questions about crossdressers

[cakeaholic]

do most crossdressers consider them selves straight?

do most crossdressers prefer men, women, or other crossdressers (I mean sexually)?


whats the biggest difference between tranvestites and crossdressers?


those were just a couple questions I had, would appreciate it if some would share there answers

[Kimberley]

You will find some varying opinions but here is my take. Bear in mind this is a continuum that really has more than one slot for any of us.

Transvestite. Gets sexual arousal from cross dressing

Cross dresser. Is primarily in their biological gender but gets some psychological satisfaction from cross dressing

Transgendered. Has strong elements of their opposite biological gender in their personality.

Transsexual. Is truly gendered opposite to their biology.

Okay, now consider that most of us have elements of at least 2 of these "categories". Most of us would emphatically state that categorization is fundamentally wrong because we are people, just as diverse as the rest of the billions on this little blue orb in space. Our only commonality is that we cross dress.

Sexually we are pretty much in the same proportions as the general population meaning most of us are hetero, a small proportion bi, and an even smaller proportion gay. There was a thread about this last week.

The biggest mistake people make is to equate gender with sexuality which in truth have no relationship with one another.

Clear as mud? Thought so. Lots for you to read and learn here.

Kimberley

[nancy58]

Hi,

There isn't any difference between a crossdresser and a transvestite. The latter is the Latin-based word for the former. "Trans" means "across", and "vestire" (I think that's it) means "to dress". There's a third term, transsexual, that is often confused with transvestite. A transsexual is a person who feels like and wants to become someone of the opposite sex. That's not most of us here.

Most of the transvestites here are sexually attracted to women. There are a few who are gay, and a few, I am sure, who are bisexual. We have a few genetic women here, too, who understand us or are trying to understand us. Since I'm still trying to understand the genetic woman who has been my wife for 13 years, I think turnabout is fair play. ;-)

The term "straight" could be interpreted in a variety of ways. If putting on a dress and other feminine things for pleasure, but being sexually attracted to women is considered straight, then most of us are straight. But you'll have to admit it's a little weird.

Anyway, come join us. We'll try to help you, and you can keep your dignity and anonymnity intact. Or, if you're trying to understand a transvestite, we'll do our best to help with that, too.

Nancy

[danielle_from_cal]

I think the numbers are the same for crossdressers and anyone else. I like men sometimes, but mainly for the feminine feeling. I would way rather look at women, and would rather look like one.

[Falcor]

A good evening to everyone,I don't think there's any difference between c.ders and transies,I feel some of us prefer the term c.d.,thinking that more acceptable,complete piffle of course.
I suspect bisexuality is slightly higher in our community than in general[no evidence,whatsoever]

a wonderful life oo all.
falxx

[Felicia]

I have tried it both ways. I still prefer to be with a woman. To be admired while dressed by a woman is the greatest feeling as to being desired by a man. (HUG) Felicia

[Cathy Anderson]

> do most crossdressers consider themselves straight?

Yes.

> do most crossdressers prefer men, women, or other crossdressers (I mean sexually)?

(a) women, (b) other crossdressers, and (c) men--in that order.

> whats the biggest difference between tranvestites and crossdressers?

Strictly speaking, the words are synonyms, with "transvestite" being Latin for "crossdresser." So all we're talking about are informal differences of usage, nuance and connotation, which are subjective. That said, I believe that:

1. "transvestite" is more commonly applied to a man who crossdresses in public, goes to bars, etc. A man who only dresses at home or in the closet is more likely to be called a crossdresser, and not a transvestite.

2. Related to the above, I believe there is a slightly stronger connotation of homosexual activity for "transvestite" than for "crossdresser."

3. In general, "transvestite" seems a more pejorative term. If one says, "that person crossdressers" it might just imply an eccentric habit. But if you say "that person is a transvestite" it's like making a defining statement of who and what they are.

So perhaps that's an advantage of "crossdresser" over "transvestite." You can make CD a verb (to crossdress) and gerund (crossdressing), which simply describe behavior and do not make a sweeping categorization of the person. You can't do that with "transvestite."

Cathy

[Cathy Anderson]

I have tried it both ways. I still prefer to be with a woman. To be admired while dressed by a woman is the greatest feeling as to being desired by a man. (HUG) Felicia
I think many CDs would agree with this.

It could be that the attraction is mainly to the *feelings* of being a woman who is held/loved/etc. by a man. And that is different from a more general attraction to another man.

In other words, I suggest that many CDs would like the physical and emotional sensations of sexual activity (broadly defined) with a man, but aren't especially attracted to other men's personalities.

That might be a fundamental difference between "heterosexual CDs" and
"homosexual CDs" (and also gay men), in that the latter also find men's personalities attractive in a more general or romantic sense.

Cathy

[Butterfly Bill]

Most crossdressers are heterosexual. It sort of like: you like girls so much you want to be one.

But there are gay crossdressers, and most of the ones who perform on stage professionally as female impersonators are gay.

"Transvestite" to me is a psychologist's term, used to talk about us like we have a mental illness, so I don't use it.

[susandrea]

And don't forget drag queens-- almost always gay.

Chicks with....

Men in skirts....

A minefield!

[Jennaie]

do most crossdressers consider them selves straight?

do most crossdressers prefer men, women, or other crossdressers (I mean sexually)?


whats the biggest difference between tranvestites and crossdressers?


those were just a couple questions I had, would appreciate it if some would share there answers

This girl goes to great lengths to answer all the faq's that most people ask:

http://www.reneereyes.com/

[Rikkicn]

I've heard for years that most cross dressers are straight and I'm curiuos how we really know that. Can anyone point me to that research. I would really like to read it for myself.
I have a Yahoo Group and I've run polls that indicated we are 65% bi-sexual. I'm sure my group is skewed but those number, based on 400 reply, are sure interesting.
Rikki

[Helen MC]

They sometimes say, get 3 of us in a room and you will get 8 answers to such questions.

To my way of thinking and from what I have read and heard about TVs/CDs over the last 35 or more years the answers I would give are as follows.

TVs are men who dress to emulate a woman as much as is possible and enjoy going out dressed as such and passing as a woman, and may do so either for sexual or behavioral (non sexual) reasons.

CDs are men who are content to dress partly e.g. women's underwear only under male clothing or fully dressed en-femme but indoors alone or with sympathetic company . Being able to pass as female is not as important as it is for a TV. CDing is more often fetishistic and sexual arousal based, it is for me.

Most CDs and TVs I have met are heterosexual but often prefer the submissive role in sex with a woman as I do.

I stress these are my own opinions and observations over the years and not any "official" terminology.

[Dana]

do most crossdressers consider them selves straight?

do most crossdressers prefer men, women, or other crossdressers (I mean sexually)?


whats the biggest difference between tranvestites and crossdressers?


those were just a couple questions I had, would appreciate it if some would share there answers


What's a crossdresser? A tranvestite? A transgendered? They're people! They're people wanting to be wanted, needed, cared for, nurtured, loved, appreciated by someone else. Accepted for who and what they are! As they are! Just that plain~! Just that simple!

[zoetv]

well i have been a transvestite for 35 yrs now , i am definately bi-sexual , and have known this for years, and i am happy with my lot , but not all of us girls that go en-femme are as such a lot are straight as you asked , but ech too thier own i say
lol zoe xx

[Miriannah]

"Transvestite" to me is a psychologist's term, used to talk about us like we have a mental illness, so I don't use it.

I agree, totally. I've had the term 'transvestite' used with far too many negative connotations for me to ever like hearing it. Then again, I don't like labels in general, as they only serve to set "people who do this" apart from "people who do that."

Rather than label myself, I'd rather just say I'm your basic person who likes womens' clothing, is curious about same-sex encounters, and acts a bit girlier than most guys.

[Ashley Helen]

I consider myself straight

I not only prefer women I cannot even imagine enjoying anything else

My understanding is that transvestites get a sexual thrill out of dressing, I just do it because I enjoy the feeling of feminine clothes and think that women have so much better a choice of clothes, materials and shoes than men.

Love

Helen xx

[Yes I am]

That people use the term "transvestite" as a pejorative is exactly the reason why it is my term of choice. I wish to reclaim it and make it something I use instead of having people put it on me. I refuse to let anyone, especially another man in a dress, take it away from me. I love that it does sound a little bit sinister, maybe even clinical. The term "crossdresser" is a bit too literal and boring. I enjoy crossdressing, crossdressing is what I do so, duh, I'm a crossdresser. I guess I'm also a zipperer for zipping myself up, and a buckler too for buckling my belt, you could accurately describe me as a buttoner as I button my buttons too... but this is all just my opinion, for what it's worth.

[gennee]

Most crossdresser are straight. From what I have read, the drag queens are gay for the most part, though not all. To me, there's no difference between crossdresser and transvestite. Though transvestite has negative connotations, I consider myself a transvestite.

Gennee

[Jolene]

You will find some varying opinions but here is my take. Bear in mind this is a continuum that really has more than one slot for any of us.

Transvestite. Gets sexual arousal from cross dressing

Cross dresser. Is primarily in their biological gender but gets some psychological satisfaction from cross dressing

Transgendered. Has strong elements of their opposite biological gender in their personality.

Transsexual. Is truly gendered opposite to their biology.

Okay, now consider that most of us have elements of at least 2 of these "categories". Most of us would emphatically state that categorization is fundamentally wrong because we are people, just as diverse as the rest of the billions on this little blue orb in space. Our only commonality is that we cross dress.

Sexually we are pretty much in the same proportions as the general population meaning most of us are hetero, a small proportion bi, and an even smaller proportion gay. There was a thread about this last week.

The biggest mistake people make is to equate gender with sexuality which in truth have no relationship with one another.

Clear as mud? Thought so. Lots for you to read and learn here.

Kimberley


I agree Kim . This says it well for most of us. Myself ....... I love women .... would love to be with one but also I would love to be one . Makes no sense I know ..... Jolene

[Snookums]

I prefer women,I have never had any desires to be with men,for the life of me I don't understand what one man sees in the hairy butt of another man,or men doing oral on another man,disgusting.

[Stephenie B]

Do we need labels? If so where do I fit in?
I'm a male whose female tendencys are taking over, I want to dress as a woman, act as such and still have sex with a woman. Bras garters, stockings, mini skirts, silk blouses, high heels are the things that I look forward to everyday. So what am I?
Huggs to all

[Susan Johnson]

When I first came out to my wife the children were small and I would crossdress almost every evening after they had gone to bed. At that time it used to be very sexually arousing, now 25 yrs later I still do it and enjoy the feel and the appearance of the clothes but in themselves they are not arousing in the same manner mind you this may be due to the advance in years. When with my wife, dressed or otherwise all is as it was!

[Jennaie]

As you can see, there are many views on what tv vs a cd are and many sexual orientations within the transgendered community. The answers to your questions are basically impossible because no single answer represents the whole.

do most crossdressers consider them selves straight? I believe by percentages yes.

do most crossdressers prefer men, women, or other crossdressers (I mean sexually)? Yes


whats the biggest difference between tranvestites and crossdressers? Actually, the biggest difference is the spelling.