today at work

[Princess29]

Hi there
I don't know how many people remember but I work at an airport in australia operating metal detectors, x-rays etc. Basically what the TSA do in the USA.
Anyway, I was working at the domestic terminal this morning and was returning from a break. The guy who was covering the metal detector was staring past me and he said "that guy is wearing a skirt"
I said 'So?" and walked off.
There was a young asian boy of about 17 or so wearing a basic shirt and shoes and presenting as male but happened to be wearing a fairly tight pencil skirt.
As this person was approaching the screening point, that same colleague started saying "clever" jokes to my other colleagues like "hey, what is your ad-dress?" and 'do you tend to skirt the issue?". To be fair, this same guy is just as likely to make similar attempts at humour regardless of what any person was wearing and while it was stupid, it wasn't the worst thing I saw.
While this person was still at the screening point, one female colleague was absolutely wetting herself laughing at this individual and while I didn't hear the entire conversation, I know that her and another woman were laughing at this passenger. I don't know if it was that he was wearing a skirt or that he wasn't presenting a "flat front" in the pencil skirt or another issue.
I hope that none of this grossly unprofessional behaviour was heard by this passenger and I was very close to walking over and saying "Its 2016, grow up!" but then I had held my tongue. I was weighing up whether or not to go to battle over this. I mentioned it to the supervisor later and his response was "maybe he was scottish?"
So overall, it was an example of how crossdressers and transgendered folks have more work to do but I don't know if evolution or maturity will ever reach these particular individuals that I worked with today. If those pricks had to laugh at this person, wait till he is gone and walk around the corner.
I was absolutely disgusted with my colleagues today.
Transphobic and grossly unprofessional. We see people with all sorts of stuff in their bags and dressed all sorts of ways and with all sorts of ailments, conditions and personal situations and our goal should be to treat everyone with respect and not try to humiliate anyone but some of them still have a long way to go

[trisha kobichenko]

For sure, the whole world has a long way to go. As if those who are pointing out a person who doesn't fit the norm and laughing don't have something to hide deep down? Makes me wonder...

[sonialexis]

I always was vehemently against friends and family addressing a trans or gays as 'sissy' or 'fag', and would always oppose as best as I could and this was before I knew it was offensive. I feel your predicament and I too don't know what i would have said or done if were in your place.

[Heidi Stevens]

Your colleagues need to brush up on "native wear" for folks not from your region. There are areas in the Himalayas where it is still traditional for males to wear what looks like a tight skirt, mostly by Sikhs. Your friend make snide remarks about yamakas, turbans and kefijehs? Fijians wear a skirt sometimes, as do some Philipino.
You need to store this nugget of info and inform your friend the next time he makes fun of the way someone is dressed, it could be religious in nature. We already got enough religious tensions in the world than to have your colleagues trying to add to it because they are ignorant.

[Rachael Leigh]

Conversations at work can be very interesting and even though Crossdressing doesn't come up much I try to not say much when it does, it's not so much about outing myself but what am I going to say, hey I crossdress so what's your problem.
Trust me I've considered that before but just left it alone. Besides what I do we are not in a public place so we won't see people as such and what I do outside of my job is my business

[Pat]

It's a shame you missed a teaching moment there, but maybe next time. You don't have to be out there drawing fire but you can help promote acceptance just by steering the conversation when someone does cause a reaction. ;)

[Stephanie47]

I've said it many times in my posts that even legal protection does not confer acceptance. I am not surprised about the conversation. I've seen it many many times. When a person 'thinks' he or she knows you, they think you must 'think' the same way they 'think'. Yes, it can be a teaching moment without revealing personal information. Those individual without regard to their personal viewpoints need to be professional. If such comments were made in the federal office I worked in, those comments would be considered contributing to a hostile work environment, even if there were no trans men and women, gays or lesbians on staff or present in the office. When I encounter those remarks I do tell them to knock it off.

[Bobbie1952]

I know it's hard to speak up at work because of potential repercussions. I would have said that I found the behaviour rude and inconsiderate.

[Alice Torn]

I used to go to a very conservative church. One date, a fellow from another nation came in wearing a knee length black skirt. Nothing bad was said, as he told us he was from Fiji, and it is traditional wear. I think though, if i wore a skirt or dress, hose and heels and wig or no wig, I would have been taken aside, and told to leave, and not come back dressed as women.

[Lorileah]

My perspective is, if you wouldn't joke about your mother that way, you shouldn't joke about other people. Swap other words into what they are saying that make it racist, anti-religious, sexist (wait sounds like they do that already). NOW put yourself (your co-worker) in that situation where they are out of their country or element. If any of those things make you angry then you shouldn't say it about others. Besides after you go through that whole check list you won't have time to say it

[Robin414]

I'd take my co-worker aside and have a chat "dude, you're being t-phobic, read the news, that ain't cool anymore, I had a hot blonde chic explain that to me a couple weeks ago!" or something like that to add a potential 'reward' for acceptance.

Great post Princess, although our personalities might not always align, we're still in the same (relatively small) boat and when push comes to shove we all need to have each others back!

[BettyMorgan]

Regardless of the heritage of the person using the airport, his or her clothing or their gender, this is simply some jerks having some fun at the expense of another human being. Was it unprofessional? I'm not sure whether airport security screeners have a code of conduct or could be considered "professional" in any way, but I hope they are bound to guidelines by their employer as to how they must treat the public.
At the very least, it was rude and there is never a reason to be rude. If a person chooses to wear a skirt, then that's their choice whether they are a crossdresser, transgender, gender fluid, for cultural reasons, or none of the above.

[Marcelle]

My take on this is you work with some very small minded folks who need a bit of education on being a decent human being let alone being professional at their job. I have overheard people making snide remarks about others who happen to be different to which I normally tell them "If you don't have the courage to go to up to the person and tell them what you want to say to their face then you probably should not be saying it".

Cheers

Marcelle

[Teresa]

Princess,
It was good to hear from someone who works on that side of the barrier thanks for sharing.
I guess we all have stereotypes, you probably have one about us Brits , I always feel Aussies have an in your face, bawdy sense of humour, you've just dispelled that.
I'm pleased that you tried to correct them, maybe not so much against the TG community but their lack of professionalism .

If CDing were more accepted you could have suggested you wear the skirted version of your uniform if they do one. Marcelle has one and is proud to wear it !

I know the man skirt didn't catch on perhaps the guy was on a trial promotion !!

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Princess :hugs:, You just can't fix STUPID !

[mykell]

hi princess,
when at work one time someone i was working with for the third or forth time began to explain how he hoped a certain person was not going to be coming in the next week....he was thinking that i may of heard of this person but had no clue as i was working in a territory i normally did not work in, he tried to describe who the person was unsuccessfully and just ended with that freak who thinks hes a woman......i looked at him and said well we have one of those freaks in our family and then proceeded to watch him uncomfortably try to back step....he explained that he didnt mean it that way and i explained im sure you did....i was ignorant and intolerant too but because it was family i had to educate myself about it....it was fun to see him so uncomfortable and he didnt have to know it was me in the family i was referring to....i didnt truly come clean but i wasnt completely honest but i think i made a small difference for the person he was describing to me....

[Krisi]

Welcome to the real world. The idea of a man dressed up as a woman is strange to many, perhaps most people. Making jokes about it is not nice and it's not professional, but it's fairly common. I've even seen cartoons on the Internet showing what is supposed to be a "hot chick" standing in the X ray machine at the airport with her male parts showing. For the sake of your job, my advice is to ignore the jokes or try to change the subject. It appears your supervisor doesn't care about this.

Someone commented that you missed a "teaching moment". If people don't want to be taught and don't view you as an authority on the subject, you won't be teaching them, you will be arguing with them. It's not worth it and it's not going to change their views.

[OCCarly]

In this day and age, if you feel a need to make snide jokes about someone who is gender nonconforming, then you are too old.

Last weekend I was docenting an exhibit at a major state university. The exhibit was part of an art show/cocktail party for the university donors. I saw not one but two gender nonconforming males, one in women's jeggings, and the other in very skinny (probably women's) pants. I wore women's skinny pants to that same event, so that makes three. No one said anything. The older folks seemed to take their lead from the large number of millennials there who saw absolutely nothing wrong with it.

[grace7777]

Krisi,

If no one ever says anything, then nothing will ever change. Now we may not change their point of view, but at least we can let then know these jokes are unacceptable.

Grace

[phylis anne]

Hmmm ,
I realize this won't be ladylike:heehee: but some people just need a high 5 upside the head with a chair:devil:
hugs phylis anne

[Lori Kurtz]

If no one ever says anything, then nothing will ever change.Grace

True. The right thing to do, I think, the thing that would have the most powerful effect in possibly changing someone's mind, would be if someone like me were to say something like, "I guess you didn't know this about me, but I'm a crossdresser. So I don't appreciate it when people make fun at the expense of people like me." But I have to admit that I'm a coward. I've never said anything like that. I've never even had the guts to use the old strategy of "I have a friend who crossdresses."

But at least I have managed to avoid participating in the "making fun," and I have said things like, "I don't think that's funny, so why can't we just live and let live."

I admire the sisters here who are more upfront than me, and who are helping the world to understand us a little better.

[Krisi]

Krisi,

If no one ever says anything, then nothing will ever change. Now we may not change their point of view, but at least we can let then know these jokes are unacceptable.

Grace

Unacceptable to you perhaps, but don't expect others to care.

If you want to change things, the best way is leading by example. Don't tell jokes that make fun of others and don't laugh when others tell these jokes even if they are funny.