Real woman

[Pattie]

OK here it is. A lot of us on this forum dress and as much as we can act like women, and use women's names,and would like to be a woman or lady whatever we will never be a real woman.
Yes I do live my life as a woman and I enjoy it, but I accept the fact that I am a man dressed as a woman, and live day to day likewise. I will probably get some negative feed back on this, as that is what I expect.

[Kate Simmons]

The important thing is to do what makes you happy. As you say we will never be women. but we have a good time playing at it. Works for me. :battingeyelashes::)

[TrishaLake]

I don't need the classification of passing etc...I need to make myself happy. When I dress I feel good inside and I love it. Perhaps if I was full trans it would make a difference, but I am a crossdresser and I am ok where I am right now.

[BettyMorgan]

You say "I am a man dressed as a woman" as if it's a bad thing. I don't believe anyone here will criticize your beliefs. That's how you feel and it makes you happy so that's great.

Many CDs and transgendered people do feel like women because that's what we believe and there are those that follow your belief. I don't think there's a right or wrong belief in this case. Whether we believe we are women or not, I think the important thing is to break down the binary, gender expression stereotypes.

[AlyssaJ]

Well if you're talking specifically about the crossdressers in the crossdressers board of this forum I can agree with you. However, let's not forget there's a significant number of Transgendered/Transsexual folks here who are women whose bodies were assigned a different sex at birth. They are real women in every sense of the term except perhaps their genitals. Modern medicine has done much to be able to correct that issue too but there is still quite a ways to go. Regardless, I don't agree with your post when taken in the context of this full forum.

I'd challenge you to expand your mind beyond simply what you've experienced. Rather than project your experience upon everyone else, stop to think about how their experience might be different. You accept that you're a man, you have a man's body, you just like to dress up and imitate a woman. Fine. For others, it's not about imitation. It's about being the gender they are rather than the one assigned to them at birth.

[Pattie]

Lisa I did not intend to project my experience upon anybody here I was simply saying that I myself will always be a man dressed as a woman, and presenting myself as a woman 24/7, I have often thought about SRS, but that is as far as I have gone with it.
I have had breast enhancement and that is all. Thanks for your thoughts and feed back.

[Angie G]

I love dressing as a woman.It take all ths BS out of my day and I'm relaxed when I'm all Angie. Being A man doesn't mean a thing it not even there 90% of the time I'm dressed. I don't need to be a real woman I just enjoy who I am.:hugs:
Angie

[CynthiaD]

There are a wide range if feelings expressed on this board, and they're all legitimate. If you feel like a man in a dress, good. More power to you. I don't feel that way. Personally, I'm a woman all the time, regardless of how I'm dressed, and in spite of certain body parts. I'm good at playing the male role, but it's an act and nothing more.

I find the idea of hormone replacement and surgery to be attractive, but I don't find it necessary. I'm already a woman, and I don't need physical changes to make it happen.

We are defined by our outlook and our experiences. Everyone's experiences, male or female, are different. My experiences are different from most women's, but whose aren't? All women are different. My experiences aren't any less real than any woman's. In other words, I'm a real woman. It may be a struggle to get the world at large to believe that, but that's life.

[Kellitgdet]

That my be true, but it's not how I feel. When I get my fem-self on and I look into the mirror I can't believe my eyes. To me I look as beautiful as I feel and it is wonderful.

[Teresa]

Pattie,
I assume from breast enhancements you mean implants ?

It does sound as if you are more TS than a CDer to go for surgery .

Yes I am a little confused as you accept you're a man but live as a woman.

I also would like to dress 24/7 and had started to plan my life on that basis if my separation had gone ahead but how far I would have taken the TS route I can't answer.

[DIANEF]

As long as YOU are happy with your situation that is the main thing. Whatever anyone else thinks is irellevant.

[Pattie]

Teresa Yes I had implants, as I said my whole life has been in,(how do I put this as to not sound like an idiot) Since I was able to walk and play I was always dressed girly, I have a twin sister and we were dressed alike from the beginning, and it always seemed that I was the one to be like my sister. Will one of my friends on here try to help me as I laid out my entire life Jenny and I really don't want to explain it any further. With that said sorry if I hurt someone or made it sound bad.

[docrobbysherry]

We all must compromise if we wish to survive, Pattie. In my case, I'll always be just a man in a dress in real life. :sad:

But, in photos and my mirror I actually pass to myself and others. And, I've become quite satisfied with that result!:daydreaming:

[Lana Mae]

I agree with Kate, be happy! Be happy and learn and grow on your journey-that is life and living! Hugs Lana Mae

[JudyCDTV]

Ditto here too

I love dressing as a woman.It take all ths BS out of my day and I'm relaxed when I'm all Angie. Being A man doesn't mean a thing it not even there 90% of the time I'm dressed. I don't need to be a real woman I just enjoy who I am.:hugs:
Angie

[Tracii G]

You don't need to explain why you live the way you do thats your business.
I'm a mix of both genders so thats the way I live and some here find that odd but nothing I can do about that.

[franlee]

Pattie there isn't anything in your post to argue or disagree with. Seems to me you have a firm grip on reality and that make a good foundation to work from.

[KimberlyJean]

Lisa you said it perfectly, there has been a lot of talk lately that we aren't women and will never know what they experience and for a lot of members that is true. I feel that I am a woman and life just got in the way.

[Kiersten]

I love dressing as a women. It makes feel good and most importantly makes me happy. Those days are few and far between.

[Alice Torn]

i am dittos with kate and Doc. I do know, that i think a lot like a woman at times i am dressed, but know i can never have a baby, no matter what i try to do. T each their own opinion, and reality.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Pattie:hugs:, I will be 74 in two months I was born a male and I will go out thatway,
I totally enjoy dressing as a lady and looking as feminine as I can.

I have been in this program for over 69yrs. now and I can say that I enjoy the best of both worlds
when I get dressed and see that pretty lady smiling in the mirror that just makes my day...:daydreaming:...

[Periwinkle]

I wouldn't really say I'm the picture of femininity when I'm dressed because presenting as a woman isn't really my goal. When I'm dressed I do three big things all for different reasons.

I put on a wig because I'm a huge sucker for hair accessories. I put on light make up because I want my face to look nice in photos. And then I make sure I talk in my higher register so nobody gets weirded out and picks a fight with me. I'm really paranoid about that sort of thing.

But none of these things are done in the pursuit of being a woman. I actually don't underdress or wear breast forms because for me, that's going too far. I like having an outwardly feminine appearance. But changing what's under my clothing, even going so far as to change my mannerisms and behavior? I just can't do it. Unless I'm acting for a play or something, I feel weird being anything other than who I am.

[Pat]

The concept of "Real woman" is kind of toxic. You're saying that sexually you are a male. That's a fact and that can't be changed ever. But we're learning that gender is not the same as sex; they develop at different times and they can be completely or partially out of phase with each other, but like sex it's looking like gender cannot be changed. So what's a real woman? A cisgender female? She certainly is. How about a transsexual? They're pretty certain they are real women and frankly I'm unwilling to challenge them on that. How about run-of-the-mill transgender folks? I'm of the opinion that some of us, at least, are certainly not real women but neither are we real men. So what's the point? The distinction is useful to a person in understanding themselves, but useless for deciding what others are -- if you want to know if someone's a real woman, ask them. And believe their answer. If you want to say you're not a real woman, then I believe you. Cool. You know your answer. But you can't answer for anyone else.

[ShelbyDawn]

Don't get too hung up on trying to put yourself in a box. This is a very broad spectrum from people in full transition to those who go all in or not at all to just like to dress occasionally to those that just wear panties.
It has taken me a long time to realize that I am just me. In my case, I will never pass, so I have stopped trying.
I do however, enjoy and in a way "need" to wear women's clothing. Dressing gives me a sense of calm that I haven't found anywhere else.
I have found a balance that works for me and is as unobtrusive in my life as possible.

Find what works for you and be happy with who you are.

[SherriePall]

What does being a real man feel like? When not dolled up, do we feel like men?

[Judy-Somthing]

I don't know anything about being a real woman but that blue dress your wearing in your avatar looks pretty cool.
It would take up to much space in my stash.

[AlyssaJ]

What does being a real man feel like? When not dolled up, do we feel like men?

This is actually a spectacular question. I think this may actually be how we define the difference between a crossdressing man and a trans* individual. For me, when I'm in male mode, no I do not feel like a man. I always feel like I'm to some degree putting on an act. I always feel like I'm somewhere between a man and a woman with a preference toward the feminine end of the "spectrum".

Pattie, I'd have no problem with your OP if you had been only talking about you. But you used a vague collective "we" which suggests all members of the forum. That's where i have the problem. There are many members here who were born with male genitalia but are true women, and I just don't want to see us discount who they are by making sweeping generalizations.

[Dana44]

Patti, you are nearly a feminine person as that is female trait that is how you are viewed, however we all know we are men and that cding feels good to us and many have gotten in touch with their feminine side. So they say it feels womanly. Now GG's may say tell you don't know how we feel. True and none us on the forum can say they are actually women. But their womanhood is pretty close. But for CD folks when you say I fell like a woman. Perhaps that is close as they may feel quite girly. A sign of womanhood. There should be no argument that we as men who say we fell like a woman do feel a bit like one in the romantic sense but we also know what women are and we could never be like her. Perhaps our own version of what a women is in reference of how he sees it.