Clueless things we've said to women that make sense now.

[Mylie Taylor]

As I transition to full time en femme, the thing that has irritated me the most, that I have been so guilty of in the past, almost like a karmic drop kick, goes something like this:

Me: "I love the way this new skirt looks on me! I feel great!"

The guy: "Yeah that's sexy. You know what I think is hot?..."

I dont care what you think is hot right now, appreciate ME, not your porn fantasy blowup doll that you want me to be. I have been sooooo guilty of this too and now I know how it feels to be on the other end and why it's infuriating. I've been in touch with my femenin side and have used it to have great relationships, but still I'm finding small things that are big deals. Anyone else experience this?

[Mayo]

A sense of perspective/empathy can be a wonderful thing :)

[Alice Torn]

I can relate, though a very part time Cd. When i put photos in ads, guys almost always say similar things, to me. Like that's nice, but i want to see whats under that dress, between your legs, yada yada. I never made such comments to women in nice clothes. I always applauded the way they were dressed. But, i am 62, still alone. Can't win.

[Jenniferathome]

... appreciate ME, not your porn fantasy blowup doll that you want me to be. ...

I'm confused. This offends you but your avatar is clearly a sexualized version of something.

You also state that you are going full time "en femme" does that mean you identify as a woman and will live your life as such? Or do you just plan to cross dress 24/7?

[Mylie Taylor]

Offended is probably the wrong word, I don't mind being sexualized or what have you, I would say my beef is more with the guy not being tactful. Like, give a compliment first and find out what I like about what I buy. As far as living en femme, I won't be doing hormones or surgery.

[StarrOfDelite]

Prefatory remarks, so this story makes sense: I often wear swimmer's underwear, the kind of thing that is like a skimpy pair of tighty-whitey's, but without the Y front. They are about 10% Spandex and fit tightly because they're meant to be worn underneath long, hip-hugging swim trunks with long wide legs. The do a really good job of giving me a flat front, and are comfortable.

A couple of weeks ago, while I was chatting on the phone with my boyfriend, I told him I was going shopping and asked him if there was anything that he didn't like about the way I dressed or did my makeup and I would grab something he liked. His comment, "You look great, but I'd rather you wore some sexy panies, like pink thongs instead of those white things."

So, like a ninny, in addition to a couple of flouncy summer dresses, and some makeup that was on sale, I also bought two pair of pink bikinis with perforations in flower patterns. They do look sort of sexy, but my underwear wasn't what I was thinking of when I asked the question.

Now, the thing that really has me thinking is, "If a GG asked me that question under the same circumstances when I was presenting as a male, would I have ever told her what kind of underwear I like her to wear?" And, then, if the answer is "No," what are the reasons, are they cultural, sociological, or hormonal?

Alas! The difference between men and women, and also between men and M2F Trans males?

[Zooey]

Alas! The difference between men and women, and also between men and M2F Trans males?

Be very careful. I'm going to assume you meant to just leave it at "the difference between men and women".

[StarrOfDelite]

No, I'm echoing the sentiment of Richard (Alice) Novic to the effect that Trans males are not and never were the same as straight males Sorry if that gets your shorts in a knot, but it's a legitimate comment that perhaps I phrased inadvertently. If you have an issue PM me and maybe you can show me the error of my ways.

[Lorileah]

maybe you had the letters reversed? And asking if FtM's developed the differences?

[Mylie Taylor]

I think we may have stumbled upon inception here; I'll call Leo. You ladies are all so gorgeous omg 😽