Dark nights a blessing

[leannejacobs]

Who else thinks that dark nights are a CDers best friend? Obviously I'm talking UK here, I find that it's far easier to get about in the darker evenings, I think I dress quite well but my height if anything is what draws attention, in the darker nights however I find that my confidence grows and I'll venture that little bit further, I suspect I'm not alone in my liking.

[TrishaTX]

I totally agree, sometimes it is hard going out in the summer. A bit easier coving for some flaws in the dark...

[DIANEF]

Just been out for a quick drive myself, love this time of year.

[RADER]

I do not go out; However, because it gets dark by 4:30 PM,
I can go out to the mail box wearing a long skirt and top.
A ankle length jean type skirt can appear to look like jeans
from a distance and with the help of darkness.
I do admit I get excited do this little jaunt.
Rader

[TinaMc]

Winter is a CDer's best friend! No make up vs sweat disasters, can actually cover up the wiry muscly legs sensibly, plus the mentioned reduced visibility. As long as it's dry it's all good.
Summer is pretty awful to be fair.

[Miss Daisy]

Researchers have found that dimming the lights can help people make more rational decisions and settle negotiations more easily....

[Maria 60]

If I do go for a drive it would only be at night, my wife always tells me to be careful because it seems like the animals go out at night.

[Michelle Girl]

Hi Leanne,

I totally agree with you. And in the next 11 or 12 weeks, either side of the winter solstice, it gets dark so early we can go out in the rush hour. My first ever time out in the street en femme solo was around this time last year, in Central London. Normally darkness means cold, empty streets and the risk of drawing unwanted attention to yourself.

I recall going out into the safety of streets heaving with people emerging from shops and offices and rushing to the train station. All on their phones or chatting to friends. The paradox of being safer in a massive crowd.

And of course, I loved going out swaddled in winter clothes, all scarves and longish skirts, like a businesswoman, heels clacking away on the pavement and no one taking any notice whatsoever.

I adore the summer. It's far too short in the UK. But winter is certainly our best friend.


Michelle

[AllieSF]

I agree about dark being a newbie's friend at the beginning. I am always amazed at how much time we sometimes take to get our makeup perfect and to pick the right shade of dark nail polish. Then when you see someone in a nice darker, definitely not dark, ambiance, like a good restaurant or bar, the dark nail polish looks black and you cannot even tell what color is the eye shadow.

Speaking only about a newbie going out for the first few times, I recommend doing it at night. The dark hides so many flaws from make up, to outfit details and so on. Later when one has more experience, hitting the mall with a lot of people helps one better fit into the crowd if one dresses correctly for that moment and to blend in. Bright light can reveal more details, including that the dark nail polish is blue not black, to the general public.

[Leslie Langford]

It depends on what you mean by "nights". Evenings, yes - maybe. Nights - especially late at night...not so much.

GG's rarely venture out alone late at night...if they do, say, when bar-hopping, they are usually with a BFF or a posse of friends. Most fear the night - and for good reason - because that's when the creeps and perverts come out to play looking for an unsuspecting victim. Those that do take that risk are usually streetwalkers, and that will guarantee you unwanted attention, be it from an individual cruising around to pick up someone for a "date", or else the local constabulary while they are out patrolling your neighbourhood and wondering why you are out there all alone at that time of night.

And don't think that your height (and possibly overall build) will necessarily make you immune to being approached by someone with less-than-honourable intentions. On one hand, it may make you a less attractive victim to a predator, but on the other hand, it can also make you stand out like a beacon and put you on their radar screen. What happens next in the mind of said potential predator then becomes a 50:50 proposition.

Really, the best approach usually is to "hide in plain sight"...in other words, be out and about during regular daylight or evening hours, and in areas (busy streets, malls, shopping areas, business sections etc.) where GG's typically congregate. If you are even reasonably "passable" or otherwise blend in, you will just disappear among the crowds as most people are too preoccupied with their own lives to give you much mind. And as for your height - unless you are 6' 8" tall (with or without heels ;) ) or over - you will not stand out the way a unicorn might if that is your concern. There are plenty of tall women and girls around who wear their height proudly, and there exists a vast array of websites, blogs, and Facebook groups etc. (just as there are for crossdressers ;)) where such women socialize, provide mutual support and affirmation, and where they generally revel in their height and see it is a gift that makes them special. Sound familiar?

In short, just learn to love your height, own it, wear it proudly, and don't let it hold you back from enjoying your feminine side to the fullest.

[DIANEF]

It depends on what you mean by "nights". Evenings, yes - maybe. Nights - especially late at night...not so much.

For me evening would be 4.30ish to 9.00ish at this time of year, any later would be unwise where I live.

[Sometimes Chelsea]

I am loving the evenings here. Just the other night I went for a nice walk around the lake in leggings and a padded bra. Granted the bra was under a bulky hoodie, but I wouldn't have dared do that without the cover of night.

[leannejacobs]

Leslie I did mean early to mid evening and I'm not suggesting people put themselves at risk by wandering in secluded darkened areas, what I'm suggesting is that the cover of darkness may help you get to your destination with a little less fuss, I frequently visit populated areas and drive most places while dressed, I am 6' 5" bare foot so I do tower above most, that said I've never had any negativity while out and about.

[ellbee]

Recently I've been watching some "crossdressing in public" videos. A few of them are basically the CD'er (who obviously looks & moves like a guy in a dress & heels) slinking around at night on a deserted city street.

Considering there are absolutely no cars going by, no people walking by, and window lights are off, I'm guessing it was pretty darn late when filming.


Looks pretty darn creepy & sketchy, too, IMO... And this is coming from someone who dresses, at that.


I understand that's not what the OP is talking about. But just throwing all that out there. :)

[leannejacobs]

Yes I've seen those Laura, the deserted supermarket car parks, visits to the card bank machines etc. Pretty dodgy indeed, in fairness, these people most likely have the car very close by with the door open for a quick get away, especially considering some of the crazy outfits.

[Jenniferathome]

Leanne, darkness certainly allows one to hide butis that what you really want when you go out? To hide? I completely understand why a cross dresser would find solace in the dark, but why not just stay at home? For me, being out means interacting with the normals. No amount of darkness will help me there.

[dolovewell]

This thread is confusing... I go out at all times of the day. Even if I go out at night, when I go inside a store or some kind of building, the lights will be on anyway. So what gives?

[leannejacobs]

Jennifer, some of us in fact I'm sure most of us CDers don't have the luxury or indeed the confidence to mingle in close quarters with "normals" as you put it, I can look, move and dress the part and love to get out and about, strutting my stuff for my own enjoyment, I don't particularly feel the need to interact with others although I have on occasion, I'm too tall in my opinion to pass /blend and go un-noticed, plus the confidence takes a hit for that reason.
Those of you who are out of the closet and have perfected your look and confidence are not understanding my post purely because you have no need or desire to be stealthy, the majority of CDers are relatively closeted and have no wish to be noticed which may have an end result of being outed, all I'm saying is that the darker evenings reduce the risks of being spotted by someone who may recognise you.

[valerie anne]

Parading round my fairly safe neighbourhood in bra, sheer top, wig, full makeup and hose is fine, it's the clip-clop of my heels which attracts attention.

It's nice to feel a bit like a *****, but I am on the tantalising edge of safety and I really can't run in these heels.

I do sometimes fantasise about being taken, but I don't suppose it would be very pleasant!

[ellbee]

This thread is confusing... I go out at all times of the day. Even if I go out at night, when I go inside a store or some kind of building, the lights will be on anyway. So what gives?

Because not everyone is at that stage.

Many find some sort of "transition" when going from the confines of their 4 walls, to out in public, to be helpful & even necessary.

Not everyone dives head-first into the deep-end, but instead slowly wades in from the shallow.


Nothing wrong with that. That's how I got started, myself, way back when.

And the lack of sunlight provides a better cover, is all. Whether it's walking around the block, or taking a drive, or going to the ATM, or a fast-food drive-thru, or whatever. Just easier that way. Yes, there may be some lights sometimes, but there's also that much more overall darkness.

Plus many CD'ers seem to wear an evening look when it comes to make-up, perhaps understandably so. And one could argue that it's easier to "get away" with that, well, in the evening, as opposed to the day-time.


Anyway, obviously getting darker now, earlier, in the northern hemisphere. Which means going out at like 6:00 pm instead of waiting til 10:00 pm is a lot more doable.

[dolovewell]

That makes more sense

I know back in my early, early days, when I just wore women's underwear(bras with no forms and panties) under my male clothes, I for the most part would just do it at home. But every now and then I would venture out. In the summer time in Texas, I had no choice but to wear them under just one or two layers of t-shirts. I remember it took a lot of courage to just walk inside a place like Target for example, even though the chances were low no one would know I was wearing a bra. I was still worried someone would see the outline of my bra straps or something. I remember one time I had enough guts to do it at the mall, and I was just wearing a plain forest green t-shirt over my Victoria's Secret Bra(no forms). I was walking and I clearly heard this lady behind me ask her friend "Why does that guy have on a bra". So somehow, she was able to notice the outline of my bra.

So I do remember having to work up the courage to do that.

[AllieSF]

My recommendations are based on the newbie and by dark, I do not mean in the worst part of town at 3 am. I mean if one is going out to a club or restaurant, then at the beginning dark is your friend and is not dangerous. It can be, but just pick a safe place! When you have experience, hell, go out whenever you want. It really is so much fun.