Call Me Madam

[Starling]

This might be a little silly, but folks have been noting a drop in posts, so I thought I'd pose a question. Of course it encourages me to be called ma'am and she when I am out as myself. For years I hid in the closet, but as I become comfortable in my own skin, hoping to go full time, I sometimes forget what I look like. Lack of self-consciousness is a good thing, I believe; but have you ever spaced out a little and been startled for a sec when a waiter addressed you as ma'am?

:) Lallie

[flatlander_48]

I'd say the first time or two was a bit of an eyebrow raiser as it hadn't happened before. But subsequent to that, the reaction is hardly noticeable externally. Mostly it is an internal glow. I think what's happening is the realization that I'm still me, only with a different veneer. It is the same persona independent of presentation. Once I leave the house, I know that I am prepared and I typically don't agonize about how I look or what I'm wearing while I'm out. I'm just wearing my clothes; no more, no less. The only thing that I'm really self-conscious about is being steady on my heels. I walk with a bit of an odd gait under regular circumstances due to an arthritic ankle with limited movement. When I wear heels I have to remind myself to take it easy and control my steps.

DeeAnn

[grace7777]

Being called ma'am is something that makes me feel good.

[Starling]

Me, too. I'm talking about a brain fart.

:) Lallie

[STACY B]

That's Funny you say that,, Went and checked into a Motel recently on Vacation with the Grand kids and walked in alone the others were in the Car wore out of course,,lol,, Walked into the Lobby and went up to the counter an told the Lady I wanted a room, Of course the first thing she asked for was ID,, I then took it out and handed it to her it was my Drivers Licence and she looked at it and asked me is SHE with you,, I said WHO,, She said HER,, I said that's ME,, I looked sideways and she saw the Ponytail hanging out the back of my Bandanna I was wearing on my head and said Oh,, You have your hair up,,lol,, I said yea,, We just Laughed,,,,

So I feel ya,,, Sometimes I do forget that the Magic does work over time,,lol,,Live life and just do your normal thing,, It all comes in time.

[Claire Cook]

I was taken aback the first time that it happened to me. I was in a line in a grocery store and an clerk opened up a checkout. He said something like "Ma'am, I can help you here." I didn't realize that he was talking to me. I have now accepted the woman within and am totally comfortable with it. As others have said, it is so nice when that happens. Once in a while I will be addressed that way when in drab, perhaps because of my clear nail polish and female wedding ring. I take it as a compliment.

[PretzelGirl]

One thing that surprised me after transition was not reacting to referential words. If someone said Sue, my head turned right away. If I was in a meeting and they said her or she, there was a delay and then my brain went "Oh, me". Mother, daughter were others. It was surprising as I had been out and about a long time but I guess everyone around me would talk straight to me instead of about me to others, so I hadn't gotten used to it.

[Mirya]

Being called "ma'am" is nice, but being called "miss" is better. :)

[I Am Paula]

I've been out and about for so many years that ma'am (or similar) doesn't phase me. However, when I legally changed my name, I often spaced on being called Paula. Off in another world, that can't be me they are addressing.

[flatlander_48]

Being called "ma'am" is nice, but being called "miss" is better. :)

Generally true, but at my age I would wonder about some ulterior motive...

DeeAnn

[Georgette_USA]

Being called "ma'am" is nice, but being called "miss" is better. :)

I used to get irritated when people started to use Ms instead of Miss. I worked for the title of Miss.
I understand when SAs use Ma'am for respect. But it now makes me feel old. That is what my mother told us to use for older women. I still do when I see others, but when did I become a Ma'am.

[flatlander_48]

but when did I become a Ma'am.

Life is sneaky that way...

DeeAnn

[Starling]

...Off in another world, that can't be me they are addressing.

Exactly what I mean.

:) Lallie