Hard to go back

[Maria 60]

Because it's been like a animal house lately, my wife encouraged me to go for drives to get some time to myself. It started a couple of Thursday's a month and then once a week, and then a few times a week. Last week it was Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday, the part that's funny is I don't do anything, I just drive around.
My wife called me today and told me that the house is mine tonight because everybodys going out. What was so amazing once is now boring, I want to go out, I don't want to be locked in like a prisoner.
I want to go take chances and be seen as a women, even if it's just driving around.
WOW! the saying is true "you can't go back to chicken once you eat steak.
I'm dressed writing this and really feeling confused because I moved on and I didn't even realize it. I love the closet, but i didn't realize I haven't been in it for a while and enjoy being out of it.
Once you take a step forward, it's hard to step back. Ever get that feeling and where did you go from there?

[Shely]

I have been out only once or twice and it was kind of nerve wracking, but fun. I only got out of the car for a few minutes at a strip mall; and jumped back in the car when i saw someone coming my way. I think about it often but haven't found the opportunity to do it for a while. I don't know if i will go out again, but maybe. But having the house to myself still sounds like fun to me.:doh:

[Lana Mae]

Try to step forward. You are driving around. Ok. Park, get out of the car, and walk around. Or go to the park and sit on a bench. One my wife and I did-go to McDonalds eat in the car and feed the birds in the parking lot! There are many options if you think about it! Have fun and enjoy! Hugs Lana Mae

[Tracy Irving]

There was a time when I never thought I would have the courage to try on wedding and other dresses at bridal stores.

I had to step back as I eventually ran out of closet space, stores to visit and money that I allocated to cross dressing.

Right now I am in limbo but I assume the desire will surface again this winter or next spring.

[Krisi]

Your situation may be different from mine but what keeps me from driving around (or driving to someplace and back) is the getting from the house to the car and back without being seen by the neighbors.

Your wife said the house is yours? Does that mean she knows but doesn't want to see you as a woman? She leaves so you can dress?

[Jenny22]

Maria, here are my thoughts, replying to another post:

Annie, its baby steps. I'm an older, life-long closet CDer, but thanks to the girls on this forum, and one in particular who I will meet with tomorrow morning for coffee, I'm now exploring more of the outside world, with baby steps. Mine began with: a Saturday office complex walk in the parking lot, a drive thru meal order, a parking lot walk at a strip center, driving to and from southern Nevada, another drive thru order, a Halloween strip center walk past store doors, all en femme with makeup, wig and jewelry. I will meet with my forum friend tomorrow en femme... a first for me. I know she'll encourage me to take more 'girly steps,' now. Its hard, but can be done. Hugs.

[Tracii G]

I have to wonder why she is letting you do it more often?
What is she doing while you are out?

[Helen_Highwater]

Maria,

I liken it to walking along a passage way that's made of 2 high parallel walls that go on for a considerable distance. Looking ahead all you can see is a tiny bit of the world. Then suddenly the walls start to curve away from each other and with each step your view gets wider and wider and you see more and more of the world. Once seen it can't be forgotten and it's the same with our CD'ing experiences.

Once you've stepped out from the narrow passage there's no turning back. You know what's out there and you want to experience it.

[PeggyNell]

Maria 60, it is hard to go back. I have been out some. I live between Atlanta and Athens Georgia, so I have a lot of places to choose from to go dressed and be around people that don't look twice and compliment me. I also have told my mom, she is very understanding. So, now I really don't have to "sneak around. Yes, I don't go to the mail box dressed....we it was dark😉. I know it is more me not want to get in to a confrontation, than letting people see me. Keep going forward, and be happy!!

[Maria 60]

I have some time so I can answer some questions.
Krisi, she said the house was mine to dress, but she was home, she is OK with my dressing as long as I don't end up looking better then her?Lol
Tracii G I know where your going with that, but I go out because there's always somebody home, if it was just her I would stay home and dress, but my home for some reason became a train station, people coming and going all the time. Plus if she wanted to have an affair she has lots of time during the day, I think she's going to work everyday, but who knows what she does on those hour and a half lunches.

[CarlaWestin]

I remember a long time ago how nervously thrilling it was to borrow one of my mother's bras and put it on. Then later on I had my own bra. Then a wardrobe. Then the excitement of going out dressed like a woman. Now I look at a closet full of styles, costumes, themes and moods. Always pushing the envelope a little more each time. Either going out completely passable or, wearing an extreme outfit knowing most people don't notice. I think we just sometimes want to duplicate the intensity of the first time.

[Krisi]

Thanks for answering my question. I think the key to dressing around your wife is to keep it low key and casual. If you are at home and she is in casual clothes, don't wear heels, a tight mini skirt and lots of makeup.