Feeling "girlish"

[Kate Simmons]

This is for CDers only. When you dress totally en femme and go out do you feel "girlish"? That is do you feel like you think a woman may feel when she is herself? Some pass rather well and have the mannerisms to match. Do such mannerisms come naturally to you while en femme or did you learn them by observing the movements of women moving naturally about and then practicing? I will post my observations of myself with this after I hear from others. :battingeyelashes::)

[leannejacobs]

I feel girly when I'm dressed, however how I look to others I've no idea, my mannerisms do change automatically and I do confess to having watched how women walk and hold themselves, I've tried walking with a swinging arm and have video taped myself, it just doesn't work for me, it kind of shows how broad my shoulders are and I can't get my elbows in far enough to look natural, many women walk with their arms folded, clutching the shoulder strap of their bag which is what I tend to do, works for me

[NancySue]

Do I feel "girlish" when dressed? Absolutely. Mannerisms came easily and through observation, help from my loving wife, a full length mirror, and lots of enjoyable practice, including taking videos of myself, I've come a long way. You think you're en feminine, until you see the first few videos. It's fun to laugh at your self. When I've captured a movement or mannerism, we smile. When we go shopping, I will sit in the mall and watch other women's movements and mannerisms, take notes and practice when we get home. YouTube has some excellent "how to" videos. Practice, practice, practice is the answer.

[Alice 23]

When I dress entirely, I strive to act as feminine as I can. I still have to think about how I walk and sit, but some other things come naturally, for example lifting long skirts and dresses as I step over things. And yes, I do observe how and try to learn from other women naturally do things. One thing I've done is ask my SO point blank, "How do women bend over to pick some thing up?" Or "How do women do this?" Or "Am I doing this right?" Luckily, my SO is very accepting, and she's made a great coach.

As far as feeling girlish, it's hard not to when wearing perfume and I can't see my feet due to breast forms. :battingeyelashes:

[Dana44]

When fem, yes fem. That is the girl or woman characteristics that we do and try to be. When fem, yep feminine in walk, actions and carrying yourself. With heels on it is awesome that your hip subtly naturally swings. So, yes we are feminine and that defines us as girly and sure feels that way. And yes when you have purse it is easier to walk naturally.

[Angie G]

I don't go out but when I slip into A dress or skirt with hose I fell very girish.:hugs:
Angie

[Teresa]

Kate,
When I go out I'm not sure if I feel girlish, what I do realise is the difference from being dressed as a man. How different it feels just going out of the door to the car and getting in and then how a hem line and heels look and feel when driving . When you arrive the act of getting out the car and collecting your bag, dealing with the wind and rain from the car park into the hotel, finding your purse to buy a drink, maybe check out the hair in a quick visit to the toilets . I admit most of this is being dressed in a dress or skirt and dealing with the different set of circumstances it brings, do I feel girly ? I guess I'm acting like one simply because of the clothes and shoes I've chosen to wear , it's no more of an act than GGs do in the same circumstances , maybe they get slightly more annoyed because they do it more often !

[Helen_Highwater]

There has been a number of similar threads recently discussing do you feel like a woman when dressed and in the past I've been guilty of saying that I do. However it did strike me that it's impossible for me to know what feeling like a woman feels like. I'm not a female.

I certainly alter my mannerisms, walk and I definitely feel different. As Teresa says, putting on heels and a skirt or dress requires a change in how you go about things. It is however more than that. It's a change that happens deep in my psyche. My internal rhythm alters. I certainly wouldn't say I become more "girly" as to me that has a certain frivolity to it. Womanly, mmm a better description as I feel that implies a level of style and engagement with the world around you.

One thing I would say is that I become more self aware but that again in some respects is driven by the clothing. Perhaps the question is are GG's driven in the same way?

[SherriePall]

Yes, I do feel girlish when out and about en femme. I do have some of the mannerisms naturally when dressed -- it's almost a necessity such as sweeping a skirt beneath me when sitting or pulling my top down every time I stand or after bending over. I also feel I think "girlish" when in conversations with sales people about clothing items or make-up in a manner I do not when drab.
Kate, when do we hear your answer?

[Lorileah]

Does girlish imply not mature? Acting like a young female would act in public? The idea that woman act or are different than men is a social construct and hopefully going away. I fear that when this type of subject comes up it really implies that dressing is more a playtime activity or fetish which so many disavow. As noted, feeling anything but feeling you would be questionable. Maybe "acting in a manner you believe that women should or do act in public" is really what you are saying?

[JanetM.]

This is an excellent question and anyone who crossdresses is always aware of their feelings when in public. I have watched a ton of YouTube videos of crossdressers. I always watch real girls/women and observe the way they sit, stand and especially walk. As a guy I walk like a bear in the woods but when dressed, I must concentrate on a fem walk. There are some training videos out there on how to walk like a fem by shifting weight to the forward portion of the foot and the way a fem swings their arms. None of this comes natural because you put on a skirt, bra, top and wig. I have to think about each motion such as sitting down, standing up, holding a purse, etc. This is such a great adventure. It is almost like becoming a completely different person for a short period of time.. But to me it is not natural.

[Diane Smith]

How can I really know? I did not grow up with the socialization of a female, but I was often called out for my perceived feminine mannerisms. So that part comes naturally. But as for "feeling" like a girl, I've never been one, so I don't and can't really know how they "feel." Actually, I think there is probably more difference between individuals' emotional states and thinking/reasoning patterns than between male and female groups. I have rarely met anyone of any gender who would do things or think their way through a problem or situation exactly the same way I would. (Of course, my way is right!)

- Diane

[Tina_gm]

Girlish.... or feminine I feel regardless of how I am dressed. Dressing in women's clothes is just a reflection or an expression of how I am feeling.

[MissTee]

In my early days of dressing I believe I over compensated gesture wise. Walking, hand movement, stance. Not any more, though. After decades of dressing I'm just me anymore, and I'm sure some of those gestures I once deemed fem are a part of the me I have become over time.

[Kate Simmons]

For years when I was a closet dresser I took keen note of how my wife acted and how she accomplished her various moves. I made early videos of myself lip syncing female singers and practicing feminine moves. Upon re discovering that tape a few years ago I noted that that was when I established my basic femme moves I still use today. I also watched my wife dress and put on makeup, she was my best teacher on womanhood without realizing it. I practiced female moves until they more or less became second nature when I was en femme. Eventually I came out with my own style, joined a TG Org and started going to the local LGBT club. I was taught to dance en femme by a couple of gay female friends and eventually developed my own signature female moves on the dance floor. I think dancing free style has given me my best exposure to female moves and mannerisms.Even with all of this I don't feel "girlish" per se but do feel I can express my liberated feelings openly and that is a win-win scenario. :):battingeyelashes:

[docrobbysherry]

I feel fem occasionally. But never ever imagined I felt what GGs feel.

[Curiouser&Curiouser]

This is a neat topic, and dovetails into some of the conversations I'm having with my wife right now. I just started dressing, and came out to my wife a few days ago, so this is not only very fresh but I'm also a neophyte.


As noted, feeling anything but feeling you would be questionable.

Lorileah, I'm not sure what to think about this comment, maybe you could help me understand - as a new dresser I really don't know where I lie in the spectrum of crossdressing and TG behaviors. When my wife, who is worried, asked why my first pair of heels were "trashy" 4-inch heels, I realized that their is definitely a playtime element to my dressing and I'm not sure there's anything wrong with that. My male persona has many facets - I enjoy pretending I'm a little like a lumberjack when I'm splitting wood a couple times a year, and my wife certainly enjoyed dressing trashy when we went to that club a couple years ago.

Exploration, discovery, and freedom to try on new roles is a big reason I'm attracted to crossdressing, and creates nuance and beauty in my life. I understand for many it has become an ordinary part of their life and I hope I have a chance to experience that for myself at some point, but there is a real sense for me that right now I feel like a little girl trying on her mother's heels and lipstick.

I'm sorry if this is a little off-topic, but my wife and I were talking about this last night and it feels good to put these thoughts down on... webpage? I'll go with that.

Thanks for listening!

Sandra

[Teresa]

Kate ,
Your question has just reminded me of a conversation I had with my daughter. We touched on my style of clothes and wearing heels even to drive in. She has a fairly quite nature but has a good figure, not overweight but she admitted she just can't do "Girly !" She struggles to feel comfortable in a dress or skirt and tries not to wear heels if she can avoid it. I often think it's a shame because she can pull it off , it may be a confidence thing or it's just too easy for women to look good in trousers without the problems skirts and dresses can bring. To us it may be fun or enjoyable, maybe girly but often impractical .

All I can say is what ever does drives the female side of us it is very difficult to control sometimes ! But don't we just love it !

[Kate Simmons]

Girly is as girly does Teresa. It doesn't really matter if we personally feel "girly" or not, it's whether we have fun with it or not. :)

[Teresa]

Kate,
Silly question, of course it's fun, and certainly more fun being out and about !

[MissVirginia-Mae]

I am always wanting to feel more "girlish" and to that end, I always have more of a sway to my hips and carry myself like a lady when dressed....
However, its starting to encroach onto my drab dressing and I am glad I am going to be transgendering shortly

[Krisi]

I don't know how a girl feels so I don't know how I could feel "girlish". At my age it wouldn't be girlish anyway, it would be "feminine" or "womanly". Again, never having been a female, I don't know how I could feel "feminine" or "womanly". I don't think changing clothes or even strapping on a pair of boobs can change how a person feels.

When I dress as a female, I will try to look and act like one as best I can, but it's an act.

[Margaux81]

I would say yes! My hands move differently then the way I cross my legs changes all without me even thinking about it.so yes cross-dressing does make me feel girlish and I'm loving every second of it. P.S got my first real breast forms today!;)

[Scarlett Viktoria]

I've only been out a few times but I would say yes I do feel quite feminie, maybe more so than a woman only because I'm hyper aware of EVERYTHING I'm doing. There are times when I feel like I'm being too masculine so I try ro adjust accordingly. But I'm always observing women's mannerisms in hopes of picking up on more and more subtleties.

[Alice Torn]

At 62, i do not feel girly, but like Krisi said, womanly some. an older woman/man.

[Brianna Robyn]

In terms of mannerisms, some are forced as the result of the heels, skirt, hair etc... Walking and sitting are examples. Others come from within me as a result of how dressing makes me feel. A continuous smile on my face is the biggest example.

I don't think I try to make any special mannerisms, for me everything just happens.

[Debra Russell]

....as Teresa said - and when I am out and dressed I feel very feminine, girlish - well maybe a little. I don't consciously try to emulate feminine mannerisms as I feel they are dictated by my apparel; I do try not to walk too fast or take too long of steps .... and if I try to speak it doesn't make any difference anyway I instantly become a man in a dress :doh:.................................Debra