So, when it's DADT and IDW2SI........

[CarlaWestin]

Don't Ask Don't Tell and I Don't Want To See It

......... how do they actually feel about it? "He's a pervert and that's just not right?" or, "OK, I'll just pretend this doesn't exist?" or even, "You're not allowed in the woman's world!" possibly, "I can't cope with another female in the relationship. I guess you expect me to be a lesbian now, right?" Or even, "This just goes against what I've been taught as the righteous side of life."

How do y'all think about how they think?

[Sarah Louise]

I'm sure every SO is different but I expect most DADT is "I don't want to even think about you doing this" and most IDW2SI is "I accept that you want to do this, but I don't want to spoil your male image that I'm attracted to".

Just a generalisation, of course.

[Robin414]

Hmmm, being happily married nearly 30 yrs I think the relationship evolves to a point where gender is a non issue for the most part, you kinda become 'one'. That said though, for us late bloomers, crossing the DADT line is still tough...for nearly 30 yrs I've been the raging bull and presenting as a 'cow' in front of my SO is....weird, getting there but slowly 😉

[Rachael Leigh]

My wife has used the I'm not gay line before and I agree she's not nor do I wish her to be, I understand it's strange for me to enjoy wearing women's night wear and such but it's just something to sleep in right. I'm not talking something sexy here either just cotton tee shirts. Anyway yes I do my best to understand their perspective but when it comes right down to it I am stil just a man but one who just has little more flare

[RADER]

My wife was OK with me dressing; She would pick out outfits for me to get and
wear from the catalog's. I could even wear a baby Doll Nightie to bed.
She knew that I would never become a girl, so dress up was allowed, with-in
reason.
Rader

[Tonya Rose]

Seems to me that DADT and And Idw2ci is The same thing to me.....Glad i dont have to live in that world!!!! my wife was ok with my CDing from the start. 15 years ago. when we met!I was straight up with her from day one!!!!
.....

[Sheila11]

DADT and why did I find a black hair on the vanity?

" I'll just pretend this doesn't exist?"
"This just goes against what I've been taught as the righteous side of life."

These are my wife's 2.

[docrobbysherry]

The real curse of DADT is when they won't discuss it at all! Since my daughter will never discuss it, I have no clue what she thinks!:straightface:

[Teresa]

Carla,
I think the bottom line is she just wants her man back, now days I have to smile at that because she hasn't wanted a man for ten years. I appear to fit the role as companion and handy man, I'd love to be the total companion but then I get the remark that she's not a lesbian.

So many preach about the honesty issue, I would love to be totally honest with her, but then that works both ways, I don't think her silences over CDing are through contentment.