I have a dileema

[Gloriamontrose]

My wife allows me to cross dress anytime I like. In fact I am more cross dressed than in drab. Last week we were at beach resort and although I was in drab, she was proposition by three guys. She was excited by this but said she said she was not interested but bought me some very expensive earrings and a reallt nice dress saying she's want's to see me in dresses rather than drab. Then the conversation drifted to the men who had propositioned her. I am aroused at the thought but also afraid at where it could lead. Anyone with any experience with this that might offer some guidance or advice.

Stephie.

[Tracii G]

Oh my I can see where this is going.

[Teresa]

Stephie,
In my circumstances I'd be pretty upset, despite my CDing, intimate relations with my wife are very rare, it's her choice not mine, I still have a great deal to offer. If she were enticed to look elsewhere I would find it very insulting.
As for joint encounters, that's between you and your wife, I guess once you go down that road there's no coming back, to eventually risk losing your wife in that way is something I wouldn't dabble in.

[Krisi]

You are aroused at what, the thought of your wife having sex with three men? Did your wife buy you the expensive gifts because she wants to have sex with three men?

Do you really think this is a good idea? Something good for your marriage? Is it something you will remember fondly when you and your wife are retired and sitting on the porch swing?

This would not happen in a serious loving marriage. Don't let it happen.

[Nikkilovesdresses]

Your wife's behaviour, and the dynamic between you, remind me of the Mad Men era...except you guys have it reversed.

Imagine for a moment a handsome husband who has been propositioned by 3 attractive women. He likes to have his wife dress the way he wants her to dress, and sometimes buys her expensive clothes or jewellery that fit his notion of what she should wear. Sometimes she feels that he buys her these things in order to bribe her into allowing him to 'have his way', and strangely she finds this quite exciting- though she isn't sure why.

My guidance and advice would be to talk over these dynamics with an experienced marriage counsellor, because I think there is some confusion in your marriage about who does what...and to whom.

Good luck!

[pamela7]

"Nikki very wise"

[Nadine Spirit]

Hi Stephie-

You are asking for guidance or advice from anyone who has experience in this sort of thing, but the reality is that you did not give us enough information to determine what sort of thing you are asking about. Several here have clearly made some assumptions about the situation and have advised against it. They have taken your story to mean that your wife is trying to buy you jewelry to satisfy you while she goes and gets satisfied by these three men. Which could be the case, but it could also be that your wife is wanting you to dress as a woman so that the two of you could go pick up men, which could also be the case.

Regardless of which it is, or an entirely different scenario as well, just because some here think that there are only certain ways for married folk to behave, if it is something that BOTH you AND your wife want to do, then just make sure that you are aware of what you are getting into as fantasies are often VERY different than reality.

Have fun!

[DanielleLee]

I think I have to agree with Nadine here on all points. There is one thing however that would caution you on and that's there aren't any take backs.

Once and if something occurs.. it cannot be undone. If the two of you move forward with this experience (combined, singular, whatever) and you discover it's not to your your liking... the two of you may discover its hard to move past it. Somethings cannot be unseen.

[ReineD]

I am aroused at the thought but also afraid at where it could lead.

You're aroused at the thought of what, exactly. You mention your wife's desire to see you in a pretty dress and earrings in the same conversation as the men who propositioned her. So I'm assuming you're putting it all together too, and imagining a threesome? If this is arousing to you, then why are you afraid?

[Beverley Sims]

Your wife may have been excited by other males attention but this does not mean she is going to go after them.

Attention from men is morale boosting but don't let the morals drop.

[Dana44]

I have had that experience. Once it starts where would it lead? Trust in a relationship is the most important thing. In my case my ex wife, went way too far and broke trust to pieces. Sometimes its hard to let the cat out of the bag. If you do anything like this, talk about trust issues first and foremost to know where you both stand.

[Tracii G]

If its OK for your wife to sleep with anyone then you still sleep with her go get yourself checked frequently for STD's.

[chelyann]

Gloria
some more information would help to give good advice

[Tina_gm]

Not sure exactly what or where your dilemma is here. She had said no to them.... but then you said it was exciting to you, as did she. So is there something here about you maybe wanting to watch, or be a part of it? Also, I am wondering, while it is super great that your wife now wants to see you more in women's clothes than men's.... is there something about this, the idea that she now sees you more as a woman, and that your marriage may be drifting off into more of a platonic girlfriend type of relationship, and that your wife now might seek out the attention of "traditional men"?