FtM friend.

[susmitha]

Has any of my CD sisters had an FtM (either CD or transman) as boyfriend? I have not had that experience. But I would very much like to.

[Kate Simmons]

What would your expectations be for them?

[Tracii G]

Not yet.

[PaulaQ]

I'm engaged to a trans man, and because of my local activism, I know lots of trans guys. My Pat is a pretty typical dude. He's cigar smoking, beer drinking, baseball watching (he loves the Red Sox), guy. He's a veteran, and a cop. Like trans women, there are all kinds of trans men, arrow straight and hyper masculine like my Pat, to feminine or even gay or bi. Lots that I know are just regular dudes. I would say that Pat has pretty much all the cool masculine stuff (strength, protectiveness, decisiveness, toughness), and virtually none of the negative stuff. He doesn't feel the need to prove himself, be the big swinging dick in the room, he's not misigynistic - he really respects women. Some trans guys can be just as horrible, or worse, than cis guys, but most I know really are a cut above as men. I really respect and enjoy the trans guys I know, and if a guy who knows who he is and has had the confidence to fight the world to be who he is sounds like your deal, then you'd be lucky indeed to snag a trans man.

If you have questions, I'm happy to answer them.

[susmitha]

Paula, you are lucky. Have a good life.

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What would your expectations be for them? I expect him to treat me as a woman, just the way he should treat a GG. I am a bit old-fashioned. Please don't mind it. He should consider me soft and emotional. He should respect me. He should be humorous. I love if he praises my beauty. He should initiate most of our conversation. If we are into lovemaking, he should take the initiative and act as the dominant partner (but without hurting me). He should take most of our decisions. His decision should be final, but he should consider my opinion also. In a restaurant, he will order for me also, after asking me. The list can continue.....

[PaulaQ]

You can find guys out there like that susmitha. In many respects , that's how it is with me & Pat, although I am a pushy broad, and that is a challenge at times. Luckily, I am feminine in lots of ways he does appreciate, and so things work well between us. Who I am lines up pretty well with who he is. (I'd say extremely well, but I'm an intimidating woman. I may be sweet, but I'm also that woman about whom some people think "Oh *bleep* it's HER!!!" That he can handle me as I am so well says a lot about how strong he is as a man. A lot of men could not handle me, or at least wouldn't enjoy it.