am I wrong in what I do

[Charlessa]

I'm a crossdresser. I'm a man. I don't want to become a woman and really don't want to even pass as one. I couldn't pass if I tried. I do highly enjoy wearing women's attire such as skirts, dresses, jeans and leggings. it seems as I'm the only one on this forum that does so. Am I wrong in yalls eyes for not trying to pass? Am I even in the right forum?

[Heisthebride]

Nothing wrong with that at all. You can enjoy your life and likes as you see fit.

[Tracii G]

If you like wearing the clothes I see no problem with that at all.
I wear womens clothes in boy mode and girl mode so to me they are MY clothes.
I have been doing it for a long time and people have gotten used to me being different.

[AllieSF]

Nothing wrong with what you are doing. If it makes you happy, is legal and does not hurt anyone else, go for it. And NO, you are not the only one here. There are many just like you.

[Charlessa]

it just doesn't seem like it on here to me. most seem to be passable. a few I've blew up and squinted at to get a close look! lol. but I've only seen a small number of member pictures. I feel like I'm doing nothing wron. I just wanted input from people on this site

[Tracii G]

Some days I'm more a guy and some days I go out in 100% girl mode (make up ,hair done,etc).
The clothes are the same. I don't think I pass but to me looking more like a female works for me.
If you don't want to present as a woman you don't have to.

[Teresa]

Charlessa,
I think what surprises me and maybe others here is that it doesn't go away with age, if fact it's for life. Also just dressing is what happens to many of us and then the need gets stronger to be out and the thoughts and need to pass come into the equation, funny thing is once you do get out the door that hurdle of passing appears to fade away. At that point it becomes more enjoyable because it achieves a balance, fear of being in the closet and being seen have gone and it starts to justify the money spent on female attire.
Much of this depends on partners or wives, mine isn't happy , knowing but not seeing go me go out the door to drive to my meetings has made her realise my feelings were deeper and stronger than she thought. The fact I have the courage to go out dressed has changed her attitude when she sees how happier and calmer I am.

[Tracii G]

I'll post these two pic and you can see the pic on the left is guy mode one on the right is girl mode the clothes in both pics came from the ladies dept right down to the shoes.
I don't think I pass like I said and it really doesn't matter to me.

[almalove]

No, your not wrong or the only one, as for me even though I'd love to pass, it's more that that, for me it's a personal feeling, I don't try to pass out there, I can't, I dress mostly for my self but when there is an opportunity to go out in a safe environment I will do it, other then that no way, it's my own love to dress up that I dress up for, so don't worry too much and just be safe and live your life, good luck.

[StacyCD]

It all depends on what you mean by passing. Upon close inspection I'll not likely be taken to be a woman. However, when I work on my presentation all I hope is that I'm treated just like any other person. Around the house, I dress in whatever I feel like wearing.

[prettytoes]

You are not alone in what you do. I couldn't pass in a million years. I simply like the pretty colors and the fit and feel of women's clothing. I am far more comfortable in a skirt than I am in shorts. I love painted toes, but I don't really do makeup. I am happy with being a man, I just like the clothing.

[AprilMayy<3]

This forum is for crossdressers. Some of us want to transistion, some of us only wear lingerie.
It's the wide scale of crossdressing that everyone who enjoys the beauty of womens clothing fits into.

[Mollyanne]

Hi there, NO, U ARE NOT WRONG IN YOUR WANTS, DESIRES AND FEELINGS!!!!!! We all have our own needs and wants. If whatever you do makes you happy, DO IT!!!!!

Molly

[mechamoose]

Then you are like ME

(nice choice on skirt and t-shirt)

Check my record and posts, you might not be as alone as you believe.

I might even be able to point out a few friends.

- MM

[Beverley Sims]

There is nothing wrong in what you do, if I go out I do wish to pass in some way so as I can avoid ridicule.

If you go out and people see you as a man and there are no repercussions dressed, then do what you will.

It is an individuals choice but I personally would not go out looking like a man in a skirt just to make a statement.

I am not saying that you do that either.

[Tabitha_Sinn]

Charlessa,

Do what you enjoy! That's what matters. If you don't want to try and pass, that's fine. You do this for you, not for anyone else! So whatever you enjoy doing, there's not a thing wrong with that. Enjoy!

[Lacey New]

Are you wrong in what you are doing? Well, to put it bluntly, there is a certain segment of society that would say yes, you are. That segment is what keeps many of us in the closet. And let's face facts. We are a very small minority. But,is what we do illegal or harmful? No. Everyone on this site has enjoyed dressing in women's clothing. Some more courageous and more public than others. That is why it is a site for cross dressers - something you and I both are. So relax sister, you are one of us and enjoy the ride.

[Mykaa]

Charlessa, guess what? I wear womens clothes all the time! and in guy mode, I have complete going out sets of clothing, I have been among freinds dressed this way and I got you look nice by a female friend, maybe its jeans and a nice shirt, I have a leather jacket to go too. Your not wrong in what you do, I will tell you the same thing a member and now friend told me, Mykaa your not made wrong and dont ever think you are. I say be happy and be yourself!

[Meghan4now]

Char,

While there is probably a larger portion of members who post a lot that are interested in doing a reasonable facsimile of a woman's presenentation, there are a number of members similar to your self. They may not have posted so much in the past few weeks, but they are here.

Right, wrong? If you have good relationships, and your dressing is a good representation of who you are, then I'm not sure how that would be wrong. May not be my cup of tea, I like to go the full presentation route. Do I understand your motivation? Not really, I don't quite get it, but that my problem, not yours. And even though I don't get it, I am not going to disrespect you.

Hang out, get comfortable. You ARE welcome here.

[Candice June Lee]

No you're not wrong, and no you're not the only one. Being androgynous is just fine. You have to do what makes you happy. You shouldn't be living for others and their feelings. There are many other good answers to your post. But I'll say this, be yourself.

[Kate Simmons]

Only you can determine what's right or wrong for you. Being true to ourselves is sometimes the most elusive goal.:)

[Fiona123]

Charlessa: I am middle aged with a hairy middle aged body. Not gonna pass any time soon. Any yet I dress en femme or underdress whenever l get a chance. You are not alone and there is absolutely nothing wrong with what you do. 🌺👩

[jennigrace]

I'm with you. I could never pass and don't want to pass or be a woman. I just love wearing girls clotheing especially panties, bras (w/breast forms) skirts etc.

[Charlessa]

I guess that settles this question. Thanks!

[Jenniferathome]

There are several here who dress as women from the neck down and are only men from the neck up.

[JenniferMBlack]

I go both ways lol sometimes I'm a guy in a skirt others I do now to try and pass but still really just a guy in a skirt.

[adrienner99]

You are certainly not alone. The percentage of CDs who truly pass is, I believe, quite small. In public I usually get ignored--not the same as passing. Don't worry about it. Just perfect your image to the extent you want, and be cautious if you do go out.

[mechamoose]

Shoot out the lights

[Steph_CD_62]

Charlessa,

I am like you to a point. I don't want to become a woman and I have no desire to pass as a woman. I also have no desire to even go out in public dressed, except I do wear panties everyday. I also have 2 pair of women's jeans and 1 woman's shirt which I have occasionally worn in public, but they really don't look feminine unless you look closely. My obsession is more lingerie, however I do enjoy wearing a dress maybe once per month.

[ambigendrous]

I guess I'm another one of the "only ones here" - I prefer dresses and skirts to pants, but have no desire to "pass". I'm mostly bald, have had a beard and moustache for over 40 years now, and have no desire to shave my face! I do shave my legs, belly, chest, and underarms because it looks better when wearing nice things. My wife and I have a standing joke: when she gets comfortable she takes off her bra; when I get comfortable I put mine on! I'm strictly a stay-at-home dresser, although I have been known to under-dress fairly often, and have worn a skirt out shopping a time or two, many years ago.

[nikkiwindsor]

Charlessa,

Oh, I think you most definitely have a home here! I enjoy the diversity inherent to our community. What a boring world this would be if we were all the same! Hope you're feeling welcome! :)

Nikki

[Robin414]

Hey, we all present to some degee en femme for a ton of reasons!

You might have a fetish for particular items of clothing, that's cool (I'd actually envy you 😠 )

You might have a case of 'incorrect erotic targeting', that's cool (I'd actually envy you 😠 ...again)

Or you might be in the 'gender vortex' (that sucks 😔 )

But you're certainly not alone! 😀

[franlee]

There is nothing wrong with you, you echo mine and many others on here and even far more that aren't and don't know about this forum. Passing is not essential to many and the target for many, it's strictly a personal objective and don't be surprised if you may change your mind after dressing and enjoying the finished process. I admire the fact you state exactly what you do know and have no problem with facing it. Seems that so many can't decide what they are and question it to the point it is an obstruction to their own happiness. Enjoy it and never regret doing it, but make sure you later in years don regret not do it.

[Rachael Leigh]

As many have said here no there is nothing wrong with wearing the clothes that you like and are comfortable in, going and trying to pass is a personal choice and as I say trying to pass because unless you already have good feminine features then you won't pass 100 percent anyway.
For me going out and trying to blend in has just been a natural progression of this side of myself and for some it happens and for some it never will.
Your in the right place here so just enjoy the group

[phili]

Hi Charlessa,
You also wondered if you were in the right forum- and you might want to check out Skirt Cafe- where men who like to wear skirts chat and specifically say they are NOT crossdressers! http://www.skirtcafe.org/forums/
Phil

[Charlessa]

Phili. I'm a member of that forum. I got in "trouble" because I had on a bra and mentioned bra and panties in a passing remark. I was even accused by a member of padding my hips! It is a great forum though. But I am a crossdresser. I just don't try to pass myself as a lady.

[Maria Blackwood]

Exactly the same here. CD is my sweet release after a long day of work. I don't go out much during the work week, so it's every late afternoon & evening in dresses and every night in lingerie. When I cross over, I just feel a sometimes inexplicable level of relief.


Hi Charlessa,
You also wondered if you were in the right forum- and you might want to check out Skirt Cafe- where men who like to wear skirts chat and specifically say they are NOT crossdressers! http://www.skirtcafe.org/forums/
Phil

They should wear kilts. Guy at my work, a big stuffy corporation, wears one once in a while and no one even blinks. I don't know him well. I've wanted to ask if the kilt is a specific clan tartan, because I have some Scottish ancestry, and we might be mortal enemies. ;-)

Edit: ok, popped over there, and they have a kilt forum. There ya go.

[daviolin]

I'm a lot like Tracii. 99% of my clothing are feminime. Its all I wear these days. As Homer Simpson once said about panties. "Its a comfort thing". Yes its a comfort thing to me to. Daviolin

[Ceera]

Do what makes you comfortable and happy. Nothing wrong with that, as far as I am concerned. There are several others here who do it just as you do.

Personally, I love presenting fully female and doing my best to pass. But I know that isn't for everyone, by any means. There was a time in my own CD history where I still had a beard and hairy arms, chest and legs, and I felt there was no way I would ever pass, unless I was in a costume with a mask that completely hid my face, my arms, my chest and my legs!

Now? I have no beard, I have a shaved body, and I've developed much better skills with makeup and arranging my clothes, and have learned to do a passable female voice. I think I can pass quite well now, and the responses of strangers confirm it for me. But it took me a year or two to get those skills.

But I don't always present female, and when I am in male mode, I do like wearing some girly things. Now as my personal preference, I don't like the idea, for myself, of putting on a dress or a skirt or an obviously feminine blouse or pair of decorated jeans while otherwise presenting as male. That's just my personal preference, for my own behavior. I don't mind at all if someone else wants to go all out with the girl clothes while otherwise presenting male. It's just not what feels right for me. If it works for you, that's great!

Now for example, yesterday and today, I am in male mode. But I have my fingernails and toenails painted. I am wearing pierced earrings. I am wearing ladies sandals that show off my painted toes. And I am wearing plain ladies jeans (with no embroidery or other girly decorations) and under that I'm wearing panties from the ladies department. The only 'male clothes' I have on are a belt from the mens department, and a unisex t-shirt. And I'll go out like that and interact with my neighbors or go to the grocery store or the bank, with no qualms at all.

Each of us has to find our own comfort zone with whatever urges are driving us. And each of us are different, and those urges may or may not change over time. Right now, I feel much closer to you than I do to those sisters and brothers on this site who have an extreme gender dysphoroa issue and know they absolutely must surgically change their body so their outward gender appearance matches their mind and spirit. I really feel for them, and count myself lucky that I don't feel such a disconnection from my assigned birth gender. I can be comfortable with living part time as a woman, and trying to pass when I do cross dress, and spending part time as a male (my birth gender), while not resorting to hormones or surgeries to change my body to female. Might I eventually go further? Maybe, but I doubt it.

Others may find they do need to fully transition, or to fully pass, or to attempt to pass, after earlier experiences closer to where you are now. Or they may decide that what they do now remains right for the rest of their lives. What was comfortable and right for me has changed over time, but it doesn't have to change for everyone. It is your mind and your body, and no one else can choose what is right for you.

Life is a journey, and we each have to walk our own path. Walk yours proudly, and be who you want to be.

[NotSoSocial]

If I were to give myself a title, I guess crossdresser fits it the closest. I don't really dress up because I want to be passable, I just want to be cute lol. I guess I'm passable, a lot of people actually think I'm a girl so I guess that's what the term means. I don't like the idea of being a female or male, but I don't feel wrong in any way.

[prabha]

Jenniegrace , you are right,I could never pass or be a women.
Cross dressing in born to me ,Ade this is the right place for any TG ,CD and their well wishers.

[Mollyanne]

there is nothing wrong in what you do or how you feel. We cd'ers come in all forms but the one thing we all have in common is the fact that we all LOVE to wear female clothing. I personally have been cd'in for over 50 yrs and have accepted me as me.

Molly

[~Darla~]

You are not alone. I feel much the same.

[Sarasometimes]

Fine with me. I could easily skip the desire to pass if I wan't so sure my life would explode if the 2 worlds collided. I think I was born a male tomboy. I would wear women's clothes and do the girly activities but still be all male at other times. No such endearing term exist for me so i try to blend which is fun too. Just much more prep time.
Welcome and please do share with us you adventures...

[Charlessa]

Long as we all make ourselves happy. That's all the matters in my opinion. I've been in my garage making sawdust all day. I know I'm fixing to dress down and get comfortable

[jacques]

hello Charlessa
you are perfectly RIGHT to dress the way you wish
luv Jacques

[Rachel05]

I absolutely love to dress in female clothes, love sexy underwear and underdress very often, i also like wearing heels, dresses, skirts etc etc etc

Wil i ever pass as a woman, i doubt it very much does it make me feel really nice to be dressed as a woman, you bet it does

I do my going out mainly underdressed and often drive in heels while i am out underdressed and I consider myself as a cross dresser

This has been part of my life for close on 50 years now and I enjoy it more and more as I get older and feel totally at home dressed in my female clothes

This forum has helped me realise I am not alone and certainly not unique which has helped me tremendously

We all do what we need to do and we are all different, I would love to be able to pass and go out as a woman but I can't get the look, but what look I have makes me happy, so I am content for now