,
To me the basic look for going out is wig, makeup and forms and something nice to wear, like I said to Carla, it's not an act it's my comfort level !
Is it real or fake ? Well I'm not a woman , probably half there but mostly I feel it's the real me, to others I'm possibly a total fake !

[Hell on Heels]

Like Rachel put it.... "Nah!"
Without the wig, and makeup, there is no second guessing.
I have done the wig, and makeup with some of my guy clothes.
Rockin Republic jeans, and the shirt is from Holister.
The OUTPLAY tee was a plain tee from Macys men's store
that I had custom embroidered.
Much Love
Kristyn

[pamela7]

for "real", it's the TS women, right? I think I only wore a wig like 5 or 6 times, and even make-up is rare for me, though I do love it. I very rarely pad out the bra, and I use flared skirts to create hip illusion rather than pads - have no pads. So for me, it's my authentic body, want to grow my own boobs, redistribute the weight lower down.

Btw, i reckon that pink fog blowing you over full-on is a little message that maybe just maybe you're landing in my pink lagoon one day, xxx

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Robin:hugs:, It's fake for me, without the forms & pads and the wigs & heels I just wouldn't make it.:daydreaming:

[Beverley Sims]

Naah! for me as well, Wig, boobs and light makeup work for me.

[Krisi]

Does it have to be one or the other? "Fake" is such a harsh word. Would you say an amputee has a "fake" arm or leg? Or would you call it a prosthesis?

In any case, without artificial parts, I look like a male and that's how it is supposed to be. Not super macho, but obviously male. I need long hair (a wig), boobs (forms) and an enhanced butt and hips (Veronica 5) to resemble a woman. That's fine, I am a MTF crossdresser, nothing more.

[Allisa]

I love my Levi geggings and now with warmer weather my capris with my canvas 1" wedge heeled "grasshoppers", V neck brushed cotton tops over cami's but always with my long hair(wig?),purse and maybe a touch of mascara, earrings, bangles and rings, nails polished in some color or gloss clear. Femme look?, can't be because I'm a male(at least physically).If every one thinks I'm gay than so be it, I don't live for their approval anymore, I'm happy and that's all that counts. Did I forget I love my maxi skirts also. So I guess I'm a real fake. But I do love to don the "girls" and put on my "face" and venture forth into the world, keeping it real as a CDer.

[cdterri]

No wig, no boobs, no pads. Have to wear a hat of some sort as I'm pretty bare on top but prefer to show the real me (man in a dress). I look very good in a dress thank you.

[Krististeph]

Not sure this is a questing that can be reduced to a bipolar answer...

a: I do not go out dressed often enough to opine on the matter.

b: gender is in the mind, and you know this.

c: plenty of women, while being GGs, are not 'in the market' or considered as a wanted person.

d: if you are feminine- spend some time and discover what it is that screams "feminine", and accentuate it

e: same thing here on the inverse- buffer the masculine appearance/behavior aspects. -- what is your goal- looking feminine? being feminine? attracting a male mate?

f: you know my avatar is not me- work with what you have. my best days are when I see myself as a girl, without the wig. But because i keep my hair as male passable, i do use a wig.

g; pads: mmm..: girls use them too.. duh. I like padded panties just because they remind me that i AM trying to alter my appearance, I AM trying to be something other than my male self, I AM seeking a feminine shape, I AM willing to adulterate my god given form to try to be the god given person my brain says I am, despite the god-given anatomy a chromosome and some hormones gave me.

no letter point: I will NEVER be a girl. I grew up with a penis. But I am neither a non-transgendered male (what the hell do we call them anyway, GMs? Ha!) I hold back because of my social/employment position for the next few years, and because my wife does not want to be known as the wife of a CD/TG/TS.

But I am more of a girl than so many females... (ad hoc defining girl as a feminine/social construct, and female as a genetic/anatomic evolution).

Heck, I teach both of my sisters, my muses almost, aspects of how to be feminine. Gentleness, lovingness, kindness.. these are all aspects of sisterhood.

So Robin-- if you want to fake it- I say go for it to the nth degree. Because you know it is fake. You are NOT lying to yourself, just accentuating the story. Heck, Reagan did it. And despite the critics, he dug us out of a serious crisis.

Robin- as long as YOU know that fake is fake, or that metaphor is a metaphor, you will survive and conquer. You will show that the yin is as least as powerful as the yang,, after all are CDs not an active mix of both yin and yang?

Do not dare to diminish yourself because you love the look of the artificial feminine. Most of our life is artificial, CD related stuff is no different. No better, and no worse. Deal with it.

Present as wild as you feel honestly comfortable with. And do not parlay to deceive. And you shall be the queen of reality.

And in reality, lies enlightenment.

[flatlander_48]

For me, it's kind of Either/Or: either I am in male mode or female mode. I do cheat a bit with male mode with shaping panties and Gloria Vanderbilt or Lauren jeans. Female mode is total: clothing, shapewear, bra, forms, heels, makeup and wig or hat. Presently partly male and partly female doesn't interest me.

DeeAnn

[Lena]

I never wear anything that adds mass. No breasts or hips. Of course, getting older and funky hormones (gyno) allow for a more natural filling.

[Secret Drawer]

Maybe in answering this question I explain something as well. I sometimes don't think I am a CD. I do the crossdressing, thus by proxy yes, I CD, but I really do feel fake only when I feel the need to put on the macho act, which is occasionally called for in certain social situations. (Such as with my in-laws, where the men go talk sports and the women go elsewhere.) I feel disingenuous as a male normally, but deal with it as my social situation requires. In my more female look I feel more genuine.
I seem to be a b-cup if I use padded bras, just no cleavage! I have a fairly decent shape if I remember the proper posture, so it isn't critical to pad the rest of my body. I would likely do makeup if I knew what I was doing, but I have not used wigs or anything. I guess I am what I am and who I am, but again, I am not thinking like a true CD, which seem to take a certain pride in pulling off a "closest thing to passing" possible look.
I think I am just really transgendered, so I do not identify with my being particularly "male" but may look the part of a man in a skirt, while in my own mind just dressing perfectly naturally to suit my taste for that day.
None the less, I would be willing to go for a real hardcore makeover someday, just to see how I would look. It may be overwhelming emotionally though, as opposed to fun...

[docrobbysherry]

I'm not a TS. Simply a CD. When I dress, I want see a pretty, shapely, young female in my mirror. Which I'm not in any way, shape or form!:brolleyes:

I dress all the way or not at all. My female look is almost completed created by cheating. "Fake" if u prefer? Wearing pads, girdles, leg and arm coverings, wigs, tite synthetic clothing, and strutting around on 5" heels is NOT comfortable. (Never mind my silicone prosthesis). But, I don't want it to be!:thumbsdn:

If I want comfort, I throw on my loose, cool, cotton drabs and boat shoes.:devil:

[Robin414]

Wow, awesome thoughts ladies, I was about to shout out a few but just too many! Ya, 'fake' is a little harsh, I knew that when I posted but I openly admit I shamelessly 'fake' it too so it's all good! 😉

[donnalee]

My hair is my own, breasts are my own (40C bra). will occasionally use shaper w/ hip pads to fill out a dress. No makeup (hands & eyes are too incapable at this point). I need to lose significant weight, so prefer empire waist dresses, usually floor length. I think I look good, but there is no doubt that I am male. I just feel more comfortable dressed than not.

[OCCarly]

My body is all real. No forms or pads. The only help I get with my figure is a 38B push up bra. Other than that, the curves in the skinny jeans and bodycon tops are all me. My head is a different story, though. I'm losing too much hair off the temples, so I wear a wig, and until I can get some facial hair removal going, I use beard concealer. I also wear feminine eyeglasses to hide brow bones. I try to go minimal on the makeup, though. Just lipstick and some eye shadow. My eyelashes are naturally long, so I haven't seen a need for eyeliner or mascara.

[Robin414]

Wow Kristyn, just saw the pics (ya, I use my phone a lot...), you're seriously Tom Boy hot girl...just saying!

[CarlaWestin]

There's nothing wrong with fake. Fake boobs certainly make my outfits look sexy.

[StarrOfDelite]

I wish that male pattern baldness didn't prevent me from wearing my hair naturally at shoulder length, but there just isn't enough left on the crown to cover the pink skin glistening through. So, a wig is a must for me. I also find that small breast forms, the chicken breast size, help to deflect attention from my shoulders, pects, and lats, which are all hyper-sized from weight-training. With the wig and the minimal padding I can look androgynous (which is how I like to project anyway), and feel Fem; without them I'm just a skinny old white guy who's spent too much time in the gym.

[Tina_gm]

A lot of women actually "fake it" but I am with you for the most part. One of several reasons I do not go out in public. If I have to go to such great lengths to "look" like a woman, it looses its appeal to me.

[DebsUK]

I went without a wig a couple of times but didn't find it was feminine enough so preferred a wig. I have nothing resembling boobs so need to pad and I always wore something to nip in my waist a little (Lycra, not boned). Thing is, these are as much about helping clothes fit better as "faking it". Besides, how many genetic women dye their hair, wear wigs, corsets, panty girdles, Spanx, "chicken fillet" boob enhancers? It also depends on where you're going I guess too.
For what it's worth I was trying for an androgynous look in drab for a while a few years back ( i eventually bottled it) though it was fun trying while it lasted

[Richelle]

I guess im saying...anyone else found a 'look that works'?

The look I found that works is just being my natural self. I am lucky that I have my own hair, small natural breasts. And now at my age very light facial hair color, so a close shave and no make up works for me. When I wear long dangling earrings, nail polish, leggings, tunics with lots of bling and color I am always treated as any other women out and about.

Richelle

[Jenny22]

I try to realistically fake it to be as feminine as I can be: Wig, beautiful, bouncy silicone breast forms, all lingerie in use, hold up stockings, shoes, lots of appropriate jewelry and makeup, all of which I love putting on. Even in male mode, when I'm driving, I will some times wear earrings, a necklace, yummy red lipstick, bra and small forms It makes me still feel girily. It may all be fake, but its what makes me feel so feminine. Love it all !!

[Dana44]

My SO does not want me to get any forms or wigs. But I have size B boobs and use a push up bra and it works fine. My hair is long enough to style and I go all naturally. I always have earrings on. Makeup is getting better and I am pretty accepted out there and I get called mam in drab mode sometimes. I have long nails and getting them painted for the Las Vegas trip. She tells me to go natural and that I do look like a woman when i am made up. Yet I am tall, she says that I'm a tall good looking chick.

[Ressie]

Wig? always
Makeup? you betcha!
hip pads? Haven't tried them, but I like the look
breast forms? love 'em and wear them

nails are kept short and painted when dressing up.
I've only experimented with false lashes and fake nails. They're both a PITA at this point.

I had beautiful long blonde hair when I was 18-28, but my natural hair isn't gonna work at age 62.

[sometimes_miss]

To me, the ones who complain the most about people who use 'fake', or artificially enhanced anything, are those who wish to eliminate the competition. Women with real D cups routinely talk down those who get implants. Women with real blond hair dis the bottle blonds. all in an effort trying to make people think the other person is worth less then they, themselves are.

I'm an equal opportunity guy. I don't care how people make themselves look good, as long as they do. Some are born beautiful, some have to work at it. Why look less appealing than you want to be? Just to make some other curmudgeon happy? No thanks.

[Lily Catherine]

On one hand I feel 'fake' is far too harsh and extreme a term (see Krisi on amputees). Yet on the other how I look as Lily is definitely not real nor unaltered: my hair is a wig, my bra is padded with towels, and I apply makeup quite often. (I dislike hip padding on myself.) These are definitely unnatural; without them my silhouette is decidedly male - I was born that way.

One term for an MtF CD in Chinese is 'false girl', however. Which has a fair bit of implicit perception behind it.

[phili]

I like to joke that I look like a Civil War vet- kind of craggy drawn face, lots of real estate sprouting hair, and grey wispy eyebrows. I'm tall, have broad shoulders and kind of a wiry masculine tension- so there is no way I will ever look or feel to others like a biological woman. However, as gendermutt says, gender and biological sex are not the same thing, and my mix of the two is going to have to be ok with others.

I think it has made it easier for others as well. Most people have some kind of fantasy or experience with cross-dressing, and if I am being frank about it, and not asking them to do anything special for me - like treat me as a woman or tell or show me they think I am attractive, then the tension kind of goes away.

I used to think I had to be a woman or look like a woman to have the right to enjoy the pleasure of women's clothes or to let myself feel feminine. Now I can clearly see that once we separate biological and physical characteristics from psychological gender, the way is clear for all of us to have a much better time!