Voice

[Lorileah]

Often people here ask how to speak more like a woman. Last night I watched a video on Netflix called "Do I sound Gay?" about how a gay man wanted to not sound gay but more masculine. It made some good points and gave suggestions on how to change. It seems that gay men (some) are more imprinted on women as they grow up and thus the stereotypic sing song pattern that is associated with gay men occurs. Seems that ifd a TG wanted to sound more feminine, you could do the opposite. It is worth the time to watch if changing your voice is important to your presentation

[Kate Simmons]

Good advice Lori. I noticed that years ago the noted CDer Alison Liang stated that it is also the WAY we tend to say things also contributes to how we sound to onlookers. Such as the thing we emphasize when we speak. :)

[Alice 23]

Thanks for the tip, Lori! I'll have to watch that tonight, as my voice is something I'm constantly working on.

[Teresa]

Lorileah,
What are your own thoughts on changing your voice ?
It doesn't concern me unduly no one in my social group makes any attempt to alter their voice, there are TSs among them one has a fairly deep voice, I guess it's a minor point when so much else is going on with transition, I may ask her about it next time to see how she feels about it.

[sometimes_miss]

Often people here ask how to speak more like a woman.
There was an asian TS on youtube back in 2008 going through transition. She had a couple of dozen videos up showing how she changed her deep male voice into a genuine female sounding one. She referred to it as 'sliding voice' technique. The videos are no longer up, but they may still be on the net if you know where to look. Initially, her files were also hosted by a fellow TS named Lauren Scarlett, but that person's website is gone, too. If you know either of these people, you'll be able to find excellent instructional videos.

[Pat]

Very cool film, thanks for the pointer. I think the biggest message came at the end of the journey when he concluded that what he really needed was to accept himself. It always seems to come down to that -- the rest is frosting. ;)

[Lorileah]

Lorileah,
What are your own thoughts on changing your voice ?


My voice is what it is. Since I am on stage and I sing, I don't intentionally change it. However, it has gone up subconsciously and maybe via HRT and surgery (not significantly). I do notice I can hit higher notes. Personally, I don't care what people think. But it is important to many as a "package". The walk , the talk, the look. In my life I don't expect that in close situations I will be "made". If they didn't make me before we spoke, I doubt my voice will change anything.

That said, in the gay community (and I suspect the drag community and maybe the CD world), there is a cadence. In the video they called it the melody. You all know some of it. Ending the sentence on an up note (as like a question). It makes the speaker less forceful, more submissive. Note that men in general speak from the diaphragm or abdomen, whereas women speak more in the head and nasal areas. Women are more likely to draw a syllable out. Especially the "O"s. Women speak (enunciate) slower and more clear. All generalizations for sure but things that broadcasters have been taught to do for years even if they do speak lower. Thus, in many cases, gay men do the sing song thing (which may be part of the transpeople ae gay thing). In general, women leave things open, thus men get to do "mansplaining" because women don't TELL you how things are; they lead you to figure it out yourself. Something like the phrase "You know that isn't the right thing to do" is a question in the feminine world but a statement in the male. So just changing a few things, speaking slower, ending on an up note, and doing a cadence makes you sound more feminine.


Personally, many times when I encounter a CD who tries to change, it comes out as fake or forced. They try too hard (as they do with walking and dressing and other things) as Jennie said
. I think the biggest message came at the end of the journey when he concluded that what he really needed was to accept himself.

[sometimes_miss]

I listened through the audio files that I ripped from the videos, and found a link to this: http://heartcorps.com/journeys/voice.htm

Hope it helps.

[Marcelle]

snip . . . I think the biggest message came at the end of the journey when he concluded that what he really needed was to accept himself. It always seems to come down to that -- the rest is frosting. ;)

Well said . . . self acceptance is the hardest part regardless of whether you are CD or TS. Once you reach that point then it just doesn't matter because you just don't care. I have no passing privilege whatsoever and even though I consider myself a woman, people will always see an ugly old dude in a dress when they look at me. I won't lie, it was hard at first but once I accepted it I realized people really don't care about little old me and just interact with me as a person. My voice is no different. I tried to alter it with all the YouTube videos, tried speech therapy and while I can keep it within a reasonable range . . . it still screams guy . . . especially on the phone where I am sure people think they are talking to Gandalf the Grey :). So, I just continue speaking in the range I am comfortable with and my speech patterns have shifted much akin to what Lori was talking about. But the kid is not fooling anyone but to be honest the kid just doesn't care.

Cheers

Marcelle

[Krisi]

Sadly, there are far more differences between males and females than just boobs and genitals. All it takes is money to get boobs and vaginas and a few thousand more to get rid of the body and facial hair and adams apple. Changing our voices and the way we speak isn't something we can just throw money at. It's not just the pitch, it's a lifetime of learned habit that has to be broken and relearned.

One thing I've observed over my many years is that for the most part, women speak faster than men and use far more words to tell the same story.

[Tina_gm]

Octave is only one way in which we need to change our voice if that is what we wish to do. In some ways I wonder if it is the easiest way, so far as what we are capable of anyway. We are not going to be able to hit higher octaves than capable, but over time learning how to use "our" higher range with more comfort and less stress sounding. The way in which we talk I think is also very important, Possibly more important than octave. Other posters have made good observations. One thing I noticed about the shorter or less words.... When it comes to most guys when they text message, at least to other guys it is as if they have a word limit for the day and they are close to hitting it. Speaking more creatively with our actual words is something that we can work on.

[Pattie]

I agree women do talk faster than most men and DETAILS,DETAILS,DETAILS. Over the years of being infemme I have learned to change my voice and sound more like a woman, and I can revert back to a man too. As you all know by now I am 24/7 except for 1 day a month, Board meeting day.

[Taylor186]

I watched it recently on youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jz6KlErXshU

[OCCarly]

Changing our voices and the way we speak isn't something we can just throw money at.



Oh, yes it is: http://www.yesonvc.net/ I know someone who flew to Korea and had the voice feminization surgery. It costs about $10,000.00 including travel (if you don't mind flying coach and spending a week in rather spartan accommodations). The results are absolutely stunning.

[Mirya]

They do good work at Yeson Voice Center, but the surgery only changes your pitch. You still need many months of vocal training to achieve a feminine resonance, intonation, and phrasing, among other things.

[TaniaR]

Thank you very much Lorimuch. The pointers are much appreciated....and Taylor too as I don't subscribe to Netflix. Something very interesting to watch this evening.

Tania

[Krisi]

Oh, yes it is: http://www.yesonvc.net/ I know someone who flew to Korea and had the voice feminization surgery. It costs about $10,000.00 including travel (if you don't mind flying coach and spending a week in rather spartan accommodations). The results are absolutely stunning.

As many have posted, a female sounding voice is much more than the pitch or range. Some women speak in a low pitch and some men speak in a high pitch but we can easily tell which is which in almost all cases. A boob is a boob but speaking is far more complicated. Take your $10K surgery and add a few years of serious training and you might get there eventually.

[Meghan4now]

especially on the phone where I am sure people think they are talking to Gandalf the Grey :).

Well, stop telling those other CDS "You shall not PASS!"

'Course, he did say that to a real flamer!

[Lorileah]

Krisi, that's like telling people here to not get breast implants because it's a waste of money. Since it is a legitimate surgery, your opinion is just that...an opinion.