Tomorrow's the big day

[Liz57]

Probably not the most original of titles.

My wife and I have crossed paths a lot lately between traveling back and forth between our two houses and visiting grandkids and haven't seen much of each other. I had so hoped to spend Saturday night at the place where our timeshare is where we could go to the bars and not have to have a designated driver. On such short notice and being both Easter weekend and spring break there were no vacancies. Other options also fizzled for the same above reasons. So we'll be going to visit a big cat refuge Sunday and I let my wife know that Saturday I want us to go somewhere by ourselves, uninterrupted. We'll probably go out hiking or something like that although it looks like rain all weekend. I'm planning to come out to her, it's all that's been on my mind for at least a week. I've read a s load of posts and Marlas directions and made notes and have links on my phone for literature about cders. I'm as prepared as I can be and now I have to keep my nerve up and not chicken out. I feel certain she's known for a long time and it's been DADT all this time. She's not the kind to be real judgemental on these kind of issues, we both have gay relatives and she's pretty accepting about that. I feel very certain that she's committed to our marriage so I feel this is the right thing to do for me and the right time.

So girls, wish me luck. I hope to post soon about how well it went. I said hope, I know it could go very differently than I think and then the next post might be of a different color. Hopefully, my wife will soon get to know some of you if I can get her to join this forum.

Liz57

[Maria 60]

I hope it all works out. Most people know there wifes and most of all know the strength of there relationships. I read a lot of stories about wifes who don't accept and marriage problems start, but when you ask how was the relationship before they told them, most say there were problems already. Let us know how it went you sound very convenient about it. So I wish you the best of luck.

[DebsUK]

Good luck sweetie. Don't assume she knows via DADT. Not that it matters. If she knows, it doesn't make any difference if she approves or not. I don't want you to get your hopes up but you may be pleasantly surprised. Personally, my gf (now wife) was shocked by the revelation but she came round x

[reb.femme]

I'll keep my fingers, arms and legs crossed for you Liz. I really hope this turns out well for you.

Becky

[Mykaa]

I wish you Best of Luck & I'll Say a prayer for you.

[Liz57]

I should clarify something. In previous posts I mentioned that years ago I was going around the house shirtless and my wife came home on her lunch break. After she left I made a panicked look in the mirror and sure enough, my suspicions were confirmed. Bra marks were prominently displayed on my back and chest. She knows that at least once I was wearing a bra. This is why I say it's been DADT.

Liz57:battingeyelashes:

[Robin414]

Good luck Liz, keep us posted!

[Stephanie47]

I hope you are not setting your wife up for "uninterrupted" private time, a getaway weekend, only to be blindsided by a revelation she is only not expecting, but, also be totally unprepared for.

[Liz57]

I hear what you're saying Stephanie. I don't think she is looking at this as a romantic weekend away from home so much as catching up with each other. We're not going off so much as getting away from the house where I can talk without being interrupted. I already mentioned that I had something I needed to discuss with her so she knows that is why I had wanted go off. We'll just be off somewhere Saturday afternoon where I can talk. Sunday afternoon will be an outing to the cat rescue place with the morning for church and maybe breakfast out.

I appreciate your view point and I will think on that some and try to keep in mind what her expectations for the day might be.

Liz57:straightface:

[Teresa]

Liz57,
I really wish you the very best, you sound as if you've done your homework and have prepared yourself, if ever we can to make the final reveal.

My coming out was like opening the flood gates I've never cried so much in my life, at the time it was like a millstone being lifted off my shoulders, sadly it didn't go totally to plan but it did have to happen. The hiding , lies, deceit and the shame and guilt had to stop , CDing is part of me, the forum made me realise that it's for life I had to come to terms with it.

[Marcelle]

Hi Liz,

Good luck and I hope things go well. If she does know or at least suspect then that will move the conversation along quicker. However, if she does not know, this is a lot of information to digest so don't be surprised if she goes into silent mode in an effort to process what you are telling her. All this to say, if you plan to tell her when you are out hiking it may become a very awkward hike if she does go into silent mode and she may feel a bit trapped without the ability to just get away for a few moments to collect her thoughts. I would really advise to do the "big tell" in the privacy of a place where if she needs immediate time alone either you or her can leave . . . just a thought.

Cheers

Marcelle

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Liz:hugs:, I wish you all the best with your decision to come out to your:love:wife

Be sure to see line #4 in my signature.

Please do keep us advised . :daydreaming: