Sales Assistants know what you are up to

[caitlyn louisa]

Yesterday I went to Kohls (in drab) and picked out a long black dress, lingerie and 3" pointy black pumps. At the checkout, the SA gave me a cheeky smile and said "someone is going to be very glamorous in this outfit". I couldn't help turning bright red, but after I got in my car I realized that I loved that moment. Does anyone else enjoy being 'caught' ?

[DIANEF]

Yep, SAs know. I used to buy things 'for my wife' until recently, and I was asked many times if what I was buying was for me. I wouldn't say I enjoyed being asked, but it didn't bother me as much as I thought it would. Just noticed it's your first post, good one!!

[IleneD]

I'm so bad.
It's getting so that I live for those moments. Don't know why.

[Julie MA]

I make a point, depending on the situation, of telling them it's for myself. Most are happy to help. Julie

[Beverley Sims]

My reply to any searching quote like you experienced is...."I certainly hope so" :-)

[Jodi]

Of course they know, that is, unless it is their first day or they have their head in the sand. I worked retail for New York & Co. You can make up any story you want, but your body language tells the truth.

Just be up front and honest. I've shopped openly as a male for 15 years. I can count 2 times that an SA was uneasy and that was about 15 years ago. A good SA will jump right in to help you.

Several years ago when an SA was helping me, she said that she enjoyed it because it was like dressing Barbie. I stated to her--"in this case it's like dressing Ken". we both got a laugh out of it.

jodi

[ellbee]

More like Kendra. :heehee:

[ronda]

I had an SA ask if the panties I was buying were for me I look at her and say you don't think they would look good on me she stopped cold look at me and cracked up said she had never gotten that reply before

[Teresa]

Caitlyn,
SAs, don't mind having some fun, when they do the job day in day out something different or a pleasant interaction breaks the monotony of so many non interactive customers. I ran my own business for thirty years, being pleasant and having some fun does bring it's rewards. I guess it explains why I'm not too phased when shopping for my CDing needs.

The thing to do now is get dressed and made up take some pictures wearing the items and go show her them, she'll love it ! It will also help you become more comfortable with your dressing.

[Karen RHT]

I enjoy dialogue with SA's, but it's been my experience that when we are "en drab" they only know what we volunteer or allow them to know. I've bought women's wear (everything from stockings and lingerie, to outdoor wear) since I was a teenager. Bought them both for myself, and for various women in my life. The vast majority of times the SA "assumed" I was purchasing for a woman, whether I was or not. At times the SA would joke or say something to tease or suggest they thought I was buying or looking for myself. Occasionally the SA would ask flat out if I was purchasing for myself or someone else.

Granted...we can give ourselves away in various ways, but confidence goes a long way.

I could be wrong, but I suspect there's a fair number of men who don't crossdress, but do buy clothes for women in their lives. Somehow I doubt they are as concerned about doing that as much as some of us are.


Karen

[Bridgette T]

Last night I was in a Hallmark store and I was buying a Barbie makeup bag for my wife's Christmas stocking. The lady at the counter said "Oh, is this for you?" I replied "Well, I have to keep my makeup somewhere!" She had a good chuckle. Sometimes I think they are just trying to be funny, so why not give it back?

[suzanne]

From my first time shopping for myself, I made no secret that it was for me. That didn't necessarily mean I told them outright, but if asked, I told the truth. Every SA I met never skipped a beat, they continued with their help and advice as though they see people like me every day.

They know it's for yourself, whether you tell them or not. And they really don't mind. It's just not as big a deal as you think it is. What gets their spidey-sense working is when you start acting like you're doing something wrong. If you're nervous, or evasive or avoiding them, are you looking like a shoplifter, or some creepy pervert or worse? If you own it and speak frankly with your SA, you are a CUSTOMER, and worth all of her respect and expertise, just like any woman shopping there. THAT'S when the real fun begins.

[valerie anne]

I love to flirt with sales assistants!

Basically they are women who love fashion, gossip, cosmetics, lingerie etc. They are normally very understanding and kind. I like to approach them with direct questions, like "these lovely stockings have lace tops, can I wear them with a garter belt?"

I have had a lot of detailed conversations about bra straps, chicken fillets, wearing heels etc., and they love it as much as I do!

[Lucy23]

I used the girlfriend excuse several times until I realized it made the whole thing a whole lot worse for me. I felt nervous not only because I was afraid of being read, but also because I was afraid that SAs might see through the lie and make fun of me.

I stopped "relying" on this tactic after an SA said that "she" could return it in 30 days if the size wasn't right without any previous hint as to who I was buying the item for. My experience is that almost everytime I'm shopping SAs either are quiet or just ask whether I would like to buy anything else for "her".

There were only two occasions that an SA could have been suspecting of anything. On one occasion I was buying heels in a size rather big for a woman's foot and when I was about to pay the SA looked me in the eyes and smiled curiously; on the other I couldn't decide what to buy so I was walking around the store aimlessly, when and a young woman that was promoting make-up services in the store approached me and asked whether I was buying for a girlfriend or..., leaving enough space to fill in as if giving me an opportunity to just say the dreaded sentence. Not surprisingly I chickened out...

Here's me hoping that next time the opportunity presents itself I will muster enough courage to own it like many of you.

[immindy]

Occasionally, I do buy things while in male mode ( I prefer to shop for things as Mindy ). If the sales associates is not busy and is kinda chatty I take out a picture of me as Mindy and show them. It is all fun and really not an issue . Maybe it also can be a fun moment for there otherwise boring day .

[Tracii G]

I have fun with them when they do that because if they start the conversation its game on I will milk it for all its worth.
Sometimes you will get a "well the outfit is cute so please come back in wearing it so we can all see it" is one response I have gotten.
I did come back to that SA to show her and I made a very nice friend that day.
She calls or emails me at least once a month just to chat.
You get out what you put into it as far as having fun with it.

[Barbara Jo]

............ At the checkout, the SA gave me a cheeky smile and said "someone is going to be very glamorous in this outfit"........

I think the SA was just being a good salesperson . It's basically good salesmanship to say that whoever a product is for, they are confident that they will like it, etc.
You always want the customer to feel good about their purchase.

IMO, saying that ""someone is going to be very glamorous in this outfit." and , the cheeky smile for the 3 inch pumps is just part of that and nothing more. :)

[Kandi Robbins]

You're not getting caught, you are being treated as you deserve. Revel in it! Enjoy it! Own it! The other day I picked up a few items at a thrift store, 2 dresses and 2 blouses. The cashier commented on how nice one of the blouses was (I was dressed in my truck driver clothes, unshaven for days). I told her I had the perfect skirt for it and couldn't pass up one of the dresses and we had a lovely conversation while she cashed me out. I left smiling ear to ear. I've done this hundreds of times and every time I have an experience like this, I makes me so happy to be who I am. It never gets old.

[Stephj]

Yes I tell the SA I am buying this bra or pair of panties for me sometimes the SA seems shocked but has always been very helpful

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Caitlyn:hugs:, Welcome to our forum, When you are here you are home.

I have had SA's say something like This will look great on you, And with out missing a beat
I just say I sure hope so or I will be returning it in the morning.

Twice in the last couple weeks I was buying tops and I was asked if I wanted a gift receipt I said
I don't need one they are for me, And the other day I was buying a necklace and earrings
and the same question and I gave the same answer ...:daydreaming:...

[KimberlyJean]

I am a chicken, I have gotten to where I only shop while dressed. It is a lot less awkward and of course it's for me!

[Princess Chantal]

I guess I am once again an odd case. I haven't ever been asked if the merchandise is for me. At the beginning of my crossdressing, I had the "it's for my wife/girlfriend" reason that I would have used as I wasn't comfortable with being a cd during that time. Thankfully, they never questioned. My partner and I went into a store a couple years ago and had the sales associate mention that the store only carries women clothing. My reply was "yes, we didn't fall of the turnip truck. We are crossdressers who've been interested in checking out what you got". In which brought a big welcoming smile from her and she seemed to enjoy picking out dresses for us to try on. Funny thing was that she had socialized with me a few times at kink community coffee meets as Chantal prior and didn't recognize or realize it was actually me until the coffee meet after our store wandering.

[Cheryl T]

I can't say that I "enjoy" it, but I no longer mind if a sales person knows.

[Ressie]

No, they don't always know. Even if they say "is this for you?" they don't really know. They are either being funny or curious. But yes, I always admit it when they ask.

Maybe for fun I'll lie next time I get that question and nervously say, "absolutely not, it's for my mother in law rest her soul". haha

[CynthiaD]

I always assume that the salespeople know the clothes are for me. I often get complements on my selections, but I assume that's just normal politeness.

[Leohose]

The SA today was Sooo helpful - she had on nice tights and a matching black dress she held my hand and led me over to some nice pantyhose she said these are very nice and feel good a little pricy but I think you will like them she smiled and gave my ha d a slight squeeze - I thanked her and said she looked nice and asked her what brand of tights she had on she smiled and brought me over to her brand and pointed out a pair in my size - it was soo nice told her I'd see her again and purchased my tights and Pantyhose - just got home and slipped into the pantyhose - such a nice experience so yes she knew I had bought from her before

[sarah87]

If you are friendly, nice and just own it most SA's are sweet and very helpful. I have had many wonderful encourage terse at victoria secret that have turned into two friendships. The other night at payless near closing time two female sa's kept feeding me shoes and had fun with me. This is all as a guy wearing women's clothes

[TrishaTX]

Happens about half the time to me...they must know from my size that it is probably for me. I think most don't care and the other part don't want to know.

[Becky Blue]

I quite often buy things for my wife, in a funny reverse world I was asked by one SA if it was for me... I said "No not unless my wife doesn't like it". I have also gotten 'that' look on a couple of occasions. When I shop for me, i don't say they are for anyone and quite enjoy seeing the SA's reactions as they figure it out. I have yet to have any negativity from anyone.

[Davinnia]

I don't see what all the fuss is about. I worked in a mens store & women bought things all the time, no questions asked. I bought my foundation today without a second glance from the SA, same with panties. Just act confident.

[Tracy Irving]

I was looking for leggings at Kohl's yesterday hoping to take advantage of an additional 30% off. I found a pair I liked but the leg cut was "straight". I recruited the help of no less than three SA's in our quest for the right pair. We searched through the athletic section, Vera Wang near lingerie and the juniors area, finding nothing. They all assumed I was buying for a SO in my life. The SA's were not young women and it was a week before Christmas. So, there is the possibility that none of them knew what I was up to. I hope not...

[lingerieLiz]

Special times like Christmas and Valentine Day, is when most men buy their SOs gifts. I've done a lot of shopping over the last 50 years. Even back in the old days SAs knew. I worked for a store that carried upscale women's clothes. It didn't take long for a few of the SAs to figure out I was buying for myself. When something came up in my size that they thought I would look good in they would come by and say, I have something your sister would look good in. I also got coaching of what I should wear under and with it. We didn't sell lingerie, but a couple SAs shopped where I did. They asked, don't you like shopping there?

Now days I shop in guy mode. I may have on all women's clothes (don't wear dresses anymore). What is amazing is I've gone to buy something and said it was for me and the SA disregard it. With a bra on and projection I had an SA who kept telling me that "my wife" wouldn't want that style bra. Had a couple SAs ask if the two bras I was buying were for me? I said yes. One of them held the bras up and said, they will match your eyes. I guess she didn't notice my boobs or bra lines which were obvious.

Comments I've received: I don't think we have anything on sale in your size today. How did your slips fit? Everyone should enjoy beautiful lingerie. I've only had a few negative things said in all this time.

[Echo Logical]

When I first started dressing, I would say that the clothes were for a girlfriend. Then one day I was shopping at Payless Shoe sources for some Ankle boots, and the SA quite rudely said, "I hope these aren't for you". I was angry enough at her comment, that I replied, of course they are, then immediately after I purchased them, I put them on, asked for the corporate number, and called them as I strutted out to my car in my brand new Ankle Boots.

I have never again had a situation like that, and have always been upfront about who I am buying for. I find that most SA's love to help me find things that look great.

A couple of years ago, I was the SA, at an adult toy store with lots of lingerie, and I often helped other gurls find what they were looking for. Some were shy, but I would often break the ice by saying that "if I were shopping for me, then this is what I would get" I got a lot of repeat customers by doing that.

[Shayna]

Less worried about the SA knowing its for me than running into someone I know. In the past I've had SAs who were very helpful.

[Alice_2014_B]

Once bought some red lipstick from the BX on base.
I was in uniform and wearing my wedding ring.

Young lady cashier said, "this will look great on you."
She did say it sarcastically, I took no offense.
I replied, "Thank you", equally sarcastic.

Looking back, I should have replied that it will match my red dress I just bought from the thrift store on base.

:)

[Eva Bella]

I do most of my shopping online, but I really enjoy buying makeup and certain clothing in stores. Pretty much always in guy mode.

The makeup.. who knows what they think. I'm pretty knowledgable and like to talk shop with the SA's. Many of the ask if I'm a photographer or somehow working with models. I'm not usually volunteering any information unless they specifically ask. I have told a few of them that the makeup is for me, but I don't go into details. Who knows, maybe they think I'm in a throwback 1980s New Wave band.

For clothing.. I usually only shop at BCBG Max Azaria. The clothing fits me well and has a lot of stretch. My first time there, I picked out some dresses and asked to try them on. The girl gave me a strange glance and I calmly said "I'm genderfluid and I'm generally wearing BCBG stuff two or three times a week. I'm looking for more of it." And that was it... everything was cool! Most of them know me now, and I'm really popular when I come in. As some other posters said, it breaks up the monotony for the sales staff, and they really enjoy chatting with me and finding new things for me to buy. It's really important to be calm, confident, and fun about it. It is fun! They'll get into the spirit if you're owning it.

For shoes.. I'll often only go to self-serve places. Sometimes DSW, and sometimes department stores at the end of the season, when all of the markdown stuff is arranged by size. I'm not uncomfortable shopping for shoes, but most stores are simply not carrying my size (11) in their inventory. It's a bummer to see something really cute and then it's not available. So I don't court temptation, and only really shoe shop when I can see what my options are. I buy most of my shoes online.

[Kiwi Primrose]

I have had nothing but good treatment when buying for myself and if fitting is a problem I discuss it with the SA.

[londonman111]

I do agree most SAs don't really care as long as you are polite. I personally prefer shopping online as much easier and with amazon this becomes very easy as can even use amazon lockers to get it delivered.

[nikinylons]

I went out and shopped at stores for years. It was more of a thrill and finding acceptance than it was finding something that fit exactly right. It was fun, scary, fulfilling, and aggravating at the same time. What felt and looked good in the exciting moment at the store, when I got home didn't fit well at all. If the SA was even a shred patronizing and made me uncomfortable, I was uncomfortable and made quick irrational buying decisions. After all of that those years, now I buy online at home from www.crossdresser.com. I'm not paid to promote them but rather a satisfied customer of their outfits that are truly made to fit men. Women's outfits rarely fit us well and why out yourself through all the BS other than the satisfaction of making it through it to say that you did it? Once you get over the search for validation by going out into public and buying things that aren't made to fit you, you will be much more content in who you are. Just my opinion from lots of scary experiences. Enjoy it while you can dear! Cheers! :)

[Eva Bella]

+1 for crossdresser.com (Suddenly Fem)

It's a wonderful site - they design the clothing themselves and make much of it right here in the United States. I know a lot of girls who have great clothes from there.

[Jessicajane]

This is conjecture of course but I strongly suspect that most sales assistants guess very quickly...and just don't care they want a sale and as long as you conduct yourself in an appropriate manner they will afford you the same courtesy they give other women...sometimes even a little more..

Why do I think this...well firstly when we go in to a women's clothes shop we figure that we are the only one that has done so that day...errrr wrong ...very probably...having spoken to many many SA over time from various shops they get on average 2-3 men buying and they pretty much guess its for them each time..they often will say nothing or go along with the pretense of girlfriend or wife to help us not feel uncomfortable...but they know..

Of course occasionally a man will buy for his girlfriend and wife but the vast majority of men buying clothes in a size that will fit them are read pretty much straight away...

The thing is not to be stressed by this but understand that they don't care...seriously...they don't...they want to make a sale and that's it....

sure there will be the exception to the rule SA 's who either lives under a rock or are just plain rude...guess what ..women get that themselves all the time...a rude SA is rude to a cross section of people an not just trans women...

I have shopped for womens clothes for years now both as a man and as Jessica, only on one or two occasions have I had anything other than a pleasant experience... once they took 5 min to decide if I could try on a bra in an empty shop...they eventually decided I could ...pfff seriously...!!, the other time the woman said "oh your one of them.." she was young and the next week she was gone...lol I either scarred her off or she realized she was not cut out for retail......and that is the only negativity of any type out of hundreds of visits to the stores....

Moral of the post...go shop in confidence and get something that fits and looks good...don't stress, don't rush and enjoy xx

[Lacey New]

I recall having a nice conversation with a very lovely middle aged SA at a Vanity Fair Outlet where I was en drab but purchased three pair of panties, a lovely size 42 nylon and lace camisole and a pair of petti-pants. She was commenting on how she was disappointed that these lovely things were getting difficult to find anymore and that very few people appreciate them as they did a few years ago. Naturally, I agreed - she just smiled. I am sure she knew who would be wearing them.

[Tracy Irving]

After all of that those years, now I buy online at home from www.crossdresser.com. I'm not paid to promote them but rather a satisfied customer of their outfits that are truly made to fit men.

I can't speak to whether or not they fit better but I have been able to find more than enough well fitting clothing designed for women. The racks at the thrift stores in my area are filled with more items than I have room for. Not to mention all the retail stores. Clothes, clothes everywhere! It does take more time than clicking a button online but that is part of the fun.

[joank]

I was going through the check out at Target with sleepwear PJ's and other stuff for my wife (really) and the SA(guy) says it (bottoms) 'will look really good on you.' I agreed and kept on packing the items.

[gownman]

There is a very pretty lingerie clerk of oriental descent at the Dillard's store where I shop. Quite soon after I started shopping there, she figured out that I was buying things for myself. We have become friendly; she always says hello and gives me her sweet smile. She knows what I like and I never buy anything except from her.

[susan54]

I shop and try on as man and woman but I keep to the same shops and the SAs know I am male. They say they occasionally see men shopping and they suspect it is for themselves but daren't say anything in case they cause offence and they say they would love to help especially when they believe he is making a mistake. It pays to come clean.

[joanna4]

I am a sales associate and I know what people are up to but shoplifting is quite obvious and a concern for us.

[Joanne108]

I had one negative interaction recently. I was at a drugstore buying some makeup and pantyhose. I was fully dressed as a woman and I thought I looked damn good.
I went in walked around. It was amazingly freeing to not have to worry abut buying women’s things. I took my stuff to the cashier, waited in line to be cashed out. The cashier made some remark about my voice. I said “I have a cold.” I did. Then she said, “You are too tall for a woman, I think you are you not a real a woman”.
Before i could reply the woman behind me in line said “She is jealous because you are a pretty woman and she is an old hag.” Then this nice woman turned to the cashier and said "My daughter is taller than this lovely woman! I think you owe this lady an apology."
The cashier muttered something about having a bad day and half apologized. And that was it all in about 30 seconds. I said thanks to the woman and that was it.
I checked myself back in the car everything looked good. i went home.

[Jenny22]

For many years I've always bought my tons of feminine stuff as a guy. I've only had one SA ask me if a dress fit. I said yes, I know my size. She was the embarassed one!

[MelanieAnne]

I've never been asked if something was for me. But I have been asked "is this a gift". I just say yes.

[ambigendrous]

I've never had a bad reception from an SA, but I had an interesting conversation with the owner of a nail salon where I was a regular customer. I had been going there for probably 5 years and we were talking about "regular" customers. She said that she actually preferred having male customers - she noted that her female customers tended to be fickle: if another shop had a sale, or dropped their prices even $1 then the ladies tended to leave to save a buck. On the other hand, the male customers tended to be more loyal - once they found a place they liked they were customers for life! I went to that salon for about 10 years, until I retired. Now I use a salon that is about a mile from my house rather than driving 20 miles to that old salon.

[DIANEF]

About an hour ago I bought myself some nice heeled boots at a local store. Was in drab and a male SA served me, all fine. Just as i was getting the receipt a young female SA said, 'you'll look good in those'. Surprised myself by instantly responding, 'yes, depends what I'm wearing them with'. She smiled at me, I smiled back and I left.

[Stephanie47]

Many years ago there was a woman's clothing store that was a small independent store that had a small sign at the door which said it welcomed cross dressers. Within the last five or so years there was actually a news piece on local television about a resale store that solicited cross dressers as customers.

I've related my shopping trip once or twice on this forum. I was looking for a particular full slips by Velrose. I love the lacy hems on Velrose slips. I stopped in at a Catherine's on Southcenter Blvd. You'd think an alien creature with a ray gun arrived to decimate the human population. I could see the racks with the slips from the window so I knew exactly where to go. I was attired in casual male clothing; slacks and a shirt with a collar and shined shoes. Face was cleanly shaven. The two middle age (40's to low 50's) women were jittery. I don't know if it was prior experiences or personal beliefs that made them so, but, my entire time there was less than cordial. Nothing rude was said, but, the body language and lack of assistance told it all. I knew my size. That's really easy with full slips. I did buy two slips; one black and one white.

As I have grown in my love for Velrose slips I decided to purchase some half slips with the same lacy hem as the full slip. Years later I shopped at the same store and the sales associates were different but not really very helpful. Again, they were middle age. The store did not have any in white. So I stopped on the way home at a Catherine's at the SeaTac Mall, now called The Commons, where a youthful woman was energetic and very helpful. I found out from her the slip had been discontinued and out of stock in white. She was willing to call the stores in Tacoma and Lakewood. I told her I lived near there and I would stop in on the way home, which I did. Again, the reception at each was enthusiastic.

My experiences have been for the most part very cordial. Once in a while you encounter some young girls who probably are new to the job and do not have much experience interacting with cross dressers. It seems most of the large retailers have training sessions that tell their employees how to interact with us. I think most know, especially if they are working for commissions, that loyalty is earned and then the bucks flow. As with any store, if you encounter a snitty person file a complaint.

[Bluesman]

I buy most of my clothes, both male and female, online now, but I do sometimes pick up some online orders at Nordstroms. The first comment I got from a SA was simply, "Oh, that's a cute skirt" but I definitely felt like she knew it was for me. I just grinned and said "Yes, I think so too." A couple of other times, picking up a dress or negligee (XL, I'm 6'4") the SA has asked if I'd like to try it on first. I haven't had the nerve to do that, but it did give me a little thrill. I kind of miss the titillation of these encounters. I'm totally in the closet except for my wife, so I kind of enjoy the idea that another woman knows what I'm "up to."

[Teri Ray]

I have purchase many items while drab. (most in fact) and I have often been asked "Are these for you?" My standard reply is to just smile and say "well you never know".

Never been hassled and more often than not been treated very nice.

[Lily Catherine]

One SA I personally know happens to know. I wasn't too blatant, but she knew after a while and doesn't seem to care. She was still pretty helpful though, but I can't be bothered with what she actually thinks behind my back.

[suzanne]

I've replied once to this thread already, but I want to be a bit more emphatic. I am convinced that the majority of dress shop sales staff actually LIKE crossdressers as customers. I say this because the ones I know are always happy to see me come in, and the ones who haven't met me before greet me with respect and act as though they deal with crossdresssers every day. No big deal. At my favorite store, they want hugs when I arrive and when I leave. They even tell of arguing amongst themselves about who gets to serve me, like "My turn!" "No, mine!"

Why is this? I never get the whole picture, but they tell me I'm a nice person. But it's more than that. When I enter a shop, I'm always in a cheerful mood, because hey, shopping is fun, right? I'm always game to try on whatever they show me, even if it isn't what I came in for, because you just never know when you have a non standard (for a woman) body shape. Frankly, I'll play dress up all day if they want. It's fun! For their part, I think it's not every day they see a man in a dress. Some SAs I know tell me they think of me when they see certain pieces in their incoming stock and wonder how it would look on me. Of course I'm happy to oblige. But another part seems to be that they get satisfaction from helping a tentative newcomer and helping them to become happy, confident and knowledgeable.

[susan jackson]

It's always a good way to find out of Sales Assistants actually listen to what you say:

When buying lipsticks, I tend to remark 'it's a pretty colour, isn't it. I think it'll suit me'
When buying clothes, and the Sales Assistant asks if I have got the correct size, I reply 'hope so - it's the same size that I usually wear'

Although I have a legal female name, I sometimes have to go to the chemist to pick up a prescription in male mode, and when the pharmacist says 'has she had these tablets before?' I answer 'yes, I have'!

[Abbey11]

I did a colour match at Urban Decay, I was in drab mode, they don't have a device to colour match they have to apply to your face there and then so while I was at it decided to show a couple of Abbey pics, we then had a great long discussion about how the SA has a couple of cd friends that she helps with makeup and style, was a very girly chat and a lovely experience she also invited over a couple of other SA's 1 female and 1 male.
Also while in Boots checking my colour match now that it's winter, 1 of the SA's gave me the biggest smile which kind of read ' I know what your upto' lol

The 1 main frustration I have with shopping in stores is that I do my research beforehand online of what I want and which stores have what, I'll then head to the stores to look at the dresses, skirts etc in person and I have to say, and this is no exaggeration, 80+% of the time they don't have what I'm looking for in store :sad:

[ellbee]

Earlier this month I began a new relationship with an "online SA" -- an eBay seller I first bought from, then continued our subsequent business via email.


She's been amazing, and I'm not shy about letting her know that fact. And obviously she knows the stuff is for me, as I simply straight out told her early on! :D

She's hunted down specific items for me (for cheaper than other sellers), taken photos & measurements, gives her opinion on stuff, recommends things, assists with what kind of outfit I could build with the piece, even taken photos of her modelling some things, ha! Really goes the extra mile.

She now has a great sense of things I'd like. Plus it helps that both our interests overlap (total leggings junkies, for example), as do our tastes. So, we do like to gab a lot.


Just today I received a package from her. Included was a Christmas card with a personalized hand-written note. :thumbsup:


I have fun with it, just being open & honest. She gets a kick out of it all, and apparently looks forward to getting my emails, as do I, hers. I'd guess that she doesn't have this level of interaction with most of her customers -- if any others, for that matter.

And I don't share my whole life-story of CD'ing or anything. I try to keep on-topic, but sometimes "sneak" in some related things -- though only to give her a better understanding of where I'm coming from, which then helps her that much more in assisting me.


No, it's not my 1st time doing this with the whole "online SA" thing, either. And it's only been really positive experiences. Not only is it beneficial to both parties, but it's also a lot of fun, too. Just two "girls" who enjoy clothes, talking about clothes, and swapping something (money & clothing) that the other wants. Yeah, she's being nice because she wants my business, but it really does go deeper than that, as it does "come through" our conversations.

And admittedly, I do intentionally "girl it up" just a bit when chatting with them. I mean, how could one not? LOL. Nothing too obvious or obnoxious or over-the-top. But it's a perfect opportunity to do so. It's lots of fun, plus I think it helps put them at ease a bit more... Not that they necessarily need it, but they do open up that much more when it's almost like they're talking to another GG, despite the fact that in the back of their head the whole time, they do know it's a guy on the other end.


Yeah, GG SA's -- whether in-person or online -- are the bomb! :hugs: :love:

[AKADonna]

I'm happy now that the Christmas shopping season is basically over and the temps soon will be gone. The regular SA's at my favorite stores know me and carry on with me as one ot the girls, but with the temps there can be so much judgement, shock, surprise and embarrassment.

[Steph54]

In guy mode I've gone to stores offering bra fittings. That was fun and embarrassing.

As for clothes I like to shop at Ross dress for less. Search for 10 or 12 items then go to the fitting room. They have male and female areas with a common guardian checking your items. You are only allowed 6. I love it when they see dresses, skirts,tops and ask "you want to try these on". "Yes please" I reply. I Go into the men's area and try them all on. Most often keep 1 or 2 of the items. Give back the discards and the return with the next bunch to try on. Reactions have been extremely varied but have never been refused.

Again in guy mode, a long time ago back in the early 90's, was at a dress shop in an outlet mall. Picked out several dresses and asked the SA if it was ok to try them on. went into the changing room tried them all on and found 2 I liked. When I came out there was a security guard there wanting to know what I was doing and demanding to see my ID. I told him I was looking for a new dress and passed him my drivers license. I'd done nothing wrong so he let me go. I did not buy the dresses and I left. That experience has never happened since.

[ambigendrous]

...I Go into the men's area and try them all on. Most often keep 1 or 2 of the items. Give back the discards and the return with the next bunch to try on.

I have an "etiquette" question: when trying on clothes at a store, is it better to leave the items hanging in the changing room area, or return them to the racks where you found them? I usually return them to the racks but I don't know if that's correct...

[Tracy Irving]

Just outside the changing rooms but not in the store itself there should be racks to hang the items you do not intend to purchase. A store employee puts then back.

[LookingGlass]

Good ol' Kohl's! My first foray shopping in public was there and I got a young cashier who enthusiastically hoped I enjoyed the purchase knowing dang well I wasn't shopping for anyone else. Happening in front of other customers nearly made me turn white as a sheet. Almost never went back until I found something online that was in stores... now I race to rack up points for the Kohl's cash rewards and it has become the first place the bestie and I go for shopping.

[TheHiddenMe]

I've written before about the sales angels I've dealt with at Nordstrom. They said they are happy to help me because I enjoy it so much (I asked, because I didn't really understand). I was touched and in a state of shock. I've had good experiences at a Dress Barn too.

Since then I ran across this article in vox: http://www.vox.com/2015/2/25/8103861/retail-job-description. The story confirms what my sales angels said.

I know one thing for sure. I try to be extra nice because I don't want to mess things up for the next CD that comes to them.

[Janine cd]

I remember buying a couple of bras at a local Penney's. When the sales person finished ringing up the items, she commented that I would look very lovely in my selection. I'm sure I blushed when I said thank you.

[Sissy_in_pink]

There are only 2 stores that I go to that the SA know I'm buying for me, the rest ask me is it for my wife, I say no I'm divorced, then they say oh for your girlfriend, I so no I don't have one, but they just don't seem to catch on dang.
My doctor was real quick at catching on after telling her that I wanted my right foot xrayed do to extreme pain in it, when she asked why I told her that I couldn't wear high heeled shoes and wanted to know what was causing the pain, she then immediately asked me if I was a crossdressing so I said yes, she got very excited at the news. :)

[Steph54]

In stores that have an SA at the fitting room. You have to return the items to the fitting room monitor. The number you took in matches the number you bring out

[Julie MA]

Tried on some body suits at Macy's yesterday, OVER a bulky pair of men's boxers. The signs about same sex, ha ha, loss monitors, and the shoddy sealant around the dressing room mirror, had me wondering if there were 2 way mirrors w cameras. With the lack of SAs, can't imagine they would have the staff for that anyway.

[Becky Blue]

Bought a skirt at a shop in a discount mall today... it was a black stretchy tightish skirt, no need to try on..went to pay the SA smiled, asked me if I had that store card, i said no, she said would you like one, I said no thanks. I paid and as I turned to go she said enjoy.. she knew it was for me, even though the skirt was a medium.

[nikkiwindsor]

Something tells me that a few of the SAs would love to be invited to place dress up!

[BrendaPDX]

Hi Caitlyn, For all of my apprehension and fear, sometimes I am almost shaking, l have never had a bad experience. I have had three sales associates who were very helpful and I had the feeling they new. I have never shopped enfem, I have always wanted to but not yet. I have never been caught, not yet anyway. But I love the adrenaline rush. Take care Brenda

[Allison Chaynes]

As an SA myself, I can tell you that not all SAs know or care who you are buying for. You'd be surprised how many men buy women's attire and no one thinks anything of it, except for two occasions:

1) a sister called the store and asked about the CD policy (there isn't one), and
2) back in March, a sister asked my peer to help track down a specific style of panty she wanted for herself.

With that said, it's cool if you want to tell an SA that you CD. BUT when you start trying to show pix of yourself in panties, you are crossing a line and not helping the CD image!!!! This happened to my sister when she worked at VS.

[SherriePall]

While I have had many good experiences shopping (and many wonder memories of special SA's), I have had only one noteworthy bad one.
I once went into a clothing store after work (not well dressed) and was looking at some juniors wear inside the door when an older SA came over and informed me that they were for juniors.
I then asked where the misses fashions were. Rather snootily she pointed me to them where I selected three or four dresses to try on. She sent me to an upstairs dressing room where I tried them, but decided none really begged me to take them home.
I bid the SA goodbye and left.
A week or so later I was talking to my beauty products SA about the experience and she (a lovely looking young woman) told me that she had stopped there one time and got pretty much the same cold reception I got. I guess neither of us measured up to the store's customer standards.

[Judith96a]

I don't know if SAs generally prefer / enjoy serving crossdressers but... Here's two recent experiences (both en femme)

I went shopping in M&Co in Buckingham a couple of months ago. I saw a dress that I liked and asked one of the SAs if I could try it on. She said yes but I got the feeling that she was uncomfortable. A few minutes later one of her colleagues checked with me to see if there was anything I needed etc, very chatty, brought me another dress to try etc. I saw the original SA as I left the store but hot the impression that she was avoiding me. And, yes, I did buy the dress!

A month later, I was shopping in Leamington Spa. I went into 'Roman' where, again, I saw a dress that I wanted to try on. I asked an SA if I could try it on and got an enthusiastic "Yes". This young lady spent the next 30 minutes bringing me dresses, giving her opinion on sizes and fit, enlisting two different colleagues to help etc, etc - on a busy Saturday afternoon! Again I bought the dress.

Don't get me wrong, I've no criticism of the folks in Buckingham. The store there dealt with the original SA's discomfort (and me) in a professional manner. In both cases I got both assistance and encouragement.

[Dana44]

I only had one time that I bought girly clothes and was at a Walmart and the SA was ringing it up and she looked at the size and then me. She asked, are these for you. I said yes. She said why do nice looking looking men do this. I did not have an answer just paid it out and left with my merchandise. That was years ago. But now wherever I have bought anything, It is always cordial and nothing said. Even at the thrift stores.

[mona lisa]

I would figure for SA's they mostly see it as more commissions for them.

[MeredithG]

Sometimes I call the store in advance and ask the SA if I can get help buying some women's clothes for myself. You'll know right away if they are willing to help you and a good one will give her name, ask for yours, and tell you to ask for her when you come in.

[MissVirginia-Mae]

When I first starting buying, I would hit the thift stores on 1/2 off day and i would end up with at least 2 carriages of dresses, sleepwear, bras, panties, slips and girdles.
The SA's got to know me and actually pointed some nice items out to me on sale day.
Only the old women customers would cast a disapproving eye over at me or when next to me.
The SA's were nothing but polite.

[minna_xxxx]

My SO was shopping some clothes for herself and I was accompanying her. She was trying on a blouse and asked me to get one size smaller. So I went to the rack and tried to find on. A friendly SA approached me and asked if I need some help. I asked the size and she quickly found one. Then she aske me "would you like to try it?" I guess that I was so comfortable browsing with female clothes that the SA immediately read that I am no an average male shopping with his wife...

[AltairaMorbius]

Not so long ago I was shopping for Vanity Fair granny panties (size 9) at Penny's, the SA who helped me offered me an in store coupon for half off! In year's past i would have need terrified to have an SA even approached me.

Cheers,
Amy

[Lucy23]

Earlier today I was buying leggins and a top. There was a young woman working the cash register. When she saw the items, her eyes bounced from them to me, to them to me, then she ranged up the leggins, and again looked at me... One could easily think that the leggins were my size, while the top was at first glance smaller; but what are the chances of any guy buying such things?

[StephanieM]

I've never even received a dirty look much less a negative comment while shopping. Usually I don't have a SA helping me shop, but the ladies at the cash registers have either assumed I was shopping for the wife or didn't care.

The only time I had help was at Payless where this nice young lady saw me looking and helped me find what I was looking for. She even advised me how to break in the high heel shoes I picked out. I thanked her for her sensitivity as I finished paying and was leaving the store.

[julia marie]

Similar experience at Payless. They just want to help. I have bought boots and great sandals with their help

[Jennifer Michelle]

I've only bought women's shoes in person and that was at a nearby Payless. I have gone there a couple times, and I know at least one of the Store Associates knows me by name she even said how she would like to see how much shoe collection is coming along. :) So far i haven't bought any clothes in person, but I've traveled to the mall and went in a few stores and can't seem to find my size. So at this point my clothes are exclusively bought from internet sites. Thus far it is just easier to shop online over all, and I'm not as paranoid about someone seeing me. Though I have been tempted a couple times to go into Victoria's everything just looks awesome inside there lol.

[Amy R Lynn]

I can honestly say that I have never had a bad experience from a SAS. Now, I'm not naive enough to think that it could never happen. But, in my experience its less common to have a bad experience. They usually either don't bat an eye, or make a comment about how pretty the clothes are. Hoestly, I think I feel more anxious about it than they do.

[AKADonna]

I learned early on that I have credentials that tends to get any SA's attention! They are called Visa, Mastercard, American Express! Most Sa's work on commissions and I have found that they much rather deal with male customers who make decisions and buy something rather than those who browse and browse and leave lots of clothes to be refolded and re hung - without buying anything. I am a regular at certain ladies stores and there, I am called by DonnaSue!

[Johninabra]

I have been told that the Lane Bryant stores are sensitive to men shopping for ladies clothes for themselves so I checked out one of their stors on a recent trip into San Antonio. As soon as I entered the store a SA approached me and asked if she could help. I told her I was looking for a 46b bra and she showed me the only style in the store that size. As I was looking at it she told me that my wife could return it if it did not fit. I then told her it was for me and she did not hesitate and asked if I would like to try it on. We went into a fitting room and she hooked it up and adjusted the straps. I liked the fit just fine but the bra had too much padding door me to wear in a stealth mode. She said she would be right back and came back with some bras in 44c and an extender. I tried on about 6 bras and settled on the one I liked best. I will try to shop there often.

John

[pantyhoselvr kendra]

All of the SA that i have encountered have been very helpful, I always shop with the wife and that probably helps

[mackemlass]

Couple of years back I bought myself some Rosie lingerie from M&S, the cashier said "You've chosen well, very feminine". I said "Well that's the idea". She went on to say that she wished her partner would buy her something like this, then offered me a gift receipt. When I said "That won't be necessary, thank you", the look on her face was priceless.

[ringo]

I was in a store ("Earth, music and ecology", weird name i know) with my girlfriend and i saw those really beautiful shoes. I assumed there wasn't my size but my girlfriend told me to ask. So i asked the SA in a stuttering local language if there was big size (mine) and she went to the back to see. I was really happy when she came back with a box. While trying them she told me they looked really beautiful. It was the perfect size and they were in sales, perfect. I finally bought them. Other SAs were looking at me but they didn't say anything beside "thank you for your purchase !".

Another time i wanted to buy a short, so i went to a store with my girlfriend again and built up the courage to try them in the changing room. It went well, the SA (a man) had a curious gaze but never asked any question and seemed more bothered if the size fit or not as it probably was the biggest one they had.

That experience (among others) proved me that SAs only want to help (and also get some money), i recommend asking the SAs for some advice before buying something, it can be really useful and can save you money. The only thing we have to fear is fear itself ;)

[Erin77]

I love shopping at La Vie En Rose. The sales associates there have been wonderful. They always approach me to help and when they find out the clothes are for me they really get into it. One newer girl once said that if my wife removed the hygiene strip she couldn't return the item. I winked and said it's for me a I know it fits. She had no reply :D

[lokkee]

I find myself going to Goodwill and the last time I went I saw someone I knew and I was looking at shoes and I acted like I was buying them for a craft project. Ya know, wine bottle holder or something. But I have had that feeling. I go to the superstore early in the morning when it's generally older people working. One day I bought, a bra, 3 different pairs of panties, pantyhose, and something else. She gave me this look, never forget it. It wasn't an evil look it was more of a look she knew and she was one of those kinky older ladies so more of a "I know what you are doing. Bad boy."

I actually have more of a worry about someone I know see me than the sales person. For all they know, you have a girlfriend or mom sent you on a errand. I always find it entertaining when I put up panties or whatever.

[JeanTG]

For the last couple of years I have always been open, saying I'm buying for myself. Sometimes I just browse, get what I need, and go to the cashier. But if I'm looking for a new dress or outfit, I ask the SAs for help by telling them approximately what I'm looking for, and my usual size. I'm known at two stores, and the SAs let me use a fitting room, and bring me some suggestions to try on. I've also bought a bra from one of them (they cater to plus-sized women), and was fit by the SA. A couple have even seen me in bra, panties and pantyhose while helping me try on/adjust clothes. So far I've only shopped in drab; but I'm working up the courage to shop en femme next time, the last SA that helped me encouraged me to.

[lingerieLiz]

One never knows. I've had mostly no problems. Been asked who they were for and said me. One time the girl waiting on me ran off the floor. Never saw her again. Other times SAs have been very nonchalant. A couple time when bra was obvious SA refused to accept the clothes were for me. Funniest was when I went to buy a bra and SA kept saying your wife would like this. I told her it was for me. My projection was obvious she started laughing and acting like she was looking for the hidden camera. A few months ago I returned a pair of jeans for my wife and picked up a couple pairs of panties from online sales. The girl acted like she had a hot potato. I reached in and pulled them out and put them back. She acted embarrassed.

[JeanTG]

I've only been laughed at once and that was nearly 30 years ago, at a lingerie shop. Even back then I had a couple of lingerie shops that knew me and were more than kind and accepting. One young SA was so nice I'd drop in from time to time just to chat when I saw it was quiet in the store and she was very kind. I was wrestling with gender issues back then just as I am now and she was a good listener and offered good advice. The shop where I was laughed at had something sexy I wanted to buy (I forget what, I think panties, bra and garter set), and was run by two older ladies. Never went back. Vote with your feet and your purse! Another store was a very high end lingerie store where I was encouraged to try things, and they said they had several male customers. Again, very kind and courteous service. Once in a department store when buying a packaged set of panties the sales lady said "you might find these on the big side for you" in a very nonchalant way. She was right. Another department store where I bought a dress, the cashier, very young and pretty, probably read me, gave me the sweetest smile, and sincerely thanked me.

It's 2017 and I wouldn't give the time of day to a place that laughed at me.

[April T]

Last weekend I bought some clothes at the mall. I was looking at leggings and the sales assistant told me they were one size fits all. I told her they were for me so I was unsure about fitting into them. She immediately told me to go try them on. I had a bra on and my breast forms in a coat pocket so I slipped them into my bra and then I asked if she had any tops to go with the leggings. She then proceeded to find about seven tops for me to try on. Eventually, we found one that we both agreed looked great on me. Sadly we also found two that were pretty but too small.

[Scarlett398]

I have never had a bad experience with a sales assistant as well. I do most of my shopping in the juniors department at Khol's - great selection of what I like to wear at really super prices and they give you really nice discount coupons through the mail. Other places I find really good quality clothing at great prices are: TJ Max, Ross, Marshalls, Walmart (which is the place I buy all my tights - Hanes opaque shear to waist for $5.88 - they're fabulous. I also occasionally buy some costume jewelry and I also buy almost all of my makeup and makeup remover there as well and I love their self checkout stations), DSW for boots or booties, and JC Pennys on line for boots, jewelry, panties, and costume jewelry - I have all items shipped directly to the store and pick them up in customer service on the second floor. One other place locally is a consignment shop called Plato's Closet. On rare occasions, I'll find a cool skater or flounce skirt in there.
Every once in a while, when I go through a checkout line, and I'm buying skirts and tops, the sales lady with say "these are really cute, they're gonna look great on you" and then I just chuckle and say "I think so too, I have quite a few just like these and they not only look great on my, they're so very comfortable as well". Then they chuckle and say something like "buy the way, I have an extra coupon I can scan right now for an additional 20% everything off today!" I say "Wow! I really appreciate that and when you give me the receipt today if there is a survey site to go to and put in a survey on you, make sure to write down your name in my survey and put a note in there to let your manager see my very positive survey of how you helped me so much today and how nice you were to me today!" I always make a point to go to the site that day and put in a good word for the sales clerk!" They don't have an easy job and don't make a pile of money in retail sales so anything I can do to give them some positive feedback is important to me and to them! That's it for today...Oh yeah, I also buy some makeup at our local Walgreens. I have a lady who always does a super job of answering any questions I have and she always gives me a heads up as to the best deals of that day going on in the makeup section...Now that's it for today...thanks for reading my post...Sincerely, Scarlett

[CDJoyce]

The only time I bought a skirt I told the sale assistant I wanted it for a fancy dress party. She didn't bat an eyelid and measured me.

[Judy-Somthing]

When I bought a wedding gown at a thrift store last year the SA said "it's nice to see this gown getting a new home"

I wonder what kind of home she was thinking it would have?

[Randee]

Most of my experience with SA's has been in dance wear stores and swimwear shops for one piece swimsuits. Once the sales agent knew I was purchasing for me, it opened up a whole lot more chances to try on outfits in the store. I really enjoyed trying on turtleneck leotards and tights and stepping out to have the sales assistant zip me up and unzip me after I modeled in the big mirrors in the store. Same in the bathing suits.

[CONSUELO]

I like to shop in person for clothing because of the excitement of discovery. I do shop on line also but it is a sterile experience in comparison. Always give the SA's a big smile and I am prepared to chat with them. I ask how they are, how busy they have been and comment on good looking clothes. When done politely and openly -don't be creepy- they will always respond to someone being pleasant.
If asked I will acknowledge that the item is for me but I don't preface the conversation with that information. Working in a large store can be very dull and so I believe we should always try to make a person's day as pleasant as possible. Also I feel a responsibility as a cross dresser as I feel that my behavior reflects on the cross dressing community and I don't want to leave a bad impression and have the assistant believe that all crossdressers are boorish or rude.

[HollyGreene]

I had one occasion when buying panties and the SA gave me that knowing look. I gave her a quizzical look in return and she said "I'm saying nothing.". I said "I'm just buying a gift for my wife". She said "That's what they all say". I said "They're for my wife. These are size 8. I wear size 12". Stunned silence followed.

(UK sizes BTW!)

[Stephanielawrence]

I've always shopped in guy mode and have purchased everything from cosmetics, lingerie, dresses and shoes. I've never had an issue or have I ever had a SA ask if it was for me. The only time I've volunteered that info was when I went to purchase a wig. I was tiered of the cheaper looking ones so decided I would purchase one from a wig salon. No one said a thing and were very helpful with me trying many on. I would go back to that store for another in an instant!

[Jenniferathome]

... Does anyone else enjoy being 'caught' ?

You can only be 'caught' if you are doing something wrong.

[AKADonna]

I am required by my wife, to tell the SA's that "this is for me". She makes me do that to provide some humiliation, which she knows that i love! (but not at that uncomfortable moment!)

[Fiona123]

These stories amaze me. The one and only dress I own I bought at a charity shop. I don't know how I did it. The male cashier could not have been nicer though. The panties and bra that I own I bought at stores with self checkout.

[Cynthia_0101]

In the last little while, I have given up on the fears of shopping. I used to go into the store with a list and say they were presents for the wife, Now I just go in pick up want I want, pay for it and leave. If they do have any idea it's for me they have not said so yet.

[ZenladyCD5]

Long, long ago when I was in a Fredericks of Hollywood store (In regular guy mode.) browsing around, I viewed a display shelf of various colors of opera length satin gloves. I picked up a pair and examined the color, quality, etc. Next thing I knew, a sales associate came up to me and asked if I wanted to try them on. :o I didn't want to create a scene and have other customers looking at me trying them on and so forth, so I politely declined and continued browsing as normal. I love satin gloves. :) Whether the SA knew they were for me or not, I don't know, though I suspect she knew they would be because at the end of the browsing, I bought 2 pairs of gloves and she thanked me for shopping and she hoped the gloves would fit me well.

[Susan Thomas]

One time I was at Penney's to purchase some Vanity Fair panties. The SA asked me if I needed some help. I said yes, even though I knew exactly where my favorite panties were located. The SA were very helpful, as she showed me the various styles and colors. I asked her what size would someone like me would wear. She then took a pair of panties off of the rack and held them against me. I was in heaven! As I checked out, she complimented me on my choice of colors. In retrospect, I wish i would have had the courage to ask to help me pick out a nice bra. Anyway, I am quite sure that she knew who the panties were for. I did give her an outstanding rating in the online review.

[IleneD]

I have gotten so that I will only shop for women's clothing when I'm in full battle dress.

[AndreaCalifCD]

When I was younger, I use to think that having a wedding ring on would make excuses so much more easier/plausible...

Now I'm married, if its for something I'm not trying on, I usually take it off - just to keep them wondering! :)

[marybeth_1967]

Thought about this question a lot. I think the reason this comes up so often on the boards is that thoes of us not out have a special relationship to SA's. For many of us that are not out, the SA is the closest person to have a little visibility to our deepest secrets. They may be the only person that know about our private side. They may be the only person other than a significant other as to the style of clothing, shoes or intimates that we buy. Whether we tell them it's for us or for someone else, we leave knowing that at least one person may know about our secrete. The excitement of nearly confessing or at least sharing my purchases with the SA has always been terifyi g but also exciting for me. I love when they complement my ability to put together an outfit or make that little joke, "so is this for you or are you in the dog house". I generally don't push it unless I get a very welcoming reception. I think we overlook the intimacy that we share with SA, if it is know to them or not. I know that in many cases they are the only person that knows that I purchased a certain blouse, skirt or heels that no one else may ever know.

[Beverley Sims]

I like a 36B bra, they are not a common line in the style I am looking for and I have been asked on a number of occasions if I wish to try one on for size.

Yep, sure every time for me.

This has had nothing to do with me being in drab and admitting my personal interests.

I think they just know, or did they smell the perfume I am wearing? :-)

[jennifer0918]

I never shoped in victoria secrets en femme or in drab,I may do it en femme I know my bra and panties size so I was just thinking of asking the SA for my size.But if she asks if I would like to try them on, I will not miss on the opportunity.

[April T]

Last week I went to three different stores where I asked the SA if I could try some clothes on. SA's ranged from slight surprise to incredibly helpful. I do find that younger SA's tend to be less surprised. My experience is, if you are nice, they will be nice.

[Jennifer Soames]

I have had only positive reactions from SA. I think many of them love a change frog the same old stuff. I very recently visited a store that had moved location and I missed where they had gone. I was greeted liken a long lost friend and the SA, daughter of the owner, recalled the lingerie sets she had sold me. This was four years later.

We had a great girly time and she was soooo nice. She fitted me with some lovely bras and I left feeling very affirmed that I was accepted and respected.

Its an individual thing for each SA but overwhelmingly they just want to have a nice day that is interesting.