Jean 103
01-28-2017, 01:03 PM
I know that looking back decisions I made have lead me here on my journey. Some of it was easier than I would have thought. Mostly because of those that have gone before. The one I was thinking of locally is a person that transitioned while on the local police force. I have not met her but have seen a picture of her. A girl at a local TG support group knows her. One of my roommates was also pulled over by her. I have heard nothing but kind words about her. People have mistaken me for her, we don’t look alike. It’s because of how I am and not who I am. Anyway that doesn’t happen much anymore as most people know me. I live as Jean but don’t try and hide my past. For me the past is the past, I tend to look forward. That brings me to the other question.
Who is steering this bus and where are we going? As for now, I have no plans to fully transition. I live as Jean, I only present as male at work. Everyone knows and I don’t have any real problems living this way. That is besides my wife throwing me out and my whole world came crashing down, and that part is not over. I just refuse to deal with it right now. What I’m trying to come to grips with is it’s been almost a year that I drew a line in the sand, and decided to live full time as a women. My friends would say I am not a women just dress as one. They are basically right, but they also take part in my delusion that I am a women. At the one year mark I told myself I would make a decision on where or not to continue on this path. My friends will support me whatever I decide, they think I’m brave and don’t understand why I do it. I see it as being selfish on my part, as plain and simple as, I dress this way because I like to. The reason I went all in was I feel it is easier for my friends and everyone if they see me one way. There are a few that see me both ways. I’m fine with that now, it use to bother me. I’m just so far past that I don’t care.
Why did I come back here? I don’t know. I do know I have changed. How I looked at things before is not the same way I look at things now. The line in the sand was renting a place as Jean. This was like a year after I had been asked by my wife to and did moved out. What is in store for this year? Stay the course? I guess I’ll have to wait and see.
Who is steering this bus and where are we going? As for now, I have no plans to fully transition. I live as Jean, I only present as male at work. Everyone knows and I don’t have any real problems living this way. That is besides my wife throwing me out and my whole world came crashing down, and that part is not over. I just refuse to deal with it right now. What I’m trying to come to grips with is it’s been almost a year that I drew a line in the sand, and decided to live full time as a women. My friends would say I am not a women just dress as one. They are basically right, but they also take part in my delusion that I am a women. At the one year mark I told myself I would make a decision on where or not to continue on this path. My friends will support me whatever I decide, they think I’m brave and don’t understand why I do it. I see it as being selfish on my part, as plain and simple as, I dress this way because I like to. The reason I went all in was I feel it is easier for my friends and everyone if they see me one way. There are a few that see me both ways. I’m fine with that now, it use to bother me. I’m just so far past that I don’t care.
Why did I come back here? I don’t know. I do know I have changed. How I looked at things before is not the same way I look at things now. The line in the sand was renting a place as Jean. This was like a year after I had been asked by my wife to and did moved out. What is in store for this year? Stay the course? I guess I’ll have to wait and see.