been a long time

[jennigrace]

I've been away for awhile. Went through another purge but had to come back. I'm still in the closet. Only my mother and my wife (both deceased) and a former girl friend ever knew about my cding. I've been stocking up and feel SOOO much better with my panties (24/7) and being able to fully dress when I'm alone. I'm seriously thinking about telling a couple friends and my daughter and son-in-law. Because of my community and church involvement I don't have a lot of free time to dress. I think if I told some friends I would be able to be able to dress more often. Any advice?

[IleneD]

Move to a new town. Start a new life from scratch.
Or....
just dress on your own, as you wish and don't flaunt it.

I am an older girl (64 yr) and just recently came out to my wife of 39 yrs; and this after a lifetime of dabbling around the edges of my CD. A different situation as yours', but one thing I learned (mostly from this forum) was to CURB MY ENTHUSIASM. Look both ways before you cross the street (or dressing). Be wise about how and to whom you make your personal announcement. Frankly, not everyone has a NEED TO KNOW, despite your bursting inner joy.

It's not a matter of Denial, or short-changing your inner femme. It's not even a matter of being dishonest with yourself or anyone else. It's smart, unless you're preparing yourself for a full TG transformation and looking to live full time En Femme.
Enjoy your dressing. Be discreet. Trust those friends and family whom you know you can trust with your life. Dress and GO somewhere. Take a vacation to Yourself. Shop in another town. Go to the Big City to see a show.
But I would check yourself before you unnecessarily disrupt your stable local life where many people apparently hold you in significant esteem and for reasons completely, remotely divorced from your Girl Side. If you're that kind of Good Guy, you should honor that and continue your community/church work. Just continue.

[JoannaCD]

I'd suggest that you start by reflecting on how your wife and mother took it and if it was positive use that information in guiding a discussion with your daughter first and let her decide about telling her husband. There is a chance that they already know. Then use their reception to guide you in further reveals. I understand your dilemma because I've been putting off that talk with my adult daughter. My wife is also deceased and my CDing was limited to bed which at the time was all I required except for a secret pair of heels which she didn't know about. I have a woman friend now who has seen Joanna and she understands this fetish, compulsion or whatever it is. Having someone to talk with who is accepting was very liberating to me but it's delayed that talk with my daughter. Good luck in working through this.

[Joyce Swindell]

Purging has always been an emotional highly thing for me and has never worked for long. Welcome back!

My opinion of sharing this with others depends on the relationship and the circumstances around that relationship. Like for instance....the guy is a red neck through and through...I prolly wouldn't tell him. But even then you can't be sure! He may be a crossdresser too! Even a gay friend could be highly opposed to a CD even though one would think they would be ok with it.

Basically what I think is if it is important enough personally that someone knows and it would make things better then go for it. If they have a problem with it then it is their problem but it may have a negative impact on you too...I.E. ....circumstances.

Generally speaking most don't have an issue with it. That's why when we go out in public dressed few even notice and if they do they don't care. However, in a small town/community you have to decide how bold to be.

Political answers I know but ...Hey....I'm on my lunch break. lol

I appreciate having this board to ramble on! Thanks to all the people involved in making this site and Merry Christmas Ya'all

[Stephanie47]

Hi Jennigrace. I read a post of December 2011 that stated your wife had passed away. If you are alone and are still purging it would appear there is some issue of self acceptance. Telling others will not necessarily mean more time to be en femme unless you intend to dress in front of them and way from home. Am I right? If you 'need' more time to be en femme I would suggest cutting back on your community involvement. I know too many people who are totally worn out, physically and mentally, because they 'volunteer' too much. Of course if you make your cross dressing general knowledge you may end up being shunned, and, therefore have a lot of time being en femme. If you're purging because of a lack of self acceptance 'outing' yourself may not bring societal acceptance to your doorstep.

[Lana Mae]

As stated here so many times, DO NOT PURGE! Store your stuff somewhere as the desire will come back! Condolences on your loss of family members! My advise is to tell those "with a need to know" ! Hugs Lana Mae

[jennigrace]

I'm an older cd too, 76

[CynthiaD]

I'm 68 myself, and my attitude is: OK, I've done the "male thing" like I was supposed to. I was an athlete in high school. I've worked on construction, and in male-only factories. I served in the Army. I got (and stayed) married. I supported four children until they were adults. I've paid my male dues!

Now, if I want to wear a dress, I'm darn well going to do it. No one has the right to tell me I can't.

Just my two cents.

[lingerieLiz]

We all have different desires and need for acceptance. I've been out most of my life. I'm one of the old ones around here. Now, I dress conservative in women's clothes and wear the same types of things as the women I associate with. The women recognize it and rarely say anything except where did you get that or that is nice.

While some of us have good experiences nothing is certain. Some have had terrible experiences. Once you come out you can't put it back in the closet. Some may accept you, but don't want to see anything from your fem side.