Feels weird when I crossdress

[Megan.]

Hi there everyone can some please give me any advice every time I crossdress I mean completely clothes,makeup,wig,etc I still feel like a man I don't seem to be able to change myself mentally can anyone give any advice if they have experienced this thanks.

[Kate Simmons]

Who says we have to change mentally really? Just have fun and enjoy it. That's what I do. :battingeyelashes::)

[Bobbi46]

First off the one thing you should not feel is weird. To dress is a beautiful thing to do and experience. When I am out I have to concentrate very much on a feminine walking style so changing mentally when dressed in one way may not be required, it is as one feels within themselves. Also do you feel pretty when dressed, I do very much so.

[Halflifecrysis]

I haven't had the chance yet to do the full dress with makeup and wig and i am not sure what i will feel like when its all said and done and i look back into the mirror...what i do know is that i have waited so long to do this...and to just get to that point willl be such a huge relief. I do not expect to feel like a woman in womans clothes...i just want to feel what all woman feel when they look in the mirror after the time and effort they put in...and say hey, i look pretty damn good. Dont have expectations...its the best advise i can give you...just enjoy the moment...enjoy your efforts...the rest will fill in based on that. Have fun!

[Jenniferathome]

Well, you still are a man. So what's to change?

I'm a dude 100% of the time. When I'm dressed, I do not "become" a woman nor do I identify as one. I am a cross dresser. Isn't that what you are was well?

[jentou]

I think it has more to do with you being comfortable dressed. Do you like what you see?.I remember the first time going dressed to see my therapist and I was so nervous. The next time it was not such a big deal and she even mentioned how I seemed much more comfortable. I realized then that I am still the same person on the inside no matter how I present myself to the outside world

[Pat]

It takes a lot of effort to crossdress "completely," why do you do it? There must be something that's driving that behavior, right? What is that? If crossdressing is filling some need for you, then examine that need and why it's apparently not being fulfilled when you don't crossdress. In the end you can only feel like you, right? You can't know what other gender identities feel like because you only have you to draw on. So it's not surprising that you don't feel like someone else. I think the trick is to feel more like you. ;)

[Rachael Leigh]

I love this discussion because it really is the core of everything we do as a crossdresser and I'm going thru a stage now that I'm completely comfortable dressed. I can't explain it but I do seem to see myself as a woman but just as Jennifer says I'm not I'm a man but I for some reason when I'm fully out I do feel like a women.
I do understand feeling weird I think we all go through that but after a time it will go away

[sometimes_miss]

Not sure why you would want to 'change yourself mentally'. Or do you simply want to feel like you're a woman because you currently don't feel right about wearing the clothes?

[Amy Fakley]

I don't know of I "feel like a woman" in any sort of scientific sense. Obviously, never having been a genetic woman, I can't know what that really feels like, but I can tell you that there is a feeling that I get when I settle into girl mode, and it is distinctly different than how it feels to be in boy mode ... and that this feeling is deeply connected to my soul in fundamental, inescapable ways.

I think it's as much a mental state as it is about how I'm presenting and what I see in the mirror. Sometimes I will get dressed and not have that feeling ... that is usually when I am feeling highly paranoid or stressed ... but given about an half hour or so to "settle in" it always feels like ... well ... wonderful.

If you're feeling wierd when you dress ... maybe you just need to give yourself some time to settle in? On the other hand, if it's always felt wierd for you ... why do you still do it?

[SexySarah0727]

I don't know if this is what OP meant, but I know when I first dressed fully for the first few times it was awkward. It felt kind of like I was wearing a mask I wasn't meant to wear. Like I was trying to be someone I wasn't meant to be.

For me this came down more to worrying about societies standards and what others would think of me, but it was definitely an uncomfortable feeling. I was very self-conscious when I was younger and always worried what others thought.

Once I stopped caring what others might think and started doing my own thing because I that's what I wanted that quickly changed. I no longer feel awkward even going out in public dressed and I don't have to be fully dressed down to makeup and all and love and embrace my feminine side.

[NickyCD]

Hi there everyone can some please give me any advice every time I crossdress I mean completely clothes,makeup,wig,etc I still feel like a man I don't seem to be able to change myself mentally can anyone give any advice if they have experienced this thanks.

Its not about feeling like anything but yourself. We must stop trying to fit ourselves into the one thing we are trying to escape: The gender-binary.

[franlee]

You don't change mentally, that is what ever it is. The fact that you realize that seems to straighten your choice of CROSSDRESSING, it isn't a magic pill. It's something we do because we like and/or enjoy. It may grow into something more as time goes on but it is what you make of it mentally and physically with practice and resolve. Patience and acceptance is the Key to enjoying it. The anticipation and "Rush" is what fuels my own continued Dressing, always has and still does. So in short if you enjoy it and want to do it, think it through and then do it. Understanding or justification is optional not required. Trying to reason or even rationalize CDing is a hindrance and will drive some people crazy, for in the end it doesn't matter it's a personal thing unless you decide to share it. Simply put Enjoy and Get over the Why Crap. Oh one more thing do yourself a favor and don't fall into the what am I or labels game, you are what you are a man in a dress enjoying what ever it "is." No more no less as long as you keep it real.

[Teresa]

Megan,
It depends what your CDing is based on and what your needs are ! I feel I'm fulfilling the needs of the female part of me but I don't become a female, part of me is content being dressed but the man is still there , mentally he'll never go away he just looks different. The voice doesn't change, some of the mannerisms may do , it is more than an act , it's allowing your female side to come out into the open.

Franlee,

I'm not sure I agree with your blanket statement about just being a man in a dress , some of us have been through counselling so we do have to accept some labels, I know I have GD and I'm bi-gender, so there is a little more to it than just a guy in a dress.

[NancySue]

When I partially dress i.e. panties, bra, hose, which is most of the time, I am a guy who simply enjoys the comfort of whatever I've chosen to wear that day. However, when I dress completely, yes it takes time, especially if you do all the things a woman does, it seems to trigger my feminine side. I have a supportive wife who I watch and try to simulate her motions, walking, sitting, primping, etc. She offers suggestions for which I try to copy. It takes a lot of practice, which is enjoyable. We laugh about our similarities and differences. She hates underwire bras...I love them. She won't wear pantyhose...I love to wear stockings, thigh highs & pantyhose regardless of the weather. Our joke..."I can't wait to put on what she can't wait to take off. Her definition of "comfort" is 180 degrees from mine. So, who knows? Do what makes you happy. Someday, your feelings may change....or may not.

[Megan.]

It takes a lot of effort to crossdress "completely," why do you do it? There must be something that's driving that behavior, right? What is that? If crossdressing is filling some need for you, then examine that need and why it's apparently not being fulfilled when you don't crossdress. In the end you can only feel like you, right? You can't know what other gender identities feel like because you only have you to draw on. So it's not surprising that you don't feel like someone else. I think the trick is to feel more like you. ;)

I'm not sure I just feel the need to do it but am not very comfortable when I do

- - - Updated - - -


I don't know if this is what OP meant, but I know when I first dressed fully for the first few times it was awkward. It felt kind of like I was wearing a mask I wasn't meant to wear. Like I was trying to be someone I wasn't meant to be.

For me this came down more to worrying about societies standards and what others would think of me, but it was definitely an uncomfortable feeling. I was very self-conscious when I was younger and always worried what others thought.

Once I stopped caring what others might think and started doing my own thing because I that's what I wanted that quickly changed. I no longer feel awkward even going out in public dressed and I don't have to be fully dressed down to makeup and all and love and embrace my feminine side.
I am always worrying about what people think of me I am very self conscious

- - - Updated - - -


I don't know of I "feel like a woman" in any sort of scientific sense. Obviously, never having been a genetic woman, I can't know what that really feels like, but I can tell you that there is a feeling that I get when I settle into girl mode, and it is distinctly different than how it feels to be in boy mode ... and that this feeling is deeply connected to my soul in fundamental, inescapable ways.

I think it's as much a mental state as it is about how I'm presenting and what I see in the mirror. Sometimes I will get dressed and not have that feeling ... that is usually when I am feeling highly paranoid or stressed ... but given about an half hour or so to "settle in" it always feels like ... well ... wonderful.

If you're feeling wierd when you dress ... maybe you just need to give yourself some time to settle in? On the other hand, if it's always felt wierd for you ... why do you still do it?
I do it because I like to look pretty but something always feel wrong

[mechamoose]

I'm in the camp that cross dressing is outwardly expressing internal feelings, period. The desire to transform or transition is an extension of that. Some of us have it stronger than others, some to the point where the disconnect is debilitating.

I dress to allow a self image to flourish. It is a repudiation of some of the image messages I put out due to my gender, size and strength.

I will admit that I have never gone 'the full monty' and shaved, donned forms and tried to appear female. I *think* because I'm believe it would not look in the slightest bit convincing. That does not stop me from wearing women's clothes, it just stops me from trying to tell an unconvincing story.

- Kitty / Moose

[sometimes_miss]

I know when I first dressed fully for the first few times it was awkward. It felt kind of like I was wearing a mask I wasn't meant to wear. Like I was trying to be someone I wasn't meant to be.

See, I get the exact opposite feeling. It didn't start out that way; for the first few months I think, I always felt more as if I was simply learning to do what I should have been doing all along, it evolved into feeling like I only felt normal when I WAS dressed as a girl. And that's where I am today.

[Barbara Black]

If you are dressing to 'escape' being a male, even if it's for a short time, Relax, enjoy the feminine clothing while you are dressed. Truth is, you cannot escape being male mentally, the most you can hope for is being happy with where you are at the time. To fight it is to lose the battle right off.

[Fiona123]

When I dress I feel feminine, I don't feel male. Also, while there is a sexual component, I also have feelings of contentment and "rightness." Have fun and enjoy it -- that's good advice!🌺👗

[SexySarah0727]

See, I get the exact opposite feeling. It didn't start out that way; for the first few months I think, I always felt more as if I was simply learning to do what I should have been doing all along, it evolved into feeling like I only felt normal when I WAS dressed as a girl. And that's where I am today.

That's how I feel now, but the anxiety of worrying about someone finding out and my psychological state at the time made it very hard to feel that way at the beginning. But you have to realize, I felt that way with a lot of things when I was younger.

I've always been smaller and never really been into sports or typical guy stuff, so I was picked on a lot as a kid. A lot of it was just because I was small and not as masculine as a kid, a lot of kids made fun of me just for being small and in gym classes there were plenty of times the jock kids didn't want me on their team because "I was as useless as a girl", so when it came to dressing it amplified those anxieties. Triggering thoughts like "maybe they're right and something IS wrong with me".

It took a lot of time and and a lot of work before I became a strong enough person to say this is who I am and everyone else can screw off. Now that I can do that I feel more comfortable as my feminine self and feel like I'm putting on a mask when I go to work as a guy or have to dress as a male for a family event and such.

[Diversity]

Nothing wrong with your feelings about being a man when you are crossed dressed. I am a man all the time I am dressed. I just enjoy wearing women's clothing and find it fun to do. For me, it is just that simple to explain and understand about my motivations for doing so. I just enjoy wearing women's clothes.
I wish my wife could enjoy me being happy in this regard..... 👙👗👠💅🏻💄💋

[ClosetED]

When you do dress completely, do you look in the mirror and still see a 'man in a dress" or do you see the woman you always hoped to look like? You say you like to look pretty but something is wrong. Can you explain what you feel is wrong?
I don't change mentally but do feel happy to express my inner desires in an outward appearance. You may feel guilty about having to hide this from others, but that is to protect them due to their misunderstanding and fears, not from something bad you are doing.
Hugs, Ellen

[Tina_gm]

I have no change in mentality either when I dress. I only have a feeling of comfort and relaxation.

[Megan.]

When you do dress completely, do you look in the mirror and still see a 'man in a dress" or do you see the woman you always hoped to look like? You say you like to look pretty but something is wrong. Can you explain what you feel is wrong?
I don't change mentally but do feel happy to express my inner desires in an outward appearance. You may feel guilty about having to hide this from others, but that is to protect them due to their misunderstanding and fears, not from something bad you are doing.
Hugs, Ellen
im not sure i think i look pretty good but my self confidence is very low and always has been i think deep down it is my self confidence.

[krissy]

HEY HI
just enjoy what it feels like to you we all have those feelings but hell i know i cant stop i love it to much its important to us all.i just accepted myself it took 50 years to give in oh how i wished i didnt lose all that time to dress:hugs::^5:

[Vikky]

Hi Megan

When I dress fully (other than makeup – don’t do that) I’m not sure I feel like a woman, but I do feel very feminine and that’s good enough for me.

Just enjoy it, however you feel.

Vikky

[ClosetED]

So going back to a few prior threads, you have not posted your face, just neck down shots. This is the safest place on the web to find out how your face looks. If you now think you look pretty good, then this place would be a good ego boost with the confirmation of it. If not, we will give helpful suggestions. Many of us have low self-esteem, especially in our drab selves. We hope our presentation of a prettier person will help with that.
So show us a nice happy face!
Hugs, Ellen

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Megan:hugs: Maybe a little SRS and FFS will help you feel like a Woman,
Other than that like the rest of us you are just a guy in a dress...:daydreaming:...

[docrobbysherry]

Don't know if this helps, Megan, but I can't see anything masculine or I'm grossed out. Which is the reason I go to extrordinary lengths to hide my male self. When I look in the mirror, I see a female. Not a man in a dress or myself. On the other hand, I still feel like myself. A man in address.

[Tracii G]

You don't HAVE to change, you are still you no matter how you are dressed.
I don't change mentally when I dress in girl mode.
What does change is the walk and the mannerisms at least for me thats what happens.

[Sister Rachel]

Since I came out, first to my wife, then to close family and friends, I find that I don't actually dress very often, sometimes now it feels that it was a phase that I passed through over 50+ years! Conversely, though, I think I'm gaining, belatedly, a far deeper insight into what it is to be a woman.

Sorry, drifting off-topic a bit and being self-centred ..

Advice ( for what it's worth ) .. be yourself and don't get hung up about being "one or the other" .. enjoy pretty clothes and love your sisters, cis or trans :)

[PattyT]

I too still feel like a man when I crossdress, but so what. I'm a man dresed up the way I have always wanted to. Sometimes I'm a bit offended by the term "crossdressing." So what if I wear female attire? The GGs often wear what would easily pass as male attire but no one calls this crossdressing. You don't have to feel like a female at all to enjoy crossdressing. You just have to enjoy donning female attire.

[sara.rafaela]

Hi, I am like you too. I think your feelings are ok. I feel like a man. I am just a crossdresser. I enjoy the clothes, shoes, getting out. To me the experience feels more like a short exotic vacation.

[Stephj]

I am just a man that likes wearing a bra and panties don't have no desire to a female just enjoy wearing what I like just enjoy being me and doing my own thing

[Louise DK]

Well I dont see anything wrong with feeling like a man in a dress. After all, I guess thats how I feel when I dress i feminine attire. I dont feel like a woman, I dont really know what being a woman is suposed to feel like. If asked, I even have a hard time describing what being a man feels like.
I dont think being able to change mentally, is something you shoud have to do, to be a "proper" crossdresser. I think some can and some cant. I certainly cant! What I can do though, (or try to do), is change the way I move about, change my mannerisms, losen Up a bit you know. So that I LOOK More like a woman.:daydreaming:

Feeling like a woman, thats for My wife to do!

Louise

[Madilyn A.]

I don't change in any capacity except into clothing which makes me feel more comfortable and relaxed when I dress as Madilyn.