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Anne K
11-01-2016, 10:22 PM
I have planning my first night out on Halloween. My plan was to dress, etc and go to dinner at an upscale, outdoor mall in Miami. My wife was very supportive and encouraging. Monday afternoon, I began to get the jitters and decided to cancel. My issue was not centered around dressing/passing. My issue was about shoes! I have a mobility problem, and was afraid I would have to move -very awkwardly- through a restaurant in shoes that I was unsure about. My wife talked me back to Earth and reminded me that Halloween in Miami is a perfect night for my first outing. So, I dressed and tried my shoes on. I moved around and began to feel comfortable. After a bit of thought, I decided to go for it. My wife and I had a lot of fun doing makeup and I must admit that I looked very nice. After that, i was not nervous at all. We had a giggle when the waiter approached our table and in his heavy, Cuban accent asked,"Well, Ladies, what would you like to drink." For the most part, NOBODY paid any attention to us!

I thought it would be helpful if I mentioned some of the preparations I made to insure a safe and fun outing.

1) I wore age and occasion clothing. I did not want to stand out at all.
2) I had painted toe nails and fingernails. Yes, we can wear open toe shoes in November in Miami!
3) The jewelry I wore was tasteful, though I have to admit the "diamond" tennis bracelet and "diamond" ring really added some bling.
4) The mall had patrolled, well lit parking.
5) My wife reminded me to smile and I certainly was smiling.
6) I sat up straight. I ate slowly.
7) I did not try to disguise my voice. I tried not to speak too loud.
8) I acted confidently.
9) I had my first glass of wine in 6 months. In fact I had two!

Our plan is to do this on a regular basis and we will return to the same restaurant. We feel that the staff will become familiar with me and that will make the experience more fun.There were a lot of Latin women there and I think I have to study how they dress. I wonder if i could pull that off?

redtea
11-01-2016, 10:39 PM
Almost doesn't count :daydreaming:

Good thing too, Id be so upset if all the clothes I almost didn't buy went poof because it wasn't a solid burst of confidence that bought them.

Dana44
11-01-2016, 10:46 PM
Actually sounds like nice night out and you have nice wife. Yeah it is good to go to the same restaurant. Yeah you can pull that off on the way they dress.

AllieSF
11-01-2016, 11:00 PM
Congratulations Joyce. The first time can be the hardest, just remember the moment. After a while it really does become so much easier and enjoyable. Though maybe not quite as memorable. Also, congratulations on having such an understanding and helpful wife.

Teresa
11-02-2016, 01:47 AM
Joyce,
I'm not sure what your mobility problem is but shoes can give you problems anyway. You can try them in the shop and you can wear them around the house and they're fine but as soon as you step out into the World they can feel too small and start to pinch or usually start to feel too big and you have to clench your toes to stop them slipping off.

I'm glad your wife talked you into it and you had a good time, now you are looking forward to the next outing .

I agree with most of your points apart from I don't drink because I'm usually driving .

JamieG
11-02-2016, 05:44 AM
Good for you Joyce! Make sure your wife knows how much you appreciate her support.

Karen RHT
11-02-2016, 08:17 AM
Well planned, well executed, and despite understandable butterflies with temporary loss of confidence, ultimately enjoyed. Does it get any better than that???

Big kudos to your supportive wife for her encouragement.

Well done Joyce, keep going and keep enjoying.


Karen

Helen_Highwater
11-02-2016, 01:04 PM
Joyce,

Congratulations on your night out. Sounds like it couldn't have gone better. You owe your wife a huge thank you.

The 1-8 points you listed are an excellent blueprint for anyone taking those first step out btw.

Allycttv
11-02-2016, 01:47 PM
nice that you've got a supportive wife my wife has no idea

Heisthebride
11-02-2016, 01:55 PM
So awesome! I hope this leads to many more fun nights out.

nikiaswell
11-02-2016, 02:47 PM
you have a wonderful wife!

Lana Mae
11-02-2016, 02:50 PM
Congrats!! You have a great wife!! She deserves much attention from you!! You had butterflies but you got them flying in formation and got thru your night and enjoyed it!! Hugs to both Lana Mae