Is she?

[Lana Mae]

My daughter identifies female. She wears female panties and socks with female sneakers. Her pants and shirts are male, she says they are better with larger pockets and just fit better not clinging etc. She has no desire to be a male. Is she a crossdresser? She does not ID as one but... Hugs Lana Mae

[Dana44]

Well girls do not crossdress, they just took a claim for the male clothes and still look feminine. But in old times they did crossdress and was found out sometimes.

[sara66]

By our definition she is an over dresser.:heehee: It's a double standard.
Sara

[Pumped]

Lana, change the gender in your post and it would describe many of us here, except we would dress all the way down to the undies!

[Tracy Irving]

Over dresser, lol. Good one, Sara.

[Lorileah]

This is going to get bloody isn't it. Moderator note: This in not to become a whiny thread. It is not to become a flame the GG thread. By agreement on this site, NO she is not a crossdresser, she is a woman who wears things that are fashionable and common for her gender.

One definition:
A person who dresses in clothes normally only associated with the opposite gender. A man who dresses in womens clothes is a male to female (MtF) crossdresser, a woman who dresses as a man is a female to male (FtM) crossdresser. Note the bold words Normally associated with a gender, this on the female side is narrow...what article of clothing is associated with being a man that women do not wear NORMALLY? And are they presenting as a man would?

I expect this thread to be short

[Tracii G]

I would say no she is not.

[Rachael Leigh]

I've struggled with this aspect of how women dress and how it's no big deal, yes it does seem as if it's a double standard for
us who dress, but if you look deeper she's not going further ie wearing a beard( insuret wig here) she's not trying to walk
manly or in general blend in as a man. So no she isn't but with that said for us men who choose to present as women I've
always felt it just makes sense to do so if we are going to be in all female clothes otherwise we just look silly just my opinion. Not to say I do wear and blend my female with my male wardrobe at times

[Pat]

She does not ID as one...
Then she is not. It's really simple.

[immindy]

Nah , she just likes boys pants . I think that is what she said ? I like to wear my men's bomber jacket when dressed as Mindy . Is that because I am a trans woman, who although presents as a woman , and was born as a male, is a crossdresser who double crossdresses as a Mtf crossdresser cross dressing as a male . Nope , I just like my bomber jacket .

I know I am in a silly mood but yea :)

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Lana Mae:hugs: Now if we could just take a page out of the girls book and just wear what we want and OWN IT...:daydreaming:...

[phylis anne]

Interesting thoughts but she sounds just like a normal girl ,as to her choice in pants I agree ,I weara 40 mans but a 18-20 womens which I like better as the girl jeans accentuate my caboose:D but like your daughter feels the girls jeans just don't get it for pocket space

[docrobbysherry]

Not worth commenting on. Lorileah said it all!:thumbsup:

[Stephanie Julianna]

She's not. But it is another example of the inequity in standards of what is allowed for women but not allowed for men.

[Lana Mae]

OK, so she is just a tom boy. Enough said Thanks for your replies. Thanks Lorileah for clearing that up for me! Hugs Lana Mae

[Jane G]

Just let her be who ever she is. Appears very close to the norm, based on our daughter, for what that is worth.

[Kate Simmons]

I think she is just being herself my friend. :battingeyelashes::)

[Krisi]

Why don't you just ask her if she is a crossdresser?

[mikayla1964]

First of all who are we to comment on what someone else wears. In the big sceem of things it doesn't truly matter what anyone wears in the end we all will wear the same thing. No matter what we wear or what we like we are still the same person. So I like to wear women's clothes I'm still the same person on the inside in male or female clothes .So just don't worry on it and be happy . no one said everything in life is fair.. JMO

[susan jackson]

She is A PERSON...AN INDIVIDUAL

Like many people, she is not classed by what she wears.

To quote a certain television show from the 60's: "I am not a number, I am a free man"

[deebra]

Lets be fair to both sexes, if a man wears a bra he is a crossdresser, only one item qualifies; if she wears any piece of male clothing she is crossdressing and is a crossdresser????????

[TrishaLake]

My daughter wears whatever she wants , she displays femine and wears mostly girls clothes...my wife was worried she might be gay or whatever...i could care less. She is what she is , she appears to like boys and dresses more girls at 16 but you never know she might like girls. Again, so long as she is healthy I could care less...she seems happy to be her..

[Leslie Langford]

...no she isn't but with that said for us men who choose to present as women I've always felt it just makes sense to do so if we are going to be in all female clothes otherwise we just look silly just my opinion...

Aye, and there's the rub...and also the crux of why an arcane concept such as "crossdressing" even exists in the first place in today's world. "Who" is it that decides what are appropriate garments or footwear for men or women to wear? Just who are these folks, and by virtue of what authority are they acting? Who elected or appointed them? Did they consult any of us to determine what our thoughts on the subject might be?

And why was it perfectly acceptable for men in the 16th and 17th centuries to wear powdered wigs, make up, high heels, stockings with their knee-high breeches, colorful embroidered jackets trimmed with lace, and elaborate feathered hats etc. - but today, not so much? In fact, much of what they wore back then would be considered flamboyant or "gay" by some people nowadays, and an easy target for their derision.

Back around the turn of the last century, it was quite common for boys up to about the age of 5 to wear dresses (or, alternatively, short pants) and it was considered to be a big deal (and something of a rite of passage) when they finally graduated to long pants. Around the same time, pink was regarded as a strongly masculine color as opposed to being associated with the female gender as it is these days.

So what happened? Who decided to pull this switcheroo when it came to male and female clothing, and why? Yes, I can see why women often prefer pants over skirts and dresses from the standpoint of practicality, but the other stuff is purely a fashion choice that the mysterious who (and their agents and/or purveyors of social norms - "society") arbitrarily decide to impose upon us from time to time for no better reason than that they can, and we "sheeple" generally are too timid to go against the flow.

And if the argument is that GG's just naturally look better in traditionally "female" attire because of their innate curviness and hairlessness and that is why a non-passable crossdressing "man-in-a-dress" presents such a jarring visual...well, that's just sexism and a matter of social conditioning as to what is "acceptable" and what is not, and is not cast in stone. After all, beauty is in the eye of the beholder it is often said, and many GG's these days - particularly the plus size ones and ladies of color - are starting to push back strongly against the fashion industry's out-dated concepts of what still constitutes the gold standard of beauty these days...very tall, rail-thin, and generally Caucasian and blonde GG's exhibiting bored looks and vacant eyes. If anything, this should embolden us to question conventional standards of beauty as well, and why a man cannot look just as good in a floral dress and heels even if he is sporting facial stubble, a square jawline, and has a pronounced Adam's apple as well as a receding hairline.

Speaking for myself, I am starting to no longer consider that what I do as "crossdressing" in the way it is normally understood. "Cross" generally means "contrary", "in opposition to", or "against the grain" etc. If most women nowadays abhor wearing skirts, dresses, pantyhose, and heels and opt instead for pants, baggy tops, flip-flops, runners, and "menswear" in general, would it then not be fair to say that by wearing my traditionally female clothing this puts me in a separate, unique category outside of the typical male/female binary? Can we therefore argue that "crossdressing" is actually dressing androgynously or in a unisex manner, and that it should therefore no longer be stigmatized the way it is? Hmmm... ;)

[Krisi]

Let's get real here. It has always been permissible for a woman to wear certain things normally made for men. Not a jockstrap of course, but pants and shirts. Even hats.

You can argue all day long about whether that's fair or not, but it is reality. Farm women wear pants. Female factory women wear pants. Female trades workers wear pants. They are more practical for physical work. Shirts?, yep, most men's shirts have pockets. More practical except for large breasted women.

A female who binds her breasts, packs an artificial penis and wears a jockstrap and men's outer clothing might be considered a crossdresser but not a woman wearing pants and a shirt.

Again, get real.

[Vicky_Scot]

Lets be fair to both sexes, if a man wears a bra he is a crossdresser, only one item qualifies; if she wears any piece of male clothing she is crossdressing and is a crossdresser????????

Totally agree. Of course she is a crossdresser as she is wearing an item of clothing of the opposite sex.

Lets not start moving the goal posts to suit. The only thing is no one questions it and that's the difference.

[Ally 2112]

For what women have went through to get to the point of even being able to wear pants or vote i say let her be. If us gurls want it to be fair for us to wear womens clothes in public it will not be easy and will probally take a long time .In the mean time have fun and do the best to accept yourself and make those changes if you so desire

[CDJoyce]

I don't think she's a crossdresser. Society looks more favourably on women wearing men's clothes than vice aversa. This means that women feel they can wear men's clothes and they don't have that need or desire that I think most of us have here. Women simply don't think of it as crossdressing.

[Ashley090]

Technicaly if we go by definition of CD then yes she is crossdresser. But by the same definition 80% or even more gg's are crossdressers. What is different, is point of view on case FtM and MtF cding. Sadly...
And I must post this pic :D it got point :)
271703

[Georgette_USA]

Technicaly if we go by definition of CD then yes she is crossdresser. But by the same definition 80% or even more gg's are crossdressers.


One question, is the "GG" on the left wearing an actual suit made for men. If so then technically yes could be viewed as such. Problem is that some manufacturers do make female clothes styled like male clothes. I do know one on-line that admits to CD and wears a suit very well. But she does not go for a full on male look.

Not sure how one example gets a 80% or more of "GG"s are CDs. Seldom see many "GG" wearing "men"s clothes. I do see sometimes see Butch Lesbians occasionally wear "men"s clothes. I even dated one for a couple of years back in the 70s-90s, she often wore "men"s clothes. She did not consider herself as a CD, and never thought she identified as a FtM TS.

This does not include some of the FtM TS that I meet and like MtF TS not really CDs.

[ReineD]

But it is another example of the inequity in standards of what is allowed for women but not allowed for men.

Not necessarily. Read on. :)

It depends on how you define "crossdresser". Is everyone who wears the opposite sex clothing, with no intention to appear masculine (for girls) or feminine (for boys), a crossdresser? My dad needed compression on his legs after heart surgery and he found it was cheaper to buy women’s tights with spandex than the stuff they sold in medical supply stores. Is that crossdressing? And we have so many stores that are unisex now … girls and boys wear the same Tshirts, pants, sandals, sneakers. Are they all crossdressing?

I think the defining characteristic is a person’s intention. Do they intend to look more masculine (for girls) or more feminine (for boys) than how they believe is customary in their environments? Of course not every crossdresser aims to pass completely as a woman - we do have several members who present as men wearing dresses. But, the intent is to go outside the bounds of what is considered gender appropriate in their environments.

Does your daughter wish to make a gendered statement when she chooses her clothes?

So if there is no gender statement - no gendered intention behind your daughter’s decision to find loose pants with large pockets and loose, comfortable shirts, then this doesn’t sound like crossdressing to me.

And it works both ways.

If a guy found that all the men’s jeans were too loose on him and he preferred the skinnier jeans sold in women’s stores, I wouldn’t consider this crossdressing either, because jeans are jeans. Or if he found a great Tshirt in the women’s aisle and they didn’t have it in the men’s, I wouldn’t consider this crossdressing because Tshirts are Tshirts. So many of the clothes are interchangeable now - I’ve bought men’s sandals because they didn’t have my size in women’s. And khakis and polo shirts look similar on both sides of the aisle. So unless a person feels a sense of well-being for no other reason than the fact it was bought on the other side of the aisle, it’s not crossdressing.

I think it takes an obvious jump into opposite sex clothing (like bras for people who don't have breasts), combined with an intention to wear opposite-sex clothing for no other reason than it is opposite-sex, to be considered crossdressing (… or underdressing when the goal is to purposely wear women’s underthings just because they are women’s).

Last, I’ve noticed among many young people that they want to depart from the idea of having gendered boxes for clothes and haircuts. They see both sexes as being equal in all aspects of their lives, and it makes sense there should be sameness and equality in their clothing as well. I think it’s rather refreshing.

[TrulyMe]

Probably not. As Reine said, it depends on the intent. Perhaps she know why she chooses to wear those clothes. Perhaps she has not thought about it / figured it out yet... Either way it does not matter.

[Ashley090]

It kind of depend on intension, agreed :) my two cents "Jeans example" - this is realy acceptabe by society in both ways. But it cant be applied to all pieces of clothibg in way "i wear opposite gender clothes bcs i like it more or it fits me better or they have my size." There are many pieces of woman clothing that i wanna wear and only reason is bcs they are better looking/I like style more/ they ara more comfortable and not bcs they are in woman part of clothing store. Still, most is just point of view ;) Why men wearing a kilt isn't crossdresser? :D

[Sallee]

that has been a discussion since cross dressing first began. "Why can girls wear guy cloths and guys not wear girl cloths" I guess the answer is you can wear what ever you like. Does your daughter try to pass as male? If so I would say that makes her a cross dresser Same for a guy does he wear a dress, like a kilt or does he wear a dress and a wig and try to pass as a woman. I think that is the difference

[Acastina]

She's not. But it is another example of the inequity in standards of what is allowed for women but not allowed for men.

Yep, that's my take too. Just an example of the asymmetry. There's a whole category of clothing that's culturally taboo for us, and a lot of the ones who are allowed to wear it as part of a full casual and dressy wardrobe don't much care to do so. That, and a lot of GGs like to wear things that are less revealing, clingy, sexy to keep the creeps from hitting on them.

Then there's real pockets. Ever tried to put your keys in the front pocket of your girl jeans, let alone a wallet in the back?

Now, if she wears her hair real short and swaggers and doesn't shave anywhere and gets into real masculine role emulation, probably an FtM CD...

[Lana Mae]

Reine, Thanks! Your explanation helped a lot! Hugs Lana Mae

[JeanTG]

No, not crossdressing. In crossdressing, I think mostly one is attempting to present as the other gender. Your daughter isn't as far as I can tell.

As for the supposed double-standard. There is no double-standard. Men and women are different. Thus the signal being sent by an article of opposite-sex clothing can be completely different for men and women. I know a gorgeous, tall woman, wife of a friend, who wears men's shirts, but she still strikingly presents as very sexy and feminine. I'm not sure a man wearing a dress, and making no other attempt to pass as female, can pull off "masculine" as effectively as my acquaintance. Except perhaps Corporal Klinger ;)

[ReineD]

You're welcome, Lana Mae!