Okay, now I KNOW I can pass

[Helen 2]

This morning I left home early dressed as below to my own 'girl day out' day and on my way out, stopped at the same Starbucks where I go eeeevry day in drab on my way to work. it's a small Starbucks and the two baristas there know I'm a CD, have seen pictures but never the real me, so I had to stop and have some coffee and....one of the two -the barista at the expresso machine- did not recognize me AT ALL. Kelly at the register did and was speechless, but to Andi, I had to say 'don't u recognize me?' and she said 'no' -until in my more male voice I asked for my usual short doppio latte and.....her face was PRICELESS. I was six feet from her and she thought I was a gurl!

Yay!! :D

[Exris]

Congrats on your esteem raising victory!

Cherish every victory girl! I especially like the dress...

[Lana Mae]

Yeah!! Score at least one!! Congrats, girl!! Onward and upward!! Hugs Lana Mae

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Helen:hugs:, It really sounds like you got your CD card punched this Morning, Congratulations...:daydreaming:...

[Elizabeth G]

Wow - what a feeling that must have been!

[Tracii G]

Flat out awesome Helen !!!.
Its so enjoyable to be around people that know both sides and have fun with it.

[greeneyes]

That is really great! you look awesome! I like the dress too!!

[alwayshave]

Helen that's great.

[Teresa]

Helen,
That was a lovely experience and so good to share with us.

It is a great feeling that you can go out in femme mode and be accepted in that way, I've been told I make a convincing woman. We have an interesting situation coming up with the Xmas party , I intend to drive dressed and check into the hotel, change into my cocktail dress for the party and in the morning dress for breakfast, but for the first time the management will see me in drab mode when I check out , they have only seen me dressed so I'll be doing it in reverse to you. I'll post the outcome after the event to let you all know how it goes .

[michelleddg]

Such fun, and thanks for sharing! It's my sense my own mother wouldn't recognize me dressed. Have some strong evidence to that effect, but also some counter-examples. It's an interesting area. Hugs, Michelle

[Rachael Leigh]

Helen how nice I'm sure it felt good

[ellbee]

Maybe I'm just stupid, but it sounds like one of them simply didn't recognize you until you spoke in your regular voice & ordered your usual.

Not seeing where the passing thing comes in. Am I missing something? :strugglin

[Helen 2]

Laura...the 'passing thing' was that I needed to speak in my normal -more male- voice to be recognized because the barista thought it was a girl ordering coffee -or so she said.
I'll take that as a pass every day...
Hugs
Helen

[Julie Denier]

So cool! You look terrific ;)

[bridget thronton]

Very nice

[Valery L]

What a nice experience!, It contrasts with the general consensus in this site which states "thy shall not pass as a genetic girl, no man can do that nor he will". However, in my opinion, since that woman thought that you were also a female is definitively a proof that you can pass at least partially, congratulations for that ;)

[Connie D50]

Great post you look great

[MissTee]

That's awesome. I bet you felt amazing!

[CONSUELO]

Go Helen!

[Tracy Irving]

Congratulations. Keep up the good work!

[ellbee]

Laura...the 'passing thing' was that I needed to speak in my normal -more male- voice to be recognized because the barista thought it was a girl ordering coffee -or so she said.

I'm glad you added in that last part.

Not recognizing you has nothing to do with passing, IMO, as she still could have simply thought you were a guy or TS or whatever, who she thought she didn't know.


And I'm not saying that what she told you wasn't the honest-to-goodness truth, i.e., she genuinely thought you were a GG.

But personally, I take what people say or even do with a very large grain of salt when it comes to this stuff. I think one has to.


Even getting hit on, for example, by an apparently hetero guy at a hetero club? Wow, total pass! :GD:

Wrong. Still not completely buying it, as there are still tons of possible explanations in which they still don't consider you as a GG... They lost a bet? Took on a dare? Drunk (even if he's not outwardly showing it)? Bisexual? Bi-curious? An "admirer"? He's a non-dressed CD'er, himself? Just looking to find out what you actually are? Figure what the heck, he's horny & "she" still looks pretty hot, regardless, and here's his chance to give it a whirl? Etc., etc. Sure, in a situation like that, one could reasonably assign greater odds that the CD'er did pass -- but even then, how do you know with absolute certainty? You sort of don't, without the knowledge of further objective information / legit facts.


Anyway, obviously I don't know regarding your particular case. Maybe she didn't know what to say? Maybe she was just being nice? Or professional? Etc. I find passing with GG's pretty difficult to do, no matter who one may be or how good they're presenting (the entire package) that day -- especially with an interaction in a daytime setting just mere feet away, with good chances the GG wasn't inebriated or anything.

Again, I have no idea what she genuinely thought. Perhaps she did believe you were a GG, and I'm not trying to dissuade you from thinking otherwise. But honestly? Only she knows what was going on in her head at the time, which you seem to acknowledge.

And please don't think I'm picking on you or anything. But simply using this opportunity to discuss this whole passing thing, in general. :)