AmyGaleRT
09-25-2016, 11:37 PM
I've now crossed the threshold...my transition is no longer a matter of "if," it's a matter of "when" and "how."
The final epiphany came a little over a week ago, when I attended my youngest brother's wedding in Portland, Oregon...as Amy. No more pretending. No more hiding. I presented as a woman in front of my family members and all my brother's wedding guests...and was accepted as a woman by everyone there. I even had a photo taken with my father, my stepmother, my three brothers, and my new sister-in-law...a photo which, if you'd told me three years ago that it would exist, I would have thought you'd lost your mind! (Photo not uploaded here for policy reasons.)
I appeared at the rehearsal dinner wearing a lavender HolyClothing dress, and at the wedding itself wearing a Jessica London flyaway maxi in navy blue with red and yellow floral print. (I'd previously worn that dress to my friend Millie's wedding in Georgetown.) Fellow guests accepted me as "Amy, Michael's elder sister" without batting an eye. My stepmother referred to me at least once as "our daughter Amy" and told me how proud she was of me. My father obliged when I took a selfie with him. :D And I got to dance at their reception, too! (The iPad they were using for music started playing "Gimme! Gimme! Gimme!" by ABBA...and I've performed to that song. My "Amelia Storm" instincts took over!)
Walking up the street to where I'd parked the car afterwards, I reflected that I wouldn't trade these memories for all the days that might be left to me. And I knew: This is who I am. I cannot deny this any longer.
I am very fortunate in that my fiancee supports me 100%. (She received her share of praise for how she's accepted me, too, to the point where she found it hard to take without bursting into tears!) I also believe I will have the support of my employer and my coworkers (many of whom know already, and one of whom sometimes addresses me as "Miss Amy"). And, of course, my family members...though my mother is struggling with it, and it may be hard for her to come to full acceptance.
I'm now engaged in the process of finding a therapist, so I can really be certain that this is right for me and how I can proceed. Prudence demands that I do so, even if it isn't strictly necessary. I can't go through the Gender Identity Center, because that would be a conflict of interest; fortunately, I have other sources of information, like my insurance company's Web site. A therapist I know in Colorado Springs has also offered to recommend people locally.
I am no longer the person I once was, nor can I ever be again. I am a woman; I believe that now, and the observations of others around me back that up. What this means to me in the future is the next question I must answer.
So here goes...
- Amy
The final epiphany came a little over a week ago, when I attended my youngest brother's wedding in Portland, Oregon...as Amy. No more pretending. No more hiding. I presented as a woman in front of my family members and all my brother's wedding guests...and was accepted as a woman by everyone there. I even had a photo taken with my father, my stepmother, my three brothers, and my new sister-in-law...a photo which, if you'd told me three years ago that it would exist, I would have thought you'd lost your mind! (Photo not uploaded here for policy reasons.)
I appeared at the rehearsal dinner wearing a lavender HolyClothing dress, and at the wedding itself wearing a Jessica London flyaway maxi in navy blue with red and yellow floral print. (I'd previously worn that dress to my friend Millie's wedding in Georgetown.) Fellow guests accepted me as "Amy, Michael's elder sister" without batting an eye. My stepmother referred to me at least once as "our daughter Amy" and told me how proud she was of me. My father obliged when I took a selfie with him. :D And I got to dance at their reception, too! (The iPad they were using for music started playing "Gimme! Gimme! Gimme!" by ABBA...and I've performed to that song. My "Amelia Storm" instincts took over!)
Walking up the street to where I'd parked the car afterwards, I reflected that I wouldn't trade these memories for all the days that might be left to me. And I knew: This is who I am. I cannot deny this any longer.
I am very fortunate in that my fiancee supports me 100%. (She received her share of praise for how she's accepted me, too, to the point where she found it hard to take without bursting into tears!) I also believe I will have the support of my employer and my coworkers (many of whom know already, and one of whom sometimes addresses me as "Miss Amy"). And, of course, my family members...though my mother is struggling with it, and it may be hard for her to come to full acceptance.
I'm now engaged in the process of finding a therapist, so I can really be certain that this is right for me and how I can proceed. Prudence demands that I do so, even if it isn't strictly necessary. I can't go through the Gender Identity Center, because that would be a conflict of interest; fortunately, I have other sources of information, like my insurance company's Web site. A therapist I know in Colorado Springs has also offered to recommend people locally.
I am no longer the person I once was, nor can I ever be again. I am a woman; I believe that now, and the observations of others around me back that up. What this means to me in the future is the next question I must answer.
So here goes...
- Amy