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View Full Version : How to make 'Girl'-time?



BayBeeBlue
07-15-2016, 08:53 AM
Hi.
Just wondering how all you girls find time to dress up fully including make up heels wigs etc.
If you read my post "mid life crisis....end of marriage" you'll now what stage I'm at.
Although, I would be breaking the rules my wife has set in relation to my CDing/tight fetish, I really am getting strong urges to dress in full.
The problem is that with a family of 4 young kids (6-17years old) and my wife who isn't fully accepting as yet(he hopes) .... there is little or no time for me to have girl time totally alone for any real length of time ie more than an hour!
I don't really have any friends so I can't even say I'm going to meet Paddy or Mick.
My wife hardly ever leaves the house and when she does she's only gone for around an hour.
I know my wife & I still need to discuss my issues further but I'm not rushing it.... I just feel that the urges will get the better of me and I'll end up doing something harsh/stupid. If you read the other post it may help where my head is at.....if it's at anything.
💄💅👗👠💋

Jessica1983
07-15-2016, 09:45 AM
Hi I have the same problems as you I dress maybe once a month if I'm lucky wish it was more

Joan58
07-15-2016, 10:02 AM
Had the same issues when my kids were home,just have to hang in there and get what little time you can,

Soon they will be grown and out of the house, believe me the time you have children at home flies.

AllieSF
07-15-2016, 02:13 PM
To find time you have to make time. That is to occasionally find a way to have some personal time to do what you want, whether that is to play football, jog, swim, go to a hobby club meeting, or whatever. No friends, then ask yourself why and be honest to yourself. Personality issue, try to change it, shyness, introvert, try being more open and friendly by forcing yourself to talk to people, whether the local pharmacist, bartender, grocery store check out clerk, who ever you run into. With some friends/acquaintances you have a reason to get out of the house to visit. The same goes for a hobby. Just because you have never had friends or hobbies does not mean that you cannot find and enjoy one.

As long as a hobby or time spent with friends is obsessive and over done, no one can tell you not to do that. So, what I am saying is that you may just need to change your daily routines and life style a bit to create those opportunities where you can sometimes take advantage of them to be yourself. Only you can do that by taking those first and sometimes difficult steps to be more independent of your current lifestyle. Did you notice I did not mention anything about dressing? If you can create this "you" time for more social normal things and activities, it will also help create some "the other you" time. Neat trick, huh?

janec
07-15-2016, 02:30 PM
i manage to about an hour twice some times three times a week when my wife goes out to fitness club she knows about my dressing and is happy for e to do it while she is out mabe one day she will accept and i will be able to dress when she is around

Sometimes Steffi
07-15-2016, 09:06 PM
A few years ago, I used to go out with a small group of CD friends to a trans-friendly gay bar. I told my wife I was going out drinking with the guys. Basically true, but not the whole truth.

I got tired of telling my wife this story, and decided to tell the truth. Now I tell her I'm going out with CD friends. Since we have a DADT relationship, she doesn't ask who I'm meeting or where I'm going, as long as I tell her when I'm leaving and when I'm returning. As long as I give her a week or two notice so she can make hr own plans, I can go out a couple of times a month. And that little group of half a dozen girls is now about 60 to 70 girls.

Janine cd
07-15-2016, 09:25 PM
I'm lucky to be able to dress at least once a month. This weekend has been very wonderful because my wife is away until Sunday. Needless to say, I'm using the opportunity to try on some new outfits and makeup.

sometimes_miss
07-15-2016, 09:41 PM
Explain to your wife that you need some time to do this every week to 'get it out of your system'. Get her to take a day out with her friends, enroll your kids into some type of activities, to just get them all out of the house.
Then go to it. Put some of these on the exterior doors if necessary: https://www.amazon.com/Rishon-Enterprises-Addalock-1-Piece/dp/B00186URTY/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1468636552&sr=8-1&keywords=hotel+door+security+lock
to avoid anyone coming in when you're in an area where you can't escape without being 'caught' dressed. Cheap insurance against disaster. Other temporary locks like that:
https://www.amazon.com/Calslock-Portable-Door-Travel-Lock/dp/B00GMPFCNC/ref=sr_1_6?ie=UTF8&qid=1468636552&sr=8-6&keywords=hotel+door+security+lock

https://www.amazon.com/Port-Lock-Latch-Protector-pack/dp/B00J7A7ZFM/ref=sr_1_59?ie=UTF8&qid=1468636845&sr=8-59&keywords=hotel+door+security+lock

BTW, anything that you can't whip off in a minute can easily get you caught. Make up, lipstick, nail polish, and anything that you might forget to remove when the 'emergency' moment arises (like earrings, necklace, rings, watch). If the occasion ever arises (UPS man, friend/neighbor at the door unexpected, etc.) make sure you strip in front of a mirror so you don't miss anything. I used to keep a trashcanliner folded up with a pair of thin Gym shorts in it at the back of the bathroom undersink cabinet (roll it up real tight, doesn't take up much room, and it doesn't contain anything weird; my preplanned excuse for having it there back when I was married, was that I usually walked around naked when I got out of the shower, and just wanted to have something there in case anyone came home while I was taking a shower); should anyone come home unexpectedly, I could run to the bathroom, strip, change, and stuff the bag in the back of the cabinet, to be retrieved as 'garbage' in order to get it out of there asap should the person(s) coming home had to use the bathroom right away.
Edit: I used to keep something like these in my car, locker at work too, in case I forgot to take off my nail polish (and I always made sure I had a small bottle of acetone in several places in the house, too, explained as used to remove ink, marker, and other things). Saved me a couple of times.
https://www.amazon.com/Polish-Remover-Pads-Contains-Acetone/dp/B00011JXR4/ref=sr_1_3_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1468637938&sr=8-3&keywords=nail+polish+remover+pads

BayBeeBlue
07-16-2016, 02:38 AM
WOW! Soooo, I'm not alone on that one then.....phew!
Thanks for the great tips.
I think I've figured out a way to kill 2 birds with the one stone - figuratively speaking, of course....😂.....I need to give up smoking and so will have a plausible excuse to go do something like walking or whatever.
I have a hobby or 2 that I enjoy but they are solitary ones.....but could be amended.
I am friendly but tend to keep to myself ... not sure why....I used to be a social butterfly (imo)...I got let down by (so-called) friends in the past so maybe it's a trust issue with people that I have....can also be amended.....and sometimes I just can't be bothered with other people's "stuff".....as my mother used to say..."I've got enough on my own plate".
My wife doesn't have any friends either.....I'm sure we seem like freaks to you all.....but we spend ALL our time together...to a fault, I think.
One of my biggest fears is the scenario of forgetting to take something off and being caught. Or I get to a point where I actually get good at putting make up on and making myself presentable and then answering the door with some missed spot of make up....cringe!😞
👗

Jane G
07-16-2016, 05:17 AM
A little hard to relate to your situation. Though back when I was in the Navy I had to plan and find time to dress. There was so much else on going on though, that I never recall it being much of an issue. My kids have known I dress since they where quite young. So nothing to hide from any family members. The only advise I would offer is to keep it simple, Don't invent some alternate life where you dress away from your normal life. That's not always easy in the short term. Communication trust and honesty are what form and maintain quality long term relationships.