Am I becoming feminized?

[Andrea2656]

Yesterday my wife said something to me that caught me off guard. She said the I was acting more feminine in my mannerisms.

I am a "stay at home" crossdresser but my wife is onboard and supportive. (We were in Italy in May and got me a necklace.)

I consider my en femme and drab different ways that I encounter the world. I do not underdress. I am happy to go for a period of time (not too long) without dressing.

I thought that I actually kept the two personas separate. I realize that I occasionally will double-crossing my legs when in drab. I don't think about it. Do other have issues keeping the girl and boy separate?

[Curiouser&Curiouser]

This is an interesting question - for me, I only just started dressing and told my wife a few days ago, but I certainly am much more aware of my own mannerisms since starting dressing. And it does feel like a few are more feminine, but certainly not all, and less when I'm not paying attention. That said, I've had some more feminine mannerisms since I was young: my carriage, leg crossing (my legs are more slender - i cross them more than my wife does), sitting on the couch sideways with my legs up (think 'Titanic art pose')... so there may not be quite as much change for me. At least not yet... It may just be that your wife sees you with more observational eyes, and is noticing your latent "feminine" behaviors even though they have not changed significantly.

Sandra

[Lana Mae]

New to this and still trying to get feminine mannerisms down pat!! Been male for most of 64 years!! This might take awhile!! Do catch self doing female hand gestures at times ( in male mode!!) But hey, I just started this last year (beyond panties that is)!! I realized there are some feminine things I do naturally!! That realization was a profound moment!! So,yeah I guess I do have trouble keeping them seperate but I joke about when I do!!! Hugs Lana Mae

[Ellie Summer]

I've always had moments of sitting in positions that are normally only done by women. Crossing my legs for example, or sitting on the couch with my feet tucked up underneath me. I own it, no shame whatsoever. The shaved legs make it even more pronounced I'm sure, but it's one of those things that I really don't care about looking "different".

[Ceera]

Oh, the girl is clearly visible in the guy for me these days. With my ears pierced and nails done 24x7, and my body neatly shaved, it's hard not to have other feminine aspects show as well.

[sometimes_miss]

Do other have issues keeping the girl and boy separate?
Of course. If you do something enough times, it will become somewhat automatic, as you've discovered with the leg crossing thing. So you really have to decide whether you are training yourself to behave as a female, and why. Another thing to consider, is do you pass as an average woman. For if you do not, there's no reason to work so hard to adopt feminine mannerisms, as you won't be fooling anyone, you'll just always look like a guy who's trying to act like a woman, and right now, our society isn't keen on people going over the top trying to emulate the opposite physical sex, though it's often considered worse when a guy does it because so many men take offense to even the remote possibility that any guy could 'turn girly', lest anyone think the he, too might be 'that way'.

[Tina_gm]

One of my favorite topics. 1st though, and sorry to be a bubble burster on this, but the leg crossing thing really REALLY gets me every damn time. And by that I mean that it is/was NOT even considered feminine until the last few decades. It is still done by men, typically those who are old enough so that before the gender dark ages it was merely a comfortable way to sit. I have posted pics of Sean Connery playing James Bond crossing his legs. Only recently have we begun to stigmatize the male gender in such a ridiculous manner. If people really think we are making progress in gender acceptance, I submit we are actually going backwards, and in a hurry. Now, in order to be considered "masculine" a man must never dress nice, shave their face clean, or even groom their beards neat. Or grooming period for that matter. No dancing (god forbid) And all of this crap has only happened within the last few decades at best. So when someone on here says "I cross my legs like a girl", there was no such thing until quite recently. But yeah, now you do I guess, and congrats for simply allowing yourself to sit in a comfortable manner....

Having gotten that out- Why would any of us be surprised at fem like mannerisms? We feel something internal, and strong enough so that we buck society to do so. So now magically we are seeing ourselves or finding ourselves having fem like mannerisms once we embrace our femininity. I have had some fem like mannerisms all my life. It was noted to me way back before I was in any way ok with my own femininity. I wouldn't even know I was doing some of them. I think today though, with all of this recent trend of physical hyper masculine crap.... man spreading *ugh* it is more apparent than before. But the fem like mannerisms is likely natural to most all of us.

I see a lot of posts about how to present "female" or feminine or ladylike.... and when I have seen CDers in public, what I usually notice is the exaggerations too many make. I am willing to bet that most would fair better if they simply relaxed and just be their natural selves.

Is it going to spill over, even though may think we have this ironclad separation of male/female, yeah, probably, because at a certain point there is always going to be some blending of ourselves. We can "act" super macho" or act very very feminine, but generally, we are going to have certain fem like tendencies, or characteristics. We probably have become so used to covering them up, that just letting go and being natural doesn't seem right.

[Amy Fakley]

Yeah, I get "girl containment breaches" a whole lot more lately than I used to.

The thing is, these mannerisms have been my default operating mode for my entire life, and I used to expend sooooooooooooooooo much energy being hypervigilant ... Trying to squash even the slightest hint that there might be something soft and feminine about me.

I've been happier since I came to just accept this side of me, and after finding acceptance from my wife ... she has noticed my girly side coming through all the time now. It initially concerned her, but looking at it .... Honestly I think it's just subconscious ... I'm not afraid to be myself anymore, and I'm getting to darn old and tired to keep policing my own behavior so obsessively.

If people gotta problem with it, they can kiss my lily white, padded ... bumper :-)

[Sabrina133]

Amy,

interesting perspective. I very much had the same issue. I am very feminine in my every day action so for me, it wasn't falling into feminine mode but making sure i was acting appropriately masculine. My moments of fail would be when i forgot and reverted to my feminine mannerisms.

Bree.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Andrea:hugs:, After being in this program for 69years, I often catch Mr. Drab acting a little girly...:daydreaming:...