Resisting purchases

[Katie789]

Most of you girls know I'm pretty new to this but I think I'm getting my first taste of the infamous "pink fog" =0

I'm very skint rite now and just need a good months but I'm having huge urges to do a reverse purge (a splurge?!) and just get out there buying!

I want my first wig, I want this cute pair of flats I've been looking at for months, I want to get into the thrift shops and grab girly jeans and more skirts!

How do you handle this?

I'm thinking of focussing on what I've got - spending the whole weekend in my dress and heels - maybe give myself a pedicure....or will this just make it worse?

[docrobbysherry]

We want what we want, Katie. When it comes to women's things, the more I learned about the incredible varieties and nuances of them, the more I wanted to wear/have them all!:daydreaming:

I suggest u budget for the things u need/want most. Then, look for them in thrifts. Eventually, practically everything goes thru those stores!:heehee:

[Lydianne]

You mentioned being skint, but it sounds as though immediate buying is still a option.

In my opinion, for the flats, the wig, the jeans and the skirts, in each case, if you definitely know you are going to get it eventually, you might as well get it now, spare yourself the turmoil and start enjoying. Buying the most desired one might take the edge off the urge; so that might be worth a try. However, if you're going to get them all anyway, ... :straightface:

If you're on the fence about whether you actually want it, then wait. Same goes if you might need to save the money for something else, suspect an imminent price reduction, are convinced you can find it for less, are not fully into it, etc.

When I'm in two minds about a purchase I have been considering for some time -and this is not necessarily about buying clothing for CDing-, if I'm going through a period of feeling especially uninspired at work, I spend big to cheer me up and motivate me to want to make that money back.

Storage concerns helps me resist purchases of CD items at the moment. It's very effective :p .

Enjoy your girly weekend. It sounds as though it's going to be amazing! :daydreaming: .

[Teresa]

Katie,
I've found I get a balance now , I go out once a month so I plan my outfits and any buying round that event. Next month we're having a St. Patrick's day party, so I've been out and found a emerald green silk top, to go with a green tartan pleated skirt , total outlay less than £5.00 , I already have suitable shoes, but would like some shamrock earrings and maybe a necklace. I have a limited budget, my big promise to my wife is my dressing isn't going to cost a fortune . Otherwise I've stopped buying just to dress one around the house , I make do with what I have , we're both happy with that situation, what does it matter when no sees me at home, I do like to look my best when I go out it's surprising how reasonable it can be done.

[Nicole90]

I feel the same way at times. Right now I can't stop thinking about this pair of flats at payless. I need to go buy them. It is the pink fog. MY advice probably isn't the best, but I say enjoy it. As Lydianne said, if you know you are going to get them eventually, go get them now and enjoy.

I handle it by wearing what I have in my wardrobe currently. Which consists entirely of what it in my avatar and a pair of leggings. By dressing up, I enjoy the things I have and I do find that it helps

[Gen D]

It is HARD!
I am dress only in house, so every time I buy something, I feel a little guilt.
I try to balance, and also, I kind of fit my wife cloths (the sleeves are short).
I started with pantyhose and bra, than "modification" stuff: wig, breast, corset, heels, makeup - that was a big buy.
than i stopped for a while...
lately I bought flats, earrings and more make up and stocking.
now I am on a rest again...
I had my eyes on some nice pair of boots, but my guilt of buying it just for home use.....

[DIANEF]

Spend money on a good wig (and forms if you need them), Almost everything else can be found in charity shops (thrift stores for our US friends). I got a fab blue dress recently for £5, never worn, and a skirt for £2!!

[Lily Catherine]

If you see something and you still want it after a week, buy it. I've long reckoned a capsule wardrobe is a good idea, although I still carry the baggage of impulse buys that I'm less than willing to purge.

[Maria Blackwood]

I just learned to budget for it.

Three dresses coming from Amazon as I type this. :D

[KimberlyJean]

I've got my style now and I know what I will wear and what I won't, but every once in a while something catches my eye and the thought of it won't go away. I used to fight hard to resist but now I know I will end up buying it anyway, so I don't struggle as much, it's not worth it. Also I have learned that my sizes don't last long and if I wait too long it will be sold out. There was this black plaid tunic online at Venus, I almost purchased it, but didn't. Then the next day I decided that I really wanted it so I went back to their website to buy it and all of the large sizes were sold out. Fortunately this time they got more in stock so now I have a new favorite top. It pairs fabulously with leggings and riding boots. And women's size eleven shoes sell out fast!

[Diane Taylor]

Allow yourself a budget and stick to it. This allows you to buy things you want but not put yourself in some kind of financial problem or guilt trip. One of the things I learned as I went along is that a few well put together outfits are much better than a lot of singular items that don't go with whatever else you have.

[Lana Mae]

I do not know your financial situation. If you can buy it now do so as it may be gone tomorrow! I wanted this nice denim dress with daisies on the chest. I tried to get it three times and it was out of stock, so I back ordered it and got it in 3 months! Some things you just must buy for yourself! Strongly suggest a budget as spending can and will get out of hand if you are not careful! Hope this helps and good luck! Hugs Lana Mae

[RADER]

I have much the same feelings, I must have at least 30 bra's yet I
keep buying any thing that is new, and that is hard for my size.
Next thing is skirts, I have quite a few of them also,
I guess "Lent" is coming up fast, maybe I should put down the
Catalogs for a while.
rader

[Heather Anne]

I know the feeling. Every time I see an outfit be it a dress, skirt, top, blouse that I like I want to buy it. I keep telling myself no unnecessary spending on things I don't really need to have. I have more clothes than I know what to do with. It is not easy saying no to something I want.

[Mgreenva]

I'm out of town on business this week and have bought 4 pair of shoes and of course I love 9 west so that's 2 or and then a 100$ pr of clarks. They just happened to be in a store 80 miles away. And oh the Haynes brand store was right across the sidewalk from 9west and yes I needed 18 more pair of hose (not). I am disappointed that I haven't found a dress I like ut I'm still looking. I can't resist while I'm where no one knows me. I have talked to many of the SAs and all have been encouraging. I just can't resist.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Katie:hugs:, Be$$$ Careful, It$ Get$ real$ Ea$y real $Quick...:daydreaming:...

[Sometimes Steffi]

The budget works for me. But I also have a little stash of mad money when I see something that I just got to have now. Of course I have to pay back the mad money after I use it.

[Nikki A.]

It is tough to say no to yourself, but sometimes you need to. Family and bills need to come first, then set up a priority list and when there is a little extra cash or a windfall go through your list.
Luckily, I have a decent amount of clothing and such at this point in time, so if I see something I like, I ask myself: does it fit well, do I have anything like it, is it something i will wear out in the world and can I afford it now. I have some things and I now look at them and I can't for the life of me figure out why I bought them in the first place.

[mackemlass]

I am currently fighting the urge to order myself a Kubbi! There was an interview with Tara Palmer-Tomkinson which appeared in one of the newspaper supplements a couple of weeks ago, it was conducted shortly before her death and it was too late to change or withdraw the supplement, which had already gone to press. It mentioned she had designed the Kubbi, which is basically a stretch body in which the upper half is designed to look like a man's shirt. Had a look online, I really want one but it's £195 which I just can't afford right now.

[Stacy Darling]

I've just learn't to budget for this!

To be honest I learn't to budget years back and if I hadn't I wouldn't be saying; Go with what you have for now and give yourself some nice treatment.

I think there are a good few reads above mine, so read it all twice and don't get yourself in debt over a nice dress.

[Jenni Yumiko]

slush fund/budget.
We have our bill and necessities budgets, then we both have slush funds. Those funds are what we have for the month for anything non family Or essentials. (Regular guy clothes for me girl clothes for her fall into our regular budgets) her slush fund goes mainly towards crafts, makeup and girls weekends, mine go towards gadgets and Jen clothes. Works well for me. Do I want a new gadget or a handful of clothes this month? This months slush I went with a PSVR, despite needing some bigger bras for some forms I am messing with. Figured I won't be out much this month, so stick with the program and self control. I do tend to cart and save a lot of stuff, if by next month I still want it then I will get it.
We also plan for shopping weekends for us. A few times a year we make a weekend out of it, drop kids at Grammies, get hotel, shop till exhaustion, try everything on that night, return the fits odd or looked better in store stuff the next day.

[mackemlass]

I am currently fighting the urge to order myself a Kubbi! There was an interview with Tara Palmer-Tomkinson which appeared in one of the newspaper supplements a couple of weeks ago, it was conducted shortly before her death and it was too late to change or withdraw the supplement, which had already gone to press. It mentioned she had designed the Kubbi, which is basically a stretch body in which the upper half is designed to look like a man's shirt. Had a look online, I really want one but it's £195 which I just can't afford right now.

Looks like I might have to find that £195 quick, as the company which markets the Kubbi is being closed down by Tara's estate.

[CateNatalia]

I am terrible when it comes to Pink Fog Splurges. I find it very hard to resist, once I've found something I like. I have a story involving a pair of very sexy shoes in a thrift store that ended up being way more expensive because I got a parking ticket in the process of buying them... what made matters worse was the fact that I was preparing for a girly weekend (which was great) so the Pink Fog had really set in.

Today I've ordered another two pairs of sexy heels. It never ends.

But I do try to keep my purchases in check a little. :heehee:

[Brandybea]

I binge on shopping for feminine attire. Usually I save up some cash over the space of a month. Last week I got up the courage to stop into Transformations by Rori in Arlington Heights IL to shop for new breast forms. It was my first time shopping where I wasn't acting like I was purchasing for someone else. What an empowering experience!! And in my enthusiasm of the moment, I not only purchased new forms, but also a bra, stockings, heels and a dress! And to top it off I got to try them on and model!! That feeling of empowerment only spurred me on more because then a few days later I was near an outlet mall and stopped in a Hanes outlet store and purchased a new bra, and several pairs of panties only to be followed by a stop at a Burlington Coat factory where I purchased 8 pairs of new panties. Whew!! Need to take a slight break or I'll be in debt!!! It's nice to no longer have to "pretend" my shopping is for someone else. Ready for the next baby step!!!

[Geena Gee]

As the Borg say, "Resistance is futile!"
I have slowed down on my purchases considerably in the last few weeks. I have also nixed a few items that I thought that were needed. Now there are still a few things that I really want, like some yellow patent pumps, but I've eliminated things like swimsuits (no pool,) and sleepwear, mainly because I don't see myself as a woman in those items. Of course there are some other exceptions, like earrings, but they have to be silver or 14K gold, as the stainless and gold plated ones will turn my lobes black or green. And the same thing happens with rings, bracelets, and necklaces. So for those things, it's pawn shops and estate sales to $ave $ome $$$.
Like many of the other ladies on here, you learn over time, and, hopefully, control those impulses to $hop, $hop, $hop...
Just my :2c:

-Geena

[Maria Blackwood]

"Resisting purchases"

??? Sentence does not parse.

274815

[Kelly DeWinter]

Katie; reading this thread and some of the others it really sounds like you are having addiction type issues along with being a bit of an exhibitionist (another of your posts , dressing with windows open, drinking then wanting to go out afterwards dressed). Now you want to rush to buy buy buy. The good part is you recognize it is a money issue and are looking for a way to handle it. You may want to read up on addictions.

[Gendersoul16]

Hi, Erin here. Been dressing for 35 years. I found that after a while, I only bought special and unusual clothing and the occassional nice dress, coat, and shoes. Moderation comes once one has a critical mass of a wardrobe! ;-)

[Sarah Louise]

On the plus side, now that I have 57 dresses, I'm finding that I usually have at least one in most styles I like. So I usually manage to resist buying more. But now I'm starting to collect skirts and tops at an increasing rate!

[JeanTG]

Moderation comes once one has a critical mass of a wardrobe! ;-)

I think that is about right. I now have 6 dresses and 2 skirts, a bunch of tops, a denim shirt, 3 pairs of jeans, leggings, and 1 pair of shoes, several bras, lots of panties, pantyhose (I consider those a "consumable"), makeup, a wig, and breast forms. I think I have more dresses than my wife actually, who almost never wears hers. It's enough for the number of times that I crossdress (1-3 times per week) than I can go a long time without wearing the same combination twice, though I do often fall back on favorites. I now really just need to round out the collection with a few accessories (clip-on earrings, necklace, bracelets), a pair of pumps (not too tall), a pair of sandals, a pair of sneakers, and a couple of stealth women's shirts (that look male or unisex but button on the female side so I can dress stealth).

It's not much compared to some of you girls but it's pretty decent nonetheless. I love shopping and I do so in person fully admitting for whom I am shopping and I've had some just terrific support from SAs, so that I now feel completely at ease shopping for myself. But I will have to use a bit more self-control next time! I will just slowly add items here and there to keep things fresh and interesting, without blowing a huge amount. Last trip, last week, I went in to buy a little black dress and came out with a $400 lighter purse...

[Fiona.raoul]

I understand the urge to shop, I have a few days to myself later this week and really want a new outfit and something sexy to wear under it. I struggle with it though, I end up purging several times a year and worry about how worthwhile it is to buy something knowing I will just toss it in a few months.

[DIANEF]

I don't buy a lot nowadays as I have enough clothes to last me for years, but who can resist a bargain! Most of my money goes on make up, accessories, shoes ect. You can find some great stuff at charity shops, but I did treat myself to a new red dress recently. I don't need it as I have about 30 already, I just wanted it. If you can afford it, buy it!!

[CarlaWestin]

Carla's wardrobe is immensely reflective of the fact that a lot of money was spent on something other than a sailboat.

[Kelly DeWinter]

Carla; That is so true !

[Traci H]

I seem to have this need to shop and acquire something new on a weekly basis. It's not an out of control need, as it can be something small like a new lipstick or similar. I get in modes where I just want to be shopping for something girly.

Many times I see something I like, like last night. I see something and resolve not to buy it, and then it is stuck in my mind. I was sort looking for some shirts at a local thrift shop and found the selection limited so I cruised the jeans again. I don't need any more jeans. I have about a dozen pair already, but there was a pair of Gloria Vanderbilt's with some small rhinestones on the back pocket. I convinced myself that my wearing of these would be limited and I should just let them go, and I did. But today I want to go back and buy them! Some secret desire to out myself it seems to the rest of the world along with buying things!

[terri-joe]

In Germany there are places people can deposit their unwanted clothes and if you do not mind second hand, there can be treasures to be found. Just yesterday I chanced upon a stash of clothing including maxi skirts, jackets and culottes of my size and not. It can be more interesting this way since you try to incorporate clothing which you will not think of buying into your collection and find new styles which you like and may not have thought of.

[pantyhoselvr kendra]

I have my own walk-in closet full of womens dresses, slips, all kinds of night gowns, teddies over 20 pairs of size 13 high heels. More pantyhose still new in packages that i will ever wear in my life time. Tens of thousands of dollars spent. You walk in there and open the drawers up you would swear you were in a womans closet. I get horny every time i go in there

[Gendersoul16]

I had a sailboat, but I sold that! Seriously......I guess it takes some self knowledge. For instance, I had problems with drinking, and I had to quit for a while. Now I can have an Ale once and a while. Same goes with clothes. If it is really speaking to me, I'll buy, and only then. I have this thing that if I wear something every year I keep it, if not, its to consignment or good will with it.

[donnalee]

I think everyone needs to budget for mad money just in case you run into something too good to pass up. The anticipation is nearly as good as the actual purchase and the thrill lasts longer. Another part of it is constantly looking for deals and the ability to do something when you find one; it's a huge confidence raiser.

[Becky Blue]

I know how you feel, I have the money to buy myself clothes, but very very limited storage. Also I can't justify spending too much on a beautiful dress or top that I may not wear more than once. I do find it very touch to resist at times, but I really don't have much choice.