Urgent Advice Needed.....

[Anne Charlotte]

Do I come out in work ?

[genevieve_ohara]

No...if they'll fire you.

Yes...if they'll just stare.


G

[Jennifer Ivy]

Only if you have another job lined up already, and are "out" there.

[Julie]

Anne, only you would be able to gauge the reaction of your employer and work mates on this one. By asking the question I detect some doubts so the answer at this time is probably no.

Julie J

[Nikki A.]

It is a very tough question, indeed. If you are in a civil service position you may have some governmental protection. However in the private sector while the same protections may exist in theory in actuallity you would be at the mercy of your employers bias. Only you can guage the atmosphere at work. If in doubt, keep your private life private unless you are willing to accept the consequenses.
As for myself, I would not come out and admit it, although I kid our secretary that we should go out shopping. Be careful, what is done can not be undone.

[stoopy]

If you can stand the reaction of coworkers -- you should be legally protected from the boss. I had the experience as the employer -- can you believe the irony of that!!

My partners -- who are seperated from me by my closet -- checked with the lawyers and we were told it was not only not a basis for firing but we had to provide restroom facilities to our transitioning employee. Ended up putting a sign on the mens room for when she was using it.

My heart was with her -- too bad she was a sucky employee both as a guy and as a girl.

[windycissy]

If you lived in sunny California, you would have the absolute right to dress up at work! A new law that went into effect January 1st prohibits discrimination against crossdressing employees. Read On (http://snurl.com/skirting)

[babe4life]

too bad she was a sucky employee both as a guy and as a girl.

Isn't that just the saddest thing? One thing that I have a severe problem with is incompetence in a person's job. Or, even worse, being lazy and not caring.

Annie, good luck with whatever you choose to do. If you really want to go ahead, speak to the appropriate HR-type person (HR, boss, etc) before doing anything further. Must be someone you can trust completely. One of our newer forum members did something similar not so long ago and I really hope she picks up on this thread and shares her experience. If not, I'll have to hunt her down and make her talk! Ve hav vays und means ... (Sorry Kew!) ;)

Love,
Vicky

[Julie]

Do I come out in work ?

Anne, whatever choice you make please keep us informed, having asked the question we worry.

Julie J

[jessicadiane]

If you lived in sunny California, you would have the absolute right to dress up at work! A new law that went into effect January 1st prohibits discrimination against crossdressing employees. Read On (http://snurl.com/skirting)

Wow.I really need to move to California because I doubt Utah would ever get a law like that here :(

[Anne Charlotte]

I've been working myslef up to telling one of the girls in the office about my dressing.....more for an approval than anything else I think, and because despite my greatest wishes, approval isn't gonna come at home.....

I had one of my devil-may-care heads on when I posted.......and actually got into the office, but one of my male colleagues was there, and I just couldn't do it then......either through fear or the prevailing of common sense......

Jesus that was close.........thanks everyone for your concern........I must go now and write out some lines ..."I must not be an arse...I must not be an arse"

Sorry for scaring you all <hangs head in shame>

[jessicadiane]

Anne,
Don't feel bad. We have all been there in one point of our life. We will always be here for you when you need us and feel free to share your feelings anytime

[babe4life]

Annie, don't worry about it. I have gone through the exact motions more often that I care to remember. Came VERY close to doing it today again too. Maybe one of these days :)

*hugs*

Love,
Vicky

[Julie]

Thanks for getting back on that Annie, I've been thinking of you since you posted. I and the others will excuse you from lines.....ONLY THIS TIME. :)

Julie J

[Georgette]

Don't worry about that if you own the company The only thing I worry about if the employees see me. :p :eek:

[~Tammy~]

If you lived in sunny California, you would have the absolute right to dress up at work! A new law that went into effect January 1st prohibits discrimination against crossdressing employees. Read On (http://snurl.com/skirting)

This is also true in the UK.
By law here, you cannot be fired for crossdressing or any other transgender issue, much the same as you cant be fired for being gay.
Though obviously issues with your work collegues are a different matter.

[Amelie]

I've been working myslef up to telling one of the girls in the office about my dressing.....more for an approval than anything else I think, and because despite my greatest wishes, approval isn't gonna come at home.....

I had one of my devil-may-care heads on when I posted.......and actually got into the office, but one of my male colleagues was there, and I just couldn't do it then......either through fear or the prevailing of common sense......

Jesus that was close.........thanks everyone for your concern........I must go now and write out some lines ..."I must not be an arse...I must not be an arse"

Sorry for scaring you all <hangs head in shame>


If it was tough to talk to a colleague about your dressing, it will be just as hard showing up for work dressed. My advise,,, I would keep the job seperate from the dressing until you are more confident. It might not be worth it to lose your job over. I would just dress for the fun times, ex. shopping, nightlife, or whatever. Just enjoy your life, don't put to much pressure on yourself.
Love Amelie

[Wenda]

Hi Anne, some of the other girls have raised the pertinent question..'why do you want to?' I 'sub-dressed' a couple of times, and just found that it was too distracting. My employer is paying me for 100% of my abilities from 8:30 until 5:00 pm, and when I am sub-dressed, my head is not 100% in the game.
For some, it is a question of challenge, if someone says 'you can't", they will go for it, no matter what. For others, it is a point of principle. I don't feel that the labour laws are the point. What is your commitment to your job, and why do you want to dress? If you just want to make a social point, join a group and march with the others.
Remember the axiom "Pick a battle that counts, and pick a battle you can win." For me, this is not a hill I want to fight and die on. I want to have fun and feel feminine. wenda.

[babe4life]

Wenda,


"Pick a battle that counts, and pick a battle you can win."

Excellent. People must never tell me not to do something without a *very* good reason. I weigh up the consequences and jump in heels and all! That may have something to do with my Aquarian nature ;). I was chatting to a GG colleague who shares my birthday. We are so similar it is SCARY. Both can be rebellious, incredible empathy for others and so on.

So bring on the challenges!

Love,
Vicky

[Rachel_740]

Hi Anne and Girls,

It looks like you've sorted yourself out now Anne, but for information for yourself and other UK girls, there are 2 peices of legislation that protect you as a transexual in the worklace, or anywhere else you happen to be. The first is the sex discimination act. This doesn't just cover a GG who feels she's been discriminated against, but it covers transexuals too.

The secondd peice of legislation in the UK is the gender recognition bill (brought out in Jan 2004 I believe), which, as a transexual, and with the support of the sex discrimination act, apparently makes you (probably) the safest person in your workplace.

I hope this is helpful to someone out there.

Rachel

[Sweet Susan]

What a scary thought! I don't think I'd ever do that. One has to have some big cahonas to pull it off where I work. The harrassment would be endless, and there really wouldn't be much room for relief. Just because places like California have laws prohibiting bugging people who crossdress, doesn't mean it won't happen or ever stop. Gotta have tough skin, thick too. Be careful about those thoughts.

[Rachel_740]

Hi Susan,

I agree with you there. Although the law protects you in the UK, that doesn't mean that you won't get any greif from other people at work (as I will be very surprised if I don't when I get to that stage, hopefully in a few months time).

Also, although the legislation is there in the UK, it's obviously not something that you would be wise to keep throwing at an employer everytime something happens that doesn't suit you.

Rachel